tw-talks of loosing hair due to eating disorders, explicit talk about eating disorders.

"I'M SERIOUS!" sam yelled at leah through the phone, as she was laughing at him in her dorkish laugh.

"no you're not! you would totally get with her!" leah laughed, as she sat on her bed.

"shut up! i totally wouldn't!"

"are you telling me you wouldn't leave me for the prettiest girl in all of stoneybrook high?"

"yes! i'm showing you that i'm loyal!"

"oh, so it's just to show me that you're loyal? hm?" leah teased him.

"let's change the subject. any ideas for your birthday?"

"uhmmm...probably a small party. the club, you and your family, my family, cece and josh might come if they can find the time."

"i finally get to meet the famous cece and josh? wow, just put a burger king crown on my head and call me a king."

"har, har, har. anyways, i gotta go. meeting at claudia's starting soon."

"hope you have fun."

"don't sound so sad, i'll call again, bozo."

"loser."

"jerk."

"blonde."

"skater."

"CAN'T SWIM-"

leah hung up the phone.

••••

"WAIT, DAWN, IS THIS YOU?" kristy asked at the meeting, as they went through many photos.

"yeah."

"you look great."

"thanks, kristy." dawn smiled.

a ding went off of mary anne's phone, "logan just texted! he said 'playing' and ramen emoji?" she said, clearly confused.

"oooh, boy code, let's analyze. c'mon, bubbles." stacey smiled.

"why me?" leah asked, and she was beginning to brush her hair.

"because you text sam all the time! you'll have to know something about this!"

leah sighed and came over to the girls, "he sent ramen? when sam sends me a ramen emoji, it's either a joke or he's hungry, or we play 'guess this movie in emojis' and it's always kung foo panda." leah said, "but in this case...since he didn't add any quotations or such...he's just playing and likes the use of random emojis."

"you got all of that from one single microscopic text?" kristy asked.

"i used to be an intense arianna grande fan. i could probably solve the zodiac killer case if i really wanted too."

"i'm pretty sure it means he's playing minecraft and eating, but thanks bu-"

"mary anne, it's never literal." stacey objected, and grabbed her phone.

"i made it! sorry!" jessi panicked, and sat on the ground as kristy's timer went off.

"look, you have to send this. there." stacey muttered.

"an alarm? kristy, really?" claudia whined, as kristy shrugged and placed her phone down.

"when was this?" jessi asked, holding up a photo of stacey, mallory, and dawn, "you guys look cute."

"last week. it's was magic hour, so i did an impromptu shoot on the way back from the pizza place!" claudia explained.

leah looked down at the pictures and sat down, grabbing one of her, "why is this here? i took this by myself."

"you look cute," kristy said, "so i got it. it's gonna be a gift for sam."

leah turned to her and smiled, and ran the brush through her hair.

"this meeting is officially in session!" kristy announced, "now, first order of business, my mom said there's this big town hall meeting in a couple of weeks. they're discussing adding a stop sign on edgarstone and kimball."

"finally!" jessi and dawn gasped.

"all the adults in that neighborhood are going to the meeting and they'll all need sitters, so i figured we could plan something fun for the kids and offer a special, discounted group rate." kristy explained.

"supporting community engagement-"

"and special event services! i love it." stacey added on to dawn's sentence.

"right? mary anne and i counted up all the kids in that general area and we came up with 12. we can watch 12 kids. two for each sitter, and one sitter to go around and help out. besides jessi, of course." kristy said.

the phone rang, and stacey was quick to grab it, "afternoon, babysitters club!"

leah continued to brush the brush through her hair, waiting to see what the call is about. she stopped when stacey stopped, and dropped the brush on the ground, before noticing something.

there were huge clumps of hair in the brush. and it wasn't just little hair nests, it was humongous piles of hair in it. and the worst fact of all, it was leah's brush. she was the only one that had used it.

and while the babysitters club was conversing with jessi about how she wasn't counted, leah sat there, her stomach sank, and her face probably very pale.

"i have to go." leah interrupted, grabbing her bag and stuffing the brush in it.

"leah, the meetings not over." kristy objected.

"i know, but, i think i'm sick." leah breathed out, her palms getting sweaty and her face becoming hot.

"oh! uh, please go! take some medicine, do you need someone to walk you home?"

"no, haha, i can make it."

"are you sure? it's five blocks-"

"i said i can make it!" leah yelled at dawn, who was surprised by her outburst, "sorry, i just need to go home."

and with that, leah left the room.

••••

krispy kreame 🍩

heyyy! how ya doin? good?

princess bubblegum 🌸💓

ok. i threw up when i got home.

krispy kreame 🍩

i didn't need to know that. now, i signed you up to help out with dawn. she's a bit nervous taking care of two kids. i was hoping you could help her!

princess bubblegum 🌸💓

uhhhhhh ok.

krispy kreame 🍩

are you gonna come to the meeting today?

princess bubblegum 🌸💓

i don't think so. i threw up this morning too. i'll be there for the babysitting tho. dw.

krispy kreame 🍩

are you ok? how many times have you thrown up?

