Unedited shit, but im honestly too tired to change it. Im sorry for the long wait. When the weekend comes, I'll be able to update more frequently. 

5 years later

XXXVI: Jungkook

It had been five years.

Five years since I met Taehyung.

Five years since the war.

Five years since I became a vampire.

In those years, my life had been uprooted and changed completely, though, perhaps for the better.

The horrors of the war had stayed with me throughout the years, and sometimes I would wake up from nightmares crying and sweating. Every time, Taehyung had been there to hug me tight and whisper away the bad memories, staying with me until I fell asleep again. The next morning, I would find a cup of herbal tea at my bedside, along with a vial of a calm-inducing elixir. Taehyung would usually leave before I woke up, but he always left something on my bedside table. Sometimes it was a flower. Other times it was a note. Each time, it left me with a fuzzy feeling in my chest.

On a more painful topic, I had asked Taehyung to remove my existence from the mind of my parents, lest they go crazy with worry. He had accepted, and even though I saw clear reluctance on his face, he knew why I had to do it. But it was still very hard for me to watch them laugh with each other or talk about having kids without realizing that once, they had had a son. A son who was now a vampire living in another dimension.

I visited them frequently during the first year, just like Taehyung had visited me before. But when I realized that by doing so, I was only worsening the pain, my visits started to dwindle out. It didn't make the pain any less harder to bear until more than three years had passed. By then, there were so many things to do that I probably couldn't find time to visit my parents even if I still did. The only thing that I allowed myself to keep was the music box from my mother, which I had taken from our house long ago. I played it every night, and Taehyung would sometimes come to listen to it with me. He always said that the melody was beautiful.

I had also become more or less used to being a vampire as well as becoming queen of a clan. Drinking blood had become second nature to me, and I no longer thought of it as disgusting. I learned quickly that there were many responsibilities attached to becoming queen, such as attending annual meetings with the rulers of other clans. The first time I went, I was quite the topic of conversation: the king of the largest clan had finally found a queen after more than 300 years of searching.

Surprisingly, no one seemed to care much about me having human origins. It was either because they genuinely didn't mind, or courtesy of the fact that Taehyung's scim was resting on the wall next to him throughout the meeting, the blade shining as if still drenched in blood. It also didn't help that on my first year, the king of another clan tried to kiss me without my consent. Let us just say that he was unfortunate enough to meet the wrong side of Taehyung's blade. It landed him in the healing center for weeks.

Nobody tried to flirt with me after that.

But lately, Taehyung had become a bit more distant, spending more time in his office or talking to Yoongi in hushed tones. He barely ever showed up for breakfast anymore, and usually spent most of his days with the door. But whenever I asked him about it, he would only smile and say that he was fine. I was no fool; I knew that he was hiding something.

The question was, what?

XXXVI: Taehyung

It hurts.

Bleeding hell, it hurts.

The darkness is like rainwater, pressing against the edges of my mind, threatening to burst like a dam. Recently, it's been getting worse, and trying to occupy myself with paperwork isn't helping. I groan, digging my pencil into the paper as another bout of pain flows from my mind.

Stop resisting. The voice of the monster fills my head, and the pencil I'm writing with breaks. You know you want it. Why can you not embrace it?

Because you're a vile creature of darkness, I say. I remember clearly what happened last time. You won't best me again.

And you're a perfect angel? The monster laughs. Please. If your sins were blood, the whole city of London would run red. You know you can't stop my rising. At best, you will only delay it. Is all this pain really worth a few days? Weeks? In the end, I will prevail.

"Tae?"

A voice at the door distracts me, and for one blissful moment, the monster is calmed. Jungkook steps into the room, surveying the papers on my desk and the dark circles underneath my eyes with a frown. He sets the wildwood tea he brought on my desk and pulls a chair up beside me, looking at me with those wide concerned eyes.

"Tae, are you really okay? These past few weeks, you've seemed a bit... off. You know you can talk to me about anything that's bothering you. I'll listen." He sits forward in his chair, hair falling over his forehead. He's always been curious, and that hasn't changed throughout the years. It was usually delightful, but not when I was trying hard to conceal something from him. I put on a smile, reaching out to brush his hair away from his eyes.

"Everything's fine―"

"No it isn't!" I'm surprised at Jungkook's outburst. "Don't think I haven't noticed how you seem to get tireder every day. Or how you sometimes have conversations with yourself when you think no one's looking." He takes my hand in his. "I'm your soulmate, Taehyung. I won't judge you. Please. Just tell me what's wrong."

"Jungkook..." I hesitate. I want to tell him so badly about the monster, the darkness. Spill out everything and ask for his advice. But I had clearly seen the disgust and horror written on his face when he saw my mask. And the monster was 100 times worse. I could imagine how he would react when he found out. Of course, he knew about the existence of the monster, but to him, it was some sort of myth; he had never actually seen it take control. Plus, it had been five years since I last told him. It wasn't odd to assume that he had forgotten.

