JUNGKOOK

"HEY, JUNGCOCK!"

Jungkook groaned at the voice.

"It's those jerks again," Min grumbled.

"Yeah, I know. Just keep walking."

But they didn't stop.

Jungkook barely had time to react when an arm gripped his shoulder and spun him around.

Youngjae smirked. "We miss you, dude. Come back."

"No thanks," he said with a scowl.

"Come on, Jungcock," Junho said.

"Stop calling me that!" Jungkook snapped. "I never liked or agreed to that nickname before!"

"And as far as I know," Min chimed in with crossed arms, "the only cocks I know of are the sounds made by two chickens named Youngjae and Junho."

Junho scoffed. "Were we even talking to you?"

Her eyes grew wide as she swung her backpack to her side and unzipped it, seeming to be trying to find something. "Darn it." She zipped it back up and swung it behind her shoulders. "Sorry. I was trying to find if I had any fucks to give but forgot I had ran out a long time ago."

"I'd be careful if I was a smart ass like you," warned Youngjae.

"Leave her out of this," Jungkook cut in. "Listen, for the last time, I don't want to be a part of your group anymore. I only hung out with you to look cool, but I'm better than that now. I don't need you."

Youngjae narrowed his eyes at him. "This is the last time we're going to be nice to you, JK. Chase the prey or be the prey. Which is it?"

"I hope," Jungkook said coldly, "the next time we see each other you won't see me as a friend anymore."

He took Min's hand and walked away. He didn't want to look back. No matter what they said he told himself to stay strong.

Easier said than done.

"You'll regret it!" Youngjae shouted. "Just like that night! Just like that guy you fucked up! We're the only ones who know!"

Jungkook halted at that. He knew he was giving them exactly what they wanted, but he didn't care.

"Oppa, they're not worth it," Min said.

But Jungkook wasn't having it.

He spun around, stormed over to Youngjae, and collided his fist with his cheek. Youngjae stumbled back in surprise, hand automatically reaching up to his red cheek.

"Fuck you!" Jungkook cursed.

People passing by in the hallway slowed down their pace and lingered around the three boys. It started out as a murmur made by one person, but then it spread like a plague. It continued to work its way around until everyone was shouting, "Fight! Fight! Fight!"

The injured boy glared back at him. "You'll regret that."

Filled with rage, he lunged at Jungkook and swung his arm to strike, but Min interfered so fast that both boys didn't have any time to realize what just happened until the damage was already done.

The crowd around fell silent. A moment later and everyone realized what had happened.

Min shot Youngjae the look of death as she wiped the blood from her mouth. "My grandfather gave me more painful hugs than that weak excuse for a punch you just gave me."

Jungkook panicked. "Oh my God! Min, are you okay?"

She didn't acknowledge him.

Youngjae's cries filled the air as she grabbed his hand and judo flipped him.

The crowd roared with cheers, but when Min asked, "What? The rest of you want some of this, too?" everyone scurried away.

To make matters worse, the person Jungkook least wanted to see was gripping the collar of Junho's shirt.

"What is the meaning of this?" Namjoon asked.

"He was going to hit, Jungkook-oppa!"

Namjoon narrowed his eyes at Min as he tapped his foot on the floor of the nurse's office and crossed his arms. "You were being stupid."

"I'm fine, by the way! Thanks!"

He only sighed.

It was true that they grew closer as siblings ever since the accident, but that didn't mean they had the same point of views at times.

"You are fine," Namjoon assured her. "And those boys are going to get their asses kicked for touching you later. They're already dealing with the principal right now. But we're talking about you at the moment."

Min rolled her eyes as she moved the ice package closer to the corner of her mouth. "Yeah, I get it, Dad. What I did was stupid. But what else could I have done?"

"You could have intervened in many different ways that didn't involve a punch. You could have pushed either Jungkook or Youngjae out of the way or simply just not have intervened at all."

She stared at him in astonishment. "And let him take the hit? Are you serious?"

