He would like to say that things went spectacular. That he'd gotten over the petty dislike towards his parents for sending him here, and that Chris's presence made the whole thing at least a tiny bit bearable. That he was fine.

But he wasn't very big on lying, even to himself, because he was shit at it.

In the most simple of terms, it was boring. The four of them sat a reasonable distance apart, just enough to be able to hear each other without having to be responsible for initiating a conversation, and didn't say a word besides commenting on the weather (which was hot) and asking how he was doing (which was 'fine'). Chris tried his hardest to make things less depressing, but his sex jokes fell flat and left everyone feeling mildly violated.

"Hey," Chris leaned over to whisper in his ear, "are we going to be here much longer? I feel like I'm going through withdrawal, I haven't had a smoke since this morning."

"You're not allowed to smoke here," Dan whispered back, trying to ignore the way his parents were watching them curiously. They never liked being unaware of everything that had to do with him, especially if it involved any of his delinquent friends.

"I'm not a fucking camper, the worst they can do is tell me to leave."

That didn't mean he wouldn't get in trouble for letting it happen. But he figured it was better than suffocating in this death trap of a family reunion, so he stood up and dusted off his legs. "We'll be right back. Bathroom."

His mum smiled, a thin, tight-lipped grin that clearly showed she knew they weren't actually going to the bathroom, and that she one hundred percent disapproved of whatever it was they were actually up to, but she didn't say anything against it. "Don't be too long, then," she said, and it was almost annoying how much free will she gave him. They were both trying too hard, and it made him sick.

"You're not even trying, are you?" Chris said as they walked, headed towards the secluded cover of trees that would hide them from any passerby who could possible get them in trouble. He was probably breaking quite a few rules right now, but it felt good, almost like he was back at home, causing trouble at school with his friends. He was even making his parents mad again. "They're making an effort, at the very least you could pretend."

"Or," Dan said sarcastically, "I could ignore them until they eventually leave me here again, even though they know I don't want to be here and don't deserve it."

They had reached a point in the forest where it was sure they wouldn't be seen; Chris pulled a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and lit one, not caring to check if anyone was potentially spying on them or something.

"All I'm saying is, they're your parents." Dan watched as thin wisps of smoke unfurled from Chris's lips. "And, I mean, you did set a classroom on fire."

"It was a fucking accident," Dan said in frustration. He hadn't done it on purpose, was anyone listening to that part? "And fine, I deserve to be reprimanded for it, but come on. Forcing your kid to waste his summer at some place in the middle of nowhere with strangers? Cruel and unusual punishment."

"Oh, shut up, you don't hate it that much." Chris rolled his eyes at him. "You've already slept with a hot guy and made enemies out of your roommates, you seem to be pretty productive already."

Dan toed the ground, shoving his hands into his pockets. "That's not stuff to be proud of."

"I didn't say it was good, just productive." Whenever it seemed like he was on the verge of giving some actual, helpful advice, it always seemed to turn around and slap everyone in the face. "And what about that guy you totally want to bone? Are you gonna stop being a wimp and talk to him, or wallow in your pool of self-pity all summer?"

"Fuck you," Dan said and shoved his shoulder, laughing. "He's a person, not a sex toy."

It was very inconvenient that Chris had picked up on the tension between him and Phil, because now it was all he cared about. It seemed like it was his job to get them together, the way he continuously brought it up, and Dan was getting a small headache from it.

"You know what you have to do?" Chris asked, as if he were the messiah of other people's relationship problems. Dan shook his head, knowing it would do no good to try and stop the conversation now that his friend had gotten wound up about it. "Make him jealous."

"Jesus..." Dan dragged a hand across his face, wondering where the hell Chris came up with this stuff. "You're outrageous."

"Just listen," Chris insisted, flicking his cigarette. "Okay, he's totally into you, anyone can see that from a mile away. So if you pretend you're not interested, maybe flirt with some other guys here or there," he snapped his fingers for emphasis, "he's yours. He'll want to get your attention, but you play it off at first, make him fucking beg for it. Then, give him what you both want."

He had a pleased look on his face, obviously very proud of his keen advice-giving skills, but Dan burst out laughing, and he frowned.

"You're kidding, right?" Dan asked in between giggles, holding his stomach. "You honestly think that'll work? Is this how you pick up other people? Well, I can see why it doesn't work very often--"

"Oh, go fuck yourself." Chris snapped at him impatiently. "It's worked better than anything you've ever tried."

