A/N Sorry at the delay, had my Dad's funeral last week and has been really hectic. I'm as desperate to finish this as you guys are to read it, so I'm back on the case now. Promise. So here's to more of Martyr Aaron, xxx

Chapter Forty Three

Snuffling, that's what woke Aaron, and as he came around, became aware of his surroundings, he realised that it wasn't snuffling, but Julia, breathing into his neck. He couldn't crane enough to see her face, but he could feel the steady breathing rate of her still sleeping body. Rather than moving, and disturbing her, he too a long moment to appreciate the moment. He couldn't remember the last time he woke with someone like this. Even with previous "girlfriends", and he used that term very loosely, he rarely spent a night with them, if it was a hotel, an overnight trip somewhere, then he'd be up before them and working at his laptop.

No, this was definitely a time to savour, and then his mind cast back over the previous evening. They'd quashed so many boundaries, and he'd had the privilege of watching her come undone, to see her capitulate for the first time. And it was the stuff of dreams, the wonder, the pleasure, her gasps, her sighs...he groaned as his body was not immune to even the memories of her. He didn't want to start digging into her hip earnestly, he was trying not to scare her off. Instead, he twisted to lay a kiss on her cheek. He wasn't going to let her run away from the night before. He enjoyed kissing her, and that was the new norm. She just had to realise that.

Waking up in a comfy bed after several hours of uninterrupted sleep was a rarity, and bliss, but the warm lips teasing her, the strong arms holding her, the hair spattered thigh easing between hers, didn't scare her as she'd thought, instead her body responded even before she opened her eyes. Her breasts forced into his chest, and her lips parted to his tongue.

As soon as she relaxed into him, accepted her face as it was, at the very second he pulled away, his eyes finding hers. She moaned in disappointment, and he grinned.

"Breakfast? I can call room service?"

Stretching she sighed again, then shook her head, "I really feel the need for a huge diner breakfast...at YOUR expense...in that cute little place with a view of the park..."

He groaned, closing his eyes for a moment, "the other end of town? Now? Really?"

She gave him a coy smile, "it serves breakfast until midday..." Glancing past him, she saw the alarm clock that read nine fifteen. "We've got plenty of time."

He laughed, hovering over her, and she loved that naturalness in him, "really? So what did you have in mind?"

Shrugging suddenly a little anxious, she dropped her eyes.

His laughter continued as he kissed her again, consuming her thoughts, with her lips once more. When he stopped this time, lifting his head from hers, she realised her arms were around his shoulders, her body raised off the bed.

Grinning he swiped a kiss to her nose, "I'm going to shower, then we'll get dressed...and I'm taking you for this amazing breakfast."

Her hand on his arm stopped him, and when he turned to look at her, she smiled awkwardly, "don't you..." she looked him up and down, and she knew that meant that she wanted to 'return the favour', but he knew that his own pleasure wasn't an issue. This was ALL about her.

Stooping he kissed her nose, "get a little more shut eye, I won't be long."

A few moments later the warm needles of the shower stabbed at his aching and frustrated muscles, this had been difficult, as nights went, but it had also been enlightening, he had to focus on the right part of the time with Julia. But as he thought about her, his cock flicked to hard once more, it had barely been less than that since they danced the previous evening. Groaning he turned his face to the jet, dreaming for a moment for the time that Julia was complicit in his arousal, happy for him to let go.

Instead he started to lower his hand, he had to do something, but he stopped dead in his tracks as he heard the cubicle door open, felt the whoosh of cool air. He couldn't breathe, he couldn't move, he couldn't speak. He thought that his heart actually stopped, and that was confirmed when a small anxious hand touched his waist, and it started to race like an express train.

Shit. Julia was in the shower with him. He didn't know what to do. Lie. He knew what he WANTED to do...turn around and take in every inch of her, but he also knew that wouldn't help her. She hated feeling like a sexual object, he had to do anything but make her feel that way. So he stayed as he was, stood facing the spray, the only movement, his hand moving to cover hers.

Aaron hoped that would stop her, make her think, but her free hand ran over his spine, up to his shoulder and then down over his flank to skirt his buttock.

His already throbbing erection felt as though it would explode, and he started to talk coding formulae, anything to switch his body off. And it worked...but she didn't stop. As that free hand travelled around his waist to his abdomen, he felt Julia's lips fasten onto the skin between his shoulder blades. As he processed that sensation, her hand slid down to wrap around him, her breasts against his skin, the sensation of her body pressed against him, all were incidental to her hand, that hand encircling him, squeezing, moving.

He groaned, so close to the edge, that he wasn't sure he'd be able to stay standing.

"Fuck!" He exploded with an expletive, and as predicted his legs were shaking. Leaning against the tiled wall with one hand, he took several deep breaths, trying to regain his vision, his control...his sense of anything. Two hands started to rub his back, his buttocks, he could feel the suds, smell the citrus shower gel. And it was all so overwhelming.

Then she chuckled. He heard it and finally spun around to face her. The waterfall shower head ensured that she was soaking wet too, all he could see was her eyes, dark lashes heavy with water droplets, staring up at him, nervously. Aaron wanted to look at her so badly, drop his eyes and finally take in every inch of Julia's body, but that wasn't what she wanted, and he couldn't see her bolt, not after she'd been this brave. The next move was hers.

And her move was to start soaping his chest, at the same time as reaching up to kiss him.

