#BWB33

Kinabukasan ay sinundo ko si Aurora galing sa bahay ng pamilya ko.

"Did you sleep well last night princess?" I asked her

She nodded. "Yes. Lola took care of me and kuya." Kumakain siya ngayon ng lollipop na binili raw ng kapatid ko sa kanya

I smiled and caressed her hair.

Pagkabalik namin sa apartment ko ay pinaliuan ko siya at ngayon ay nanonood siya sa living room ng paborito niyang disney movie. Tumabi naman ako sa kanya. "Are you done with your homework baby?"

Her eyes are fixed on the tv. Hindi niya ako pinansin dahi masyado siyang focus sa pinapanood niya.

"Aurora," I called her

She looked at me. "Yes mommy?"

"I asked you if you're done with your homework," I pointed at her notebooks on the table in front of us. Nakakalat ang mga lapis at crayons niya roon

She pouted and shook her head in a cute way. "Not yet po."

I sighed. "Finish your homework first before you watch TV."

Tumingin siya sa TV. "But I want to watch first."

"You can watch it later after your homework."

Her expression turned sad. "Can I do my homework later?"

Kinuha ko ang assignment niya sa lamesa at lumapit sa kanya. "Mommy is here to help you with your homework. After that, we can watch together. Hmm?"

"Okay.."

I chuckled and kissed the top of her head. "Come. I'll help you."

Umupo kami sa sahig. Kumandong siya sa'kin kaharap ang notebook niya. She took her pencil and started writing her name. I was amazed when her handwriting is pretty. Tinulungan ko rin siyang kulayan ang mga iba't ibang shapes.

"What shape is this baby?" I asked

"That's a heart. I'll color it pink because pink is my favorite color," she happily said

"I thought a heart is supposed to be red?"

She pouted. "No. I want pink."

I smiled. "Okay but can I color the other heart red?"

Tumango siya habang nagkukulay. "Is red your favorite color?"

"Yes baby," I said and colored the heart red

Though my heart is black and broken, I still find comfort in red.

We then heard a knock at the door. Tumayo ako at naglakad papunta sa pinto. When I opened it, my eyes widened when I saw Ross.

"Ross!" gulat kong sabi

He smiled when he saw me. Nakita kong may dala rin siyang pagkain. "Hi."

I gulped. I suddenly remembered what happened last night. When I woke up, he wasn't there beside me anymore but he left a note saying he still needs to go to work.

"Kumain ka na? I brought food," he said and showed me the plastic he's holding

I chuckled. "Come in."

I opened the door wider and he went inside.

"Who's that mommy?"

Napatingin kami kay Aurora. Nakita ko siyang tumayo at lumapit sa'min. Pabalik baik ang tingin niya sa'min.

"Is that my daddy, mommy?"

Nagulat ako sa tanong niya. Ross is the first man who came here eversince she was born so I'm assuming she thinks he's her father. Biglang kumirot ang puso ko sa tanong niya.

Tumingin ako kay Ross. Yumuko siya bigla. I looked at my daughter again who's looking at the man beside me.

Mapait akong ngumiti at nilapitan siya. I knelt down and held her hands. "No baby," biglang nangilid ang luha sa mata ko. "I'd like you to meet Tito Ross," lumingon ako kay Ross na nakatayo sa likod namin

"Tito Ross?" she asked, clueless

Naramdaman kong lumapit sa'min si Ross at lumuhod din sa harapan ni Aurora. "Hi princess. Do you remember me?" he smiled at her

Nakatitig lang si Aurora sa kanya. I chuckled bitterly. "Mukha bang maalala ka niya?" bulong ko kay Ross

"Malay mo," sagot niya

We looked at Aurora again. Unti-unti siyang ngumiti. "I think I remember you. You were the prince that helped me at the mall."

Ross smiled widely. "That's right princess."

I smiled, a bit emotional.

"I told you she'd remember," he said to me

I rolled my eyes at him. I wiped the tear that fell from my eye.

