You came to with a start, your heart thumping loudly in your chest as flashbacks of what had just happened played through your mind. Glancing around wildly, you noticed instantly that you were no longer in the torn up library of the bunker. You were laying on the bed in the room you shared with Dean. You were no longer in your bloody clothes, one of Dean's t-shirts was the only thing covering your bruised and cut up skin.

Your entire body hurt. From the torturing from Eldon, to the attack from Dean, your body was completely black and blue, your thigh throbbing from the gash in it. You had no idea who brought you here, or cleaned you up, or what happened to Cas or Dean. 

Needing to use the bathroom, you started to slide off the bed, the movement making you groan and lay back. "Damn it." You muttered.

It was then the door slowly opened, and Sam poked his head inside. When he saw you laying there, awake, he came inside, perching at the edge of the bed. His eyes were dark and somber as they took you in, and you knew you must look a sight.

"How are you feeling?" He asked you.

"Like I was hit by a bus." You muttered. "But Sam, what happened?" 

Before he answered you, he helped you up into a sitting position, handing you a glass of water. Taking a sip, you felt a little bit better, the water quenching your thirst.

"What do you remember?" He asked you, sitting back down on the bed next to you.

"I remember Cas dropping me off, then getting caught by Eldon. He tied me to a chair, hurt me a little bit. And then Dean showed up." You started to say, but when you got to the part about Dean you froze. Just thinking about how he had been covered in blood, his eyes void of life had you pulling the blanket up farther, your body shivering.

"It's okay." Sam comforted you, and you went on.

"He was Dean, but the Mark had affected him something fierce. He was dull, as if his life had been snuffed out of him and only the Mark remained. He didn't even seem to care if I lived or died. All he wanted was revenge." You told him.

"I feared his quest for revenge would only feed the Mark. I hate that I was right." Sam answered.

"He shot Eldon, and I pleaded with him to leave the boy alone, but he didn't care. He shot him, then Cas showed up. We tried to help him, to talk him down from wherever he was. But he was too far gone, and he attacked both me and Cas. It wasn't pretty. Where is he?" You asked.

Sam sighed, resting his head in his hands. "He's gone. I have no idea where. He found the tracker, took it off. Rowena is translating the book, but I don't know what to do." He admitted.

"Sam, we can't have Dean running around. Who knows what he will do, who he will turn on." You told him, tears filling your eyes at the look he gave you.

"Don't you think I don't know that? I know at any moment he could kill someone else, but I don't know what to do. Dean's good at hiding when he wants to." Sam told you, his voice cracking with emotion.

You felt bad that Sam had all of this on his shoulders. He didn't deserve to have to worry about you, his brother, and everything else. You leaned forward, ignoring all the aches and pains that accompanied the movement, wrapping your arms around him, pressing your head against his back. "Sam, I know you are doing the best you can. Hell, you're even working with an evil witch to save him!"

"Yeah, and what good has that gotten me? A royally pissed off brother and a dead friend." He muttered.

"Sam, you won't give up. It isn't in you to give up on your brother." You told him.

You felt him sigh, and you leaned back, so he could look at you again. "And you? You won't give up on Dean either, will you? After everything the two of you have been through, you can't let something like this get to you."

You sighed, knowing at some point this conversation would come to this. However, you weren't ready to answer it, not yet. "I don't want to give up. I really don't. But I'm so tired, and scared. Sam, you didn't see him, his eyes, his lack of caring. I'm not sure how many more times I can take Dean knocking me down." You admitted, tears in your eyes at thought of letting Dean down.

Sam stared at you, his eyes full of pain and sadness. "It's your choice Y/N. And I'm not going to be upset at whichever one you end up picking. If you decide you can't, then I want you to know you have a home here as long as you need it. But if you decide you want to help, there will always be a place by my side. You're like a sister to me, and I will always love you, not matter what you pick. But think about it, because I will be at the warehouse, hoping for your help." He told you, standing up and giving you a sad smile before opening the door.

"Sam." You said, stopping him. "Thank you. I love you too. You're the best friend I could have asked for. But right now, I think I need some time on my own, to think things through." You told him, the twitching of his cheek letting you know he had heard you.

Without another word, he left you alone in your room, and you curled into a ball, the pain a welcoming reminder that you were alive. It wasn't only your body that was bruised, but your heart. You loved Dean, more than anything in this world. The two of you had been through so much, had fought so hard to stay together, that you felt horrible for staying back. But then you remembered the sight of his eyes, and how he had almost allowed Eldon to kill you, and you weren't sure you could face that Dean again. 

Tears falling down your cheeks, you tried to calm your breathing, knowing you shouldn't make any decisions while this emotional. But you knew, come morning, you would have to decide. Do you give up on Dean, your only chance at love? Or do you fight to get the man you loved back, even if that means your death in the end? Because the Dean that beat you, and Cas, wouldn't hesitate in killing you.