Unhelpfully enough, it didn't get any better from there.

The day had barely started, and Dan was already the center of attention, the topic of every single whispered conversation he stumbled upon and the focus of every pair of eyes that glanced at him with smug awareness. Like they knew all the details of his life and how badly he was living it. Well, the thing was, he really didn't fucking need their input. He already knew how bad his life was, and their opinions and snarky comments were not doing a goddamn thing to change that.

He'd spent the better part of an hour hiding in the showers after being interrogated about his allegedly wild sex life. It was about the only place here where he didn't have to make direct contact with anyone who could potentially make him feel even worse. He could have just gone back to his cabin, back to his bed with the sheets pulled over his face until the summer was over. But then he remembered Phil, who was probably still asleep and completely unaware of the drama he was apart of, and Dan really didn't want to go back and be the one to break it to him. They'd just barely gotten back on good terms with each other and now there was even more problematic shit he'd have to deal with. If making new friends was always this hard and anxiety-inducing, then he was very glad he hadn't done it before.

This was how he dealt with things: avoid the problem until it either wore itself out or blew up in his face completely. He didn't know how longer he'd be able to keep it up, being in such close quarters with the very problem itself, but it sure as hell beat facing it head on.

The morning was almost over, and Dan was hidden behind one of the activities buildings, away from pretty much everyone. His back hurt from being pressed against the wall for so long and he was sweating bullets through his T-shirt, but at least he was alone.

He had no fucking idea what to do. There was no easy or sensible way to handle this, not without some major confrontation on his part, and that was fucking number one on his very long list of Don't Fucking Do That. As soon as he thought he'd caught a break, and let his guard down, the entire thing shattered and left him confused and miserable. He hated it here. He hated the mood swings he had recently acquired, hated feeling bad about everything he did at any given moment, and he hated that he kept falling for the illusion of placidity. He needed out.

His head was a wicked turmoil of doubt and self loathing, but he tensed up when he heard footsteps, someone who was trying to be discreet but not quite making it. Great, just what he needed, someone sneaking up on him.

"Please go away," he said, loud enough for whoever it was to hear him. "I'm trying to hide from my responsibilities in peace."

"Aren't we all?" Nick stepped around the corner. He looked guilty, and that was reassuring, but Dan still cursed under his breath and wished he were literally anywhere else. This was not what needed to be added to his shit pile right now. "I-I can go if you want me to--"

"Yes, I want you to."

"Okay." Nick crossed his arms over his chest, but didn't move to leave. "Can I just say I'm sorry?"

Dan smiled and looked over at him. "For what? Sleeping with me? That wasn't your fault. Telling everyone about it?"

"I didn't tell anyone."

"Then how, exactly, does the entire camp know?"

"Look," Nick said, stepping closer. "I know you have this mental image of my 'reputation' or something, but I don't sleep with people so I can blackmail them if they don't do everything I say. If people find out, it's because that person told them. I don't know where it got twisted up, so that now I'm the bad guy, but I've never told anyone about anything I've ever done with someone else. You have to know how manipulative teenagers can be."

Dan stared at his knees, stubbornly refusing to acknowledge that, Nick had a point. The only problem was, only four other people knew about what had happened: Finn, Emery, Phil and Chris, and each seemed as unlikely as the last to go spreading rumors about him. He barely knew his bunk mates enough for them to want to ruin his summer so maliciously, and Chris didn't even know Nick's name. So unless someone else had seen them leave together, or unless Nick was lying to his face, then that was the only other option.

"This isn't me believing you," Dan said after a moment, staring at Nick harshly. "but...if you're telling the truth, I'll forgive you."

Nick smiled gratefully. "I'm still sorry," he said. "I didn't want things to end up so shitty for you."

"Yeah, well, I'm used to it."

So maybe he didn't hate Nick so much now, but he still froze when the guy decided to sit next to him. This didn't make them friends or anything, did it? Dan felt like he had enough of those already, and anyways, Nick wouldn't be his first choice. But hey, what the fuck else could possibly go wrong?

"So is the other part true?" Nick asked, very ungracefully. "Did you sleep with Phil Lester, too?"