It's a bittersweet feeling how she met Ross first than his own father. I really want her to meet him soon but I just feel so coward. Hindi ko alam kung paano sasabihin sa kanya. I'm scared to contact Jared.

"Are you friends with mommy?" I heard her asked

Tumingin ako sa kanila. Ross is looking at her with a genuine smile on his face. The way he looks at her, it's like she's his own daughter.

"Yes princess. It's nice to finally meet you Aurora."

Nanlaki ang mata ng anak ko noong binanggit ni Ross ang pangalan niya.

"It's nice to meet you rin po Tito Ross." I was surprised when she hugged him. Nagulat din si Ross pero niyakap nalang din niya si Aurora pabalik

I got emotional again. Tumayo ako at tinalikuran sila dahil may pumatak na luha sa mata ko. Pinunasan ko iyon agad. I looked at them again and they were still talking.

"Are you hungry princess? I brought you food," he said

Her eyes sparkled in joy. "Yes! But mommy told me to finish my homework first."

"Homework? Do you want me to help you?"

Her lips parted. "You would?"

Ross nodded. "I'd love to."

Tumingin sa'kin si Aurora. "Mommy. Tito Ross said he wanted to help me with my homework."

I smiled. "Sure baby."

Tumingin ulit siya kay Ross. She held his hand and pulled him to the living room. Ross chuckled and glanced at me. I then watch them on the living room. Umupo silang dalawa sa sahig at tinulungan na siya ni Ross tapusin ang assignment niya. They looked so happy.

Pumunta ako sa kusina at nilabas ang pagkain na binili ni Ross. He bought us donuts and ice cream. I opened the box and took one donut. Biglang nag-ring ang phone ko sa bulsa. I took out my phone and it was an unknown number who's calling me. Kumunot ang noo ko at sinagot ang tawag.

"Hello?"

"Hello Victoria?"

Tumaas ang balahibo ko pagkarinig ko ng boses niya. Hindi ako sumagot.

"Hey Tori? Are you there? Can we talk?"

I swallowed hard. "How did you get my number?"

"Please Tori. Can we meet? I want to talk to you," malungkot niyang sabi sa kabilang linya

I clenched my fist in anger. "Why? So you'd hurt me again? I had enough of you Jared."

Narinig ko siyang umiiyak kaya maslalong kumunot ang noo ko.

"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. I want to apologize to you in person so can we please meet? Tayong dalawa lang. Please Tori."

Yumuko ako at huminga ng malalim.

"Are you still there?"

I swallowed hard. "I don't know Jared. I'm not...ready to meet you."

Biglang bumalik sa'kin yung araw na pumunta siya sa bahay ko para saktan ako. I would never forget how he hurt me. That memory is a curse I badly want to forget.

"Gusto kong makita ang anak ko."

His words rang inside my ears. Hindi ko alam ang isasagot.

"Anak mo? Hindi ba't ikaw na ang nagsabi na hindi mo siya anak?"

It was hard for me to say those words to him knowing that he's the real father but it still hurts me whenever I remember he refused to accept Aurora as his daughter. Patas lang kami.

He sighed heavily. "I still have the right to meet her Tori. Please, let's talk. Pupuntahan kita-"

"No! Don't you ever come here," hindi ko sinasadyang napalakas ang boses ko. I was just shocked when he said that

"Why can't I? I want to meet her. It's been years Tori. Ilang taon ko siyang hindi nakasama. H'wag mo namang ipagkait sa'kin-"

"Well you wasted all those years Jared. You never cared about us," I firmly said

"No! I...I care about you. I'm sorry. Please, let me explain everything. Magkita tayo para makapag-usap tayo ng maayos."

Pumikit ako ng mariin. "You really are something huh? I can't believe you."

I heard him cry more. "I'm sorry baby. Please let's talk. Kailangan nating pag-usapan ito."

Tumingin ako sa kanan at nakita si Ross na nakatayo malapit sa'kin. Umiwas ako ng tingin. Naramdaman kong lumapit siya sa'kin.

