" 'She's got these scars on her wrists. Did you see 'em? Wonder what they're from...' "

I couldn't stand it. I couldn't stand myself. Couldn't stand the fact that I had let someone find out one of my secrets. And I was scared. So fucking scared that someone would find something more.

At last tripping on a tree root, I let myself crumble to the ground with no intention of picking myself back up again. Sobs wracked my body as I reached into the pocket of my jeans jacket for my blade. My hand came back empty.

A pit began to grow in my stomach as the realization hit me. I'd left it at home, not thinking I would need it that day since I would be hanging with the Curtis gang.

That would turn out to be the only time I'd ever make that mistake for the rest of my life.

I was hysterical at that point, tears flowing down my cheeks like a waterfall. To no avail, I tried to scratch my arms in a final attempt to feel some sort of relief. Finally, I let myself fall back into the trunk of the tree, curling into myself in defeat.

That night, I fell asleep staring up at the sky, wishing only for it to descend and swallow me up.

. . .
3rd Person
. . .

That night, Sodapop had turned to watch the TV show for what seemed like only a couple minutes, and when he'd turned back, Penny was gone. The rest of the gang had not seen her leave either, and to say he was worried would be an understatement.

Darrel had prevented him from going to search for her, entertaining the idea that she had more than likely gone home. "I'm sure she's fine," he'd said.

But Sodapop was not convinced, especially not after his earlier conversation with the girl. He was concerned for her. She gave off a vibe that was almost too difficult for him to read. It was withdrawn and sad and tired, and he was worried.

He convinced himself, however, that his older brother was right. She'd obviously just gone home and he was overthinking things. There was nothing to worry about. Yet he couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong.

The next morning, Sodapop was up bright and early to get ready for work. Steve had slept over at the Curtis's house in order to make getting to work easier, so Sodapop wouldn't have to come pick him up. They hit the road as quickly as possible, not wanting to be late to the DX.

But their plan was foiled much sooner than they ever would have expected. While driving along their usually route to work, they passed by the park where Sodapop spotted a figure slumped against a tree, fast asleep.

"Wait a second," Sodapop said from the passenger seat, a look of confusion crossing his features. "Was that Penny?"

Steve scoffed. "I know you're in love with her, but imagining her everywhere can't be healthy."

Sodapop shot is friend a dirty look, but decided against acknowledging what Steve had said. "I'm serious Steve, that looked like Penny. Turn around, just to make sure."

"Come on, Soda." Steve sighed. "I don't want to be late for work."

"It will only take a second, Stevie. Please," Sodapop pleaded.

Steve took a deep breath. "Fine. A really quick look and then we're back on our way, okay?" He began to turn the car around.

"Yes, thank you." Sodapop let out a sigh of relief. He was tense as they once more approached the tree where the figure sat.

"Holy shit, that's her, Steve," Sodapop cried frantically, eyes wide. "What the hell is she doing sleeping under that tree? Steve, stop the goddamn car!"

Steve cursed and slammed on his breaks, but Sodapop was already jumping out of the car. Steve followed closely behind.

They slowed down as they approached her. She was asleep against the tree, legs curled up against her chest in a position that couldn't have been comfortable. As Sodapop got closer, he was able to see how puffy and red her eyes were. It was obvious she'd been crying, but by the looks of the dried tear stains running down her cheeks, it had to have been last night.

"Jeez, what happened?" Steve asked, as if expecting someone to answer. "What do we do?"

Sodapop let out a breath, attempting to calm his racing heart. "Let's take her back to my place. She'll be safer there."

"Yeah," Steve said, breathlessly. "Yeah, that's a good idea."

Sodapop stepped forward, gently scooping up the sleeping girl into his arms. As he walked her back to the car, he was able to get a good look at her face. The crying had been heavy, but it didn't look like she'd been beaten, which was a good sign. No one had gotten to her last night. But she still looked so tired. The dark circles under her eyes were scarily apparent, and it seemed as though it had been a long, rough night for her.

Steve helped Sodapop settle her into the car and they were on their way to the Curtis's house. The idea of work had left their minds long ago, and the only thing either could think about was getting their friend somewhere safe and comfortable.

When Sodapop walked through the front door with Penny in his arms, his older brother was on him in a second. "What's going on?" Darrel asked, walking out of the kitchen, eyes landing on the girl in Sodapop's arms. "What the hell happened?"

"We don't know," Sodapop said, placing the girl gently onto the couch. Possibilities were running wildly through his head, but he had no idea what had happened to her. She appeared to be fine, but why would she have been crying out in the park alone?

Darrel ran a hand through his hair, sighing deeply. "Alright, well she'd better stay here. We can ask her what happened when she wakes up," he finished just as Dallas and Two-Bit waltz through the door.

"Good morning Curtis residents!" Two-Bit called cheerfully before quickly being shushed.

"Shut up, Two-Bit," Steve spoke quietly. "Penny's asleep."

"What the hell do you mean?" Dallas asked. He was getting a little riled up. "She walked out last night, didn't she? What's she doing crashing here?"