"You know, the entire reason I've been hiding behind this building is so no one would ask me that exact question." His tolerance was running incredibly low, and he didn't think he would last through whatever interrogation Nick was prompting towards. "Does it really matter anyway?"

"No," Nick said. "But it's an interesting concept. He's not well-known for his promiscuous ways."

"I didn't sleep with him. We're just friends." And now he felt bad all over again, thinking about how Phil was probably dealing with this and how Dan was just hiding from the whole thing. It wasn't very helpful of him, leaving his friend to deal with the mess all by himself. If they were even friends anymore.

"You know it's all bullshit, right?" Nick said, and Dan looked over at him. "Most of these people wouldn't even know your name if it weren't for those rumors. You shouldn't care about their opinions so much."

"I don't care," Dan explained, because it was true. People probably thought he was hiding because he was scared to face them, but he didn't care what they thought. "It's just.... disheartening. They care too much about other people's business, and then get angry when someone else does the same thing to them. Like, an endless cycle of backstabbing and spreading lies. It's bad enough in high school, I figured it wouldn't be a problem here."

He knew he sounded super fucking fake deep and whiny, but it was true and he didn't know how else to explain it. Nick nodded slowly, probably trying to understand what he'd said, but he didn't respond.

They sat in silence for a while, and Dan was honestly kind of grateful for it, even if it left him with his less than positive thoughts.

Maybe it was Fate. Maybe every single horrible thing he was being put through was a major sign from whatever higher power, telling him to get his life together. If it was, they weren't being very specific about what it was that needed to be fixed, and he wasn't very good at guessing. Most likely, he was just making things a million times worse for everyone, and that wasn't going to change too soon; he was reckless and oblivious by nature.

It was sort of ironic, because he tried his hardest to lay low and not draw too much attention to himself, but the harder he tried, the more it went in the complete opposite direction. He figured it wasn't his outstanding personality that made people notice him, but that left the question of what exactly did. His boyish good looks, his total inability to walk three feet without embarrassing himself? He just wished it wasn't there, he wanted to disappear into the background of their radars for the next forever. That would be great.

"It's probably not my place to give you advice on this," Nick said suddenly, breaking the tense quiet and watching Dan shrewdly, "but maybe you should just talk to him. If you don't want to mess things up entirely. I think sitting here by yourself is inherently making it worse." Oh yeah, the Phil thing.

"Trust me, I know." Dan sighed. He dug his face into his hands, blocking the sun and the trees and everything else he hated from his sight. It made him feel slightly less nauseous. "I'm not good at that stuff. Confrontation, and... talking about feelings. He probably won't listen anyway." Not to mention, even if he did hear Dan out, Dan had no clue what exactly he would say. Sorry seemed entirely too overrated at this point.

"Okay, well, I agree with whatever decision you make," Nick said, "but I don't think you have much longer to think about it."

Dan looked up at him and was going to ask what he meant, but he saw that someone else was rounding the corner of his hiding place, and yeah...

"Hey," Phil said slowly, staring at Nick warily before shifting his gaze to Dan. He stuffed his hands into his pockets and shrugged. "I'm not interrupting, am I?"

"Nope," Nick said shortly as he stood up and brushed dirt off his jeans. "I was leaving, actually." And with another fleeting look at Dan, he left them alone.

There was a very suffocating minute of pure awkward and guilty silence between them, and Dan was reeling quite harshly at the suddenly change of events. Phil sat down in the spot that Nick had just left, but he seemed a lot more content with staring at his hands than saying anything, and Dan sure as hell was not bringing up the glaring problem between them.

He had to know. If he'd gone all day without hearing a single word about his alleged sex life with Dan, then he really must have been out of tune with the world around him.

"So..." Phil spoke lightly, his voice completely empty of the anger or accusation that Dan had been expecting. "Were we just a one night stand, or do you expect casual sex from now on? Apparently, people are betting on us, and I've got 20 dollars on the line."

Despite his self-hatred, and the constant stream of commentary in his mind telling him he was a fuck up and a bad friend, Dan couldn't stop himself from laughing. "God, you're a moron," he said softly.

Phil smiled at him. "I'm sure you mean that in a very nice way." He leaned back until his head was resting against the wall, and said, "I know you didn't start those rumors. I'm not mad or anything. And honestly, it's not the worst thing that's ever been said about me."

