Jacob

I drove to the city to meet Billy. I really need to get out of town. I need space from the idea that maybe Mama will never walk again. And the lift. Rachel's idea of helping Mama is wonderful but the Doctor doesn't seem optimistic that things are going to get better for Mama. I'll try to call my doctor in the city and start setting something up for her. I don't care if she screams at me. I'm going to figure this out.

I also need space from Rachel. She's everything wonderful. Strong, caring, kind, loving... she makes me smile. She also makes me miss Zoe. Zoe has zest. She's a fireball in getting things done. She is witty and knows how to capture a room full of eyes. She knows what she wants and gets it. She works hard and always aims high. And she loves me. Rachel... well I'm not sure. She smiles at me and then yells at me. She has a child to care for and I can't disturb her focus on raising Matty.

I shook my head pulling up to Billy's house. Tonight's not going to be about women. It's about two guy friends hanging out and catching up.

"Hey, spitfire. Am I the best choice for you tonight to ride your stallion ?" Billy teases making his way into my truck, "You couldn't find a wildflower for tonight?"

I laugh at Billy's comment. He always knew how to make me laugh. Don't be fooled by his small-town bantering. He's a smart guy. Good looking too. Not sure why he has no girlfriend yet. He learned everything about mechanics from his dad. By the time he went to get his license, he was teaching a few things to his teachers.

"No. No wildflowers tonight. Just a cactus." Laughing at my own joke.

"Well, I do have a prick if you want to give it a try." Billy jokes back.

" No. No. I'm fine with the wildflowers." I laugh as Billy opens his window.

"LOOK OUT FOLKS! BRIDGSTONE AND GORDON IS OUT PICKING WILDFLOWERS TONIGHT!"  Owhhh." Billy yells at the top of his lungs out to the city.

I smile at him. I said no talk about women tonight but I'll have to break it to my best friend that I'm taken. Maybe. I think.

We both walk into the bar. We grab a beer from the bar and settle into an empty booth close to us.

Billy downed his beer, " Easy man, we have no curfew." I said to him when he put his glass down.

" Nah it's what the doctor ordered after a hot day." Billy said looking around the bar, "Speaking of Doctor, how is Dr. Thomas doing? Isn't he retiring?"

" I don't think so. I guess he's okay. I don't like his way of caring for Mama though."

"Yeah I know the feeling. When my parents started showing signs of aging, I couldn't just sit there and watch. I had to do something. Anything really, to get them better. I couldn't, of course. My mama just got over the flu.

" Really? I didn't know that."

"Yeah, it scared the cow's shit out of me. I called my Dad every day, checking in."

I nod my head feeling guilty. I had n't checked in with either Katie nor Mama. Maybe I wouldn't  have if I knew Rachel was living with my mama. But would I have come to town knowing she was here?

" You-who. Billy, where did you go?"

"What?" I said snapping out of my thoughts.

Billy laughs, " I remember that dumb daze look in your eyes. Spill it."

I grab my drink nervously. " Spill what?"

"The wildflower that you're smelling." Billy said in our code. 'Smelling' refers to checking out or thinking about someone.

I swallow a Gulp of my beer, " Fuck off Billy. There's no one."

" Bull shit there's no one. I'll even fuck you. You're a good-looking, successful smart ass. Who's the lady?"

I sip my beer again.  Do I tell Billy about Zoe? Or even Rachel. That I'm split between two beautiful, wonderful loving individuals who are pulling at a grown man's heart like two trackers in a game of tug-of-war.

" Just thinking of my mama."

"Bridgestone, I've known you my whole life. I know you better than you know you. That look isn't a 'I'm worried about my mama' look. It's an 'I got myself in trouble with a wildflower's papa' look.

I swallow my beer hard again. Billy has always had my back and right now I need an ally because it doesn't matter which way I turn this, I'm going to mess things up again and, as Billy says it, the cow's shit is going to spoil the water.

'You gotta promise on your mama and God, you say nothing. And I mean nothing, to know one." I said in a serious tone, looking straight into Billy's eyes. He looks at me in fear, "Did you kill someone?"

I shook my head, " No." I react to Billy's sarcastic remark.

Billy smiles, " Than man, it's fixable. Whatever it is. It's fixable."

I lean back and blow out the air from my lungs, " Yeah it is, but not without hurting someone's heart." I rub my face hard, knowing most likely it will be Rachel who will be hurt again, but this time, there's a five year old boy too. Fuck.

"Well, I'm here for you Jacob. Through shit and all." Billy said, looking sympathetic and attentive. He does the sign of the cross, "I promise on my Mama and God.

I lean my chest on the table towards Billy. I'm just going to say it, " I'm engaged."

It takes Billy a few seconds to register what I said, "Holy Shit! " Billy said, hitting the table, "Congratulations man!" Billy gets up and signals to me to do the same, " Let me give you a hug." Billy pulls me in and pats my back as I do the same to him. We sit again, " Shit. No wonder you're not smelling the wildflowers in here."

