Jacob

"Come sit with me for a moment my son." Mama Said. I walk up the porch stairs, " what do you think of the pool?"

I kiss Mama and sit beside her on the beach.

" how has it been? Being back home?" Mama asks

"It's been great. It's nice to see everyone. The kids grew fast. Declan wow. And Charlotte's a mini-me of Katie."

"And what about Rachel and Matty?" Mama asks

I'm put back by Mama's questions, "Well Rachel's not 16 anymore. And the sacrifices she's made to take care of you and to bring Matty here. Trying to finish school and upgrade your house, which, by the way, is almost better than some of my partners. And Matty seems like a great kid. Cute too."

Mama laughs, "yeah he keeps me laughing."

"Rachel's good for you isn't she mama?" I ask already knowing the answer is yes.

"Rachel has always been good for us." Mama said looking at me.

I nervously look at mama, " mama I have to tell you. In the city, There's someo —, "

"Granny! Granny!" Matty runs out of the door and falls on mamas lap.

"Oh look who the rooster woke up!!" Mama laughed picking up Matty to sit on her lap.

"Hi uncle Jacob." Matty said with his fist in the air.

I laugh, "hey little man. Did you have a nice sleep?"

"Yes I did. Mama told me the pool is ready?"

"It is." Mama says giving zrburt kisses to Matty. I smile at them. I remember mama doing that to me. I smile at the memory.

"There you are." Rachel says at the door way. Matty laughs as mama continues the zrburt kisses. I smile watching all of them. "Come everyone. Breakfast is ready." Rachel said as she went in. Matty jumps off mama and runs inside as I grab a hold of the wheelchair and roll mama in.

"Oh mama Jane. The doctor called. He said he will come by today. He wants to check in on you and how alls going." Rachel said as she puts the plates of food on the table.

I sit beside mama and look at her, " mama. What happen anyways."

Mama looks around the table at the food, "oh. You know. Old age kicks in."

" True but losing mobility isn't something that comes with old age, especially all of a sudden. The doctors can't find anything? Have you done a lot of tests? Have they done any tests? You know it's a small town. I can take you to the city and go to —, "

"Jacob John Bridgestone!! Stop!" Mama yells. I look at her frusturaing expression. " please. Let's eat. I'll see what the doctor says and I'll ask the questions."

"I want to be there when he comes." I say as I pick a few pieces of bacon.

"You don't need to Jacob. The doctor is an old friend of mine he will take good care of me." Mama said eating her scrambled eggs.

"But I'm your son and I love you." I said more firmly.

Mama looks at me like she's debating what she should say. I don't think it's a difficult question.

"Fine." Mama says, " if your home when he comes than you can be there but please let me ask the questions."

I take a fork full of food into my mouth, "I'll be home all day." I said. I want to get to the bottom of mama's health. I've been occupied by Rachel being here, but I'm worried about mama. She seems healthy which makes this more scary of why she lost the use of her mobility. " Rachel, if you want to take some time to study for school I can watch Matty too."

"Yeah!! I like that!!" Matty shouts.

Rachel looks at Matty strongly then to Mama. I look at mama. Why does Rachel need mama's approval when I offer to help?

"Thank you. I won't take long. I'm almost done an assignment."

"Then can we go in the pool?" Matty asks lounging towards Rachel.

Rachel reacts to catch him and laughs. " yes we can."

I smile at this little family that mama has here. I look at Rachel,feeling admiration and gratitude that she came to help Mama. I couldn't imagine Mama being alone.

"Come Matty, help me out the dishes." I said as I pick up some dishies. Matty gets up too

"It's okay. I'll do it." Rachel's says getting up.

"Ray. I got this. You made breakfast. While I'm here, We'll split the chores, deal?" She locks eyes with me. I take this second to look at her beautiful face. Her expression changes. She relaxes.

"Deal." She says.

I smile at her, " perfect! Okay little man. Do you want to help?"

"Yeah!" Matty shouts. I laugh at the energy that this kid has. It's contagious.

_________________

"How have you been feeling, Jane?" The doctor asks when he sees Mama Jane rolling to the front door.

"Oh you know. Day by day." Mama said, "you remember my son, Jacob."

The doctor looks at me with a big smile, " Hey Jacob. Long time no see. How's the city treating you?." The doctor says extending his hand to greet me.

I shake his hand, "hey Doc. Good except I didn't like hearing that mama isn't doing well and no one knows why."

"Jacob, mind your manners. Doctor Thomas is doing his best." Mama jumps in.