"I'm sorry. I can't tell you. It would―"

"So there is something wrong!" Jungkook says, and I want to curse myself. When I don't deny it, he sighs, squeezing our entwined hands gently.

"Oh Tae," Jungkook murmurs. "Don't keep it bottled up. My mother always said that telling someone your worries can help ease the strain. I can help you. We'll get through whatever is bothering you together. I love you, Tae. It's the least I can do for you."

I crack a smile at his sweet words, but it disappears as fast as it came. It wasn't just his disgust that stopped me from telling him. Lately, the nightmare battlefield has become more and more prominent in my mind, sometimes even flashing through my dreams. Every time, Jungkook's lifeless form is embedded in my mind. Every time, I see the raw red line that cuts across his throat. I couldn't drag him into my problems. He was so sweet, so willing to help, that it would only lead to disastrous consequences. Consequences that could result in death.

"I'm sorry." I ease my hands out of his grip. "My telling you will only hurt you in the end. Trust me on this one. I can handle this on my own."

Jungkook looks like he wants to say something, but then closes his mouth. We sit in silence for a few seconds before he finally nods. "If that's what you really want." His voice is heavy. "But if you ever change your mind, I'm always here."

"I know." I pick up the cup of tea, lifting it to my mouth. It's slightly more bitter than usual, with a tangy scent to it. But it's still warm, filling me with a homely feeling as I clutch the cup in my hands.

"Did Jin make this?"

Jungkook shakes his head. "No. I made it. Jin was out doing some errand. I―I hope it isn't too bitter. I think I may have used the wrong tea leaves."

"It's perfect," I say, trying hard to ignore the now supremely bitter taste spreading through my mouth. But it's worth it when Jungkook gives me his happy smile that makes my heart melt. Only my family had ever made me feel this loved in my life. At least, before Jungkook came. Only my family―

I stand up so quickly that my cup of tea wobbles dangerously in my hands, nearly spilling over the edge. Jungkook looks on, confused, as I put the cup on my desk and begin haphazardly folding the papers I'm working on.

"I―I need to go somewhere."

Jungkook lifts an eyebrow. "More work with the door?"

"No. I just want to visit someone." I say, and he must have seen the determination in my eyes, because he nods. "Then I'll finish up this paperwork. There's only about three pages left anyway."

"Thank you," I give him a quick kiss on the head, smiling at how a blush spreads across his cheeks, before exiting the room. I walk up the stairs until I reach a familiar glass door, with a small gold key. Twisting it open, I reveal a garden of red roses, their petals carpeting the floor like a blanket. Gathering some into a bouquet, I approach the two tombstones in the middle, tracing my fingers gently over the worn-out engravings.

My parent's final resting place.

"Mother. Father." I bow to the tombstones in turn, laying the bouquet of flowers on the ground. The flower petals lift lazily in the breeze flowing in from a nearby window, while I sit down in front of the slabs of stone, a thousand thoughts running through my head. I have so much I want to tell them, yet so little time. I cannot be sure when the waves of pain will start again.

"I-I don't know what to do," I finally say, looking down at my hands. "The monster keeps getting stronger every day while I become weaker. I know I won't be able to hold it off for long. Not in this state. But there must be something I can do to stop it from rising. I can't just sit and watch while everything I love crumbles to dust by my hand! And how am I supposed to protect my soulmate when I am the one who poses the greatest threat to him? What can I do to ensure that he stays safe?"

The tombstones give no reply, standing still in the ground. I sigh. I wasn't expecting any answer to my problems, but I had hoped that my parents could somehow guide me through this mess I had created. It was a stupid wish, I now realize, but it was my last hope. Now, truthfully, I just didn't know what to do. How I could possibly do anything to stop the darkness from inevitably taking over?

I could spare Jungkook, you know. The voice of the monster suddenly fills my head, and I start. There's something changed about the voice. It's not exactly kind, but is lacking the malice that it usually has. If he's your soulmate, he's mine as well. I don't exactly want to hurt him. Perhaps you and I can make a deal. If you hand over control in the next three days, I can promise that no harm shall come to the people you love. That includes everyone in the castle now. Your soulmate, friends, family―everyone.

Jungkook... he would be saved? I can almost see the monster nodding his head. And my people? I press. Will they all be safe from you too? All the vampires that live in the Sirius kingdom... do you vow that you won't kill any of them?

A pause. Then, I promise that too. No harm shall come to your subjects. I won't attack any of them. But that is as far as my deal extends. And you must decide quickly. I want an answer by sundown tomorrow. Don't be late. Before I can reply, the voice goes silent, and I sense that the monster is dormant again. Though for how long, it can't be known. My mind is still spinning from the offer I received; whether to accept, or decline and take my chances. Slowly rising on my knees, I bow again to my parents, before turning.

 As I walk, I can't help but think that the red rose petals littering the floor look unsettlingly like a carpet of blood. 

Also, one of my friends made this, and I think it looks pretty cool. He used a site called blender.