"Do I really have to do this?"

Even after asking that question a million times and receiving multiple answers, I still felt like I was not ready for the video call. There was some kind of fear.

A strange feeling.

You know, the kind of feeling that makes your heart beat faster and the stomach tie itself into knots? I always hated it when it happened because it gave me unnecessary feelings of anxiety and nausea, and made me think perhaps something bad was about to occur.

The bigger question I had for myself was — why did I even feel this way? I mean, it was just a video call. Not a war. What bad could possibly happen through it?

Was I afraid of yet another marriage interview? Obviously not. After all, it was nothing new for me. I was more experienced than a professional actress acting such scenes in a movie or play. In fact, at this point, I considered it my area of expertise.

So, then what else could it be? Perhaps it was the tech part of it. Because mind you, I was not one of those tech-savvy people even though my coworkers considered me to be one. Maybe I was just nervous about messing things up with an online call.

I wasn't sure.

"Just relax, Lish. It's going to be fine. You will do well and they will like you," said Daneen, interrupting my thoughts. As always, she was choosing a dress for me to wear. She had no idea how I was truly feeling about this whole thing. Nobody did. I kept it that way.

"Okay, I think this one's good," she said, handing over a black Shalwar to me. "It will make you look a bit smaller," she added.

What a joke!

If my family believed that a dress could hide my real size and get me married off, then they were absolutely wrong. It wasn't that easy to conceal all these extra flesh.

Anyway, I did not say anything. I simply got dressed up, combed my hair and wore the shawl in such a way that my head and chest was covered well. Although that was my usual way of doing things, today I decided to be extra careful with it.

By 4:15 pm I was ready. Shaheen came to the room and said, "We don't have to share your WhatsApp number. Let's use mine."

I replied, "Sure."

"Is the call going to be via phone or PC?" asked Daneen.

"Phone would do, right? They did not say anything in particular. Let mom and dad introduce themselves first and then Alisha can continue," said Shaheen.

"Yeah, that would do," I said.

While I waited for the call, I grabbed my phone and tried posing in different angles to pick the best option for the video call. Only the 45-degree selfie angle with my cheek forward looked flattering, that too on my better side. Yes, I had a good side as well as a bad side and often the left-cheek bias won.

However, I knew I would look ridiculous if I posed that way for a marriage interview call, so I thought of following the boomers' guide to posing. You know, the one where old uncles and aunties on their Facebook profile pictures stare straight at the camera? Yup, that was what I decided on. It fit the bill.

"So, you are going to have the call in the room, right?" asked Aira. I wasn't sure whether she really had that doubt or wanted to just make conversation. After all, she had not uttered a single word about the proposal and her silence was definitely making things look more awkward.

"Of course" I replied.

"No, I don't think so. It's not very bright here. Why don't you put a chair in the verandah and talk to them?" asked Shaheen. The other marriage scientist Daneen agreed.

"But it's raining outside. What if she gets struck by a lightning?" asked Zoya with an eye-roll. It didn't look like she was raising a genuine concern but rather making a sneering remark at the elder sisters' efforts.

"Aiyo Zoya! It's not heavy rain. There won't be any lightning," replied Daneen snappishly.

"Whatever. If finding a husband for Alisha is more important than her life for you all, then go ahead and do it. None of my concern," said Zoya in response, shrugging her shoulders.

"Yeah, not your concern. Please keep your mouth shut. Maybe the next time I see you using the phone when it's raining, I will confiscate it because I wouldn't want to see you getting struck by a lightning," said Daneen.

The rest of us in the room burst into laughter listening to their conversation. Those two were often at war with each other during such occasions and it was funny.

"What do you say? Verandah is fine, right?" asked Shaheen, coming back to her point.

I did not respond. Since I preferred staying in the room, I was still thinking over it. That was when dad walked in.

"Is my daughter ready?" he asked. I nodded with a smile.

A fake smile just to make him happy.