"He's right," Jungkook said, shifting on one the nurse's beds. "You should have let me take the hit, Min. I've handled far worse. Plus, I started the fight."

"No, you didn't! It was those jerks!" Min defended.

"But he threw the first punch," Namjoon argued.

"For God's sake, Namjoon! Will you shut up?" Min finally snapped in anger.

Jungkook got anxiety, watching as Namjoon's calm expression visibly dissipated so quickly it was almost as if it was never there. His eyes flared as he clenched his jaw, giving off a hostile aura. He looked like a time bomb that was ready to go off at any second.

He opened his mouth to probably spit words that were equivalent to a grenade, but Jungkook beat him to it.

"Both of you, stop it!" Jungkook hissed.

They both averted their attention to him.

He stood up. "It's no one's fault but mine, okay? I'm the one who screwed up! I threw the first punch. It was all me! So stop fighting with each other because of what I did! Remember, you guys are all you have! You can't afford to waste time arguing when clearly you should be pointing fingers at me! I already get enough of people blaming each other at home! Be lucky that you have each other!"

He didn't wait for a response from them before he walked out, the guilt following after him. He walked up to the rooftop of the school, not caring if he was missing class.

He hated himself so much, more than he thought he should. It was funny how the person he hates the most is the person he has to live with for the rest of his life. Himself.

He felt like all he was doing was causing trouble.

He felt bad because when Min went to the nurse, he and the three other boys (including Namjoon) had to go to the principal's office. Namjoon's cleverness of words got them both out of being suspended. Because of him and his wittiness they both were let off with a warning, even though Namjoon didn't do anything wrong.

"Hey, kid," came an all too familiar voice.

Jungkook spun around to face Namjoon, who had a blank expression and his hands in his pockets.

"Oh, hey," was all he said back.

Namjoon walked over to the railing and rested his elbows on the metal next to him, looking nowhere but up at the clouds.

"Life's fucked up for you, too, isnt it? You know, with your family and your uncle and now this."

Jungkook looked down at his aching knuckles, feelings his eyes string.

"Yeah," he muttered quietly.

"Listen," he said, "just because your life is fucked up, doesn't mean you're the one fucking everything up."

"Then why does it feel that way?" whispered Jungkook.

"Because that's just what happens. You feel like you're all alone, like no one wants you and people will be better off without you. But it won't and deep down you know it."

The tears came as soon as the younger boy opened his mouth. "I-It's just s-so hard, hyung. Sometimes it fe-feels li-like it wi-will never get better. A-And Min and Y-Yoongi-hyung and Uncle Jin and m-my dog are th-the o-only things th-that are helping me th-through this ha-hard time."

"Jungkook, I can assure you it will only get better."

He turned to meet Namjoon's eyes. "How do you know? Ho-How could you po-possibly know?"

"Because I've hit rock bottom before. And once you've hit rock bottom you can't go any further down. You can only go up. It's the same as climbing a mountain. Once you've worked your way up, the only other way is down. It happens. But once you're at the bottom of the hill, you'll be able to see the top of it. Then you can start climbing."

"Wh-What if it's a steep hill? What if I get tired of cl-climbing?"

"That's the importance of having people around you who'll stick by you. Because when you get tired they'll be there to carry you up until you're stronger."

"What if I'm left with no one?"

"You won't be. Trust me. Too many care about you, Jungkook."

"Hy-Hyung. . ." Jungkook began crying harder, thinking back to that terrible day. "I-I did s-something terrible."

Namjoon furrowed his eyebrows. "What did you do?"

"I-I. . ."

"Jungkook. . ."

"I. . . I. . ."

"Out with it."

"I drugged someone!"

"You what?"

He jumped when a song began to play in Namjoon's pocket.

The older boy sighed and took his phone out of his pocket. "Hold on." He put the device to his ear. "Hello?"

Jungkook tried to control his breathing, but the guilt was suffocating his heart.

