"Aren't you disappointed in me?" Dae Ho asks, tucking Soomin under the comforter, moving the strands covering her eyes to put them behind her ear.

Haneul replies with a shake of his head.

"Not even a little bit?" Dae Ho pushes, unsure of the doctor's answer.

"Disappointed? No, not really. It's more like..."
Haneul ponders, fingers drumming against his thigh. "It's more like I want to punch you across the face a few times."

Dae Ho is taken aback, a laugh escaping his lips. "Are you sure you're not deluding villainy with hero-complex?"

"Never mind that, instead of dwelling on the negative aspects of your life, you should look at the brighter side."

"That's easier said than done."

Haneul shakes his head. "You probably disregard the nice things you've done since you've fallen in your own eyes."

"Nice things?" Dae Ho gives the doctor a disbelieving look, challenging if he could prove him wrong.

"Yeah, for example, you saved Choi Yoon's life when he was at his worst."

"I didn't save him out of the goodness of my cursed heart, but because I needed his technical skills."

"Do you really think I'm going to buy that crap?" Haneul throws him a glare with a scoff. "Even so, you saved him."

"..."

Dae Ho wasn't lying about needing Choi Yoon's skills. He stalked the man for months but when witnessed Yoon lose his mother and be betrayed by his father, he saw himself in him. A lonely and vulnerable soul asking someone to put off the blazing fire in his chest before he turns to ashes. Ending their life when they couldn't turn to anyone was an easy and worthwhile decision at the moment. And Dae Ho couldn't help but reach out to the man standing on the roof of the tall building.

"I tried killing myself a few times." Dae Ho admits, Haneul wincing at the admission. "But every time I attempted to do it, I saw Minji's face. Not the bloody and tearful one I see in my dreams, but the content smile she gave in her last moments. Live..." The fighter intertwines his fingers together, his throat turning dry. "That one word has an overwhelming power over me and I can't bring myself to disappoint Minji anymore than I have."

"D-do you still feel like...doing it?" Haneul's words are cautious, his tone soft.

Dae Ho's silence gives him his answer so the doctor purses his lips together. The younger is like a shattered mirror and shattered mirrors still have cracks even after being put together, incomplete due to the pieces lost when shattering. But a glued-up cracked mirror is better to have than the one that's lying fallen apart on the floor. Haneul thanks Minji for looking over her brother all these years even after she's no more.

"You could seek hel—"

"I'm not going to a therapist. You're not the first person to suggest it so let it go."

"Bu—"

"Don't worry, I'm not going to try again at least until I break every bone in Vee's body."

That's still not assuring but Haneul settles with a nod. He knows he shouldn't push his luck with Dae Ho, this much is already a lot of progress than he had in months. He could keep an eye on him and even ask Yoon and Shadow to do it, although, he thinks the two already do that without him asking. At least Dae Ho has people he could rely on.

"You said you weren't...disappointed with me."

The blue head hums, urging the fighter to go on.

"When can I meet them?"

"Who?"

"Soomin's twin."

Haneul stills, fingers curling over the bedsheet. He shuts his eyes, taking in deep breaths.

"I'm assuming they live with your wife since you're divorced," Dae Ho continues, head turned to look at a peaceful Soomin unaware of Haneul's reaction. "Will I be—" he stops when he takes in the doctor's features. "Is something wrong? I'm sorry, I crossed a line. I shouldn't ha—"

The older man shakes his head, lowering his gaze to the floor. "N-no, it's not about you. Soobin...Soobin passed away twenty-eight days after his birth."

Dae Ho's ears ring with Haneul's words, not believing what leaves his lips. All this time he's been speculating that each parent held custody for one child.

"He...was weak even before he was born, about four weeks of delayed development unlike Soomin who was healthy. Respiratory distress syndrome didn't let him...live for long." The father's eyes cloud with unshed tears, gulping audibly. "Burying your child is the hardest thing a parent could do."

"I—I'm sorry, Haneul. I didn't know..." Dae Ho puts a comforting hand on his shoulder and squeezes it lightly.

"It's okay, even Yoon doesn't know it."

"I thought you were living a hap—"

"The happiest and best life I could?"

Dae Ho nods, guilt rooting in his gut. He thought when he left, Haneul and his other friends' lives would be easier with him gone. He didn't keep up with their lives, especially Haneul's, knowing how he'd try to get back the life he's left behind. All this time, the fighter has been believing he's the one living a hard life.

"Well, my marriage and the family I always dreamt to build, fell apart that day. Naeun and I stopped seeing eye to eye. Instead of healing, we were breaking each other. It started with screaming and shouting, blaming each other, and daily arguments. I was pulled into a dark place during the first year of Soobin's death. At some point, Naeun started physically harming me at times to release stress and I couldn't bring myself to care. My self-esteem and confidence plunged, a pang of guilt eating me up from inside because I couldn't save my child. I pushed away my family claiming they didn't have a say in the matter but they still didn't give up on me." Haneul gives a bittersweet smile. "My life had been turned into something similar to a nightmare, until one day...Soomin got hurt. It was a wake up call for me."