Dan leaned against one of the trees behind him to catch his breath. He wished the rest of his summer would go something like this, laughing his ass off about stupid things with friends and pushing all of his responsibilities to the back of his mind. He had a strange feeling it would be completely different, though.

"Why can't you just stay here?" He asked quietly and tried not to sound like some whiny twelve year old who was scared to be alone. "It's no fun without you. Everyone else is so lame."

"Not my style," Chris said, looking around at the sunlight streaming through the leaves of the trees in mild disgust. Dan laughed once.

"And you think it's mine?"

Chris shrugged vaguely. "You fit in quite nicely, really."

He didn't even want to know what that was supposed to mean, and was saved the painful awkwardness of asking by the sound of someone else approaching their super secret hideout in the middle of the forest where anyone could see them.

"You two don't look suspicious at all." It was Finn, joining their small group with a flourish that made it clear he wasn't staying long. He eyed Chris's cigarette warily. "You're not supposed to smoke here. It's a fire hazard."

Chris gave him a pointed look and blew another cloud of smoke almost directly in his face.

Dan had no idea what it was, but almost as soon as they had met, the two of them had taken an immediate disliking to each other. He'd asked, but neither were too keen on sharing any details, but it left a bad feeling in his chest; they were both good friends of his, and it felt weird that they obviously didn't get along at all.

"What's up?" Dan asked, trying to distract them both before they ended up fighting each other for no apparent reason. He breathed a sigh of relief when they relented to staring studiously in opposite directions.

"There's a volleyball match happening later tonight," Finn said to him. "Everyone wants to know if you're coming. And by everyone, I mean Emery and Nick."

Dan's stomach gave a small lurch at the mention of Nick's name, but he shook it off quickly; he was trying his hardest to not let that whole mess affect the rest of his summer. But the fact that Nick was suddenly so interested in him made him both terrified and intrigued. The guy was hot. "I'm not much of an athlete."

Finn shrugged. "You don't have to play, most people will just be watching anyway."

And how else was he supposed to get out of it? All of them wanted him to go, and he hated disappointing people. Plus, it sounded like pretty much the whole camp was going, and it would leave him to be the one loser who decided to stay in his cabin while everyone else was having fun. He didn't want to be tagged the weird antisocial kid before the first month had even gone.

"Okay, I guess I'll go." He knew he sounded less than enthusiastic, but Finn still looked pleased as he turned to leave, not even bothering a look in Chris's direction.

"You're too nice for your own good," Chris spoke up as soon as Finn had disappeared. "You could've said no if you didn't want to do it."

"I want to do it," Dan argued back halfhearted, but deflated at the condescending look he was given. "Fine, maybe I don't want to do it. But I have to."

"God, I need to get you out of here," Chris muttered. "You're not even the same person anymore."

"Stop being so dramatic."

"No, you stop being so goddamn susceptible," Chris said, and Dan was surprised at how angry he sounded. "I mean, do you even fucking see yourself?"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Dan asked. From what he could tell, he hadn't done a single thing to make Chris mad at him, and if this was how the day was going to end, then he would much rather it have not happened at all. Birthdays sucked.

"It means that you're different," Chris said. "I mean, you're hanging out with these pricks that you normally wouldn't even glance at, like it doesn't matter, like you haven't spent the last three years of your life dedicated to isolating yourself from them. And since when have you ever been scared to talk to a guy you like? And volleyball? Really? What the fuck is up with you?"

"You're angry because of my decisions? Do you know how stupid you sound?"

"Don't try and make me seem like some kind of bad guy," Chris said. "You've been gone two weeks, and suddenly your the epitome of fucking popularity, hanging out with the cool kids and acting all docile and shy around some pathetic guy, I'm just trying to figure out where I fit into to all of this."

"Don't worry about it." Dan shrugged. "I'm not trying to start an argument with you. I'm only gonna be here for two months, might as well make the best of it. Even if that means changing some things about myself."

"What the fuck ever, Dan," Chris said, pushing his cigarette against one of the trees and putting it out. He turned and started to walk away. "Do whatever you need to make these people like you, I don't care."

"Are you fucking serious?" Dan shouted after him, but Chris didn't look back or respond.

What was his problem? This was supposed to be a good day, and now his best friend was getting pissy at him for nothing? But he wasn't going to dwell on it too long, so he took a few deep breaths, pushing down his frustration and anger, and started to make his way back to where his parents were probably wondering where they had gone off to.

He hadn't really been keeping track of the time, but it was a lot later than he was expecting. The sun was starting to sink behind the trees, casting the sky in dark reds and oranges, and when he got back to the spot he'd left his parents, he found that they had packed up all of their stuff, obviously getting ready to leave. Chris was nowhere to be seen.

