"So many parents,
Are basically their children's first Bully.
The first ones to remind us that we are
FAT,
Too SKINNY,
Too DARK,
Hair is NAPPY...
Parents pick on their kids
and disguise it
as
TOUGH LOVE."

- SYNTHEA

Song:
Know That You're Good Enough by Lillian Hepler

****

"Congratulations Sweetie!" Mom squeals joyfully, giving an award-winning proud smile.

I smile, nodding in response.

My acceptance letter came today and I feel the world closing in on me. Mom cried for hours.

"Chelsea, I'm proud of you. Your hard work finally paid off." Dad says, as mom scoops some pasta onto his plate.

It's no surprise I got accepted into Oxford University for Bachelor's in medicine. I had one choice, that's to pass.

Gwyneth and Josh McAndrews are celebrated surgeons at the top of their fields. Chase and I have heard enough to know we're following their footsteps. Become amazing surgeons like them.

Chase is halfway there, finished his four years Bachelor's degree, starting medical school next month, September.

My DNA wasn't to fail.

Spent the last few years anticipating college. Even weekends, I'm reading, memorizing and digesting textbooks for medical school. While my mates were out partying, wasting away getting drunk, loosing their virginities. Basically jeopardizing their futures. I studied, hours and hours in between breakdowns just for the perfect grades.

One slip, my future is ruined.

"I'll miss having you around everyday." I smile, shoveling forkful of pasta into my mouth. "My little girl soon to be a medical student. My only daughter." She wipes her eyes.

I swear my parents, mostly mom, practically farts rainbows whenever they brag about us. Mom Googles 'Surgeon Family Photoshoots' inspirations. Hoping for 'cute family picture' of us in our matching scrubs one day.

If I'm honest with myself, I don't even want to be a surgeon. Hell, I don't want to start school again for this year. Maybe backpack through Europe but I'm too timid to say anything. They put much pressure on me to be perfect, It's exhausting.

Sucks to be me.

It's hard trying to live up as McAndrews. 'You aren't wearing that, are you?' 'Chelsea, you could've done better...' 'As McAndrews, you shouldn't do.....' Few of the subtle jabs I heard growing up because I always fell short.

"If only you had won award for best graduating student." Mom pours wine in their cups.

Nothing I do is ever good enough!

Putting my fork down, I instantly sign. "I want to defer my admission to next year."

Creepily in sync, their heads swing over to me. Trying not to sink into my seat. "What does that mean?" Mom put down her wine, narrowing her eyes, almost staring into my soul.

"To travel aroun-"

"I know what you mean! When did you start thinking this preposterous idea of a joke?" Feeling her getting angrier every passing second, dad's face is unreadable.

"I have enough money saved up to pay for it all by myself." I give them pleading look.

Mom sighs, as if praying for patience to deal with me. "Getting a degree is more important than traveling. You've plenty time to travel after med school. No one returns to school after taking a year off."

"I've never wanted to go to med school or be a surgeon!" Her eyes hardens as I sign rapidly. Tears well up in my eyes, I wipe them away quickly.

Her jaw rest open on the floor, she blinks. "Of course you're going to medical school! It has always been your wish to be a surgeon!"

"No!!!"

Mom might passout any moment as pain covers her face.

"After everything, I find you being, dare I say it, an ungrateful child." Dad speaks.

'People couldn't careless for someone with your condition'

'You're handicapped'

'You should be happy we're here for you'

'You're mute!'

My chest is tight. I'm having difficulty breathing.

Everything hurts!

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Caffeine Rush

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