https://youtu.be/49tpIMDy9BE

*Shelby's mind*

I pirouette in the dark
I see the stars through me
Tired mechanical heart
Beats til the song disappears

Somebody shine a light

I'm frozen by the fear in me

Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me
So cut me from the line
Dizzy, spinning endlessly
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me!

Shatter me!
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me!

If only the clockworks could speak
I wouldn't be so alone
We burn every magnet and spring
And spiral into the unknown

Somebody shine a light
I'm frozen by the fear in me
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me
So cut me from the line
Dizzy, spinning endlessly
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me!

Shatter me!
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me!

If I break the glass, then I'll have to fly
There's no one to catch me if I take a dive
I'm scared of changing, the days stay the same
The world is spinning but only in gray
If I break the glass, then I'll have to fly
There's no one to catch me if I take a dive
I'm scared of changing, the days stay the same
The world is spinning but only in gray
(Only)

Somebody shine a light
I'm frozen by the fear in me
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me
So cut me from the line
Dizzy, spinning endlessly
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me!
Shatter me!
Somebody make me feel alive
And shatter me!

'"Megatron is...was my master. My leader. But he decided to bring back Starscream, who let the Autobots kill my twin brother then brought him back with dark energon. Desecrating his grave." He looked down as he said the last part. Clearly still upset about the situation. I stood up in his hand. Wishing I was closer, so I could try and comfort him. "I'm so sorry Dreadwing. I know what it's like to lose a loved one. Is Megatron the one who killed you?" I wondered. Though I don't think I should of asked. "Yes he was." He looked at her. His face showing sadness and anger. ' I still remember that day like it was yesturday. I sit against a wall. The area around me is in complete darkness. Across on the other wall is a movie screen that takes up the whole wall. All that was missing is popcorn and a soda, oh and those comfy movie theater seats. I watch my memories flash up on the screen. I have no idea what is going on. I don't know why this is happening, but I don't mind. I like watching my memories. At least all the happy ones anyway. 

Ten year old me popped up on the screen. I looked so happy then. 'I was walking out to the barn to take care of the animals. Dad told me I needed to help too. I kicked up some rocks on my way, making a small dust cloud. "Shelby pick up your feet, we got cows to feed." I heard my father yell from the barn. "Yes, father." I yell back. I pick up my feet and run to the barn. He already had the buckets of feed ready for me. I picked up one and had to drag it, since it was so heavy. I gave a few grunts trying to take it to the other end of the barn. The bucket then became lighter. I looked up and my father was holding on to the handle, helping me carry it. I gave him a huge smile and he smiled back. "You'll be able to carry it in no time." He assured me. I gave him a nod. We got to the other end and he let go. I set the bucket down, rolled it on its side and began to pour it into the trough.'

Helping my dad was one of the best times of the day. Being the youngest I never really got a lot of time with him. So once I was old enough to work in the barn, it was more time to spend with him. As my other siblings got older, they started to do their own thing. When my two oldest brothers were out of school and got married they were never really around anymore. Except for  holidays or sometimes just to come over for dinner on the weekends. Knowing what I know now, I don't know if I would of really enjoyed those times had i knew what he was really doing. I miss the father I used to know. Part of me wants to know if he's still alive but the other part wants nothing to do with him. He ruined not only my life, but our whole family. Did he ever really care?

'"Come on losers, we got to get this equipment ready. We are one month away from walking on sand all day." I yelled over the group of Soldiers in front of me. I heard a few groans from a few in the back. "Yes I know its gonna suck, and its going to suck more because we will all be split up. So, lets get going." I continued. Though it only caused more groaning. The newbies were pretty excited to be deploying. I had already been their once. This time i would be leading a group of engineers. "Cpl, do you know which platoons we will be with yet?" Asked Private Brost. "I should be getting the list either today or tomorrow." I answered. He gave a thumbs up and went to start cleaning and putting equipment away. We were going to be sending it all early. So it would be waiting for us when we got their. Three of my men would be leaving with it, so nothing got damaged or missing. I wanted to go with them, but i was told i need to go with the main group. "You ready for this weekend Cpl." One of my lances asked me. "You know it. Last big party before we go on leave next week." I hollered. "Lets get this party started!" Mitchel yelled from the back of the armory. We all broke out into laughter.'

I looked at all their smiling faces in front of me on the giant screen. They never knew what was going to happen to them. They had no idea that most of them weren't going to come back. That they would never see their families again. They all looked hopeful and happy. All their trust was in me to bring them back and I failed them. Tears wanted to stream down my face but none exited my eyes. I had none left to cry. More memories of us together showed up. There was the time at the range when we were trying out a new weapon. Fisher didn't realize how bad the kick on it would be. Though I don't think any of us did. He flew back almost five feet. Broke his tailbone from that. He wasn't able to do physical training with us for weeks. As much as I felt bad for him, it was hilarious. 