"Who are you talking to?" he asked

Umiling ako at lumayo sa kanya. "It's nothing."

"Who's that Tori?" rinig kong sabi ni Jared

I shut my eyes, irritated.

"Goodbye Jared."

"No, wait. Please-" I ended the call before he could say anything else

Pinatong ko ang phone sa kitchen counter at napahilamos sa mukha. "Fuck. I don't fucking know what to do," I sighed

Naramdaman kong hinawakan ni Ross ang kamay ko. "Hey. What's wrong?"

Tumingin ako sa kanya. "Kanina ka pa ba nakikinig?"

Umawang ang labi niya. "No. I just got here. Nakita kong galit ka sa kausap mo. Jared called you?"

I looked away and nodded. "Yeah. He wants us to meet. He wants to meet our daughter. Hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko."

Niyakap niya ako. "I don't want him to hurt you again Tori. Sasamahan nalang kita kung gusto mong makipagkita sa kanya."

"But I don't know if I can. I want to but I'm scared," I swallowed hard. "But for the sake of my daughter, I will. Hindi ko pwedeng ilihim sa kanya ang ama niya habang buhay. She still has the right to know."

I felt him kissed the top of my head. "I know. I'll be here for you. Things are complicated but we'll work this out. Okay? Hindi ka nag-iisa Tori. Kasama mo ko."

I closed my eyes and hugged him back. "Thank you Ross."

The next day, we're on our way to meet Jared. He texted me the address where he'll meet me. Sa isang cafe kami magkikita at kanina pa ako kinakabahan. Kagabi ay halos hindi ako makatulog kakaisip sa mangyayari ngayon. Pinag-isipan ko ng mabuti ang desisyon ko na ito. There's no backing out now.

I looked at Ross who's driving beside me. Tumingin din siya sa'kin. Hinawakan niya ang kamay ko. "Don't worry Tori. I'm here."

I bit my lips and looked in front. Now that Ross is here with me, I feel more at ease. Kahit papaano ay nabawasan ang kaba na nararamdaman ko.

"Ross," I called him

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

Sumulyap siya sa'kin. Hindi ako tumingin sa kanya. "I just want to thank you that you're still here with me."

He squeezed my hand. "Always Tori. Always."

"Wala ka bang trabaho at sinamahan mo ko ngayon?"

"I have, but you're also important to me Tori. I promised that I'll always be here for you."

Tumingin ako sa kamay niya na nakapatong sa'kin.

How I wish I can hold your hand like the way you hold me Ross.

Ilang sandali ay tumigil kami sa tapat ng isang cafe. Tumingin ako sa loob at nakitang medyo marami ang customers doon. I removed my seatbelt and turned my head to face him. Nakita kong inayos niya ang sarili niya.

"Let's go," he said

Kumunot ang noo ko. "What? No. I'll go inside. You wait for me here in the car."

His brows furrowed. "What? No. I'll come with you. Hindi kita hahayaan mag-isa na kausapin yung gagong 'yon."

Lalabas na sana siya pero hinawakan ko ang braso niya. His arm muscles are hard. I'm surprised.

"No. Hindi pwede."

"Why can't I?"

I sighed. "Baka nakakalimutan mong artista ka Ross at ang daming tao roon sa loob. Pagkakaguluhan ka."

Napakurap-kurap siya. "I don't care. I'll still come with you."

"Ross naman. H'wag ka ng makulit."

"Para saan pa na sinamahan kita?"

"Your fans might see us. Ayokong magka-issue ka pa. And besides, I want to talk to Jared alone. I'm expecting you to wait here in the car."

Umiwas siya ng tingin. "Fine. I'll wear a disguise then."

I was surprised when he opened his drawer and took his black shades then wore it. "Oh? Sa tingin mo makikilala pa nila ako?" inayos niya ang buhok niya at tumingin sa'kin

I don't want to laugh at him but he's making me do so because he looked so serious with what he said.

"Ang talino mo grabe. Don't you know you'll just attract more people? I mean, look at you. You look like a celebrity with that outfit."

