MADISON

I turned around and tried to examine why he finds pleasure in watching me suffer.

I have nothing else to say. I always let him walk over me repeatedly, because I can't stop wanting what he would never give me.

Why am I stupid? Why am I like this?

I'm moving back to New York. I am freaking done with this place. He can have the major, the house, my whole fucking dream. I just need to be away from him for rehabilitation, because what the hell is wrong with me? 

I pushed past him and didn't wait for the elevator because I know I would get locked up with him, and right now, that's the last thing I want.

So I descended the staircase, practically taking two steps at a time while he called behind me.

"Wait!" He tried grabbing my arm on the lawn, but I yanked my hand. "Do not touch me."

"Mad?" He continued to tail behind me on the street.

Please, leave me alone.

"Maddie?" So now I'm Maddie! Great. He can start up another prank, what about this time, kill me. "Maddie... Please..."

Just almost to his vehicle, he clutched my arm, this time firmly, and stopped me from moving. "You will never believe me..."

I exhaled an unbelievable laugh; he must be insane.

After what I saw up there, he really would bring up trust into this?

It's just so sad how I believed him at the community health care center. I thought...

I guess I need to grow up and agree to the fact that Caden would never stop torturing me. That's what he was designated to do; he wouldn't change.

"You have a girl in your room... Avery... You probably had her the whole weekend." What hurts more was, he knows how I feel about Avery yet he uses her as a weapon to butcher me. "You choose that person to get to me." I spat, hitting his chest with my free hand. The anger was overwhelming, a surge of compiled rage from everything l'd been holding inside, all the frustration, all the things l'd wanted to do but never dared. My palm found his face, delivering several quick slaps he couldn't block in time. One side of his face flushed red almost instantly. This was what I had always wanted to do.

"What? no!" He exclaimed and then added something absurd. "I choose you over all of them."

So he could lie blatantly to my face? No, he needed to be beaten. I slapped him again, harder this time, fury driving me. He managed to grab my wrist after the second slap, but while his strength focused on restraining one hand, I freed the other and drove it into his stomach. He could be made of stone for all I cared-I was determined to punch through him today. He would feel the pain he had inflicted on me.

He let go and backed away, his eyes wide, almost pleading, but it was too late for that. I lunged at him, hitting him anywhere I could reach as he retreated, step by step.
Hopefully, there weren't any cops or nosy neighbors watching, because l'd definitely be locked up for domestic violence. The stupid system wouldn't even care about the pain he'd been causing me behind closed doors.

But you know what? I don't fucking care. Let them throw me behind bars if it comes to that. At least l'd get to beat his ass first. At least then, Dad and Mom would finally see the monster they had left me with.

"You are insane..." I shake my head at him and point over to our floor. Jumping and slapping him again until he snatch my hand again. "Avery is up there, and you can shamelessly tell me crap like that? Get your hand off me." I wiggled my arm, but his grasp was so steady. Then, he grabbed the other arm and made it impossible to break out.

"I swear she must have come here while I was at your workplace, WITH YOU." He emphasized the last two words, his widened eyes piercing mine. "You have to believe me. I swear I had no plan to hurt you. Not anymore, Mad."

I'm not dumb; I am not falling into his trap this time.

"How did she get your key? Wait, did she steal it?" I sarcastically asked the usual lie. "Tell me the tale. How did she steal it when you were unconscious?"

"I have no idea how she got in... I have my key here." His hand freed my arm, and he dug out his key.

Granted! He had been with his key, but I believe all this is a setup of his. She had been here with him while I was at Asher's.

He got me convinced to follow him home so he could hit me with another heartbreak again.

And guess what. He has successfully won.

I am going back home to my parents.

"You have no idea?" I scoffed. "Caden, you hate me so much huh?" I thoughtfully asked, as he swallows and disconnects our eyes, looking around the quiet neighborhood. "I understand you said it several times. I remember your promises as you had vowed to twist my life until I regret ever breathing. That's why you're here in Stanford, that's why you're here next to me."

That got me my freedom; his other hand finally freed me, and I could breathe, only it was tensed.

His fingers shoved into his hair, and his sharp gaze lingered on our neighbor's garden.

"Why can't you understand I've become addicted to you?" He exhaled a laugh; his almost dark eyes found mine again. "Why can't you see you've consumed the entirety of me? You're all I can trace. All I can follow. You're everywhere in my head; I can't stop myself from wanting only you alone?" When I remain still in front of him, he cups my face with his big warm hands. "Don't leave me again..." He begged; his eyes held nothing but those same words. "Last week when you left... it had been more severe than any grief I have."

"Caden, you have... What about her?" I stuttered.