The father shudders recalling the memory. "My baby was bleeding and it was all our fault. Took her to the E.R and when my parents ran to the hospital, I broke down...I broke down hard. I and Naeun were mourning for a loss but forgot to pay attention to the living. Amidst the chaos, we overlooked the child that needed love and care. And so, I pledged to myself I'd do better for her, be a father she'll proudly introduce to others. I started therapy but couldn't live with Naeun since she didn't try to save our relationship, so we divorced."

Of all the people Dae Ho has come across, Kim Haneul is the last one he'd think would need therapy since his very existence is a therapy in itself. But then again, he knows nothing about the trials he's been through in the past years. And perhaps now he understands the doctor's insistence on wanting to be there for him after Minji died because now the feeling is mutual. He would've wanted to be there by his side when he lost his child.

"You—you are a great father, Haneul." Dae Ho states, patting the doctor's shoulder. "I haven't seen much but I can already tell Soomin would turn out great with the way you've been bringing her up."

"If that were true, she wouldn't be asking for her mother now and then. I'm probably doing something wrong to make her feel her absence."

"She's a child and it's going to take time till she adjusts to Naeun not being there, you'll have to be patient. You may be doing other things wrong but definitely not this one."

"Other things like?" Haneul asks, relentless to back down.

"Like...like dyeing your hair blue as if you're still in college!" Dae Ho points a sturdy finger at the man's head, Haneul breaking into boisterous laughter at the ridiculous claim.

"Stop being a hater, my hair is fabulous, you're just too blind to see its beauty." The previous wiped-out smile is back on the doctor's face and it's refreshing to see it in its place. "Even ChangMin-ssi complimented my choice."

"That's because he is a dye maniac."

"He's older to you, respect your elders, you brat."

"I'm almost thirty, stop calling me embarrassing names."

Haneul's playful smile veers into a serious one once again. "You know...after your disappearance, it was hard to not think about what may have happened with you and Minji. I realized if I wouldn't have been so drunk that day, we could've prevented whatever resulted in your—"

"—It's not your fault, they would've gotten to me one way or other." Dae Ho cuts in, moving away to face the doctor. This was the blame Haneul had taken upon himself, the one Yoon talked about.

Haneul turns a deaf ear to the fighter's interruption. "Since that day...I haven't have had a drop of alcohol in my system. Call it compensation or punishment of some sort. I needed to do something to push down the guilt and that was the only one I could come up with."

"What..." Dae Ho's astonished eyes elicit a chuckle from Haneul. "Wow..." he's never heard of someone being sober for so long and with the things Haneul has gone through, his child's death, divorce, Dae Ho's disappearance, and self-esteem issues.

"It was hard at first, very tough. With the events happening in my life, my fingers itched to feel the neck of the bottle, throat and mind screamed for a temporary solace, heart yearned for a peaceful sleep after passing out from drinking. Sure, there were times I almost had the glass pressed to my lips but my resolve was stronger, remembering why I stopped in the first place. I lost you that day because of my drunk state and my spiteful words had been a cherry on top. After years of endurance, I don't have the urge to drink at all, the sight of it is revolting at times."

And yet again, Kim Haneul manages to leave Dae Ho speechless. He stares at the man in awe, still processing his words. It is ironic how one of them completely stopped drinking while the other drowns himself in it. Indeed, it is a comical scenario. And shame washes over Dae Ho for the first time in years, at the state he has stooped to.

"I'm not belittling you or anything," Haneul says as if he's read the fighter's thoughts. "What you went through is far more traumatic than what I've faced. All I'm trying to say is you can heal from this too, it'll take time but you'll get there someday."

Dae Ho hums, trying not to disrupt the calming mood. "Not now but maybe later."

And that's the only agreement Haneul needed to hear for now. "Talking and clearing out things was nice." The doctor smiles, stifling a yawn. "But I need to sleep, my job starts in a few hours."

"Of course, thank you for all this, really. And sorry for that." Dae Ho point at his neck, indicating the marks on Haneul's.

"It's alright, it wasn't on purpose. Although, don't be a stranger after this," Haneul warns, picking up Soomin from the bed and walking out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Dae Ho heaves out a long breath, surprised with how much he's talked, years' worth of feelings. He has piled up emotions one upon the other for so long that he forgot simple communication helped in lifting his burden. Maybe it isn't so bad letting his walls falter for a bit. He lays on the bed, the conversation from before running in his mind, absorbing all the events Haneul had narrated. The ringing of his mobile phone brings Dae Ho back and he reaches to pick up the incoming call. The first thing he hears is a laugh, a deep one.

"Did you think you could hold me up in a cell forever?"

Dae Ho freezes, his eyes going impossibly wide. "H-how did yo—"

"When you were busy trying to protect the innocent ones close to you, you left your territory unsupervised and forgot to keep your men safe." Vee muses in a mocking tone.

"You ba—"

"—let's save the profanities for later since your precious right-hand man may not survive to see the light of the next day."