The journey between Saffron City and Lavender Town on our way up towards Cerulean is a short one, less than a day's walk even with trainer encounters. Despite how tedious the hordes of trainers are becoming, we walk the route like we own it. My four battle-viable Pokemon work in tandem, sliding in and out of battle in barely legal switches.

"C'mon, you big dragon roll! Put some effort into it." yells Fang to Pisces, who is in the middle of wrestling a Rhydon into the ground.

Anyone else would be dead where they stood but Pisces's lips twitch with amusement and she takes a deep breath and breathes out a stream of bright purple fire at her foe. It's down in seconds and she exhales smoke through her nostrils, casting a backwards glance at Fang.

"Yeaaaaah! That's what I'm talking about." yells the excited Umbreon.

The next trainer puts their hands up and announces, "Woah, man, take it easy."

"Pisces, you're at Level 54 anyways. Would you mind falling back for a bit so Reginae can get some experience? Furthermore, Ten, I'm going to need you to go out first."

Ten waddles forth, confused, and just as the trainer sends out their Nidorino I draw him back. He hoots in alarm just before the red light of the Poke Ball sucks him back and in his place Reginae steps out. I send out Ten again onto the sidelines and he gives me a sharp glare. "Really?" he asks.

"You need the EXP, you can't battle, and we can't afford for any member of the team to fall behind. It was just the best solution." I shrug.

"Ethan's not getting any experience points either." Ten points out as Reginae Reflects a barrage of Poison Stings.

Reginae and I exchange a quick glance. The memory of Ethan recoiling from the Pokeball makes me feel queasy.
Cold. Don't want to.

"I have to let him out at some point." I tell him, panic rising in my voice. "I can't just keep him in there."

"Eyes on the battle!" yells the trainer, and I jerk up.

"I got it." Reginae readies an AncientPower and levitates a storm of rocks, which he hurls at the Nidorino. The Nidorino might be strong, but it's not agile, and after cleaving one rock in two with its horn it finds itself surrounded by stones, which slam it in the face.

"He can't just walk around, either. It's pretty obvious that he's not normal from his condition. Someone's going to call us out on it at some point, even given how oblivious most people are around here." I continue, keeping my voice low. The other trainer's giving me a funny look, but he hasn't the faintest clue what we're talking about.

"No one actually knows what Lugia looks like, though." Fang says, tail flailing from side to side. "I mean, I haven't seen him, but he can't be that bad. I kind of want to meet him, actually. He's Ashley's friend, so he's mine too."

His optimism does nothing to persuade me. "Really bad."

"We could... give him a makeover?"

"Yep. I'm sure most salons can hold a Lugia."

"Oh, good. See, for a second there I was worried..."

"It was sarcasm."

Fang's ears drop. There's a final thud and Reginae walks back over to the group, his foe defeated. "Are we done here?" he asks.

I nod, looking at the short, trainerless stretch between us and Lavender. The town itself is tucked around the bend, but I can still see buildings rising in the distance. A tower (man, Kanto really loves their towers, don't they?) soars through the treeline and far into the air. It's made of stone, unlike the last two, and instead of the almost aggravating glint of the other two buildings this one is worn and somber. The windows, which are just openings in the stone, show nothing but darkness on the inside.

I open my Pokedex and pull up the tourist map. There's no gym, few accommodations, and the only landmark seems to be the tower and some radio station. Aside from that, most of the town is dreary residential buildings. The whole place smells like smoke, dirt, and the strange scent that accompanies places inhabited by the elderly. It's a thousand miles away from what I've seen so far of Kanto and though it seems to be creeping all of my Pokemon out, I take comfort in the familiarity of a small town, even one where the dead are higher in number than the living.

"Are we just going to the next route from here?" asks Minerva. "There's noooo way we're staying in a hotel here. I bet there are cobwebs on the cobwebs and they give you a coffin instead of a bed."

"Sure, sure..." I say, looking at the map again, "We'll have to be quick through the next cave though."

"Thank goodness. Let's get out of here." Minerva says, swishing her tails as if to dispel potential ghosts lingering in the air around her.

Several of the other team members follow her, but I stand stock still in the middle of the town, still looking up at the tower. "I wanted to make a quick detour, actually."

Minerva lets out a distasteful sigh but Reginae, eyes round and sad, says, "Okay." and that's the end of it.

We walk past quiet houses with wooden swings in front, many of which have flowers in the windows, and come to a place where all the buildings seem to stop. The tower is situated in the middle of a small field, with a few headstones decorating the spare perimeter, and the grass around it is much healthier than the decaying weeds and sickly yellows that clothe the rest of the town.

"It definitely looks like a cemetery." Minerva comments.

"Lavender Tower. It's one of the largest Pokemon graveyards in the world." I tell her. "We don't... really have anything like this in Johto."

"Uh huh. Makes sense- I don't know why anyone would want to be buried three floors up in the air, anyhow. What happened to six feet under?"

Fang headbutts her, not harshly but rather more of a gentle nudge, and his eyes are full of concern. Minerva shuts her mouth and exhales through her nose, the gleeful smirk gone from her face.

"Sorry," she says.

The building opens up onto a spacious lobby, which is brimming with the scent of herbs and spices. It seems to be emanating from a counter near the center of the room, where an old man stands surrounded by candles that make his face glow with a warm, comforting light and a plethora of incense sticks. He sees me and says, "Young miss, are you looking to buy incense for departed loved ones? If you have no Pokemon with you to bury, you can commemorate those lost on your journey by lighting a candle and placing a stick near the tombs on the upper floors."

