Chapter 39: Faithful Facade
The drive to St. Paul's was brisk and uneventful, though Liam couldn't help but feel a gnawing sense of unease. It wasn't that he minded church, per se—it was the weight of his family's expectations that always made the experience more daunting than it needed to be. His parents were devout, but their devotion was often tangled with their obsession with appearances, status, and doing what was "proper."
As they approached the grand stone building of St. Paul's, its towering spire piercing the sky, Liam felt a mix of awe and apprehension. The church was beautiful, with its intricate stained-glass windows and ornate wooden doors, but it also exuded a sense of formality that made him feel like he was being judged before he even stepped inside.
"I remember this church now," Liam said, pausing at the base of the stairs. His gaze lingered on the familiar steps, a flicker of recognition crossing his face. "I ended up here by accident yesterday after the press conference. I even sat on that bench," he added, pointing toward it.
"Oh?" Noah tilted his head, studying Liam curiously. "Did it help? Make your problems feel smaller or something?"
Liam hummed thoughtfully. "Not exactly."
"Maybe it's because you didn't sit on the steps," Noah quipped with a grin, grabbing Liam's hand. A jolt shot through Liam at the unexpected touch, but it quickly shifted to anxiety as they approached the cathedral's towering doors. "Come on, let's check out the inside. You've got me curious now—I want to see what this place is all about."
The two of them slipped into a pew near the back, Liam glancing around nervously to see if anyone he knew was there. Thankfully, the congregation seemed focused on their hymnals or quiet conversations, and no one paid them much attention.
Noah leaned over, his voice a low whisper. "Relax, Liam. You look like you're about to be interrogated."
"I might be," Liam muttered, glancing toward the altar.
The sermon began, and Liam shifted in his seat, trying to steady his focus. The pastor's words filled the air, speaking about love for others, community, and the importance of faith. As the message unfolded, Liam tried to pay attention, but the words seemed to swirl around him, always just out of reach. The pastor spoke of loving people unconditionally, but also about not loving their sins—about separating the person from their actions.
Liam had heard sermons like this before, but he always found them contradictory in the real world. The familiar phrase love the sinner, not the sin echoed in his mind. How could anyone separate the two so easily? The sinner and the sin were intertwined; one couldn't exist without the other. If the sinner committed the sin, then how could you support them without also supporting the wrongdoing? It felt like a paradox—helping the sinner seemed like it would only encourage more sin. Wasn't it inevitable?
As his mind churned over these contradictions, he glanced over at Noah. To his surprise, Noah seemed completely at ease, absorbing the sermon effortlessly. He followed along with the hymns, his voice soft but surprisingly melodic, and even managed to look genuinely interested in the message. Liam found himself stealing glances at him, wondering how someone so seemingly irreverent to tradition could blend into a setting like this with such ease.
As he surveyed the other churchgoers, Liam couldn't help but notice how most of them wore attire that was much more casual than his own. The women were dressed in simple dresses or blouses and skirts, while the men wore collared shirts, some even with the sleeves casually rolled up. Noah's easy-going style blended seamlessly into the crowd.
It was then that Liam realized—he was the odd one out. His tailored suit, a sharp contrast to the more laid-back look of the other attendees, suddenly felt out of place. The polished shoes, the perfectly knotted tie, and the crisp, ironed fabric felt heavy in comparison to the simplicity that surrounded him. His face flushed slightly as the realization settled in, his own stiff posture only making him stand out even more. Noah had been right after all—he had overdone it.
As the service came to an end and the congregation began to file out, Liam felt a tap on his shoulder, the touch light but firm. He turned to see an older woman, her warm, weathered face framed by silver hair and a kind smile that seemed to radiate kindness. Her eyes twinkled as she glanced between him and Noah, her gaze lingering for a moment, assessing them.
"Good morning," she said cheerfully, her voice rich and soft with the warmth of the community. "It's so lovely to see young men like yourselves in church. Are you new to the area?"
"Oh, no, we're just visiting," Liam replied quickly, offering a tight, polite smile. His tone was polite but distant, the faintest hint of unease creeping into his voice. He tucked a loose strand of his hair behind his ear. "Would you mind taking a photo of us?"