I smile at him. " No one Knows."

Billy stops the celebration and looks at me confuss, "Why the hell not?"

I start nervously, " Well, at first I didn't want to really let my girlfriends know where I came from."

Billy just looks at me, "Why not? We had the best childhood growing up. I mean I know you wanted out of here. I figured you were too big a personality for a small town life, but to ignore it, Jacob. Your Papa, your Mama, your sis —,"

" I know. I fucked up." I said feeling the guilt of all of it. "Time went by fast and before I knew it, three years went by. She's perfect and I proposed to her about Three months ago."

Billy nods, " Does this wildflower —, " I look at Billy when he refer to my fiancé as a wildflower. He clears his throat, " Does your lady have a name?'

I take a deep breath, " Ra — i mean Zoe." My eyes widen,

Billy leans back on his seat, " Well congratulations to you and Zoe. I'm happy for you man. You found someone to spend the rest of you breathing days with. Through all the chicken clatter and snow shits in life." Billy lifts his second beer towards me. I lift my half empty glass and we cheer. I finish my beer relive to finally be able to say it out loud. Now i just have to be able to say it to mama and Katie.

"So who's Ra —?" Billy interigates.

Shit. He caught that didn't he.

"The other reason I left home years ago. The one who now lives in my Mama's house and has a litltle boy of her own."

Billy smiles, "Rachel.'

My eyes open wild with shock, " I thought you hadn't been in town in months?"

" I haven't but it doesn't mean my Mama doesn't fill me in with what's going on there. She told me how lucky your Mama is to have little Rachel back into her life. She's the one who Katie babysat often and now she has a son. Am I getting the story right?"

" Why the fuck didn't you tell me that when i first came here!" I said kicking billy under the table.

He reacts to my kick and bends down to rub his leg, "Easy cowboy. I didn't think she meant anything to you. She's like, what, 4 - 5 years younger?"

"Four" I said space out.

"Why does she matter anyways. Is she hitting on you? Making moves to get into the Black Beauty?" Billy asks with a smirk and lifting his eyebrows up and down.

" No. She refuses to set foot in it. Plus I never wanted her in the truck. She isn't like that." I said thinking.

"Oh." Billy reacts.

I look at him, "What?"

"She's the one, years ago, you defended when I called her a wildflower. I remember her. Especially when her braces came off and the glasses, her hips, butt and lumps all grown out, so much so that I —"

I kick Billy again, "Don't talk about her like that!" I growl.

Billy nurses his second injury and looks at me, " Yeah I see the mess you're in."

I signal a waitress for another beer.

"What can I get you, handsome ?"

" Four beers and an ice pack please." I said looking at Billy.

"Sure." the waitress said, walking off.

Billy sits up again. " So how are you planning to fix this love triangle that you created?" Billy asks in a low voice.

I look at him, " I don't know. I don't want to hurt her." I said out loud, lost in my thoughts.

"Which 'her' are you referring too?" Billy asks.

I look at him, "Rachel. I mean, it's been years and she still hates me for what I did to her. I can tell. She snaps me like a twing at any second, and I live in the city. I'm a city guy now and she's... raising her son with small town values. She wouldn't leave and I'm not coming back."

"You should have told your Mama about Zoe, back then. You know small town folks talk and it would have reached Rachel. At least you wouldn't have been in front of her to see her reaction or your sister and Mama. Now. Now you have no choice but to face them, eye to eye."

I look at Billy. He's right. The escape that I thought I had from PineBrook was just a facade. I can never leave it because it's in my roots. And now the life I create,  away from here, is about to collide with my past and family.

"Yeah I guess I'm going to have to face it." I said chugging back my first of two beers in front of me.

"Maybe invite your fiancé to PineBrook. Meet your Mama, Katie and the family." Billy suggests.

"and Rachel." I add.

Billy presses his lips tight, "I'm not sure what hold Rachel has on you. But I'm guessing enough to make this introduction very hard for you."

I look Billy in the eyes with no emotions. I'm not ready to share my past relationship with Rachel right now. No one needs to know that and it looks like Rachel kept her end of the deal because no one confronted me about her, "She's been so good to Mama and Katie and is practically family. I'm sure she'll have her opinion too."

Billy looks at me and smiles, "So, Jacob John Bridgestone is hooked and tied down"

I smile as I catch Billy's attempt to change the topic. I lean back on my seat, taking a deep breath, " Yeah can you believe it." I say.

" So what's Zoe like? How did you meet her?" Billy asks, followed by a gulp of his beer.

I smile, " We met three years ago at a mutual friend's pool party. She's confident, bold, has style, she keeps me in line." I laugh, "She's fearless in her career, she's driven to succeed and knows what she wants and gets it."