I generally did that for him. Unlike with mom, I had a strong bond with dad and perhaps this was why even when I felt upset, I often pretended to be happy around him. I didn't want to worry him in any way.

"I hope you whole-heartedly agreed for this," he said and I nodded once again. This time it was hard to even fake a smile.

He then added, "Don't worry. Pray for the best and go face it. It's just a call. It doesn't determine anything. You can always make your decision after speaking to him."

Even though my sisters and mom had already spoken a few similar lines to me, it truly hit home only when dad said it. He sounded quite emotional. I guess, like everyone else he too maybe wanted me to ace this marriage interview and be done with it but at the same time, he also truly cared for my opinion. At least it felt like that.

And that made me make up my mind at that moment. I mean, how could I disappoint him? I had to at least try, right?

So, I agreed to sit in the verandah and take the call, solely for dad. If not for anyone, I'd do this for him, I thought. It wasn't much. But it was some extra effort to make this work.

It was 4:30 pm. Shaheen's phone rang. My heart skipped a beat.

I was about to leave the room when I heard mom and dad greeting whoever that was on the other end with a pleasant 'Salam'. I decided to stay there until my turn came. Meanwhile, I wanted to observe the call as a third person. My sisters and brothers-in-law too did the same from different corners of the house.

Though the call was on loudspeaker mode, we did not hear anyone from the other end speaking. Only dad's words were heard and it really didn't sound like a two-way communication at all. It looked like he was trying hard to speak on different topics just to keep the conversation going.

Was the bald guy and his mother mute? I wondered.

Even after five minutes, when the same vibes continued, Aira suggested that perhaps there was a connectivity issue and maybe that's why nothing was heard from the other end. Seemed like a valid point. So, her husband went to check on it. But we found that the internet was working perfectly fine on Shaheen's phone.

Then someone else suggested that the kids must turn off the TV in the hall because maybe the high volume of their cartoon affected the call in some way. It was such a lame reason but hey, that kind of behavior was pretty normal for my family on days like this. And so, the TV was switched off but no good came off that either.

What really was the problem? Nobody knew.

Finally, I was asked to come. When I went out and took the phone from mom and dad, I realized that they weren't very impressed with their meeting. At least their faces did not look happy.

I sat down, held the phone straight and oh my! I did not like what I saw. Not even a bit.

Oh by the way, I wasn't referring to the guy or his mother when I said that. I was talking about myself. My face looked so huge and I looked terrible on video. Yikes!

As for the other party...well, for starters, the guy was completely bald. He looked like he belonged to that neither-fat-nor-thin category. And he had a scornful look on his face. His mother had a blank expression.

I smiled and greeted them. The mother greeted back in a low voice but he did not do even do that. Then I waited for them to continue the conversation but no effort came from their side. So, unlike before, there was not even a one-way communication now. We were all just staring at the screen like sociopaths. Did not even introduce ourselves.

Total weirdo vibes.

"Ask her any question that you want," said his mother to him after some time.

"What is there to ask, mama?" he replied disdainfully.

"Well, idiot. If you had nothing to speak, why would you even call?" I badly wanted to ask him that but I reserved my words. I was super annoyed by his behavior.

"Why don't you say something then?" This time, his mother directed the question towards me.

"Uh..so, I'm Alisha and I work as a senior executive at a BPO firm," I said. Not a very impressive introduction but hey, I was still better than him.

"This is my son, Ibrahim. He works at the State Engineering Corporation," his mother replied. Wow! His self-introduction was made by someone else for him. What a baby!

"You work in the private sector, is it?" she asked.

"Yeah," I replied, unable to understand the purpose of that useless question.

"Oh. Not a government job. No pension after retirement then," she said in a disappointed tone. I did not even know how to respond to such a stupid statement.

Were they looking for a bride or a life-settlement plan?

After another awkward silence, Ibrahim whispered something to his mother and she asked, "Do you have Skype? I mean, can you make the call via a computer?" I didn't know where this was going.

"Ermm..I-I don't have a Skype account," I replied.

