It was dark when you woke up, the main light in the room turned off. It was eerie, especially after everything that had just happened throughout the bunker. Your body felt stiff, your stomach sore, and you realized why. You remembered hiding in your room, when Dean came after you. You remembered throwing holy water on him, and running for Sam, who kept you with him. But then you remembered the worst part, Dean sneaking up behind you, cutting into your body as he teased Sam, before plunging the knife into your belly.

Pulling back the covers, you gasped at your naked torso, covered in cuts and bruises. You were tired of seeing your body like this. It seems like for the last half year you were always bloody or bruised, and you were done with being a victim, always being sore.

There was a note next to you on the nightstand, along with a glass of water and some pain relieving pills. You reached for the light, moaning as the movement irritated your side. Switching the light on, you grabbed the pills, downing them with a long drink of water. After the glass was empty, you turned your attention to the note, written on an old motels notepad, one of many that you and the boys had taken during your trips.

Cas will be checking up on you periodically.
When you wake up, please don't come looking for us
I will let you know what happens.

The note was short and to the point, not that you expected anything different. Sam was busy trying to take care of you, and cure his brother, all at the same time, which was a lot to take on for one person. You felt guilty that Sam had to take time out to take care of you.

It was then the door quietly opened, and a dark haired angel stuck his head inside. You smiled, happy to see him, you had always liked the awkward angel.

"How are you feeling?" He asked you, coming inside the room and shutting the door.

"Like I was stabbed by a knife." You said truthfully, because right now your entire body ached, and the wound in your stomach was hot and painful.

Well, you did." He told you. "Sam told me to come check on you. I can also heal you now if you would like." He said, coming forward to do just that.

You reached up and grabbed his wrist, stopping him from healing you. "Don't."

He seemed confused, his vibrant blue eyes squinting in confusion. "But I have my grace back. Well, technically not my grace, but I do have enough power to heal you. You don't have to worry about me."

You shook your head, still not wanting him to heal you. "You need to save it, to use it to deal with Dean. He may get loose again, or he may need healing after he's cured. Please, save it for him." You whispered.

Truthfully, you didn't feel like you needed to be healed. The pain was a reminder that you had screwed up, that it was probably all your fault that these things had happened to you. If you hadn't been so emotional, or so reckless and ran away, you wouldn't have had all these bad things happen to you. You never could blame Dean for any of it.

"Please Y/N, I know it has to hurt." He asked again, but you adamantly refused. Sighing, he sat down on the chair across from the bed, his arms on his knees.

"How is he Cas?" You asked, your words quiet but still conveying your concern.

"I don't know. We are almost done, but both Sam and I wonder if it's killing him." Cas answered truthfully as he stood up. "And I should be getting back. It's very taxing on Sam, and I want to be there when and if he needs help."

You nodded, before thanking him for checking on you. "And Cas, I'm fine. Please don't you and Sam worry about me at all. Keep your focus on him please."

Cas nodded, his hand on the door. "Thank you Y/N."

As soon as he left, a plan formed in your head. You knew it was stupid, and ridiculous, but once it found its way inside, you couldn't let it go. You slowly pulled the covers back, breathing a sigh of relief upon seeing the bandage still white. You were still in your sleep bottoms, what was left of your shirt lying in the trash. However Sam had a t-shirt laying on top of his dresser, and as soon as your legs would hold you, you reach for it, wincing slightly when you pulled it over your head.

Your legs a little wobbly from blood loss and exhaustion, you slowly made your way to the door, opening it and glancing down the hallway. Looking both ways, it was completely silent, and you moved down the hallway, towards your room, grateful the dungeon was on the other end of it.

Reaching your room, you shuddered as you looked at the broken remains of your door, splinters of wood splattered inside and outside your room. Stepping through the wide hole, you began your task, grabbing a pair of jeans, wiggling them on, groaning when it shook your wound.

You started going through all the contents that had been thrown on your bed, quickly finding your duffel bag from the last hunt you had been on. It was still full of clothing and toiletries. Throwing some weapons and other useful items in it, you turned to the rest of your belongings, looking for a certain item. Finding it, you grabbed the book, opening it up to show your secret stash of credit cards, cash and fake ids. Not even Sam or Dean knew about this hiding spot, or these aliases.

Grabbing a pen and paper, you quickly scratched a note, leaving It on top of your bed.

I'm sorry to leave you like this,
But I really think it's for the best.
Sam, thank you for everything you have done for me,
I will always appreciate and love you.
Dean, I hope the cure worked, and if it did,
Please don't blame yourself, I don't.
I love you, and I always will, but it was time
For me to move on.
With all of my love and heart,
Y/N.

Throwing a coat on, moaning as the movement pulled against your stitches, you grabbed the duffle bag, and made your way into the hallway once again, turning away from the main part, and heading towards the garage.

There, parked in the corner, was your baby. Opening the door, you winced at the fine layering of dust covering your cherry red mustang. You felt bad, even before you had been kidnapped, you had neglected your car preferring to ride with Dean, and you prayed she would start.

Finding the keys in the console where you had left them, you turned it in the igniton, praying in your head that she would turn over. It took two tries, but soon she was running, just as smoothly as the last time you had driven her.

With tears in your eyes, you pointed her past the Impala, pulling out of the opening, and onto the country road, away from the city. You had no destination in mind, you just knew you needed to get away. You wiped away the tears, knowing you were doing everyone a favor, you were a liability to everyone.