Sodapop shook his head. "I'm sure she had her reasons for leaving. We found her asleep in the park, Dal. We don't know what's going on." In all honesty, although he was curious, it didn't matter why Penny had left the night before. As long as she was okay now, everything would be fine.

"Alright, well you can't just leave her shoes and her jacket on, you dumbasses," Two-Bit said, much quieter than before. He gazed over at Penny's sleeping form on the couch. "That can't be comfortable for her."

"Right, someone help me then." Darrel made his way over to the resting girl on the couch, beginning to untie her shoes before placing them neatly by the door. Two-Bit followed, gently pulling her jeans jacket off. He paused momentarily to stare at the girl, eyes furrowing slightly in concern. He shook his head however, and let the emotion quickly slip from his face before following after Darrel to hang her jacket up.

"Let's keep an eye on her and hope she wakes up soon," Darrel said as the two rejoined the group of boys. "We can question her later. For now, how about I make everyone breakfast?"

Steve and Sodapop had already eaten, but they were more than grateful to skip work. And even more grateful that Darrel didn't mention it.

. . .

Hours ticked by slower than ever as the boys waited in relative silence, each of their minds running wild with different theories. Everyone was worried sick at the idea that something horrible had happened to her.

Sodapop couldn't help replaying his most recent conversation with her. How had she kept such a big secret locked away for so long without going crazy? Why was she too scared to tell anyone? And why did she always seem so sad?

It was one of the first things he'd noticed about her when they'd met, and one of the main things that drew him to her. Penny was one big secret that he couldn't unravel. Yet more than anything, he wanted to figure her out.

"She's waking up!" Sodapop was shaken violently from his thoughts by Johnny's urgent words.

The gang jumped up from their places around the kitchen table, rushing to Penny's side by the couch. They watched as her eyes fluttered open softly, squinting as she tried to focus on the faces bearing over her. "What the hell?" she said, slowly attempting to sit up.

"You're awake," Sodapop found himself saying, eyes glued to the confused girl before him.

She blinked tiredly, placing her hands over her eyelids in an attempt to rub the sleep from her eyes. "Yeah. What happ..." She cut herself short, eyes widening like saucers as she seemed to recall something.

Darrel spoke up, voicing his concern. "Penny, why were you sleeping in the park?"

Penny was silent for a moment, ignoring his question almost, before she let her eyes fall down to her clasped hands on her lap. Flinching violently at the sight of them, she recoiled suddenly against the couch as if she'd been shocked.

"Where's my jacket?" Her voice shook as she spoke, eyes flicking between each of the boys before her. Out of pure shock at her outburst, they stayed silently, only staring at her with wide eyes. Her voice was more forceful and urgent as she repeated herself. "Guys, where's my jacket!"

"By the door," Steve finally said, confused. "Penny, what's wrong?"

Ignoring him, she jumped up from the couch, rushing to the coat hook where her jacket hung stiffly. Grabbing it, she shrugged it on, visibly relaxing as the fabric slipped over her arms.

"Penny, listen to me," Darrel said, voice filled with concern as he stared at the girl. "What happened last night?"

Penny took a deep breath to steady herself before she spoke, eyes cast downward. "I-I didn't want to sleep at home and I didn't know where else I could go." She stammered as the words fell from her mouth.

"You could have stayed here with us!" Sodapop exclaimed quickly.

Penny's eyes flicked up to meet his. "Look, I'm really sorry about last night. I didn't mean to disappear on you guys and scare you. Really," she said, eyes filled with regret. "I wasn't in the right state of mind last night and I just needed to get away from everything."

The gang nodded, accepting her words. But Sodapop found himself with a pit of guilt building in his stomach. He couldn't help the feeling that she'd meant him when she said she needed to get away from things.

"Nothing happened though, right?" Dallas asked, wanting her to make it clear to them that she hadn't been jumped that night.

Her eyes dulled for a second as she spoke. "Nothing."

The boys finally let themselves relax at her words. Nothing had happened. She was fine.

"Thank you guys for helping me out this morning by taking me back here," Penny said, once again letting her eyes fall to the floor. She scuffed her foot lightly against the floor. "I should be getting home now though. I've been gone for too long and my mom will be worrying."

It was a valid excuse, and the gang fell for it just as easily as she'd hoped they would. "No problem, Penny. Tell you're mom we say hi," Darrel responded.

"Will do," she said, flashing them a small smile. She was out the door and gone before anyone else could speak.

The boys stood silently where they were for a moment before settling themselves down on the couches.

Sodapop was the first to speak. "Did anyone else think that was really weird?"

After a second of thought, Steve shook his head. "I don't think there's anything to worry about. She just seemed a little skittish, that's all. She's okay."

"Yeah, she's fine. Probably just confused since she woke up in a different place," Dallas said as he leaned back casually in his arm chair.

Two-Bit sat silently on the carpet, eyebrows furrowed deeply as he thought. Ponyboy seemed to be the only one who noticed his odd expression. "Everything okay, Two?"

Everyone's eyes turned to Two-Bit, who's expression hadn't changed. He took a moment longer to think.

"Two-Bit?"

Finally, he met the eyes of the rest of the gang. "She's got these scars on her wrists. Did you see 'em? Wonder what they're from..."