"Are you okay? What did the doctor say?" Namjoon asked the person on the other line.

"Wh-Who is it?" he asked weakly.

Namjoon didn't even look at him to acknowledge what he said. "I can leave right now. . . . . Hyung, are you sure?. . . . . Okay, then. I guess I'll see you after school. Take care. Bye." He hung up on the phone and put it in his pocket.

Jungkook waited for him to bombard him with questions about what he said or yell or something like that.

But all Namjoon said was, "I'm taking you to the hospital to see your uncle after school." Then he turned on his heel and walked back down into the school.

Jungkook was left alone once again, worried, but not surprised.

He remembered that talk he and Uncle Jin had the night he pounced on Namjoon because he thought he was going to rape him.

At the end of their conversation, Jungkook asked, "Uncle, have you told him yet?"

Uncle Jin shook his head, a sad look taking over his eyes. "I haven't found the time. With everything that's happened to me and I just barely got him back. . ."

Jungkook nodded. "You realize you'll have to tell him at some point, right? You can't hide it forever. The signs will show."

Uncle Jin hung his head. "I know."

He wondered when Uncle Jin was going to finally tell Namjoon the truth.

Jungkook sighed in relief as he opened his bedroom door and plopped down on his bed.

His 2-year-old German shepherd Ippy jumped on his bed and rested at his side.

"Hey, girl," Jungkook said as he stroked her hair. "It's been a long day."

She licked his hand to comfort him. She always did that when he was in a bad mood. It made him smile.

He and Namjoon didn't get a chance to talk about his confession on the roof. And since Min was with them in the car he assumed that's why Namjoon didn't bring it up.

No one knew about the boy who Jungkook drugged except for Namjoon.

Not even Uncle Jin.

Speaking of, Uncle Jin had to go to see the doctor for a "check-up". He told Namjoon that he was feeling dizzy, but that it was just because he was dehydrated. Namjoon bought it, but Jungkook knew it was just a cover up of the real truth.

After the hospital visit Jungkook went back home with Uncle Jin.

He remembered saying, "Uncle, have you visited Yvette yet?"

Uncle Jin shook his head. "Next month."

Jungkook noticed the color drained out from his face and the tired look he tried to cover up.

"You're getting worse," he said.

Uncle Jin managed a tight smile. "I'll be okay."

"What if you don't. . . I mean you have a child on the way. What if you don't get to. . . be there in time?"

"Even if I did worry about that," Uncle Jin said, "it won't do much good. Things will unravel the way they are meant to. I'm fighting with everything I have, but my destiny is my destiny."

Jungkook sighed. Uncle Jin reached over and began to rub his thigh, just as he always did when they were in the car. He took that opportunity to intertwine their fingers.

Uncle Jin quickly glanced over at Jungkook and smiled.

Jungkook didn't want him to go so soon. It was too soon.

He rolled over on his right side and closed his eyes, hoping to get some sleep.

But then the door bell rang.

Grumbling, he stood up and walked down the stairs to see who it was, Ippy following him and barking in the process.

"Shhh, Ippy!" Jungkook chided as he looked through the peek hole of the door.

"Jungkook-ah!" came Taehyung's voice.

"Oh, no," he whispered.

Tae banged on the door. "Jungkookie-ah! I know you're in there! Let me in!"

"Dammit," he cursed. "How does he know?"

As if hearing him, Tae called from the other side, "Jin-hyung told me where you were! Open up!"

Jungkook cringed as he twisted the cold knob and opened the door.

"Yes?"

"Yah! I knew you were in there!" he said, folding his arms.

Ippy squeezed through the space between Jungkook and the threshold and jumped on Tae.

The older boy happily kneeled to pet her.

"Did you need something?" Jungkook asked.

Tae shot him an irritated look. "You've been avoiding me, Jeon Jungkook. Why is that?"

"Am not!" the younger denied.

"Are too!" the older shot back.