He's wearing a Burberry sweater and black pants. He has a silver necklace and chain earings. Mukha siyang mayaman na anak ng isang businessman. Well, makes sense since his dad owns a company.

"What? I'm not. These are just casual clothes, not unless you're attracted to me?" he smiled at me

I pressed my lips but I still couldn't help but to smile. "Casual na 'yan?"

"Yeah. Kung hindi sapat yung shades ko e 'di magsusuot nalang din ako ng cap," nagulat ako noong may nilabas din siyang cap sa drawer at sinuot din iyon. "Sigurado na ko na hindi nila ako makikilala. Hindi pa naman ako sikat e."

"Ugh! But still, you're just...too-"

"Handsome?"

"Overstyle."

He chuckled. "What does that even mean?"

"Basta masyadong nakakaattract yung porma mo."

He looked away. He then smiled playfully and bit his lips sexily.

He's so fucking hot. I can't deny.

Biglang tumunog ang phone ko. Nakita ko ang isang mensahe galing kay Jared.

"I'll get going. You stay here. Understand? H'wag kang lalabas," sabi ko sa kanya

He looked at me and sighed. "But-"

"I'll be back soon," I leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek so he'll shut up already. Hindi ko na tinignan ang reaksiyon niya at agad na lumabas ng kotse.

I looked at the cafe in front of me. I then fixed my bag on my shoulder before I went inside. Iginaya ko ang paningin sa paligid. I saw Jared sitting on the table at the corner of the cafe. Nakatingin siya sa labas ng bintana. It was not long until our eyes met. I swallowed hard. I took a deep breath and began to walk towards him. Tumayo siya bigla noong nakalapit ako.

"Hey Tori. It's good to see you again. Thank you for coming-" he was about to give me a hug but I immediately sat down on the chair in front of me.

"Wala kong planong makipag-usap sa'yo ng matagal kaya sabihin mo na ang dapat mong sabihin. I'm not gonna waste all my time on you, so better get straight to the point."

I heard him sigh. Nakita ko nalang siya na umupo sa harapan ko. He's wearing a gray shirt and a cap. I noticed that he's semi bald now. His gold chain hang loosely on his neck. I forced myself to look at him in the eye. Humigpit ang hawak ko sa bag ko.

"Here's your order." May dumating na waiter at nilapag niya sa lamesa namin ang dalawang frappe

"Thanks," Jared said. He pushed the frappe near me. Tumingin ako roon.

"I ordered your favorite," he smiled weakly

"I'm allergic to nuts," I said when I saw there are crushed nuts sprinkled on top of the whip cream

His lips parted. "Oh. I'm sorry...I-I forgot," binawi niya ulit ang frappe sa'kin. "I'll just replace it-"

"No need. I didn't come here to have a drink with you anyway. Baka lagyan mo ulit ng drugs."

He stiffened. Napakurap-kurap siya sa sinabi ko. I remained a blank expression on my face.

He placed his arms on the table and lowered his head. "Look. I'm really sorry Tori. I'm sorry for everything that I did to you in the past. I admit. I was wrong. Hindi ko naman sinasadyan na saktan ka."

"Wow. Ngayon mo lang narealize after what? Four? Five years? Are you expecting me to forgive you that easily? You don't know how much you hurt me Jared. You fucking traumatized me," matigas kong sabi

"I know. I regret everything. I'm such a jerk. I'm an asshole. Call me whatever you want. I understand if you're still angry at me-"

"Jerk? That's too shallow for you to call yourself a jerk. You're worse than that. You manipulative-toxic bastard! You ruined my life!" I exclaimed, almost out of breath

I don't care if some people are throwing glances at us. My blood is boiling by the way he talks. Hindi ko na napigilan ang galit ko sa kanya.

"That's why I'm here to apologize," he hoarsely said. He tried to reach for my hand on the table but I quickly removed it.

