jealousy
[jel-uh-see]
noun
jealous resentment against a rival, a person enjoying success or advantage, etc., or against another's success or advantage itself.

"I have a problem," Elsa announced the second she walked in the door.

"Which is?"

"Ashley wants me to dye my hair blue with her."

"Do it!" Brendon encouraged. "It'll look sweet."

"Really? Blue hair with my pale skin and my eyebrows? Yeah, it'll look great," she replied sarcastically, following the guys to Brendon's room.

"I think it'll look cool, Ashley could color your eyebrows for you or something," Tyler spoke up, opening Brendon's window to let fresh air in.

He joined his friends on the bed, listening to the hum of traffic and Elsa wondering what to do with her hair.

"I like my hair," she sighed, lifting a strand of her dirty blonde hair before letting it fall back in place.

"Josh dyes his hair," Tyler shrugged, not really knowing why he thought it would be a good idea to mention Josh.

"Really?"

"Yeah, right now its a faded pink."

"Do you have any pictures?" Dallon asked as Brendon sprawled himself across the bed and put his head in Dallon's lap. Right, but they didn't like each other. Tyler unlocked his phone and opened his gallery, showing his friends a photo of Josh.

"I took this last night, we had pizza for dinner."

"He's fucking hot," Brendon sighed, staring at the picture.

"Hey, he's mine! You have Dallon."

Both Brendon and Dallon turned bright red. "N-No I don't! He's my best friend."

"Mhm, okay," Elsa joined in.

"Want to see another picture?" Tyler asked, suddenly overwhelmed with how much he missed Josh. He wished Josh was nicer so he could hang out with Tyler and his friends.

"Sure."

"He yelled at me for taking that but I thought he looked good so I kept it."

"Damn, he's cute. I wish we could meet him," Elsa sighed, copying Brendon and laying her head in Tyler's lap.

"Yeah, I wish you guys could meet him too," Tyler agreed, twirling Elsa's hair around one of his fingers. He didn't actually want them to meet Josh, because then they'd know he's an asshole and try to get Tyler to break up with him. He didn't want that. He just wanted Josh to be nicer.

"What do you guys want to do today? My house is boring," Brendon said, sitting up so he could look at his friends.

"Oh my gosh, let's go to the new frozen yogurt place!" Elsa suggested excitedly, smiling at Brendon.

"Ew," Brendon's face scrunched in distaste. "I prefer regular ice cream."

"Okay, then let's get ice cream!"

Tyler didn't want ice cream, but he nodded anyway. Whenever they left Brendon's house he was always secretly afraid that Josh would somehow find out. But he wanted his friends to be happy, so they all piled in Brendon's car while he drove them to Tasty Time.

"Should I dye my hair?" Elsa asked Tyler since Brendon and Dallon were talking in the front seat.

"I don't know, it's your hair," Tyler chuckled. "You'll still be pretty either way."

Elsa rolled her eyes. "I'm not pretty, okay? I'm gorgeous."

Her and Tyler laughed, getting the other two's attention.

"What's so funny back there?" Dallon asked in a deep voice, as if he were their father or something.

"I'm gorgeous," Elsa said before her and Tyler bursted out laughing again.

"I don't get why that's funny."

"Nothing," Tyler dismissed him. "Are we there yet?"

✨🌸✨

Tyler licked his strawberry ice cream cone while Elsa talked his ear off.

"And Ashley got me this necklace and I was like oh my gosh this is beautiful but you have to take this back because it must have costed a million dollars and she was like a million dollar necklace for a million dollar girl. Isn't that so fricken cute?"

Tyler chuckled and nodded his head. He wondered why girls talk so much. It wasn't that it bothered him, he just wondered how they always had so much to say when Tyler always had nothing. The only thing that bothered him was that he wished Josh would say something like that to him. He was jealous of his friends, even Dallon and Brendon who "didn't like each other" but totally did. Even they were nicer to each other than Josh and Tyler were.

"So I want to get her something too, but I don't know what."

"I don't know, get her jewelry or something. Girls like that, right?"

Elsa laughed as if she'd heard the funniest thing in the world. "You don't know much about girls, do you?"

"No," Tyler admitted shamelessly. "I don't need to. Girls are gross and weird."

"Hey, no they're not!"

Tyler smiled and decided he didn't want his cone anymore. "I'm just kidding, does anyone want the rest of my ice cream?"