That was a very hard thing to believe, and Phil must have known that because when Dan arched a questioning eyebrow at him, he just shrugged and didn't elaborate.

"Okay," Dan said evenly. "So I've been hiding all day for nothing?"

"Pretty much."

He felt kind of stupid now, for being so overdramatic, but it was a small feeling that didn't come close to the relief that washed through him. He wished it was this easy all the time, to talk to people and have them actually understand his side of things. Being friends with Phil was going to seriously raise his expectations of what he expected from other people. It was slightly unnerving.

"I'm still sorry," Dan said, looking over at him. "I didn't think anyone would assume something like that."

"Goodness, Dan, you do remember that it was me who crawled into your bed, right? If anything, it was my fault."

That...was a good point, actually.

It was right then that Dan realized he didn't even care that people knew about him and Nick. He'd been so much more worried about Phil hating him, and now that he knew it wasn't a problem anymore, it felt like the biggest fucking weight had been lifted off of his chest.

"I just wonder why they would think we were sleeping together at all," Phil went on, staring off in thought. "I mean...we don't give off that kind of vibe, do we? Are we really gay together?"

"Oh man, I really hope we are," Dan said mockingly serious. "That would save me a lot of trouble."

Phil started giggling, and after that, any remaining tension between them seemed to disappear.

Dan wanted to keep this for as long as he could, this sudden and intense need to trust someone so completely; Phil was trying to make himself a part of Dan's life, and if the last few weeks were anything to go by, he was very much succeeding.

***

As soon as Dan woke up, he knew something was wrong.

He felt strangely heavy, and at first he thought it was just his still sleepy mind struggling to fully wake up, but when he tried moving to get out of bed, he....stuck.

"What the--" It was the weirdest and most uncomfortable situation he'd ever been in, and he didn't even know what was going in, which of course only made him panic even more.

"What the fuck?" That was Emery's confused voice, and Dan assumed they were in the same predicament. "Is this...honey?"

"You've got to be kidding me." Finn growled from his bed, and a second later there was a dull thud as he rolled off of it onto the floor.

Dan sat up the best he could and stared at his bare arms with a range of emotions he could barely comprehend as they passed: worry and embarrassment and anger and disgust, all wrapped up in his chest and making him tense up. What the fuck was happening right now?

His entire bed was covered in amber honey, and he could feel it sliding down the back of his neck from his hair. His fucking hair, he had no idea how he was going to be able to wash that out. And when he looked away from his own personal space, he realized the entire floor of the cabin was slick with it too, even parts of the wall. His roommates looked as bad as he probably did.

"The door's jammed," Phil spoke up from where he was pulling at the door insistently. He didn't even seem too bothered by honey all over and around him. "Someone's locked us in."

"Dammit," Em swore as he tried to rub his arms and legs clean. "I bet this was fucking Peter, I'll kill him."

"What the hell is going on?" Dan said. He shoved his wet blankets to the side and reluctantly stood, ignoring the way his feet sank into the floor. "What is happening right now, this is....this is really fucking gross."

"It's a prank," Finn said. He looked the worst of them all with his entire face covered in the stuff, and the furious expression he wore did nothing to alleviate the growing frustration. "Stupid fucking Peter Wells in cabin 3, he always does this shit to somebody every year, and it's never funny."

Phil tried the door again, but as much as he violently twisted the handle, it wouldn't open. Dan was starting to freak out a little bit; he absolutely hated being in situations he couldn't control, and this was slowly wearing away at his already thin sense of calm.

"Move," Emery said, and nudged Phil out of the way to try and most likely break down the door himself, but just as his hand touched the wood, it swung open.

It looked like the whole camp was circled around their cabin, pointing and laughing at the four sticky teenagers stumbling through the door, and Dan was too wound up to even see the innuendo in this situation.

"This is just fucking disgusting, Peter," Finn said through his teeth, shaking his arms to dislodge any stray drops. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Oh, come on," said a tall red-head with freckles covering his face and neck, out of breath with laughter. "You have the new guy, you had to have known he'd be the target."

Dan realized they were talking about him, and flushed as he stared down at his hands. He was really fucking sick of everyone going after him just because it was his first year here. And not only him, but his bunk mates too, which only made him feel guilty as hell.