Liam fished his phone out of his pocket, his fingers brushing against the cool, smooth glass as he handed it to her. He hoped the request would be brief, his chest tightening at the thought of too much attention.
"Of course," she replied kindly, taking the phone in both hands. Her touch was gentle but firm, the faint scent of lavender lingering around her. "Let's head to the front of the cathedral. That's the best spot for a picture."
They walked together, the cool stone beneath their feet and the scent of fresh rain in the air from the earlier drizzle. The cathedral loomed above them, its towering spires and intricate carvings casting long shadows in the late morning light. As they reached the grand steps, Liam could feel the rough, weathered stone against his shoes, the chill of the morning air mixing with the warmth of the building around them.
"Ready?" Liam asked, his voice a bit stiffer now, his eyes scanning the cathedral's entrance as he stood at the top of the steps, trying to ignore the tightening knot in his stomach.
"Don't you want him in the picture too?" she asked, pointing to Noah with a raised brow.
"Uh...sure," Liam replied quickly, his tone a little more uncertain now. He waved Noah over, his fingers brushing against the cool metal of the railing as he glanced sideways at him. They stood side by side, their shoes lined up neatly but their shoulders barely touching. The air between them felt thick with unspoken words.
"Closer," the woman instructed, motioning for them to step in. Liam hesitated but complied, his body stiffening slightly as he moved closer to Noah. He could feel the warmth of Noah's arm beside him, the faint scent of his cologne—a mix of cedarwood and citrus—lingering in the air.
"Put your hand on his waist," she instructed again, her voice steady and unyielding.
Liam's breath hitched in his throat, the words catching in his chest as the request sank in. "What?" he said, his voice low, but the surprise in his tone was unmistakable. He glanced at Noah, his heart suddenly pounding in his chest. But Noah, without hesitation, placed his hand lightly on Liam's waist, the touch warm and unexpected.
The slight pressure of Noah's hand sent a jolt through Liam, and his stomach tightened in response. His skin tingled where their bodies were close, his nerves alive in the stillness of the moment.
"Perfect," the woman said with a smile that seemed to linger just a bit too long. She snapped the photo, the sound of the camera's shutter echoing in the stillness. Liam stood frozen, his pulse hammering in his ears, feeling the lingering heat of Noah's hand on his waist long after the photo was taken.
The two of them walked over to the woman to retrieve Liam's phone. "Well, you're always welcome here," she said, nodding politely. "And I must say, you make a lovely couple."
Liam's mind went blank. He blinked, trying to process the words. "A—what?" His voice faltered, disbelief coloring his tone as he stared at her, his mind racing to find the right response. So that is why she told him to pose that way.
The woman smiled warmly, oblivious to the sudden tension in the air. "It's so refreshing to see young people like you together, supporting one another. It's what we need more of these days."
Liam's heart hammered in his chest, and his mind scrambled for something to say. He glanced at Noah, who for the first time seemed speechless, a blush creeping across his cheeks and a giddy smile spreading on his face.
"I—" Liam started, but his words caught in his throat. "No, we're not—uh, we're just—"
The woman's smile didn't falter. "Oh, of course. I apologize if I've said anything wrong." She chuckled lightly, handing the phone back to Liam. "Well, you're always welcome here, regardless. Take care, now."
Liam stood frozen for a moment, staring at the woman's retreating back, still processing the interaction. His cheeks felt warm, and he could hear his pulse in his ears.
Noah gave him a sidelong glance. "You okay?" he asked, his voice quieter than usual.
Liam nodded stiffly, though the unease still gnawed at him. "Yeah, just...surprised, I guess. This is the last place I'd expect rumors to follow us. The church is—or at least, I thought it was—pretty conservative about things like that. So for someone, especially an older woman, to think we're a couple...it's kind of shocking, to say the least."
Liam ran a hand through his hair, still processing the woman's comment. His thoughts churned, but he didn't want to dwell on it any longer. The weight of the situation was starting to settle in, and he needed a change of focus.
"Thanks for coming with me," he said quietly, glancing at Noah.
Noah grinned, teasing, "Anytime. Besides, what are boyfriends for?"
Liam's heart skipped a beat at the word "boyfriends." He could tell Noah was joking, but something in his eyes made the remark feel heavier than it should have, especially with the rumors and the upcoming press conference hanging over them.
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