"Yes Jacob. Sometimes the human body goes through changes and it takes time to figure things out." Doctor says as he goes through his bag.

"No disrespect doctor, but I think if I took mama to the city maybe doctors there have broader experience with a multiple illnesses." I said trying to sound as respectful as I can.

"Jacob!!" Mama yelp.

"It's okay Jane," Doctor Thomas said nervously, "it's understandable for the family to feel helpless." Doctor Thomas looks at me. "Let me run a few more tests then if we find nothing concrete here, then I would professionally recommend seeking broader advise."

I look at Doctor Thomas's smile. He looks kind and confidence. I feel mama's dagarting eyes looking at me. I smile at the doctor, "I trust that you will give me updates."

Doctor Thomas nods his head.

"Sugar, can you make me some lunch. I'm hungry."

I smile at my mama, understanding my time with the doctor is over. I make my way upstairs and knock on Rachel's door, "hey Ray? Do you want lunch?" I ask.

"Sure. Thanks." I hear rachel say.

"Okay. Give me 10 mins." I say

"Okay."

I stand at the door, debating if I should talk to Rachel about how I'm feeling. I mean, I need to talk to someone and right now she's the only one I want to talk to, "Rachel. Can I talk to you?"

I wait for a respond

"Yeah come in." I heard Rachel say hesitatly.

I open the door. Rachel's room was tidy including the bed. Some of Mattys toys and clothes stack in the dresser and on the floor in the corner. Katie's white furniture is still in this room and it looks new. Rachel turns on her chair from in front of the computer uneasy looking at me, "about what?" She asks.

I hesitate, "about Mama. I can't shake the feeling that things don't add up. I think the doctor isn't looking at this the right way. I want to take Mama to the city and have her check." I sigh.

Rachel stands up, " I know how you feel. But convincing your Mama to leave is nearly impossible and you know it." I react to Rachel's truth, " look, I heard you talking to the doctor and I think you have every reason to be worried," Rachel gently grabs my hand. I look at her hand holding mine, " but in the end if Mama wants to give doctor Thomas the benefit of the doubt then we have to wait."

I nod my head, but I'm not listening to Rachel's words any longer, but feeling the electricity in the pit of my stomach. The electricity that's running through my body and jump starting parts of my heart that I had locked up and hid from my senses, my memories and my heart. I look at Rachel with tears forming in my eyes. Rachel's sympathetic expression melts the glass prison that encased my feelings for her and the voltage of my secret desires for Rachel turning on full throttle. Holy shit... I'm in deep trouble.

"I did some exploring and search up exercises that can help with your mama's legs," Rachel lets go of my hand and turns to her computer. She taps her chair with a smile on her face, signaling for me to sit down.

I follow her direction with excitement and confusion. Just yesterday she wanted to kill me. Today she's holding my hand. I know she said me being here has been messing with her but I didn't know it is to this extent. But when she held my hand, I think that was the part that broke the horse back. I'm dumbfoundedly unsure of my life now.

"Here. I can help mama with some exercises in the pool. The buoyancy can help ease any discomfort that she might feel and maybe help her mobility to be better."

I snap back, now catching on to what Rachel is telling me, "aquatic therapy?"

"Yes!!" Rachel cheers, "I need your help though." Rachel says as she changes the screen on her laptop, "can you help me assemble this?"

I look at the screen. It's a lift to help those who can't walk to be transported into a pool. My eyes wide. Rachel's doing this for my Mama? I should be doing this. Katie should be doing this.

Katie and Mama believe in Rachel enough and her love for my family to trust her with Mama. My heart beams for this woman before me. She's no longer a teenage girl that I fell in love with, but a beautiful independent woman who I can't fuck up anymore. I suppress any feelings for Rachel and close my eyes. Mama needs Rachel more than I do, and I'm not going to screw that up.

"Rachel this is fantastic. I love the idea. Let's do it."

"Yeah. You think so?" Rachel laughs with joy and relief, "Perfect. Because the lift comes today and I'll print out some exercises right now. We can start tomorrow." Rachel says as her fingers dance on the keys of the keyboard. I smile watching her joy. That's the Rachel I remembered. The bubbly one. The one who always saw things in a positive way.

I smile at her. "You still want lunch?"

"Yes please!" Rachel cheers. I walk out and make my way to the kitchen. I see Matty watching TV. I smile. Mattys curl up watching cartoons, "Hey champ. After lunch do you want to go for a horse ride?"

Matt looks up at me, smiling, "Yes!"

I smile at him. Yeah. I like Mama's little family here.