"Well," Phil said, honey sliding down the side of his cheek slowly. "I guess we should hit the showers before all the hot water is gone. We'll have to deal with the mess in the cabin later."

They pushed past the crowd of people (who thankfully moved out of their way in order to avoid the mess) and headed to the showers.

45 minutes and half a bottle of shampoo later, Dan decided he was as clean as he was going to get for right now, and stepped out of the shower with a towel around his waist. Finn and Emery were still in their own stalls, but Phil was standing at one of the sinks, vigorously scrubbing his shirt with a bar of soap. He grimaced when Dan stood beside him.

"Officially clean?" he asked.

"As I'll ever be," Dan said with a sigh. "I've got honey in places that definitely should never be exposed to such horrid stickiness."

Phil laughed and went back to scrubbing. "Well, it's all apart of the camp experience, I guess. The new kids always get pranked first, it's a law."

"How many times am I going to be 'initiated', exactly?"

"If I remembered, I would tell you."

He really hoped this would be the worst of it, because if things got anymore out of hand, he would probably lose his fucking mind. It was bad enough being surrounded by all these new people with crazy, all-over-the-place personalities, but having them specifically target him for their rumors or pranks wad something he would much rather not be apart of. He could not be the only new person here.

"Just don't take it too much to heart," Phil said, turning the sink off and wringing out his shirt. Dan watched him idly. "They're not out to get you or anything, they just want to have fun. And it's what they're used to. So don't, rip their throats or anything. Unless they really deserve it."

Dan smirked. "And when will they really deserve it?"

"When they hog tie you and leave you in the woods until three in the morning." Phil laid his shirt out across the counter and turned towards Dan, crossing his arms over his bare chest. His eyes flicked down to Dan's collarbone. "You missed a spot," he said, reaching out and wiping off whatever goo was still sticking to his skin.

The room was suddenly stifling, and Dan realized that Phil wasn't moving, that his fingertips were tracing his neck, his throat, his shoulders slowly, leaving behind hot trails in their path. The sound of the still running showers went dull in his ears, and he swallowed thickly, trying to calm his racing heart.

Holy fuck, he was blanking out, and he seriously could not let his guard down right now because he would end up doing something very stupid.

"You okay?" Phil asked, breaking through his hazy mind and making him focus, even though Phil's hand was still on him, on his fucking stomach now. Did he have any kind of fucking boundaries?

"Peachy," Dan muttered. Maybe he should have been questioning what exactly was going on, but that would probably make Phil pull away, and he was enjoying this a little too much for it to end just yet. Hell, they'd already slept in the same bed, this was tame compared to that.

Were they getting closer? Phil seemed a step farther into his personal space than before, his hand sliding around Dan's waist, and Dan was not fucking complaining about the change of pace. His chest felt tight with anticipation, making his pulse jump and his face flush. Phil leaned up just the tiniest bit and Dan would swear he could feel him breathing, there couldn't be more than an inch between--

"I'm pretty sure there will forever be honey in my roots." Emery walked around the corner of the showers, running a hand through his hair angrily.

Dan and Phil jumped away from each other so fast, they nearly fell on the water soaked floor. Dan felt his face burning red in embarrassment at being caught in such a compromising position, but Phil gave Emery an impatient look that went unnoticed.

That couldn't have been real. Dan shook his head and went to get dressed, conveniently giving him a reason to be by himself for a little while. There was no way Phil had actually been going to kiss him at that very moment. And there was no way he would have let it happen. He couldn't have let it happen.

But there was that stupid fucking voice in the back of his mind that kept saying the complete opposite, and even though he pushed into the very back of his mind to forget about it, he knew it was right.

***

a/n: damn who am i anymore, actually updating something for once

okay so like i totally understand if no one reads this anymore, I knooooow its been 10 years since I last updated I am so so sorry things have been a little crazy these last few months with trying to finish high school successfully and find a job and apply to college and stress about every small thing in life

but I am free now so for the next three months ill probably try to update all my stories and maybe even finish some (gmsotb right???)

I haven't forgotten about you all and thank you sm for being patient and putting up with my lazy ass I know I'm very frustrating I love you

see you next time :3

(remember when my an's used to be cool and relatable wow a concept)