Jungkook huffed. "I don't know why."

But he indeed knew exactly why. At first Jungkook didn't recognize him, but since the camping trip he realized that Taehyung was the boy he drugged.

It was dark that night and Jungkook's old friends dragged Taehyung off to an alley. He remembered how scared Taehyung sounded. He cried and pleaded and Jungkook wanted so badly to give in and let him go, but his friends pressured him into digging that toxic syringe into his skin while they held him down. All because he was gay.

How pathetic he felt.

After, Jungkook's friends left Tae intoxicated and unconscious on the cold floor. Jungkook stayed behind and dragged him out into a public area where people could find him, but he didn't get a good look at his face before running off.

He also realized that just two days later he found Tae hung ready to jump off of that wooden structure.

He nearly led someone to kill to himself.

He deserved to die for that.

That's the real reason why he was avoiding Tae. But Tae hadn't the slightest clue.

Tae scrunched up his nose. "Ippy smells terrible."

"I haven't bathed her yet."

He looked up at him and smiled his innocence box smile.

It made Jungkook sick to his stomach.

"I can help bathe him. Then you and I can talk."

"No thanks," he said. "I'll bathe her by myself later."

Tate's smile wavered. "Kookie, you're so mean to me. Did I do something to make you not like me?"

Jungkook shook his head. "It's not like that."

"Then what is it? I mean I don't really talk to Yoongi-hyung, but even he's talking to me more than you."

Jungkook bit his lip. "Okay. Fine. You can help me."

The older boy jumped up in excitement and ran into the house, the German shepherd following after him.

Jungkook only shook his head before following him upstairs.

"So, Jungkook," said Tae, "how are things with you and Min going?"

"Fine, I guess," he said as he picked up Ippy and set her in the bathtub.

Tae turned on the water. "Do you like her?"

Jungkook put some soap on his hands and began to scrub Ippy. "Sure. I like her."

Tae joined in, smiling to himself. "But I mean like do you really like her?"

"No," he said unhesitatingly. "I don't see her that way."

It was true. He didn't like her in that way. She was a really good friend to him, but he didn't feel anything more than that for her, even though he could tell Namjoon wasn't convinced.

"I think she likes you more than a friend," he said. "But you kind of already knew that, didn't you?"

The younger nodded. "Yeah. I feel bad. Maybe she'll fall for someone else."

"Where are your parents?"

"Working over time."

"Again? They were working when I came last time, too."

"Yeah. They work a lot."

"Does it make you sad?"

"Not really, because when they are home we're always fighting with each other."

"Mmm. Yeah."

Jungkook grabbed the cup he always had in the bathroom and filled it with water before pouring it on Ippy's head. She let out a whine.

Tae played with her tail. "And how are Yoongi and Jiminie-hyung? They've been spending quite some time together."

"Yoongi-hyung told me he knows that Jimin thinks he wants to get back together with him, but he doesn't," Jungkook replied. "But he does feel bad for the way that things ended so they're slowly making up, I guess."

"Maybe he's just saying that."

Jungkook sighed. "No. Yoongi-hyung is a bad liar. I can tell. He wasn't lying. He said he likes someone else."

"Who?"

"Dunno."

"Are you lying?"

"No! I swear! I know nothing!"

"Okay, okay," Tae laughed.

Irritated, Jungkook scooped up water in his hands and threw it in Tae's face.

Tae stared at him in disbelief. "Yah! Did you just. . .? Oh no you didn't!" He retaliated with a bigger splash.

Pretty soon they were having a full on water fight. Poor Ippy stood there, staring at them as they acted like three-year-olds. It went on for quite a while. Jungkook felt genuine happiness. That was the good part about having such good friends. They were able to make him forget about his problems.

Finally, they settled down beside each other, panting.

"I missed you, Kookie," said Tae with a smile.

Jungkook then remembered the guilt that was heavy in his heart, but he managed a smile. "Come help me finish up Ippy."