"Visiting hours are almost over," his mum said gently. She seemed to sense that he wasn't in a very good mood, but didn't say anything about it. "We need to leave soon."

"Oh. Alright." Okay, so maybe he hadn't been too stoked about them coming in the first place, but now that they were leaving, he felt bad. They probably thought he hated them for making him come here, and they would think that for the rest of the time he was gone. "I'm glad you came to visit."

"Of course, sweetie, we weren't going to miss your birthday." His mum smiled and pulled him into a hug, and his dad did too, a second later, until he was sufficiently suffocating between their affection. "And if you ever need anything, you can just call, but I'm sure you'll be fine, you've always been good on your own. Just in case though."

He smiled at her coddling, and before long, they were waving goodbye and climbing back into their car. Chris was already in the backseat, having given him only a short wave as a farewell. He didn't want to have lost one of his best friends over something to trivial and irrational, but there was no time to try and fix it now.

The headlights disappeared around a corner, and Dan continued standing there, leaning against the table, as it grew darker around him.

***

Dan was pretty much ready to fall into the obliviousness of sleep. His day had been so much more dreadful than anticipated, and at this point, it was pure luck and strength of will that was keeping him upright at all. The sun had set and his limbs were weary with fatigue and sadness, but apparently, now wasn't the time for him to catch a break.

He'd forgotten about the whole volleyball thing. From the way he heard other kids talking about it, it was a some huge deal. And he'd promised to go.

"Is it too late to change my mind?" Dan asked, wrapping his arms around his chest stiffly as he followed Finn to whatever spot this was supposed to be taking place. "I have a headache. I think this might be pushing it." It wasn't a lie.

"You'll be fine," Finn waved him off. "It's not exactly an extraneous activity, sitting and watching a game."

"Maybe for you, but I've spent eighteen years building up a resistance to anything having to do with the words 'outside', 'sports', and 'other people'."

But there was no more room to argue his point, because they reached the stretch of land that would serve as a makeshift court. It was already pretty filled up with other campers, sitting on towels and blankets, talking and laughing and drinking and being way too much for him. There was a net stretched across the middle of the grass, but Dan couldn't see anybody who might potentially be players.

He didn't know a single thing about volleyball, except the general rule of getting the ball over the net without it going out of bounds, so he was sure this wouldn't be too interesting for him.

Finn led him to an empty spot on the far side of the space, where a few coolers were grouped together so that people without blankets or towels wouldn't have to sit on the ground. They joined a crowd of Finn's friends, and Dan sat slightly apart from them so he wouldn't intrude on whatever inside jokes they were sharing.

The longer he say there, the more he began to realize he didn't want to be here. Chris's words from earlier rang through his head, and he guiltily accepted that he had been right. These people weren't his style, this whole place wasn't something he wanted to be apart of. Maybe they liked him well enough, and hell, maybe he can sometimes enjoyed himself, but it was majorly temporary. Come autumn, and he wouldn't even remember their names. This was a punishment. It was supposed to be, at least.

But there was a small, very minuscule, voice in the back of his head that was telling him something different. That, as much as he played the attitude 'I hate life and everything it means' card, he got tired of it. That he wanted this, however deep that want was.

And he was allowed to have good things, right?

He was staring at the ground so intently, he almost didn't give any notice to the pair of beat up sneakers that stopped next to him, until someone spoke to him.

"Hey." He looked up at Phil in mild surprise; he didn't exactly know what kind of terms they were on right now, but this was the second time he'd initiated a conversation with him today, so maybe it was getting better. Phil nodded at an empty spot next to Dan. "Okay if I sit here? Nowhere else seems very...appealing."

"Yeah, go ahead," Dan said, folding his hands in his lap. There was plenty of space on the open field they were in, but Phil still sat close to him, so that their knees were brushing together. He didn't mind it.

Finn didn't seem to notice the new arrival to the group, and Dan was a little bit glad about that. He kind of wanted this moment alone, for a little bit.

It was uncomfortably quiet between them for what felt like ages, the memory of their last unfortunate encounter echoing in the silence and making it difficult to act like it had never happened or something. But apparently, Phil had come with a plan.

"I know I'm probably not your favorite person right now," he said, as there was something about his voice that made Dan shudder. "But I thought I should at least try and apologize. It's just...I've seen way too many people who get involved with Nick, and either get their hearts broken or end up some bitchy asshole who thinks they're better than everyone else. But you're not like that, I guess. I shouldn't have judged you so quickly. I'm sorry."

