Um, this is just a heads up, I'm improvising this story, it's not drawn or anything,
But here's another alert, the thoughts I'm putting here where my own thoughts,
Don't worry, I feel better now
LIES
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Tom's POV
It was a normal rainy day, I'm drawing, while listening to the rain
Nice calming music filled the room

Hearing the rain hit my window
Hearing the wind, swaying the trees, branches hitting the window

I started to hum the beats to the music
Drawing while listening to calming music, helps me escape reality

I look at the sketch, it was somewhat decent, not really nice though
I flip to the next blank page, starting a sketch again

I started feeling hungry, I mean I did skip breakfast, mainly cause I woke up
At 5 am

I get up and put my casual grey sweater on
I may have a heater, but sweaters are just better

I head down the wooden stairs
It's covered with a grey carpet, the stairs creaked as I put pressure to the wood

I go down to the kitchen, not picking up my feet
The floor is a nice grey floor, nothing special

I open the white clear fridge
" I have bacon, cereal, and some ham and cheese to make a sandwich"
I murmur to myself

I have a habit of talking to myself, is that weird?
I chose bacon with some eggs

I grab the uncooked bacon from the fridge and start turning the stove on
(I don't know how to make\cook bacon, so le time skip)

The bacon is done, god does it smell good
I grab another pan, I then get a bowl and a fork

I grab two eggs and then crack them
Mixing the eggs together, adding some salt

Once I'm finished mixing the eggs, I then put it on the stove
Making some cackling noises while I place it in
I let it sit there for a while

After a couple of minuets I flip it over
I repeat the action a couple more times before I take it out
"Now this looks delicious, just need some toast."

I grab some bread and I grab the toaster
(Don't judge me, but Idk what to put here as Tom is using the toaster, I haven't used it in a while, shut up)
I finished my breakfast, it was a good meal, I put my dirty dishes into the sink 'note to self, wash the dishes later'
I go to my room to get ready for school, I pass by a photo of my mother, I really miss her, though it's better living by myself then with my abusive father

I grab some dark grey pants and some checkered shoes, I get a backpack and I grab my earphones, and of course, my phone
Thanks to my step father, I was able to get a phone, I grab the charger and left my room, then I remembered something,
I go back to my room and grab both my sketchbook and homework, good thing I remembered, otherwise I was going to school without my homework, I mean, I'm a good kid and always have assignments turned in, BUT I DON'T CARE

I grab the keys and start heading out the door, I lock the door and start walking on the sidewalk, the light rain hitting my hoodie,I normally meet my friend group at the bus stop, I walk while they use the bus

I keep walking and then I see a child, the child was wearing a checkered shirt with some yellow pants, his hair was covering his eyes, where is his umbrella? Well it's light rain so he wouldn't really need it,I'll be honest, he reminded me of edd, back in middle school, he had his bangs cover his eyes

I wave hello to the child and he waves back, good thing I live in a friendly neighborhood, suddenly I felt sad, I can't explain it, but I just felt sad, the light rain, I feel like the weather right now, is expressing how I feel

I stop in my tracks, I know I won't make it to school before edd, Matt and tord, but I couldn't bring myself to step

I try to get it out of my head, but I felt so alone, like everyone around me, is secretly judging me by my eyes, I feel like, they want to hit and kick me, why?(this is how I feel and his sadness is coming out of nowhere like my sadness, this book is connections to how I feel)

It's so sudden, I feel like I'm a piece of shit, I try to walk, but my body won't let me, the kid was waving his hand in front of me, after a while I snap out of it

"Hello stranger, are you okay? I may be only 11, but I can see you're thinking hard, I'll leave you alone now."

I was left alone with my thoughts again, oh how I got the sudden urge to cut myself, ugh, hold back my thoughts, don't start thinking about mom again, she is far from earth, and I won't be able to see her again, maybe one day I'll see her again

I continue to walk to school, hoping I could meet up with my friend group, look at you, they probably think you're trash, just imagining being friends with someone who's trash, ugh, the voice in my head, yes I'm a voice in you're head, I come every time you feel like shit, and i am called depression, even though it's not my real name
(This is how the story goes, basically in this au, every time you feel like shit, a voice will be in you're head)

Frick, I'm stuck with the voice, I'm sure I'll feel more sadder then before, I reach the school building, teens are running in cause they or either racing, or are late to class, my classes don't start til 9

And it's 7:39 right now, I've got an hour and a half before I start heading to my classes,with that time, I can find edd and the group

Rain lightly kissed my face, it really isn't pouring, good thing for that, I start my search to find the group, I know they're schedules, Edd's classes start at 8, I'm guessing he's getting his stuff right now

Matt's classes start at 9 as well, and Tord's classes start at 7, He really isn't good at English, so he takes multiple classes for English, I'm not really expecting to see him, he makes you think he's a good kid, when really he's just a bad child

At least my friends aren't spoiled, Matt loves homework, I don't think I've seen him not working on his homework before, Edd loves to draw, he takes multiple art classes, and Tord, he loves guns and hates school, while me being me

I love art too, sometimes it's possible you would see me sketch a figure, I know who it is, others don't, and I like to keep it that way, I may or may not have some feelings for someone, but I mean, I'm not gay you sure about that?

