(I SWEAR I HAVEN'T DISOWNED THIS STORY AJDHHAS it's been a month since the last update, forgive me. hopefully this chapter is half decent)

♥║ twenty-six ║♥

The school day is unbearably normal, considering Jungkook's biggest crush slept in his house the night prior and kissed him. Taehyung acts fine, though, which Jungkook tries to do to, except he can't stop glancing over at Taehyung's face and his lips and his cheeks turn red as if everyone around them knows what happened.

Taehyung doesn't kiss him at school, or hold his hand, or anything romantic. Jungkook isn't offended—maybe disappointed is the right word. In movies, whenever two people kiss, it's almost like they're automatically official and spreading gross PDA everywhere. He sort of assumed it would be like that today at school with Taehyung. Not a nasty makeout session in the middle of the hallway or anything, but he did imagine his hand being held on the way to class.

He's being stupid, he knows that. He's never been in a relationship, and he's only getting his hopes up from everything he's seen on television. This is reality, he has to remind himself. It's not going to be all cutesy, picture perfect.

He just thought...

Well, he just thought.

At the end of the day, he's exiting the corridor when he spots Taehyung near the front of the school, biting his bottom lip like he's anxious about something. He keeps looking out to the parking lot, then to his phone, then back to the parking lot. He's going to make his lip bleed if he doesn't calm down.

Tentatively, not really knowing if Taehyung wants Jungkook to just approach him, Jungkook speaks up softly. "Hey. Are you waiting for someone?"

Taehyung jumps despite Jungkook's quiet voice. "Yeah," he says with a breath, shoving his hands into his pockets. Jungkook can still see him gripping his phone tightly, even through the fabric. "My brother, actually."

"Oh." Jungkook still barely knows anything about Taehyung's brother except his close-mindedness. He doesn't know exactly how to prepare him for alone time with the elder. "I... I can wait with you, if you want?"

"No," Taehyung says quickly, his eyes widening before he clears his throat. "No, it's fine. You should start home before it gets dark."

It's barely three in the afternoon...

"Right," Jungkook mumbles, sensing his presence isn't welcome right now. Undoubtedly because of Taehyung's homophobic brother, but still... Taehyung can't say he's hanging out with a friend? "Okay. See you tomorrow, I guess."

This day certainly is not living up to his romance-fiction expectations.

Jungkook starts to walk off when Taehyung sighs. "Please don't be upset."

He frowns, facing the elder again. "I'm not upset."

"Yes, you are. And I know why, because it seems like I don't want to be around you but that's not the case, I swear." Taehyung takes a hesitant step closer after surveillancing the parking lot again. "It just... scares me."

Taehyung, the most confident person Jungkook knows, is scared of what his brother thinks of him. He can see it clear as day in his wide brown eyes; there was no need for Taehyung to even say it.

"I understand," Jungkook assures him. "It's fine."

Taehyung stares at him like a lost puppy. "It's not fine. I don't want to have to hide how much I really do like you, Jungkook-ah."

Then don't, is what Jungkook wants to say, but he knows all too well it isn't that easy. He's still worried about what his mom thinks of him, despite her positivity and acceptance about who he is. He still feels trapped.

So as selfish as he wants to be, he understands Taehyung's situation too well to be that way.

"Really," Jungkook says with an attempted smile. "I understand, hyung."

"I feel guilty."

"Don't feel guilty."

"I feel like a bad person."

"You're definitely not a bad person."

"I—"

A car horn suddenly blares, and Taehyung jumps so far away from Jungkook it actually sends a pain through his chest.

A handsome man rolls down the passenger window, peeking over his sunglasses. "Hurry up, man. Mom is making me do a grocery trip for her."

Taehyung groans. "We just went to three grocery stores this weekend!"

"She found a sales paper for a store downtown," Taehyung's brother replies. "Gotta get them deals."

Taehyung rolls his eyes, shrugging his backpack further up his shoulder. He glances over at Jungkook, not daring to hold eye contact as if that would somehow give them away. "Bye, Jungkook. See you tomorrow."

And by the time Jungkook can get past how bad he genuinely feels to reply, "Bye, Taehyung," he's already gone.

***

The rest of the week plays out very similarly. The two talk during the day with the rest of their friend group, then part ways after school as if they're merely friends.

As if Taehyung never kissed him.

Jungkook is still hung up on that. He can't help it. It was his first ever kiss from his first ever crush. Do people normally act like kisses don't happen? Is it only significant to someone like him? Someone used to not being wanted?

He's overthinking it. He knows Taehyung's brother is the reason the elder is being so distant but... He can't lie and say it doesn't hurt.

