Prompt: Based on episode of ATLA called Nightmares and Daydreams. Reader is stressed and has terrible nightmares and she decides not to sleep at all. The team starts to notice her odd behavior and there's a bit of Bucky fluff at the end. 

A/N: Not my best work... Well, I finally finished this request! Sorry, anon, for taking months to finally post it. I named this imagine Nightmares and Daydreams because it's based on an episode of ATLA with the same name. I didn't really write anything about the daydreaming but... oh well. Idk how this turned out but hopefully it's enjoyable to read!

Warning(s): nightmares

***

I've finished all my requests! If you have any, please sent them to me. You can send them by messaging me or sending me an ask on tumblr (even anonymously) marvelous-imagining.tumblr.com/ask

***

You had been an Avenger for many months and you had been on many missions, you had gotten the hang of the job. You knew what you were doing, your missions had been successful, despite few rare cases. You had gotten to know all your teammates and were in good terms with all of them. Everything was great.

Until one day.

You were told you had a mission concerning an evil organisation that you used to work for as an assassin.

Surprisingly, your teammates had no idea. The organisation you used to work for was unknown to everyone who wasn't a part of it. It had only recently been found but everything that had happened during the time you were working there, was as if it had never even happened. There was no proof of you working for them and you had done a great job at hiding it from everyone, you had even blocked it all away from your mind.

You were a spy, an assassin and you rarely got scared of missions but this one took a toll on you and it hadn't even started yet.

You instantly tensed up as you heard the news. You tried to hide your tenseness but it didn't go fully unnoticed.

From the corner of your eye, you could see Natasha leaning back in her chair and turning the back towards you so she could lean a bit closer, still keeping her focus on the others discussing the mission. "You okay?" She whispered.

You didn't answer, you just kept staring ahead of you, crossing your arms and trying to keep your breathing even. You were panicking a little. You tried your hardest to stay calm.

"Y/N?" Natasha asked louder, which caught the others' attention. You just kept staring straight ahead, burying your hands under your arms to stop them from shaking. "Y/N, what's wrong?" She asked and placed a hand on your shoulder which made you jump slightly and pull back away from her.

"I, uh... I'm—" You could finally say something, barely even forming a single word. "I don't feel well," You mumbled as you stood up from the chair. "I'm sorry." You apologized before leaving the room and going to your room.

You ran to your room, ignoring the yells coming from behind you, your teammates calling out your name. You slammed the door closed and rested your back against it. You lifted your hand up to your mouth and let out a sob, feeling tears forming in your eyes. You let your back slide against the door as you sat down on the floor, sobbing into your hands.

You stayed on the floor for a good few minutes, sobbing, letting out all the panic you were feeling before getting up and wiping your tears. You had to act strong. You couldn't let anyone know what you had gone through, it would be too much of a shock to tell them now.

***

You were taking a relaxing bath, just lying there, enjoying the quietness. You closed your eyes and let your head rest against the wall behind you. You hummed in pleasure as you felt your nervousness wash away.

Suddenly you started smelling something metallic. The smell was very strong.

You opened your eyes and sat up, looking at the tub you were in to see the water was no longer clear but blood red. Your eyes widened in fear and you held onto the edge of the tub, trying to get up only to be pulled back in.

This is the blood of all your victims, you heard a voice say.

In your panicked state, you didn't know if the voice was coming from inside your head or right next to you.

You started screaming, desperately trying to get away from the tub only to be pulled back in several times.

You tried to get out once again but of course you were pulled back in but this time you were pulled under the blood. You tasted the iron and tried to scream even more.

You can't run away from your past forever.

Just when you were about to stop breathing you jolted up, panting heavily.

You looked around to see yourself sitting on your bed. You reached out to turn on the lamp on the bedside table and took in the mess around you.

Your covers were kicked off the bed and the sheet, that was supposed to be tucked under the mattress, was now in wrinkles, out of its place.

You ran a hand over your sweat covered forehead and sighed. You realized you had a nightmare, a terrible one.

You got out of bed and walked over to the bathroom. You opened the door but closed it and backed away as you saw the tub, reminding you of the nightmare you had woken up from only a while ago.

You shook your head and let out a long sigh before changing to your workout clothes and heading to the gym, thinking you could really use some training.

I'm stressed because I don't feel like I've trained enough, you tried to make some sense of your stressfulness, trying to make yourself believe it wasn't because you were scared.

You huffed, shaking those thoughts as you walked over to the punching bag, ready to get your frustration out on it.

***

The same continued for a few days. You had nightmares every night and you just gave up on sleeping and went to the gym instead.

Your nightmares had gotten worse and worse so one night you just decided not to sleep at all just to avoid those horrendous, scarring dreams.

You spent the whole night at the gym, punching the bag, lifting weights, running on the mat and so on.

"How long have you been up?" You heard a voice behind you just as you were about to throw another punch.

You jumped, turning towards the person abruptly with your arms up in defense. Bucky frowned at your reaction and stayed behind until you calmed down.

You turned back to the punching bag and continued training. "The whole night." You said between strikes.

Bucky nodded, slowly making his way towards you. "And you've been training for the whole time?" He asked while crossing his arms, noticing your furrowed brows and tensed jaw.

"Yup." You said shortly.

Bucky observed you for a while, he figured something was wrong. You were acting in a strange way. You were avoiding his gaze and were surprisingly quiet. He also remembered how you stormed out of the meeting. He was determined to find out what was wrong.

He was too late, though. You had already began to leave. "Y/N, wait—"

"Now's not a good time." You muttered as you left the gym, not even glancing back at Bucky.