"That would be nice, actually." I say.

He nods. "Lovely. How many would you like?"

"Twenty-three." I say. "I'll take twenty-three."

"It's a long way to come." The man tells me, a soft sadness in his voice.

"I've been training for a long time."

"Oh, I can see that much. If you'd like a discount, I can round to twenty and sneak in the extras for free. It's the least I can do."
I push him a generous wad of money, half out of respect for his kindness and half because I can't imagine he gets much business. "That won't be necessary." I tell him. "This should cover the full price."

I pick up a few, the harsh aroma bringing early tears to my eyes, but there's no way I can handle more than half of it. "I've got this," Fang says. His head ring glows purple and one by one, the candles lift into the air, incense still smoking from the sticks at their side. "Let's find somewhere to put these down."

The stairs are wide and easy even on the largest of Pokemon. Pisces slithers up the stairs behind the rest of us and Reginae can go double file with Minerva, which never happens. I sense an ominous presence in the room as I look over the rows of the dead. There are Ghost-types here. The place must be crawling with them, even in what seems to be pure stillness and silence. Feeling more than a little claustrophobic, I take the next set of stairs up to where the graves are sparser and even the dead don't seem to want to congregate.

I crouch down beside the third row of tombs, most of which are faded save for the one I'm in front of.

To Needle, says the stone, A true friend and loyal companion. There's an inscribed picture of a Raticate below, curled around itself and positioned as if it were sleeping.

Reginae uses a gentler version of Petal Dance to lay down a red blanket of flowers beneath us, and Fang places the candles in a line over it, placing down each one with a tink. I light the few sticks that weren't already burning and the smell of cinnamon fills the air. The room seems to breathe again. I think I see the Raticate twitch and the stone, though still cold of death, looks a little kinder in the light of our row of candles.

We crouch down around them, watching the flicker of flame and taking long breaths. It's therapeutic in its own way but when I look at the largest flame, the one inches away from my hands, I can't help but think about how many of these candles are being lit for those who are no longer dead.

At the same time, if I was to light candles for all those wiped out along the way, I would have enough to turn this candle into a tiny star and to make all the windows blaze with its light. I decide to choose a few people in my head and stick with that.

This one's to my Morty, that one's for my Ethan, and that one's for my mom.

My old team, wherever they are, probably don't know or haven't realized that the timeline they'll be returning to isn't the same as the one they left. I think about Lilly's sister, of Silver's team, and the Pokemon back at the lab. I want to grieve by the side of my old team, but they could be worlds or lifetimes away right now.

Regardless, the candles I've lit for my old world will never reach those spirits. It's likely that the afterlife, too, may have been lost to the void.

"Do you ever wonder what's going to happen to us when we die?" asks Minerva, picking up on my concerning train of thought and taking it elsewhere altogether.

I want to dissuade her from using 'when', not at a time where 'when' could be soon or even tomorrow, but I guess it has to take us eventually.

"I don't know, but there has to be something." Fang says. "I don't want to just... stop."

"The stars," Reginae says. "What do you believe in?"

"Whatever the world's already given us. There are Ghost-types. There are legendaries."

"I've never seen Ghost-types as a viable option. There's no way I'd find them. Plus, it wouldn't be... them." I sigh.

"I thought you were all about futile searches and impossible odds." Minerva says. "Seems like your thing."

"Thanks," I tell her. "If you don't mind, though, can we dish out the sarcastic comments later? I need a moment."

It's not the incense making my eyes tear up now.

"It wasn't your fault," Ten's staring straight into the candlelight but I know it's directed at me. "We can all hear you. We know what you're thinking. You didn't blow that world up, Ashley."

"I..." I choke on my own words, and then I feel tugging from five different directions. My team reaches out to me, instead of the other way around, and I'm stilled by their presence. I blink and the tears are still there, but I'm seeing through five different pairs of eyes. Reginae's reciting a prayer for Rose, Ten is thinking of the old team, and even Pisces is thinking about those lost along the way.

I sense another tug, more subtle but just as real, and five turns to twenty-eight, a web of gold stretching worlds and timelines. Though they're no more present than they were just minutes ago, I feel old friends standing over and around me, tasting the offering and savoring one last moment with those they love.

Old team and new team, dead and living intermingle as timelines split and weave around me into a sea of gold, sparkling gold, dotted with silver memories like waves on a distant ocean. All of our hearts beat together and in one voice across time, the past whispers back to me, Hello.

I feel Bronze's fur against me and feel his claws run against my fingers, cold as ice. Static pricks up the back of my neck and I know Lilly's there, with Toxis, Dill, Sky, and Khrys behind her. The old team is at my back, the former dead scattered around the room, and even the Pokemon we've lost this time around stay close to those they loved in life. Rose leans on Reginae's side, Luna and D'spinas gaze solemnly ahead with Pisces, and those we lost early stick by Fang and Minerva, eyes bright.

We miss you. I hear Bronze's voice and my mind. It comes with the rush of every flash, every night spent together, and the warmth of his fire as it was in life.

"I'll see you soon," I promise.

A chorus of voices join in:

You're doing great.

Don't give up now.

We love you.

Show Red what Johto's like, will you?

We're so close now.

For all of us with hearts of gold, whispers a phantom Dill, and Toxis finishes the sentiment:

Stay strong.