Because it hurts like hell.

The two haven't even had a phone call in the evening like they used to. Their hands haven't brushed in the hallways. Their faces haven't gotten any closer than the formal speaking distance. Taehyung barely looks at him now, like he's paranoid everyone at school knows his brother and will rat him out for liking someone society says he isn't meant to.

Jimin finds Jungkook in the courtyard at lunch on Friday. After a few days of suffering through lunch with Taehyung right next to him, acting as if he isn't, he couldn't take it. He decided time with the outdoors and his camera is what he needed.

"Figured you'd be here," Jimin remarks, sitting next to Jungkook in the grass.

Jungkook raises his camera, getting a shot of the sun streaming through the leaves of a large oak tree. He hopes it develops nicely.

Jimin clicks his tongue. "You know, I don't see what's so photogenic about trees."

"They're beautiful," Jungkook mumbles, in the midst of snapping another shot in case the first doesn't come out well. "They're self-sustaining. All they need is the sun to come out every morning."

"Then they aren't self-sustaining, dumbass. They need water too."

"Actually, trees can hold—"

"Okay, Jungkook, let's stop bullshitting." Jimin sighs, turning to face him as he crosses his legs. "I know you're upset. Everyone knows you're upset. You're not acting like yourself. Even you don't normally take six pictures of the same tree within five minutes."

Jungkook ignores him, yet again raising his camera.

Jimin pulls it down gently, removing the strap from around Jungkook's neck. He sets the camera aside, forcing the younger to look at him. "I'm worried about you."

"I'm fine," he says, keeping his eyes anywhere but on Jimin's.

"You're not fine," Jimin replies, nudging Jungkook's shoulder. "Remember how we said you have to talk about it if you're upset? You promised me, Jungkook."

Jungkook exhales heavily through his nose. The last time Jungkook had an episode where he went a week without getting out of bed, Jimin literally thought he fell off the face of the earth. He let his phone stay dead, he let the food that his mother brought up to him rot on his nightstand, and he wouldn't let his mother tell Jimin about it. Even when Jimin stopped by the house after two days of not hearing anything, his mother told his best friend that he was sick and highly contagious.

Jimin flipped his shit when he found out later on about Jungkook's mental state.

To this day, though, Jungkook hasn't been that bad. Not since he's had Jimin by his side, always making sure he has a friend to talk to.

Jungkook shrugs. "It's stupid."

"Probably, but the stupid things are the ones that bother people the most, so spill it."

"I just..." Jungkook looks down to his lap, fiddling with his fingers. "Taehyung's brother is really homophobic, apparently, so... Taehyung just hasn't been acting the same with me."

Jimin is quiet a moment before he says, "You know, Yoongi hasn't told his parents about me, either."

Jungkook frowns. As lovey-dovey as those two can be, he's surprised his parents can't see right through it. "Really?"

"Yeah. His dad is an asshole. Like... a really big asshole. Some of the shit I've heard him say to Yoongi over the phone is ridiculous." Jimin shakes his head. "Anyways, Yoongi went through a little phase like this, too. Where he didn't want to talk to me at school. That's why he used to get so embarrassed, but he overcame it. Just give Taehyung some time to adjust to his brother being home."

"Yeah, but... How do you... It sounds so pathetic," Jungkook grumbles, annoyed with himself. "How do you stop feeling... hurt?"

Jimin gives him a bittersweet smile. "You don't."

"That doesn't help at all."

"Jungkook," Jimin sighs. "Listen. It's so painfully obvious that you two like each other, and if I really thought that Taehyung didn't feel the same towards you, I wouldn't keep egging the two of you on. You think I like to see you so sad?"

Jungkook feels like a baby now, his parent lecturing him.

"This weekend, let's all hang out," Jimin decides. "Tomorrow we should go skating or something. I don't know. Just something. I can be your wingman again."

Jungkook rolls his eyes, but manages a genuine smile. "Thanks."

"I'll shove Taehyung so he falls on top of you, and you can get your second kiss out of it."

"A little too dramatic, but I appreciate it."

"Oh! Or I could get Jin-hyung to take your pictures, then shove your faces together at the last second."

"What is your obsession with shoving us?"

"Or I could—"

"I'm going to walk off now."

Jimin laughs, grabbing Jungkook's wrist to keep him from getting up. "Fine, I'll stop. You get the point, though."

Jungkook shakes his head at the older male. "How did I come across a friend like you?" He says it teasingly, as if Jimin is some burden when he's quite the opposite.

Jimin grins knowingly, saying, "Just lucky, I guess."