It was not very early in the morning. It was nine o'clock but the boys were busy attending to the princess's demands. She may be kind but today, she decided that she will be bratty and order around the poor boys that fawn over her beauty and charisma.

Levi groaned. He was always the one getting picked on aside from the boy named Connie who has a burning passion for football. Maybe Levi was getting picked at for being older than most of the boys or maybe he was getting picked at for being small.

"Guys!" Connie called out to the group of boys. "Let's play football!" He said as he raised his hand that contained a ball made of scrap paper and most probably, a rock in the center of it. "It's gonna be fun!"

Levi's mouth hang open upon seeing the boy's idiocy. Anthony rolled his eyes. Eren slapped his palm to his face and Reiner looked away, praying for the poor soul named Connie.

The sun was rising but it did not dare burn them. It merely shot out some of its gentle rays that were hidden by some thick and plump clouds. It simply gave adequate light to see things clearly. The weather was fair though some days, storms rampage the skies. It was still early spring and this was Levi's third day inside the squire camp.

Historia sat on a log, a makeshift chair. "Football again?" She said in her Transatlantic accent. She did not really speak like this in normal occasions, she just happened to use this certain accent to intimidate the boys (which is probably not working compared to what she anticipated). "And why are you saying such vulgar words such as 'gonna'?" She faked a face of one who is ill. "Learn how to speak properly, you mongrel."

The boys winced in behalf of Connie for mongrel was not really an appreciative word. It was meant to hurt someone but Connie just stood, eyes fixated on Historia and he kept this dumb face as his hand held his makeshift ball.

"What's a mongrel?"

Reiner groaned and Bertholdt just stood, sweating to the ground. Eren shook his head as Jean tried his best to stifle a laugh. Armin, same as Jean, resisted the urge to laugh. Marco's mouth hang open, marveling at the level of nonsense of the boy. Severino snorted. Sure, he might be Connie's friend but he cares only a little. Anthony exhaled in exasperation while Levi simply blinked.

"It's a dog with mixed breeds, hence disgusting." Historia said as she thinned her lips in contempt towards the boy. "And you're a mongrel."

After her explanation, Connie seemed to get what she meant. He stood motionless, probably too shocked and dumbfounded to react against the insult. He blinked and then drops of tears slid down his cheek. Quickly, he slapped his hand to his lips that were about to wail.

He was clearly insulted.

The other boys quickly finished their tasks for the day to avoid any more insults coming from the princess.

•••

Levi, as always, could not sleep. It was one of those days that he loathed and didn't like. In these nights, it was when he had to suffer thoughts that he could not imagine that he could think of.

His eyes were sore and felt like they were peeled and sprinkled with salt. This sensation caused him to blink and blink until a tear slid off from both of his eyes.

He closed his eyes as his brain randomly projected images that would not make any sense at all.

He thought about how many hours will it take for him to fall asleep in peace. He never felt like this when he stayed in Erwin's manor.

He missed the lavenders and longed for a whiff of the flowers that brought him delight. Alas, he took them all for granted or so he thought but he does recall calling the lavenders something that was quite unpleasant. Perhaps it went something like: "I'm sick at looking at them."

He sighed and sunk his head as deep as he can on his pillow. His pillow was not like the ones he had at Erwin's manor. He used to sleep on pillows stuffed with fluffy feathers but now, all he had was a threadbare pillowcase stuffed with cheap synthetic fibers.

He thought about everything he took for granted. The lavenders, his uncle...and the moments he spent with Erwin.

He bit his lower lip. He did not think that thinking so much would bring one person so much pain and turmoil.

He turned to his side and pulled his blanket around his body. He did not really like being in the tent with all these squires that was more immature than a brat who only knew how to play in the mud. He wanted to lie down beside Erwin during the night. He would love to hear Erwin breathe in and breathe out as the taller man drifts off to sleep with his peaceful and handsome face. He missed staring and getting lost into those intensely blue eyes.

Levi's heart throbbed as he thought of Erwin and he felt it ache in longing for the man.

He truly is pathetic.

He rose from his bed and stared at his sheets that were all over the place. It seems like he tossed and turned a lot.

He was in the aisle of bunk beds and he stepped and went through the bunks while walking barefoot. His feet were slightly shivering as he took every step on the cold cobblestone floor. Quietly yet steadily, he made it out of the room.

The squires and knights were staying at this old castle which evolved into a place where knights and their squires  can stay for the night. Staying at the castle was also part of their training exercise.

