Midna: We'rE bAcK BiTcHeS

Urbosa: screw you, you really like to keep a girl waiting

Midna: So you're ready to come?

Urbosa: Tell me where did you run off to?
You never answered any of my questions.

Midna: Quite the inpatient one aren't we? I wonder where you get that from?

Urbosa: My mom

Midna: I was gonna say Ganon he has quite the temper too.

Urbosa: how dare you compare me to Ganon, he and I are not the same

Midna: Well, I could care less about Ganon

Urbosa: How does that make me feel any better?

Midna: How does you're hair stay up like that is the question

Urbosa: Why do you care?

Midna: Since apparently you think my hair chokes me

Urbosa: not as bad as you're cleavage

Midna: You're jealous clearly

Urbosa: Where are my friends?

Midna: That I'd wish I had the answer to.

Urbosa: You lie through your teeth! You're besmirching only yourself, augmenting pure accusations all for what purpose, your MaJeStY

Midna: Tehe heh heh, besmirch you say? Really with all your notions of being aplomb of all times. Doesn't a pathetic destiny weigh upon you as we speak? In five days time you will fail. Forever feel what it's like to be trapped and remain a shadow in your own realm.

Urbosa: I will not fail!

Midna: I'm not finished!

Urbosa: ...

Midna: The Twili were once Hylians, Zora, Gerudo, Gorons as well! You banished us but then again not all of you are insufferable. It's quite ironic though don't you think? The Twilight mirror has been repaired, so that's how I am now in your realm. The hour of Ganon draws near and that wretched bastard calls upon my forces, but to give him my rule would be a bunch of ludicrously! It would be blasphemous for my subjects to have to listen to a King who has no interest other than his own.

Although my world will not be affected by the tragedy that will befall you and you're adoring fans!

Ha! In fact I see it very clearly like how I saw the outcome of the last trifle. The Zora will fall never to claim her love. The Rito will vanquish his opponent but his pride will be his downfall. The Goron will be the first to bow. The Gerudo will fight valiantly but live with the taste of defeat. Should I keep going?

Urbosa: You're full of it. Enough with you're caterwauling! You contextually think you have us figured out, but do NOT count us out! We will not go down without a fight.

Midna: Hmph
You're a stubborn one I'll give you that

Urbosa: An opponent that never gives up, is the most challenging opponent to beat

Midna: Fair enough
Linkie is fine I just wanted to say hi to him

Urbosa: How do you know his name?

Midna: I knew my love in the last life

Urbosa: Wait you and L-Link?

Midna: By Twili, don't get weird on me! It's not the Link you know but the one that I know

Urbosa: That's confusing

Midna: Isn't life?

Urbosa: Where's the rest of my friends?

Midna: The Princess is fine, she is in her quarters

Urbosa: This whole time?

Midna: yah

Urbosa: What about Mipha? Daruk? Revali?

Midna: Oh, I had to step messing with that one. Mipha's so susceptible to the twilight it's not even funny. Daruk fell asleep on a mountain, and Revali is just fun to pluck feathers to make myself a pillow.

Urbosa: only I get to mess with Revali

Midna: It's so cute that I could ship it, but you won't be around much longer

Urbosa: watch where you step! Last time I checked you lived underneath like a troll

Midna: Ha! Maybe it's the other way around if you think about it

Urbosa: You wish!

Midna: This is the start of a beautiful friendship🥰

Urbosa: go fuck yourself

Midna: I have but it's not as satisfying when my lover did it for me

Urbosa: You really are tempestuous on so many levels.

Midna: Really? Don't you cause sandstorms with the snap of your fingers?

Urbosa:😨🙄 it was one time and I didn't know that my lighting would cause the desert to react so badly.

Midna: So? I've been good and I answered your questions. Can we be friends?

Urbosa: Does a sand seal go charging towards a Molduga?

Midna: Uh, no?

Urbosa: It depends on how brave and trained the seal is

Midna: So you're saying you can handle me? Haha, surrrre no one can handle this

Urbosa: can you just stop sending me pics of you?

Midna: Only to prove my point

Urbosa: That you have a great body?

Midna: Sure whatever

A/n
I have wayyy too much fun writing these two🤗😂