His head was turned down, watching his hands twisting nervously on his thighs, and Dan looked at him, trying to discern any telltale signs that this was some kind of joke or another prank. But Phil seemed genuinely sincere about his apology. "It's understandable, I suppose," Dan muttered gently, but Phil shook his head.

"No, it shouldn't be," he complained. "That was a horrible thing to say to you, and I don't even know why I--" he broke off with a sardonic laugh. "I'm not usually so harsh."

"It's really fine, Phil," Dan assured him firmly. "You didn't mean it, so I forgive you."

"Okay," Phil said. "Good, then."

Dan looked away and was surprised to see the game had already started, the two teams tossing the ball back and forth over the net. He didn't know how long they'd been playing, and he found he also didn't really care. It was just as uninteresting as he thought it would be.

"This is so boring." Phil said, voicing Dan's thigh by out loud as he leaned back onto his hands and watched the game with unfocused eyes. "I really only came here to talk to you."

Dan turned to look at him, and smiled. "We should leave, then."

It was a flimsy and half-hearted request, but Phil smiled back at him like it was the greatest idea in the world. "You want to?"

Should they? No one would notice. Finn had pretty much forgotten he was there, and no one else would even give them a second glance. Would they get in trouble?

Did that matter?

"Let's go." Dan climbed to his feet, pulled Phil up with him, and they snuck off towards the trees without looking back.

"We should go swimming," Phil said calmly, as if it was completely normal to go swimming at night when they weren't technically allowed to. He laughed at Dan's disbelief. "What, is that too much for you? You know how to swim, I've seen you."

"Doesn't mean I want to freeze my tits off for fun."

"You'll be fine," Phil said, grabbing his wrist and pulling him in the direction of the pool; it was less embarrassing than the lake, he had to admit. "It's warmer at night than during the day."

There was no one else near the pool, and it was eerily quiet where they stood at the edge, staring at the smooth surface of water reflecting the moonlight. Beside him, Phil suddenly took off his shirt, and Dan averted his eyes as he began stripping of the rest of his clothes, until he was only in his underwear. His thighs were fucking amazing.

Phil sat down, dangling his legs into the water, before pushing off and going under completely. He popped up a second later, shaking his head and looking up at Dan, who was still fully clothed. "Are you gonna come in, or make me look stupid all by myself in here?"

"I don't know..." Dan said hesitantly. He really didn't like swimming, and this entire situation screamed the likelihood of him embarrassing himself beyond imaginable...but he was also curious. This was Phil's idea of fun, and it wasn't very often he saw that.

"You don't have to," Phil said quickly. "I'm not forcing you or anything. But at least stop being so stiff, you're making me self-conscious."

So Dan only took of his shoes and slipped his feet in the water, surprise at how warm it actually was; maybe they heated it at night or something. He watched Phil swim a few laps across the pool, trying his damn hardest not to get too distracted by his skin. After a few moments though, Phil retired and came to sit up on the she next to Dan. Dan didn't take notice of the few water droplets that got on to his clothes.

"I just realize I never got to wish you a happy birthday," Phil said, slightly out of breath as he pushed his wet hair out of his face.

"Jeez, don't remind me." Dan shook his head. "Can't wait for it to be over, honestly."

"What, you don't like your birthday?"

"I don't not like it." Dan shrugged. "Just this one in particular. No offense or anything, but I didn't think I'd be turning eighteen in the middle of some dirt-filled, bug-infested surrounded by people I barely know and nothing to do that is actually enjoy. Not very satisfying."

"You should have just asked me, I would have satisfied you."

"Fuck you." Dan grinned and shoved him away, but Phil splashed him with pool water, making him gasp. "Oh, you're dead. I'm definitely killing you now."

"Well, if you want to do that," Phil said smugly, dropping back into the water and paddling backwards, "you'd have to come in here."

Dan bit his lip, debating the pros and cons of this. But he ignored his racing heart and sweaty palms, standing up and pulling his clothes off to jump into the water after Phil.

***

a/n: i was gonna add some;;;)))other stuff, but this chapter was getting too long already, and i'm also trying to make this burn as slow as possible and not get too impatient and end up making them just like have sex in the fucking woods or something

i know it's been forever since i updated any of my stories, but i felt like this needed to go first cause so many people have been asking (yelling) for an update, and i love this story i do, i have........plans

but almost 4K words, that's crazy where's all this creative material coming from?????????? where was it in all of my other stories?????

yea but it's almost 11pm so i'm gonna go, thank you for reading this it means the world to me as always, and i'll see you next time, love you, peace :3