Chapter 2

I tried to concentrate on the page again, after losing my concentration for the 7th time. 'you are where you are supposed to be and in every moment there is an opportunity to serve another or to receive support..' I read, while trying to memorize it. I wanted to have everything permanently marked in my mind. This book was just magical, that goes deep into your soul, trying to grab the hands of the things you buried deep down. I closed the book without putting a bookmark on where I was and read the title. 'Invisible Acts of Power'. It was true. The bo-

"Hey, miscreation" I heard someone from beside me. I rolled my eyes and put my book in my bag. His voice was full with so much madness that no one could recognize it anymore. My brother. Although he is only brother by name. We just.. we just didn't click. He has never liked me and I never thought of it. Its not like I need it and nor does he need it. Everything they said went one ear in and the other out. 'It doesn't hurt, stop it' I said to myself, trying to come up with reasons in my mind that it indeed did not hurt, when they were saying things again. I stood up, wanting to get out of here. The library was my favourite place in school, unless they were here to ruin the dust that covered the books from its age.

"Where are you going? The fun was just about to start, right guys?" I heard Black say to his friends. I looked up at him and saw him smirking. We didn't look alike, not even a tiny bit. Not from the outside and not from the inside. He is Black. Power is important to him. Being stubborn, independent and mean are his first priorities. The lack of emotion is the one thing that makes him who he is. He is the complete opposite of black. Someone with a black personality is serious, is dedicated. Is negatively protective; trying to comfort anyone in the tough ways possible. Black keeps always a distance, creating an aura of mystery and intrigue. Black won't enjoy life, won't have fun. Black would put their loved ones in a cage, just to protect them. But he, he was nothing like that. Emotions, feelings- everything was taken away from his heart. Bad blood was running through his veins, that was as cold as the snow that would hurt your head when you lie in the snow too much. My mind connected with Earth again when I heard them laugh.

"She spaced out again. Wouldn't want to live in your head. God knows what freakishly things are going through your mind" he said. I just smirked looking to the side.

"I am happy that we are on the same boat then" I said while looking him deadly in the eyes. I was never scared of him. He might've bullied me for years, said the worst things possible- even stabbed me that led me to a surgery, but it didn't make me scared of him. I was only scared of myself. Nothing has an affect on me, but just myself. I have the power to choose what if affecting me and what not. I have it in my own hand to let them get to me or not. And I, I am not letting them. I looked at his friends and thought about how pathetic they were. Always doing what Black said, without backing out. Never being able to say their own opinions or do what they like to do- except for one. I looked him in the eyes. He never laughed, never said anything. I had never heard his voice. He never helped and never did what Black told him, even though he was always behind him. He was different between them all and he would never do anything Black says. But still, he never leaves their sides. Noah.

I closed my eyes for a second, blocking my mind from all the things I witnessed, and walked away, needing fresh air while ignoring them.

"Hey, you okay?" I jumped a bit when I heard the voice from behind me. I turned around to the voice that always made my body relax and saw that it was Seda. She put her hand on my shoulder. I shook her hand off, feeling uncomfortable.

"Yes" I said. It had to be like that , right? We built a wall around that question. You could only respond with a yes. You don't dare to say no- that's not how it works. You are supposed to say yes, even though it is the complete opposite.

"Good is that which there is no evil in, it is thankfulness with relief, and patience with problems, how many are those who have a blessing and are not thankful? And how many are those who are faced with problems and are not patient?" I kept silent when Seda said this. She was always saying things at the right moment and I didn't always know what she meant and that's why I always kept silent. I closed my eyes and ears to what she said, but still, the words always seem to be permanent marked in my mind. They were always there just when I needed it. I closed my eyes and then walked away. The weather was the opposite of my mind. The soft wind touched my face every now and then and the colour of my surroundings were bright. I walked past a garden and hold my bag closer to me. I kept walking til I reached it. I looked at it. It looked more beautiful in this weather. To me, one of the most beautiful yet terrifying things are roses. Everytime I see one, I want to get closer and get a smell of it. The smell is so mesmerizing that you want to get a fragrance of it. But when you look closely, the rose has thorns. Thorns who aren't your skin's best friend. Thorns can hurt you and let you bleed when you least expect it. This is the stage that happens when you touch a rose. It doesn't want to be touched nor does it want to be ripped from home. The leaves will turn into an ugly colour the moment you take it from its home. The red or pink colour will fade and an old brown one will appear. Leave by leave will the most beautiful thing turn into beaten, torn and scarred. It would feel naked, as if everything- every secret of it is going around places it shouldn't be. It will let go of itself and won't look after itself anymore. The instinct of protecting itself will walk away slowly. Brown will be the only thing that recognizes it. And when it thinks that it has no energy anymore, the rose would become hurt and would be mad at life. So mad, that it won't ever forgive life nor take a step into life ever again..

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Random Fact: the last part of the chapter comes straight from my diary.