so if you're wondering why I haven't updated anything, blame sal and q from impractical jokers

[that ^ was written before I updated yesterday lmao]

& if you don't know what that is, please go look it up. everyone on that show is beautiful and hilarious.

"Patrick, there's someone at the door for you," One of Patrick's staff says, interrupting Pete and Patrick's conversation. He's tall and has red hair. "It's Bob,"

"Send him up, Gee," Patrick says. Gerard nods and rushes back down. Pete's eyebrows raise in confusion.

"Bob?" He asks. Patrick smiles.

"You'll see," And sure enough, a strawberry blonde man comes bounding up the stairs seconds later, rushing to Patrick's side when he spots him.

"Are you okay, Pattycakes?" Bob asks. Patrick laughs and nods.

"Yeah, babe, I'm okay," He says. Bob smiles and presses his lips to Patrick's forehead. Babe? Patrick has a boyfriend?

"Who are you?" Bob asks Pete. Pete glares at him.

"Who are you?" Pete asks. Bob smirks.

"I'm Bob Bryar, Patrick's boyfriend," Pete's heart sinks at that. "Now who the fuck are you?" Bob asks, hands on his hips.

"Pete Wentz, Patrick's caretaker," Pete tells him after he finally figures out what words to use so he doesn't piss Patrick's ass of a boyfriend off. Bob doesn't look convinced until Patrick pulls him down and whispers something in his ear.

Bob's mouth drops open as he leans back up. "You hit my boyfriend with a car?" He asks. Pete nods slowly.

"Accident, Bobby," Patrick reminds him. Bob swallows before turning back to Patrick.

"Pattycakes, I've got to go do some stuff with the movie. I just wanted to drop by and make sure my baby was doing fine," He smiles at Patrick. He glares at Pete before pecking Patrick's lips and making his way back to the door. Before he leaves, though, he turns to Pete and says, "I'm watching you,"

Pete raises his hands in surrender as Bob leaves. He waits until he hears a door slam before mumbling, "What a dick,"

"That's my boyfriend," Patrick informs him, like he didn't already know. "Don't talk about him like that,"

"Whoa, cool it, Stump," Pete says. Patrick rolls his eyes at him. "So. You're gay," Pete says after a few minutes of awkward silence.

"Pretty much, yeah," Patrick comfirms. Pete just smiles. "Why're you smiling?"

"'Cause I've most likely got a chance when you and dickface break up," Pete says, leaning back and putting his feet on Patrick's coffee table.

"When?" Patrick asks carefully. Pete nods.

"When,"

--

"Wentz, get your ass in here," Patrick yells. Pete doesn't run. He walks at his normal pace, eyes widening when he finds a shirtless Patrick trying to put some skinny jeans on.

"I don't know whether to laugh or be really turned on," Pete says honestly. Patrick shakes his head.

"Just stop the flirting for five minutes and help me," Patrick commands. Pete shrugs and makes his way over to Patrick, grabbing the younger man's hips when he gets to him. Patrick yelps.

Pete helps him into the ridiculously tight black skinny's before tightening his grip to keep Patrick still. Patrick grabs a black short sleeve button up and puts it on, not being able to button it because of his physical state. Pete helps with that, too, before he sits Patrick back down. The latter is breathing heavy when Pete hands him a leather pair of Doc Martens.

"Where are you going, Mr. Fancy?" Pete asks, grabbing Patrick's crutches and handing them to him.

"Bob's movie premier. You're going too," Patrick says. "Hand me that Green Bay hat first, please," Patrick says. Pete does as requested (only because Patrick looks seriously hot and said please) before he makes his way to the space of closet that's his.

He takes his shirt off with his back facing Patrick, only turning around when he feels someone staring at him. Patrick, sure enough, has his eyes fixated on Pete's stomach -- or lack thereof -- when he turns back around.

"Patrick," He snaps his fingers. Patrick visibly shakes before he meets Pete's eyes and then turns a dark shade of red.

"Sorry, sorry. I just, uh, like tattoos," Patrick says shyly. Pete smirks at winks at him before turning back around to grab a band tee. It's a band he really doesn't listen to. Fall Out Boy. He just thought the shirt was cool.

Right as he's pulling on a pair of jeans, Andy bursts through the door with Joe on his arm. Pete and Patrick share a knowing look as Andy blushes.

"So you're dating the enemy?" Patrick asks. Andy shakes his head.

"We're not dating. He's simply accompanying me to the premier. Let's be adults about this," Andy tries to reason. Joe looks surprised when Andy explains.

"Does that mean you're not going to kiss me again?" He asks. Pete laughs loudly, Patrick failing not to keep his in as Andy turns bright red.

"Shut up, Joe," Andy says. Pete barely had time to pull on his boots before Andy's ushering them out the door. "So, Patrick, you're going to meet Bob on the red carpet. He's going to help you down it, making sure you don't bust your ass or whatever. Pete, you're going to walk down with one of Bob's friends, Brendon,"

"Whoa, Brendon? He's not gonna try to, you know, seduce me or anything, right? 'Cause I'm really only interested in one person at the moment," He says, stealing a glance at Patrick. The latter is blushing, head down as he fixes his hair before putting the hat back down.

"Don't worry about B," Patrick assures him. "He's got a crush on Bob's costar, Dallon,"

"That's right," Andy says. "He's wanted Weekes for weeks," Andy fails to make a joke as no one in the car laughs. "Fuck you guys,"

"It wasn't funny," Patrick says honestly. Pete nods.

"I actually didn't get it,"

"Dallon's last name is Weekes. And Brendon's been in love with him for a while," Andy explains. Pete then laughs really hard for a good minute.

"That was actually hilarious," Pete says once he calms down. Patrick rolls his eyes.

okay, so andy's going to be hilarious.