"I'll take it!" Brendon yelled first, reaching across the table to take the only half-eaten cone.

Tyler watched Dallon while he watched Brendon. He had the biggest grin on his face and couldn't seem to take his eyes off Brendon for one second. Tyler felt a pang of jealousy. Josh used to look at him that way...

He checked his phone. It was noon, four more hours until Josh would be home. Seeing all of his friends in happy relationships made Tyler miss Josh. He wanted to cuddle with Josh, for Josh to kiss him and tell him how much he loves him.

"Tyler? You okay?"

"What? Yeah."

"You zoned out for a second."

✨🌸✨

Tyler was late.

He was supposed to leave at 4, that would put him home at 4:15, 5 minutes before Josh got home. Instead, he lost track of time while playing Mario Kart and it was now 4:10 and Tyler was about to cry because holy shit he was late.

"Oh my god, I have to," he stood up fast, rushing to the door to put his shoes on.

"Where are you going?" Dallon called after him.

"I have to go home! I'm sorry! I'll text you guys later."

Tyler ran out the door without saying anything else. He climbed on his bike and took off pedaling as fast as he could. He had to be home in 10 minutes, but it was usually a 15 minute long bike ride. His thin legs were moving as fast as they possibly could. Tyler was flying down the sidewalk, helplessly turning the handlebars every now and then to miss people that were walking.

He got home in 9 minutes, thank God, right? He threw his bike in the garage, flinching as it made a loud crash. Tyler ran inside just as he saw Josh's car turn onto their street out of the corner of his eye.

Holy fuck, he thought to himself. That was close.

Tyler sat on the couch and turned on cartoons, trying to catch his breath. In and out, in and out, nice and slow until he realized he didn't do the fucking laundry. He was breathing heavy again, hand clutched over his chest as he worried about all the things Josh was going to say to him.

The front door opened and Tyler felt like he was going to pass out. He sat on his hands to hide the fact that they were shaking. Maybe Josh forgot about the laundry.

"Tyler, I'm home," Josh announced, finding his boyfriend in the living room.

"Hi Joshy, I missed you."

"I missed you too."

Josh left, and Tyler heard him walking upstairs. Oh no. No no no. Fuck. That's where the still-full laundry basket was.

Tyler was already crying, he knew he was going to get yelled at. He sniffled, brought his knees to his chest, and buried his face between them.

"Tyler!" Josh yelled, making the already-scared boy flinch. "Get your ass upstairs right now!"

Tyler shook his head even though Josh couldn't see him. He was a shaking, crying, mess of a man when he heard heavy footsteps coming downstairs.

"Tyler, I swear to God."

"I'm sorry, Josh! Please don't yell at me! I'm sorry!"

Josh saw him already crying, and Tyler hoped it would make him feel bad. He hoped Josh's anger would be replaced with guilt and he'd say "it's okay baby, I can do it myself" but that didn't happen.

"What the hell did I tell you? I asked you to do one thing! One!"

"I-I'm s-sorry," Tyler hiccuped, cowering on the couch.

Tyler's phone dinged, because of course God just wanted to make things worse for him.

"Who was that?"

"I-I don't kno-ow..."

"Give me your phone."

"No!" Tyler cried, his hand covering his pocket.

"Give me your phone, Tyler!"

"No!"

"Are you cheating on me!?"

"No, Josh!"

"Then let me see!"

Tyler was pushed against the back of the couch, an elbow pressed into his chest. It hurt, and Tyler was crying for Josh to stop but Josh wasn't listening. He forced Tyler's legs down with his knee and took the phone out of his pocket.

"Stop, Josh! You're hurting me!"

Josh was still pinning him down, his eyes reading the name on the screen. Tyler hoped it was his mom, or something, even though his mom didn't have Snapchat.

"Who's "Beebs?" Josh asked, digging his elbow deeper into Tyler's chest.

"N-Nobody! Give me my phone!"

"No, what's your password?"

"Give me it!"

"What's your password?" Josh snapped, making Tyler gulp. There were fat tears rolling across his cheeks, his thighs and chest hurt from Josh holding him down.

"I-It's your birthday..."

Josh scoffed, as if he couldn't believe that, but input the numbers anyway. Tyler heard his phone unlock, his heart beating a mile per minute. He was going to be in deep shit.