SIX TIMES.

six times in the last 12 hours, leah had thrown up. it was out of nervousness, stress, and her dinner. just the thought of eating food make her sick and run to the bathroom. she barely slept, resulting in her huge eye bags and fever that was rising.

she sat under her covers, a cold ice pack on her head, and scrolling through instagram.

a knock on her door was placed, and a happy voice filled her ears, "hi! how's it going?"

leah glanced over at ginny, who had a cup of water for leah, "i'm tired." she muttered through her fluffy covers.

"oh, i'm sorry." ginny frowned, and walked over to her night stand and placed the water on a coaster she had there, "lola and i are going to my parent's country club tonight, and louise has a sleepover with david micheal. so...are you ok on your own? or do you want sam to come over?"

"i'm ok by myself." leah muttered, and ginny looked at her sadly.

"it breaks my heart to see you like this," ginny whispered, running a hand through leah's hair as she silently prayed none of it would come onto her hand, "you're always such a fun and happy girl. i hope you feel better."

ginny leaned down to kiss leah's forehead, and leah almost broke down into her touch, but she managed to stick together.

"i just hope you feel better by your birthday. you cant miss a great 15th birthday." ginny sighed, and left the room.

leah sighed and pressed the ice pack onto her head harder, hoping it would comfort her, and her phone buzzed in her hand.

samuel 🦧🛹

kris told me you're not feeling good. anything i can do? do you want some food?

bubbles 🧼👹

i'm ok. thanks tho, sam. <3

••••

KRISTY LOOKED AROUND NERVOUSLY IN THE LOBBY, "wasnt leah gonna come to this? where is she?"

"kristy, she's been throwing up all week. do you really think she would want to come to this?"

"i supposed she wouldn't want to get the kids sick." claudia said, as she looked down the hallway for jessi.

"yeah, but, she was fine one minute, and sick the next. it's like she's faking it!"

"would you like her to send you a video of her throwing up to prove it?" mallory asked all smiley, as kristy cringed.

"i can go check on her after this!" dawn offered.

"thank would be great." stacey smiled, as jessi finally came out of the hallway.

••••

LEAH GROANED AS SHE HEARD THE KNOCKS ON HER DOOR, and climbed out of bed. it was 9 o'clock at night, and no one should be coming to her house.

going down the stairs into the completely white living room, she opened up the door and was greeted with a smile.

"leah! hello!" dawn cheered loudly, making leah's eyes twitch. just what she needed, dawn.

"hello, dawn." leah said, as dawn welcomed herself in and took her coat off.

"i came to check on you, you've been sick all week! we're all really concerned." dawn said.

"thank you for being concerned," leah said, wiping her eye, "but i'm ok. do you want a snack before you leave?" she asked, as they walked down the hallway to the kitchen.

"thank would be nice." dawn smiled, as they went into the kitchen, "i've never actually been this far into your house! how long have you lived here?"

"uhhh...since i was little. we moved here after my dad died." leah said.

"oh." dawn awkwardly whispered, sitting down at the table they had.

"no biggie. want some fruit?"

"uh, i actually just had a milkshake. i'll just have some water if that's alright." dawn said.

leah nodded and went towards the cabinets, but dawn noticed something. she's seen these pajamas before on leah, but they fit her much much better. they were so much looser on her now.

leah grabbed a glass and went to the sink, filling the cup up for dawn, but as she did, she was shaking.

"leah..." dawn was quick to move, and rushed over to her, grabbing the glass, "you're not ok."

"i'm fine. i dunno what you're talking about." leah said.

"leah you're so skinny, you're too skinny-"

"dawn, just leave me alone! you're always so annoying!" leah yelled at her.

"i'm just trying to help you-"

"i don't need your help! i've got this!" leah yelled, "i'm gonna do this all by myself! i'm gonna loose all my hair and i'm not gonna eat for days! i'm gonna get so skinny that i'll be able to fit in a locker! i'm gonna be the prettiest girl in the world! just you wait, dawn!"

"leah, you have to eat. anything, please-"

"just shut up." leah said in defeat, leaving the kitchen and heading back towards her room.

"i'm gonna talk to the club about this, ok? we're gonna help you, we're gonna get you help, ok? leah, this isn't healthy." dawn said, following her down the hallway and up the stairs.

"dawn, don't." leah said, as she was beginning to cry, and wiped her eye with the bottom of her palm.

"leah, we're gonna get you help. you're gonna be ok."

"dawn, i cant get help." leah finally stopped, turning towards dawn, "my mom...she'll send me away. to a hospital. they'll make me eat foods i can't, i'll be put on a IV, i cant do it dawn. i already did it before."

it broke dawn's heart to see leah, one of the most beautiful people she knew, break down in front of her.

"look, i'll start eating. i'll stop throwing up. please, don't get me help. if i still need help after my birthday, please do it. just don't do it right now. dawn, i'm trusting you." leah whispered, as she cried silently to dawn.

dawn nodded, unsure of what to do, but she wanted to help leah, "i'll help you, but after your birthday, we're getting you help."

"oh, dawn, thank you." leah cried, hugging dawn tightly.

and dawn knew, for the next couple weeks, she would have to keep a secret.

she could already feel her stomach sink.

A/N:

heyyyy. heyyy. how y'all doin? are you ok after this? i'm sorry if you're not.

also...original chapter next! 😍😍