Within seconds he had her pinned against the tiled wall, the water pounding them both as he kissed her with a hunger he'd never known before, his hands grabbed her, in safe paces, arms, waist...and his eyes when they weren't closed were on her, watching her every move.

"Shit!" He finally lifted his head from hers, but still held her close. "Two words uttered, and both curses. You surprised me."

She smiled, her eyes seemed huge as she stared at him, "I'm trying..."

He nodded, "you're doing amazing."

That made her blush, "you must think I'm ridiculous, making such a drama out of everything."

Shaking his head, he dropped a kiss on her nose, their bodies still sandwiched together, nose to toe, "you are the bravest, strongest woman I know, or man. You are really doing this, and I am in awe of you."

It was the truth, but it made her blush again, so cute.

"Let me wash your hair."

Before she could protest, he turned her in his arms, once again avoiding looking at her body. Stepping back he squeezed some shampoo in to her hair, rubbing until it was foaming then as she tipped her head back, he rinsed it all out.

He could almost see her breasts, a slight lean forward, and he'd be there. It took everything in him to stay back, avoiding such an illicit glance. He was no martyr, and he wasn't sure he'd be doing the same if she hadn't given him his little gift. It could have been very different. But there he was, stood there virtually pressed against her naked body. It was the stuff of dreams, erotic, wet, teenage dreams.

Just as he was about to turn away, turn his back to her, she turned around, stood brazen in front of him.

"Don't you want to look at me?"

Her voice sounded so worried, so insecure that he sighed, "I want nothing more. But what do you want?"

She gave a little huff, "I want you to want me."

He rolled his eyes, "you don't get that? I can barely keep things under control." All the while his eyes stayed on her. He could see the shape of her, the vague outline in his peripheral vision, but he fought that, studied her.

"You've got the control of some sort of samurai, Aaron. I want this, I want you to look at me."

He gulped, suddenly this was such a monumental moment, another huge step forward in the quest to make her love herself, to live life, to feel love. He was struggling to stay on track with his plan, and he wasn't sure it was going to work if she kept throwing him off kilter.

"Please."

Her plea tugged at his heart strings, but he gave a slight nod. Then reaching for her hands, he slowly let his eyes drop.

Julia had never felt so exposed, so vulnerable as she did at the moment. She wanted to fight it, to cover herself, but she owed him this, and she HAD to do it. As if sensing her tension, his thumbs ran rings inside her wrists as he let out a long slow groan.

"You are perfect in a Hazmat suit, but..." He gave a long slow wolf whistle, before pulling her into his arms, and devouring her all over again.

It took forever to get dressed, because whilst he didn't touch her, not that way, Aaron couldn't seem to stop kissing her. Peppering soft gentle kisses with hot, hungry ones as she tried to pull on her clothes. It would be so easy to collapse back on to the bed, but he'd promised her breakfast...and check out time was almost upon then. He'd spent so much on her already.

As she finally stuffed the last of their things into the bag he'd brought, he emerged from the bathroom, dressed in a soft washed out t-shirt and jeans that clung to his perfect arse. For so long all she had ever seen him in was a suit, yet she found his casual dress so exciting, so enticing. She was tempted to cross the room and run her hands over his buttocks, but she couldn't, he'd never do that to her.

"You ready?" He asked, pulling her from her daydream. "I just called reception to get us a cab."

Breakfast truly was the greatest, it didn't disappoint, especially when you were sat opposite a hot and very attentive man. At that thought, Julia shook herself, when had Aaron changed from the bane of her life, to this?

After enough food to feed four, and gallons of coffee, he grabbed the bag, and her hand, leading her out into the summer sunshine. Two blocks south was a farmers' market, where they spent an hour browsing, tasting and buying the freshest ingredients they could for meals through the week. Every few minutes, he'd pause to kiss her. Often chaste, but occasionally as passion filled as the previous night. And she swooned almost to command.

By the time they hailed another cab to take them home, they had at least six bags, and her heart was pounding out of control.

They chatted all the way home, his two hands gripping one of hers. Then back at the apartment they were greeted by the dogs. Carrie had called when they were buying tomatoes to say she'd dropped them home. Both were giving them the guilt trip for abandoning them, alternately yapping at their heels and stopping off like hormonal teenagers.

Julia was laughing as she emptied the bags in the kitchen, truly unable to remember such a complete, special and comfortable weekend. It was the best. As she thought about the shower early, the responses she'd eased out of Aaron, two arms wound around her from behind, his chin resting on her shoulder, lips at her neck.

"Penny for THOSE thoughts, cos they seemed pretty erotic."

They were...but she wasn't ready to share something like that, so instead she hid the fact ineffectively, blushing and gibbering awkwardly. And that only made him laugh.

"You can pretend as much as you want, but I know that you are in exactly the same place as me."

Taking a deep breath, she gathered all her confidence, and turned in his embrace, "yeah? Where's that then?"

Grinning he lowered his head to kiss her, languorously and leisurely, before lifting his head and grinning, "in the kitchen...wishing we were in the bedroom..." he paused watching her, then added, "...or the bathroom..." That made her blush, and gave him the answer he was looking for.

In reply, she rolled her eyes, "not really. I'm wondering what's for dinner..."

That made him laugh out loud, "you are such a shit liar....thank god!"

These kisses were becoming the norm, and he was right, as his tongue invaded her mouth, she wasn't thinking about the past, her anxieties, nothing but the sensation of his mouth on hers. There she could lose herself in the here and now.