"Simula noong nawala ka sa'kin ay maslalong gumulo ang buhay ko. I only realized now how important you are in my life. I can't...I can't live without you Tori. I love you. Hindi ko kayang magmahal ng ibang babae maliban sa'yo," he said desperately

"Don't be such a fucking sad boy Jared. Grow the fuck up. Wala ka pa rin talagang pinagbago 'no? You've already said those words to me before and look where it took me? Hindi mo na ako maloloko Jared. You're sick."

I cringed when he told me the those three words. It disgusted me to the core.

"It's true! Please, can you give me another chance? I promise I'll be good. Nagbago na ako Tori. Hindi na ako yung gagong Jared na nakilala mo noon. Please give me another chance and I'll show you how much I've changed. I believe we're meant to be together. Kaya nga tayo may anak 'di ba? We can be a family again."

Maslalo akong nainis noong dinamay pa niya ang anak namin.

"Don't you dare bring my daughter up here! You neglected her, remember? Hindi ko nilihim o tinago sa'yo na may anak tayo, pero anong ginawa mo? iniwan mo kami sa ere. You didn't even have the balls that's why you ran away with your responsibility. You think you'll be a good father to her?" ganti ko

Yumuko siya at hinilot ang sentido. "Alam ko nagkamali ako Tori. Natakot ako. Ang bata pa natin no'n. Hindi pa ako handa maging ama. My parents would kill me if they found out!" he looked at me, tears began to form in his eyes

I snarled. " You fucking liar! Tang ina ang sabihin mo isa kang malaking gago. Kung makapagsalita ka ay akala mo may plano at pangarap ka sa buhay e wala ka namang ginawa kundi mambabae."

Nagtiim bagang siya. "Bakit kung makapagsalita ka ay parang wala kang kasalanan? Bakit? Ako lang ba nagkamali? Ikaw nga itong hindi marunong magseryoso sa relasyon," ganti niya

"Gago ka talaga 'no? H'wag mo kong siraan gamit ang past ko. Nagbago na ako. At least ako, pinanindigan ko ang anak ko. Hindi ko siya tinakwil kagaya mo," pinigilan ko ang luha na tumulo sa mata ko kahit na ang sakit na ng sinasabi niya sa'kin

"Kaya nga nagbago na rin ako Tori. Let's just forget everything that happened in the past and move on. Patawarin mo na ako. Baka kaya hindi tayo nagwork noon kasi hindi tayo naging seryoso sa isa't isa. We're just kids back then. We're adults now. Let's work on our relationship again. Bigyan natin ng second chance ang isa't isa. Para sa anak natin Tori," his voice turned soft again like he didn't just insult me a few seconds ago

"You don't deserve a second chance Jared. It was so hard for me to get out of our toxic relationship and I don't want to go through that pain ever again," I said bitterly. "Seriously, do you really think I'll let you be part of my life again after you hurt me? You abused me physically, mentally, and emotionally. Pinagmukha mo kong tanga. Pinaglaruan mo lang ako. Sinira mo ang buong pagkatao ko. You left me broken. You gave me nothing but pain and trauma. And I won't let you do the same to my daughter."

The trauma from the past gushed over me and my body tensed in fear. I felt a tear escaped my eye. "I raised her on my own without you at maslalo ko siyang kayang palakihin ng wala ka o kahit sino. Nahirapan ako noong pinagbubuntis ko siya Jared. Tiniis ko lahat ng sakit. Marami akong sinakripisyo sa kanya. Ikaw? Wala kang ginawa para sa kanya. You just fucked me and ran away to fuck other bitches. Now you came back and want me to accept you in my life again like nothing happened? Ano ka? Sineswerte?"

Bumuhos ang luha sa mata niya. "I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Maawa ka naman sa'kin Tori," he begged

I scoffed. "You want me to pity you? Bakit? Naawa ka ba sa'kin noon? Naawa ka ba noong nagmaakaawa ako sa'yo na h'wag akong saktan? Naawa ka ba sa anak mo noong iniwan mo siya?"