"Can you at least check with someone else at home, ma? We can't see you properly through your phone screen, that's why," she said.

Oh. I got it. They wanted to check my real size. Ibrahim's silence was probably because of this. I guess, he wanted to waste his precious words only on a girl that he thought was of the right weight and height.

"Okay, I will check and call you back," I said and hung up immediately. I did not even plan to call back. I said that only for the sake of common courtesy. I mean, I already knew this was not going to work. So, obviously there was no point in wasting each other's time, right?

I went inside and handed over the phone to Shaheen. They all asked me why I hung up so abruptly. I explained everything and even after hearing it all, my pathetic family still wanted to give it a try on Skype. So, they shared my brother-in-law Ahamed's Skype ID with Ibrahim's mom.

Apparently, Ibrahim was 'shy and introverted'. That was the reason why he could not speak so easily. His mother had told that to my naive parents and they totally bought it. It looked like the entire family believed in that theory, except for Aira and Zoya. Perhaps those two were the only smart members in my family, other than me.

After setting up everything on a laptop in the verandah, I was asked to be part of yet another dumb call. This time, I took Aira's daughter Dalia with me.

She was sunshine personified, beaming around with her cheerfulness and endless words wherever she went. So, if those idiots did not speak to me, I could at least use her company, I thought.

The moment I sat, the screen froze. I always hated video calls on a computer for this reason. They never worked without crashing.

I waited for the damn thing to work and finally, after a lot of interruptions, the screen was back to normal. It did get blurry and pixelated from time to time.

I introduced my niece to Ibrahim and his mother and expected them to speak a few words with her because that's what normal people would do around kids but somehow they both showed no interest at all. In fact, they acted like she was not even there. Poor Dalia moved her gaze back and forth from my face to the screen, not knowing what exactly was going on.

Again, Ibrahim remained silent for the most part and it was his mother doing the talking. However, after a while, he opened his mouth and asked me a question, which made me think perhaps he wasn't that bad and maybe I misjudged him. After all, he was talking about my favorite topic.

"Do you like food?"

"Yes," I replied with a smile.

"Maybe you like it a little too much, isn't it? I mean, look at you. You are so fat. You know that, right?" he asked.

I was wrong. He was rude and there was nothing good about him. I judged him right the first time.

I kept quiet. I decided to ignore his comment.

"What's your weight?" He again asked a harsh question. This time I responded.

"I'm sorry, I'm not comfortable with answering that."

"Of course, I know how you feel. I've been there myself" he said. I had no idea where this was going or what he was trying to imply.

Was this his idea of having a friendly conversation?

"See, I was once a fat person just like you but with my hard work I lost all that extra pounds. This is why I'm telling you, you should control your food. Don't eat too much." His mother added, "Yes, don't eat a lot."

Well, I guess I preferred him being silent. Now, he spoke way too much. And it was annoying!

What I couldn't understand though was how a person who had gone through fat shaming himself could utter the same nasty comments to another? Did he not know how bad it made me feel?

Dalia tried to ask me something but I hushed her. I wasn't in a mood to answer anything. I was feeling tensed because of all that fat shaming Ibrahim did.

I only nodded at him and he spoke again.

"And I think you have a very lazy lifestyle. Maybe you go to office, sit around all day and get home and sleep. Am I right? You should be more active. See, even now you look lazy."

Seriously, what was wrong with him? He was fat shaming me more than anyone I knew. Perhaps he wanted to inspire me with his story and tips but it was an epic fail. It only made me feel frustrated.

I kept thinking of how I could end this call when something so unexpected happened. Dalia started her series of questions. She spoke so fast that I could not even stop her.

"Lish aunty, why does this man look weird? Why does he have no hair? He looks like Humpty-Dumpty, right—" Ibrahim and his mother started frowning at little Dalia.

Before either of them could say anything, I quickly hung up and signed out of Skype.

Today was a disaster!

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Thoughts on Ibrahim? 🤔
~~~

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