Billy nods his head, " Sounds like a boss woman, and a busy one too."

" We're both busy. Flipping homes and the demands I deal with with projects, real estate agents, contractors, deliveries and my list goes on. So we have an understanding that we are driven individuals. But we have gone on trips together. Paris, Spin, Germany, Italy, Dubi and in two weeks, Zoe's fashion line will be on display in France."

Billy moves his head in circles, " Woah, that got me dizzy just you listing the names."

I grab my last beer, "Like I said, I need someone as successful as I am. I can't have someone home, waiting for me. Getting mad because I miss dinners or plan date nights cancelled because I'm waiting for an order or working late at a house getting close to the deadline."

" Oh I get it. Life can get in the way." Billy says, "But don't forget to live your life too. Have fun."

I second Billy's words of wisdom,  lifting my beer in front of him, " Amen to my best friend. I missed you, William B Gordon." I said taping Billy's glass of beer on mine.

" I love you Bridgestone." We both finish our beer and call for another round.

*****

I squint my eyes with the sunlight shining in my bedro—, Matty's bedroom. I feel a pool of Drool on my pillow. My mouth is pasty and dry. My head is pounding and the smell of beer is in my brain. God, I haven't gotten drunk in so long. Zoe keeps us on a no drinking excessively due to our status in our professions. Especially her fashion sector. Zoe's name is already out there and soon mine will as Zoe is working on the two of us collaborating in the Home Decor sector.

"Uncle Jacob." I smile, hearing a whisper, which amplifies inside my skull. I l tilt my head to follow the voice. It's  Matty. I can see his longish copper curls in my peripheral view.
   
"Hey, little man. Did you need something?" I whisper.

"We're going in the pool. Auntie Katie and Uncle Gilbert are coming over now and granny Jane is going to go in the thing you built."

I smile at the mini-report I'm getting from little man, "Okay. I'll be down in a minute. Ah, can you ask your Mama to make me a ginger tea please?"

Matty pats my shoulder, " I gotch ya." And climbs off the bed causing trimmers in my body.

God. I'm Never drinking again.

"Good morning sleepyhead." Katie sings as I walk into the kitchen.

I see my tea on the table, "Good morning sis." I moan as I sit in the chair rubbing my face and hair.

"Drinking like we're 20 years old again, huh?" Katie asks, smiling leaning on the kitchen counter.

"No, just out with an old friend," I report still rubbing my face.

"Hum, Willy?"  Katie continues with the 20 questions.

"No Billy,"  I say grabbing the hot mug.

"Ahhh. I should have known." I didn't say anything, "Just like old times?" 

"Not quite. I wouldn't have felt the hangover as much." 

Katie laughs, " Well I bet a good swim in the cool pool water will help. Come everyone's in the pool. " Katie says as she walks by lightly but painfully patting my head.

I follow my sister and we walk to the gated pool. I grab my sister's sunglasses, "Thank you." 

"I'll let you have them since you're the one with the hangover."

"Shhh. Mama doesn't need to know." I say as I put Katie's sunglasses on. I look up at everyone. It's a beautiful hot mid-afternoon. Gilbert was in the pool with Matty and Gavin. Charlotte and Declan playing some kind of jumping game.

"Mama. Are you ready to go in?"  Katie yells beside me.

I squeeze my eyes together from her, 'oh so loud,' voice that penetrates through my skull to my brain. I look over to Mama and Rachel setting the wheelchair by the pool. My heart skips a beat as Rachel takes her dress off revealing a simple dark blue bikini, but her body was tight and fit. A couple of abs sculpted on her abdomen. Her breasts are not as big as Zoe's, but Zoe's are not real. She had them done before we met, but Rachel's are a nice size for being natural.

"isn't Ray the best? She's been so good for Mama." Katie says.

"Yeah. It's nice of her to be here." I say quickly.

"She's single, you know," Katie adds.

"Katie," I say

"What? I'm just letting you know. She's not a little girl anymore and Matty is adorable and really likes you. And you can have your instant family before you have your own together."

I roll my eyes as I sit on the lounge chair watching Rachel slowly slide into the pool beside Mama and react to the cool water. So does her breasts. I found myself unable to look away. Matty didn't take too long not to start splashing his mama which made watching Rachel getting wet, all the better. It's okay to look. Right?  I mean, I'm not saying anything or commenting. Just looking. it wouldn't hurt anyone. Right?.
"Hey little brother."  Katie sits on the lounge chair beside me. I lay my towel over my crotch to hide what's going on there.  "Why don't you put your towel on the ground? It's hot."
"No." I jump nervous, "It's okay. I'll keep it here until I jump in." Dear god, I hope my sister doesn't pull the towel off me.
"Suit yourself. I'm jumping in now." Katie said walking off. She went over to Mama and Rachel. I take this moment to watch everyone enjoying themselves. This makes me feel good.