"Alam kong hindi mo ko kayang patawarin ngayon pero pwede ko bang kahit makita ang anak ko? I want to meet her. Hayaan mo sana akong makilala siya. I'm still his father. I have the right to know her."

"And what? You're gonna manipulate her too? Sasaktan mo rin siya? You'll use her to fulfill your dream that we can be a happy family like what you want? Fuck no."

His lips parted. Bahagyang kumunot ang noo niya. "What the fuck are you talking about? Gano'n ba kasama ang tingin mo sa'kin? I will never do that to her. She's my daughter. Hindi siya sa'yo lang-"

"She's not your possession for fuck's sake. We're not even married so you have no custody over her," I cut him off

He clenched his fist. His eyes now red from uncontrollable anger. "Puro sarili mo lang ba iniisip mo? Hindi ka ba naawa sa anak mo? I'm sure she's looking for her father too. Anong sinasabi mo sa kanya ha? Hindi na ako magugulat kung sinisiraan mo na agad ako sa kanya kahit hindi pa kami nagkikita-"

"You're fucking crazy Jared! Seriously, naririnig mo ba ang sarili mo? H'wag na hwag mo kong itulad sa'yo. Don't fucking try to change the story. Ako nanaman ang pagmumukhain mong masama. I'm trying to protect her from you. You're the one who failed as a parent, not me."

He sighed in frustration. Halata ang pagod sa mukha niya. "Why just can't you give me another chance? I'll prove to you that I changed. Hayaan mo kong bumawi sa kanya. I promise I'll be a good father to her. Please Tori."

Umiling ako. "I already gave you a chance but you broke it. Enough is enough."

He lowered his gaze and think deeply. "Pakiramdam ko maayos lang itong buhay ko kapag kasama na ulit kita. Ikaw lang ang babaeng mahal ko-"

"I'm not a fucking rehabilitation center Jared! It's not my responsibility to fix you. Go fix yourself! Gusto mo pang makita ang anak natin sa lagay mong 'yan? Hindi ako tanga. I know my worth and I will never settle for someone like you. H'wag kang umasang babalikan kita. H'wag kang umasa na magiging tayo ulit hindi purket may anak tayo. Don't you ever use her to get us back together."

He began to cry again. I looked away and shook my head in dismay. "I'm done talking to you," I said and stood up

Hindi ko pinansin ang ilang tinginan sa'kin ng mga tao at dire-diretsong naglakad papunta sa exit. Nagulat ako dahil may humawak sa kamay ko at hinila ako paharap sa kanya. I saw Jared in front of me.

"Wait. Tori. Hindi pa tayo tapos mag-usap. Hindi pa natin naayos ang lahat. Hayaan mo muna kong magpaliwanag," he trailed off

"I said I'm done hearing your explanation. We don't fucking need to get back together. We just need closure. Now, fuck off," I hissed and shook my hand from his grip

Nagulat ako dahil bigla niya ulit akong hinabol at hinila ang braso ko. He has that sadboy face again that I hate so much. "Tori please. Hindi ko hahayaan na ganito nalang tayo. Patawarin mo na ko-"

"Go to fucking therapy!" I yelled at him

Nanlaki ang mata ko noong bigla siyang lumuhod sa harapan ko habang umiiyak. Tumingin ako sa paligid at nakita kong pinagtitinginan na kami ng tao. Some of them are taking a video of us.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?! Tumayo ka nga diyan," giit ko. I tried to remove my hand from his but his grip tightened

"No. Not unless you'll forgive me," he begged

Tumingin ulit ako sa mga tao at mukha silang naawa kay Jared habang masama ang tingin nila sa'kin. Narinig ko silang nagbubulungan.

"Seriously Jared? Stop making a scene! I can't believe you. Are you doing this to earn sympathy from other people? Kaya ba dito tayo nag-usap? My God Jared! You really are a piece of shit."

"I love you Tori. Patawarin mo na ko," he caressed my hand

I wanted to scream right now because he's making me crazy! Gusto ko siyang sampalin sa kadramahan niya. Pa-emote emote pa siya sa harapan ko para siya ang magmukhang biktima.