Bucky sighed as you left him alone in the gym. He knew something was up but shrugged it off, thinking that maybe you were just having a bad day.

***

You were definitely not just having a bad day.

The same continued for days. You spent the nights in the gym, not sleeping. The others had taken notice of your odd behavior and were very concerned. They had tried to talk to you about it but you always found an excuse so you could bolt away and not confront them.

They had tried to help you with your stress in many ways but nothing seemed to be working. Everything just made you more stressed and having the others worry about you made you more frustrated. You just wanted to be alone.

"Maybe you should talk it through." Someone had suggested.

You had gotten so frustrated that you left the room. You couldn't talk it out. You had been keeping such a big secret for so long that it would just mess with everyone if you revealed it now.

You had gone to the common room and began to watch a movie but since you hadn't slept for days you were very tired. You could barely keep your eyes open.

You found yourself drifting off to sleep but you were soon waken up by someone saying your name. You jolted up and your hands found their way to the person's neck. You opened your eyes to see you were strangling Clint. You quickly let go of him and jumped up from the couch.

Clint stared at you with wide eyes while holding his neck, coughing violently.

"Clint!" You exclaimed and stepped closer to him. "I'm so sorry!" You cried out as you placed your hand on his shoulder.

Clint shook his head after he was done with coughing and looked at you in bewilderment. "Y/N, you need to work this out. You should realize you have a problem when you start strangling people in your sleep."

You shook your head, still in denial. "I'm fine." You rolled your eyes and turned to look away from him.

Clint began to tell you how wrong you were. He kept telling you that sleep is important and so on. In the middle of his rant, he realized you weren't listening to him at all, you were staring straight ahead with a small smile on your face. It was as if you had fallen asleep with your eyes open.

"Y/N!"

You turned towards him, jumping slightly from the loudness of his voice.

"Seriously! Stop daydreaming and go to sleep." He said frustratedly and began walking away.

"I need help." You finally admitted.

***

You knocked on the door that lead to the room of the one person you thought could understand you the most. You grabbed the ends of your sleeves in a nervous manner and waited impatiently for him to open the door.

When you saw the door opening you tensed a bit more. You were finally going to talk to someone about what you've been hiding since the beginning and it was absolutely nerve-wracking.

"Hi, Y/N."

"Hey, Buck." You said quietly. "Can I talk to you?" You asked.

"Of course." He said and stepped away from your way to let you in. "Is something wrong?" He asked with a frown etched to his face.

You paced around the room for a few seconds, running your hand over your face as you figured out how to start.

You sighed and looked at Bucky who was now sat down on the bed, looking at you with worry.

"Can you keep a secret?" You asked, trying to crack a smile to lighten the mood a little bit.

Bucky nodded, "Of course." He patted the mattress beside him and asked you to sit down. "Tell me."

So you took a deep breath and made your way over to the bed. You sat down next to him and stared straight ahead, afraid of meeting his gaze.

"I never talk about my life before the Avengers." You started off slow. "I've been avoiding that topic and people have respected my wishes not to bring it up." You continued, turning your gaze to the floor. "I've tried to block it out, forget it ever happened and tried to run away." You let out a shaky sigh. "But now, my past is catching up to me."

You felt Bucky place his hand on your leg, right above your knee and you finally turned to look at him. "Who's after you?" He asked, his brows furrowing.

"Our target." You said shortly and he gave you a confused look. "Ever since we had that meeting about our next mission I've just been feeling so stressed and anxious. That's my past, Bucky." You said, tears forming in your eyes. "I used to be work for them as an assassin."

You expected Bucky to pull away from you and go tell the others but he didn't. He just kept his hand on your knee and he sat next to you, not moving an inch.

"You're... You're not mad?"

Bucky shook his head. "No, of course not." He said with a small laugh. "Why would I be mad?"

You shrugged, "I kept a big secret from you and I've killed people—"

"I've killed people too."

"But you were brainwashed." You said with your voice raising. "I was not."

Bucky nods, "We've all done some things we regret. And besides you don't do that anymore. You're an Avenger now, Y/N."

"You're really not mad?"

"I'm just glad you were open with me."

And so tears started falling from your eyes. You cried and wrapped your hands around his neck, pulling him into a hug. A much needed one.

Bucky's arms found their way around you and he pulled you closer to him. He let you cry with your face buried in his neck. He ran his hand up and down your back as he waited patiently for you to calm down.

After you stopped sobbing, you pulled away. You sniffled and wiped the tears from your cheeks. "Thank you." You said quietly and sent him a small smile.

Bucky shrugged, silently telling you it was no big deal. "What do you want to do now?" He asked and you yawned.

"I want to sleep." You said honestly as another yawn came out. "But I don't want to have another nightmare." You muttered as your eyes started closing.

"I'll be here if you have one." He said and scooted back on his bed, resting his back against the headboard. He patted the bed beside him and you gave him a confused look.

"You're going to let me sleep in here?" You asked, surprised by his offer.

"I know how to deal with nightmares." He said and patted the mattress again.

You gave in, nodding as you crawled next to him. You were scared of having a nightmare and you knew that having someone there, if you happened to wake up, would ease your fear. Maybe he would make you go back to sleep.

So you slipped under the covers and placed your head on one of his soft pillows, letting your eyes close.

You felt Bucky's fingers in your hair and you let out a satisfied hum, enjoying the feeling of him gently touching your hair, making you relax even more.

You fell asleep quickly, in only few seconds and drifted off to dreamland.