He made it to the hallway and it was lit up by nothing but a torch. It was a little hard to see things and Levi had to squint in order to make out things. Sure, the torch gave light but it's light is only limited so by going forward, the intensity of the light slowly dwindled down until darkness consumed Levi's vision but he kept on going and searching. He knows that somewhere, Erwin is there. He knows that in one of these rooms, Erwin reposes. He just needs to be careful to not open the wrong door or else he will get into trouble.

He tried to recall the parts of the eavesdropping he made earlier in the day. It was about Nile, Kieth, and Erwin conversing about which rooms they will keep for themselves as the night passes by.

It was something about being down the hall "where I can see the pine trees from my window" as Erwin had stated. Levi knows that this phrase could mislead him but he longs for Erwin so much and even if his brain screams at him to stop and go back, his body just won't stop taking another step in failure or success.

His sweat started to slide down his pale neck. He could be wrong but he was in front of the door down the hall where he can possibly see the pine trees in the room using the window. He clenched his fist and knocked firmly at the door thrice.

A second felt like forever but he heard the lock click and saw the knob turn and seeing this made his breath hitch.

The door creaked open and relief washed over his anxiousness.

"Oh, Levi." Erwin said as he leaned by the wooden door post. "My squire. How are you?"

My squire. The words echo in Levi's head. Somehow, without any right explanation, the phrase made his heart clench in pain. So is that how you see me? Is it just it? Your squire? He thought but he pushed it at the back of his brain.

"I feel...splendid." Levi replied with slight hesitation. He put his hands at the back and tried his best not to fidget. "How about you?"

"I am fine though I feel a little bit tired from teaching all these new recruits. I know it's in a short notice but the recruits need to be as versatile as they can be. We are short of knights to defend us from the rebels that are stirring up a revolt..." Erwin said and that was when Levi noticed that Erwin was wearing nothing but pants. This bothered him but he tried to maintain his straight face by focusing on Erwin's face and not staring at anything else.

"Aye, aye." Levi said, panicked about what he should say. "I can see that. I do hope that the younger recruits can make it but Erwin, why are you telling me these things? Is it not confidential? Also, why are you not sending me back to my room? I believe that is part of your job." Levi asked as he leaned on the wall on the other side of the hallway and this made him to be a little far from Erwin.

"It is because I believe I can trust you for you are my squire."

For you are my squire.

Why? Is it how you see me? Levi thought as he stared at the taller man's crystalline eyes as he tried his best to hold back the tears that were piling up on the corners of his eyes. Am I just really a squire to you? Can you not talk about anything else now but that?

Levi yawned, allowing to his tears to slide down his cheeks while having a valid excuse for tears on his eyes. "Oh, I see." He replied. "I am probably  bothering you now. I should go-"

"No, stay." Erwin said softly as he tugged Levi's hand as the shorter man walked away. "I actually want some company for tonight. I'm not saying that you should stay here all night in my room but I just want to talk to you for a bit. We were not able to talk for a long time because of my schedules. I am sorry for that."

Levi listened as he fixed his eyes on the watery hallway that was barely lit up by the lighted torch. He turned to Erwin and looked at him at the place where he always wants to look at, Erwin's eyes.

"Alright. I shall keep you company for a while." He said as he walked back to a relieved Erwin.

"Thank you." Erwin said as he gestured for Levi to get in his room. "Please make yourself comfortable."

Levi went in as Erwin closed the door. He plopped down to the man's bed and felt resentful when he felt the luxurious silk sheets covering the man's bed.

Levi was staring at the ceiling as he tried his best not to blink his tears out. He never acted so emotional around Erwin but now he did and he sees it to be ridiculous.

"So," Levi started, his voice cracked as he spoke. "What are you doing? How are you still not asleep?"

He could hear Erwin chuckle sadly. He sat up and turned to Erwin who sat at a wooden stool. His eyes widened as he saw the wooden stool for it reminded him of the one that he and Erwin painted. He was awe stricken but he kept his mind focused and waited for Erwin's response to his question.

"I was writing poems to..." Erwin choked a sob and turned his back to Levi. "My late wife..."

His eyes widened in shock.

His late wife?

As he processed the truth, he heard Erwin sniffing. The man must be crying so Levi stood up and hugged Erwin's back.

This night was not like the ones they spent together in the manor. They was no formalities, no one was stronger and superior than the other. They were just both human beings that longed for someone that is not with them anymore.

"Erwin..."

Thanks for still being with me guys! Thanks for 500 followers too! I appreciate it so much! Thank you also for waiting for this chapter.