Sh- shut up, you know, he probably doesn't like you, maybe he has an interest in girls and not boys, imagine him, being straight, oh wow, the pain you would go through is funny, I honestly feel b-
SHUT UP, LEAVE MY MIND VOICE!!

You do have depression, and I'm you're depression, and guess my name, sh- shadow? Nope but eh, close enough, my name is phantom, I was created when you were sad, June 20th, 2008, 11:09, you had lost you're mother, and how old were you at that age? Oh right, 6, must be hard

SHUT UP, JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!!!! Truth hurts, I'll tell you that, you, are a shy introvert, as far as I know, you'll probably be alone, til the day you die, SHUT UP PHANTOM, SHUT UP!!!!! Fine, I'll have mercy for you, just this once

With that, phantom stops talking, I want to cut myself, hoping it would release my pain, I head to the bathroom and start crying, I feel pathetic, my mother isn't here, she listens to my problems, I may listen to peoples problems, but I try to cover up the fact that I'm hurting

I feel like the less people know, the better, I don't like people knowing that I'm hurting, I don't like the attention on me, I like to listen to music without telling people how I feel, it's just better, knowing the attention isn't on you,knowing you don't have to answer questions

I wipe my eyes, I leave the stall and I wash my hands, hopefully no one notices my pain, I don't usually put my mask on, but sometimes, days like these, I have to put a mask on, I leave the bathroom and start lurking the halls to find matt, I lurk around for 30 minuets before I see him near the basketball court

I wave hello, I caught his attention, so he waves back, you can say he's athletic, he is athletic and is smarter then most of his classmates, maybe smarter then me, but I really don't mind who's smarter then me, kids have to at least past senior year, I am a sophomore, people find me fun to be around with

But I feel like if I bring out my problems, they would just abandon me, or put all the attention to me, who loves attention? Well the hoes here, most of the hoes are either sophomores or seniors, how can you spot them? They literally walk to classes in groups of 4

I haven't really figured out my sexuality, while matt, is bisexual, Edd is either gay or bi, he hasn't figured out yet, he isn't attracted to boys or girls, from all we know he's probably asexual, tord, has figured out he's bisexual, while me, I don't know yet, I'm not attracted to girls, sometimes it's guys but I get over them quickly

From my crush I have right now, I think I'm homosexual, but I mean, there isn't a girl I'm attracted here, maybe it's probably because I haven't met the person yet, mayb- oh shut up tom, you are gay, c'mon, you're attracted to a guy who is bisexual, shut up and check the time

phantom is kinda right I'm always right mmm, yea sure you are, I say sarcastically, I don't like it when you read my mind phantom, oh please, I'm going to come for you when you don't know it, get used to it, phantom is right, I have to get used to him, popping in my mind when I'm sad

I walk up to matt and hug him, Matt isn't really a hugger, if anything he would just shake hands, he takes off his glasses and smiles,, hopefully he will find his significant other before the school year ends, since he is a junior, I think he'll find the perfect significant other, since most girls go for seniors

I think it's better if he has a boyfriend, if he does get a boyfriend, i think they can understand his feelings, and calm him down, I hear heels clicking the floor, I pull from the hug and turn around and see the bitch, Diana tea Larson, sister of tord Larson, Diana heads up to me "wow girls, never thought we would see this advice giver outside of class"

Diana may be popular, but she acts like a bitch and bosses everyone around, I roll my eyes and whisper "yay, the bitch is here" she must've heard me whispering "what the fuck did you just say?" She grabs my sweater and starts saying things she'll do to me, it isn't as bad from the things I do to myself

I hit her boob and she screams in pain (I use the pain I feel ;)) she lets go of my sweater, so I start booking it to my locker, I'm glad I was able to get away from her
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Wow, I got the book finished, yay, 2040 words not including this A/N, I know all through this chapter was only Tom's point of view, the next chapter I'll try to make it to edd, Matt, and tord's pov, BYE