i hissed from the burning feeling around my lips.

so this is what getting beaten up feels like.
i limp my way back to the bedroom and lay down on my back while flinching a little. my back feels like breaking into two parts, my legs have long given up on life while my face; it's messed up. cuts and bruises decorating my face, it was hard to swallow the pain but i did.

so this is the cost of desiring about someone who doesn't belongs to you. this is the punishment of committing a sin.

but my heart just doesn't care. her beautiful full lips, those eyelashes, those big doe dark brown eyes, soft skin makes me wanna touch them. they all just screams perfection.

mother always warned to never desire something which doesn't belongs to you and somehow i just can't help it. i tried to stay away from her, to not think of her, to not dream of her but again here i was thinking about her. surrounded by her thoughts like she was some kind of cunning witch to possess me in her life and now it was too late to go back.

fixing the hoddie on my head i look around to see if someone was watching me. i look up at the fifth window of apartment. her house.

it was 11.09 pm and i just can't control myself to not see her. the urge was so big that i was having trouble in sleeping. i hate the feeling.

but a warm feeling caged my chest when I saw her, walking in shorts and tank top looking beautiful as always with a book in her hands. her body, a total perfection. i just wanted to consume her.

the thought of her smooth skin, those perky breast, those sweet honey like eyes makes me want to devour her all.

smiling i took left turn and started walking away back from the route i came.

a rough hand pulled me in corner of alley and here lands a punch.

punch.
punch.
and another punch.

my vission blurred resisting me to clearly see who was infront of me. blur image of three people came in front of me. however a half broken heart shaped chain caught my attention first.

creepy bastard. those words rang in my ears and another punch lands on my jaws. blood splitters from my mouth and black dots appears.

stay away from her. with that he kicked my stomach.

like i didn't try.

a groan left me. back in my childhood mother used to punish me if i take something which was not mine. and he is doing the same.

but if seeing her silently gives me peace, then I'm ready to bear this punishment as long as it takes.

black dots appears in front of my eyes. vission bluring and my body giving up, her face comes in front of my eyes. her smiling face. those beautiful big smile on her lovely face but again they were for someone else cause yet always again she was anything, but not mine.