"I will get rid of her... I will get rid of all of them." He eagerly retorted. "Look, I will do the food and the laundry; I'm not good with cleaning. But I will do that too... Anything." He shakes his head.

"Caden..." I began, but he cut me off. "I want to change," he sweared, his voice shaky. "Give me a trial period. If I fail, you don't have to punish me. I'll punish myself. I'll come to terms with the fact that I'm a danger to society. I'll be alone for the rest of my life. But just... just give me this chance with you. I want to be with you." His throat shifted as he spoke, his eyes pleading, desperate and his voice dropped, "I will give everything."

Maybe it's the sincerity I see in them, or maybe I just want him to want me the way I want him, to become the ideal man I've always wished for myself. But I thaw. I hate that I did, but fighting against the feeling of love is the trickiest battle. Now I understand the people who return to their abusers like a butterfly to the flame, an addict to drugs, or a man to a job that exploits him. And I believe his words.

It warms my heart, and I let out a small relieving gasp before saying: "I guess I will do the cleaning then..."

"You don't wake up early on weekends, so I will make breakfast around ten. You can use the bathroom first... Anytime you want actually, but I don't mind showering together." He continues, and I found my eyes welling up.

Maybe it was because I knew I shouldn't be trusting him, or because I was desperately hoping this would remain true, that I prayed so hard inwardly.

"Uhm... That's a little too soon." I chuckled.

"Why?" He frowned.

"I-" I am not confident enough to shower with other eyes watching me. Unlike him, I lack that confidence.

"Shame... because you have a very beautiful body to show." He remarked, and heat suddenly spread across my cheeks.

I look up to him and ask the necessary question: "Are we really doing this? Are you sure about this?"

"What?"

"Compromises. Commitment..."

He smiles and strokes my cheeks with his thumbs. "We should have done them a long time ago."

I close my eyes and allow myself to lean into his touch. "I can't believe you are actually mine." When I reopen my eyes, I smile at him. "Unless I am getting my hopes high, or this is yet another tortured dream."

He cocks his head adorably, with knitted brows. "Wait, did you say you have dreams similar to this?" He grinned, and I roll my eyes at him. "I've always known you're mine."

Excuse you...

"I've always murdered every competition. I couldn't stand anyone being close to you." He admitted.

Shit! Did he just say he had been jealous? Not that it was justified, but it stirred something within me, knowing that I wasn't the only one who had always felt something for him.

"That? Everyone? Even the girls?" My mouth fell to the curb.

He smiles at my reaction. He has his thumb tracing the edges of my lips while his eyes bore on my slightly parted lips. "Everyone wanted to be your friend; I couldn't take the chance. So I assassinate those possibilities. I only want you to myself. I am sorry for that." He whispered playfully.

Smiling, I assured him I am his and I will always be.

Growing up, he had been the only one I know, since he had crushed all my chances of making friends and meeting new people. I've grown used to him; he was all I see. Not anyone.

A frown is plastered on his redden face which I had hit quite a few times, and he swallows, his eye lowered to my shoes. It was then I noticed he was barefooted.

Wait... Did Caden Thaddeus actually follow me? Barefoot?

"What is it?" I asked softly, my fingers lifting his chin.

"I have nothing new or special to offer you. But I promise I'm yours to possess. You can mold me any way you desire. I will always be here for you."

Staring at him, I knew he truly meant it. Sane, Caden wouldn't give this sensitive admission to me or anyone else if he weren't truly resigning from his denial and surrendering to his feelings. It was the best thing I've ever received from anyone.

"False, you gave me this." I motioned between the two of us. "Something no one has ever gotten from you. It's your first and forever I am grateful for."

That was enough to bring back that brilliant smile, and he leaned in until our lips met.

Dear universe, can you please let me have this forever?

It was after a very long time when he pulled away and whispered in my ear: "Now let's go send out the intruder in our apartment and get ready for the rest of the classes."

So I can say the day that started oddly sour has turned out unbelievably great.

At school, after the second class, I finally reclaimed my front seat next to Caden. And yes, Asher moved back with me too.

I can only thank him for the support. I don't know what I would've done without him.

It was then Caden had to run errands; he said he'd be back before the next class.

I went to the library to do some homework and catch up on courses I was behind. I'm positive from now on, I can focus on my studies as I've always wanted.

The vibration of my phone from the table attracted some sets of eyes. I had to apologize before looking over to the phone screen.

It was an unsaved number.

With knitted brows, I accepted the call and brought the device to my ear, waiting for the person to speak.

And they did, only it wasn't what I ever expected.

"This is the Palo Alto Police Department. Your stepbrother, Caden Thaddeus, has been arrested for attempted murder."