The past couple of weeks were a blur, I was so busy with work and Chris was away filming. I have a relaxing shower and do my skin care before packing the rest of my suitcase for going to Europe for a month long work trip, I packed light seeing as it was now July hopefully the weather wouldn't be too bad and if so I could always buy what I need. I get into bed with damp hair and get the alarm on my phone for 5am giving me enough time to have some breakfast and get to the airport, coffee could wait until I got there - nothing is better than an airport Starbucks!

It felt like i'd just closed my eyes and it was time to get up, I hated those kind of sleeps I thought as I dragged myself out of bed pulling on the clothes I layed out the night before. I have some toast before leaving the house, I get to the airport and meet my colleagues and other influencers going on the trip, there was around 12 of us going and we all happened to be girls - hot girl European summer? Yes please! We all get a Starbucks and board the plane, we are all sat next to each other in first class, before taking off I text Chris telling him i'm on the plane and will text when I get there.

The following day we all get up early for meeting's and a photo shoot, I spoke to Chris on the phone and we joked about how he can't pretend he doesn't miss me, to be honest - I missed him as well and these next few weeks were going to pose as a challenge but i'd have time to myself to decide if the divorce was going to be finalised or if we were going to give it another try.

The weeks had flown by and it was coming to the end of the trip, I was thankful because I was begining to miss home. Europe was so beautiful but nothing compares to LA, i'd got a lot of content for my instagram and developed a few new products for my make up line which would be released later in the year, after the long flight I couldn't wait to get home, have a shower and get into my own bed. I wait at the belt for my suitcase and that's when I see him walking through the airport looking for me in his blue jeans, tight blue tshirt and his staple sunglasses. Jesus he looks amazing. When Chris gets to me he lifts me and gives me a bit sloppy kiss, we need to stop the kissing until we've had a conversation about our relationship.

We arrive home just after noon and I'm exhausted, I go straight to bed disregarding the shower as my eyes grow heavy. I sleep for most of the day and around 8pm I begin to toss and turn, I was feeling sick but trying to convince myself that if I fall back asleep i'd be fine. Of course that was the complete opposite, I jumped out of bed making it to the toilet bowl just in time as the vomit starts. After the sickness I stand up washing my hands and splashing my face with cold water in hopes that it would help. Thankfully it did and I was able to sleep for the rest of the night.

The following morning I had an appointment with the doctor for some routine check up. I sit on the hospital bed as doctor Anderson takes my blood pressure and heart rate.

"Is there anything you're worried about with your health?" She asks, I think for a moment before shaking my head. She takes a vile from the drawers and hands me it asking for a urine sample to test, I go to the bathroom and come back sitting at the desk this time as she checks the urine for any indications of problems internally. She washes her hands and sits down typing on her computer but not taking her eyes off the screen as she says "I'm assuming you know you're pregnant? I'll book you in for further appointments with our maternity department.".

The whole world seems to stand still as I look at her and repeat the words in my head, i'm pregnant. Butterflies fill my tummy and everything she said afterwards was taken in one ear and out the other.