'"C...CV239...This....F....17...F...1718...." Static starts to come through the com. "F1718 This is CV239 copy." The commander said back into the radio. Worry could be heard in his voice. "Under...ack..Hurry." We are to late. I jump out of the vic, barely hearing the yelling from my commander to get back in the truck. I have to find my platoon. It looks like whoever did this is long gone now. I'm running though looking for survivors. Dead bodies are scattered everywhere. Friendly and enemy. At their tent, one of my men, four shots right though his chest. Blood seeping though. He's lost so much. I bend down and pick up his head and move it onto my lap. He's still warm. I was to late. I should of been here sooner. I look over to my right, under some rubble, I see my senior corporal. His heads been crushed in. After sitting there for a few minutes, the sounds of bullets rang. We immediately stand up and get our weapons ready. They stop for a moment. I look around, nothing. None of us see anything. Then its heard again, and this time we hear a thump of a body hitting the ground. The enemy is still here.'

'The bullets rang' The worst day of my life. Four of my men died that day. Four good men. They had a future, they had families. They had everything and it was all gone in less then a day. I didn't get to them in time. I wasn't able to save them. It kills me everyday, knowing I'm alive and they aren't. Their families were heartbroken. Though they never blamed me. One wife did, but after the initial shock, she apologized to me. Though I don't think I deserved it. It was my fault. They should blame me. I should of never came back home. I should of died with them. Yet here I am, fighting to stay alive. Now that I have a reason to live. I wish Dreadwing was here with me. I miss him. I want him to hold me and tell me everything is okay. We never even got to share a kiss after out date. We both knew we wanted too, but the Decepticons have to ruin everything. 

'I remember feeling him slowly wrapped his hand around mine. His hand shaking as he tried to hold on tight. I remember feeling his lips brush against my hand as he placed a small kiss. "I promise I won't let go. I promise I will always be here. I will be here when you awake. I promise." His voice soft and sweet.' He always keeps his promises. I hope if I ever get out of this darkness, he will be there waiting for me. '"Please lay with me?" I asked through sniffles. He looked down at me and gave me a small smile. "Of course." He said calmly. I felt like my heart was going to fly out of my chest. We laid down in the small hospital bed. "Thank you." I said softly. "For what?" He asked. I grabbed ahold of his shirt. "Being here." I finally answered after a few moments. "I will always be here for you." He kissed my forehead. I have never felt more safe in my life.' 

https://youtu.be/ggRTPpvXuno

There's gotta be another way out
I've been stuck in a cage with my doubt
I've tried forever getting out on my own
But every time I do this my way
I get caught in the lies of the enemy
I lay my troubles down
I'm ready for you now

Bring me out
Come and find me in the dark now
Everyday by myself I'm breaking down
I don't wanna fight alone anymore
Bring me out
From the prison of my own pride
My God I need a hope I can't deny
In the end I'm realizing
I was never meant to fight on my own

Every little thing that I've known
Is every thing I need to let go
You're so much bigger than the world I have made
So I surrender my soul
I'm reaching out for your hope
I lay my weapons down
I'm ready for you now

Bring me out
Come and find me in the dark now
Everyday by myself I'm breaking down
I don't wanna fight alone anymore
Bring me out
From the prison of my own pride
My God I need a hope I can't deny
In the end I'm realizing
I was never meant to fight on my own

I don't wanna be incomplete
I remember what you said to me
I don't have to fight alone

Bring me out
Come and find me in the dark now
Everyday by myself I'm breaking down
I don't wanna fight alone anymore
Bring me out
From the prison of my own pride
My God I need a hope I can't deny
In the end I'm realizing
I was never meant to fight on my own

The words flowed out of me, like a waterfall. My heartbeat seemed to pick up pace. I was done being alone. I'm tired of my mind taking control of me and everything I want to be. I just want to live life again. Is that so hard to ask. I stand up and push myself off of the wall, walking forward, closer to the screen. I need to get out of here. Memories flashed. Light started blinding me. The memories started to flash faster and faster. To the point I couldn't tell what was going on. I couldn't focus on it. Something seemed to be opening, though I couldn't tell what. My hand was in front of my face blocking the bright light. Voices could be heard around me. I can't recognize them. They seemed muffled and far away. Then I heard it. The voice I've been craving.

"Shelby?" Dreadwings questioned, worry showing in his voice.