"Utang na loob naman Jared. Pwede bang tigilan mo na ko? Tapos na tayo. Alin ba ang hindi mo maintindihan doon?" inis kong sabi

He slowly got back up on his knees while still holding my hand. Hinila niya ako palapit sa kanya pero biglang may lalaking pumagitna sa'min. Inalis niya ang kamay ni Jared na nakahawak sa'kin.

"Let go of her," he said in a cold voice

I then realized that it was Ross who's standing in front of me. Nakatalikod siya sa'kin habang kaharap naman niya si Jared. Maslalong lumakas ang bulungan ng mga tao. Alam kong nakilala nila si Ross.

I heard Jared scoffed. "And who do you think you are?" he asked while staring at Ross intensely

Nakita ko kung paano kumuyom ang kamao ni Ross. Bago pa sila mag-away ay tinulak ko na siya palayo kay Jared. "Let's go."

Hila-hila ko ang braso niya hanggang sa makalabas kaming dalawa sa cafe. Hinanap ko ang kotse niya at nakita ko iyong nakaparada sa parking lot. Mabilis kaming naglakad papunta roon.

"I told you to wait in the car," malamig kong sabi

"I did but I couldn't just sit there and watch you. Nakita kong ayaw ka pa rin niya tigilan kaya hindi ko na rin napigilan."

Tumigil ako at humarap sa kanya. "May mga nakakita sa'yo roon sa loob. Nakilala ka nila. Ano nalang ang sasabihin nila sa'yo-"

"I don't care. That guy was already humiliating you in front of everyone and I don't-" hindi niya na natuloy ang sasabihin niya dahil bigla kaming nakarinig ng sigaw mula sa likod

"Tori!"

I looked behind us and my eyes widened when I saw Jared approaching us. I can't believe he followed us outside. Napahinto siya nang makilala si Ross. Wala ng suot si Ross na cap at shades. Pabalik balik ang tingin niya sa'min.

He scoffed. "Wow Tori. So eto pala ang pinalit mo sa'kin. E gago rin 'tong isang 'to e!" turo niya kay Ross

Matalim na tumingin si Ross sa kanya. Susugurin na niya sana si Jared pero pinigilan ko siya. Hinawakan ko ang braso niya at nilagay siya sa likod ko.

"Hindi ko siya pinalit sa'yo!" I shouted at him

Nanatili ang mata niya kay Ross. "Seriously Tori? E ano lang? Bago mong fuckbuddy? Sinasabi ko na nga ba e. Umpisa palang alam kong may relasyon na kayong dalawa. Kaya ba ayaw mo kong bumalik sa buhay mo kasi may bago ka na?"

I inhaled sharply while glaring at him. "Fuck you Jared. We're not even in a serious relationship in the first place so don't act as if I cheated on you!"

"Patas lang tayo kung gano'n. May iba akong babae at may iba ka ring lalaki noon. Isn't it unfair for you Tori? Pagdating sa kanya pinatawad mo na agad siya samantalang ako, hirap na hirap ka. Bakit ha? Kasi mahal mo siya? Bakit ang dali para sa'yo na patawarin siya pagkatapos ng lahat ng ginawa niya sa'yo?! You're being so fucking biased-"

Sinugod ko siya at malakas na sinampal sa mukha. Umatras ako pagkatapos, hingal na hingal. Naramdaman kong nilayo ako ni Ross sa kanya. "Putang ina mo! Don't you ever fucking compare yourself to him. H'wag mong baliktarin ang sitwasyon. Mas malala ang ginawa mo sa'kin hayop ka."

He glared at me with his hands in a closed fist. "Parehas lang kami na sinaktan ka Tori pero hindi ko alam kung paano mo siya nagawang patawarin ng basta basta. Bakit ha? Purket artista na siya? Purket sikat na siya 'di tulad noon? E noon nga wala kang pake sa kanya e. You said you'll never date someone like him. You said you don't like him. You think he's better than me? So bakit ka sa kanya bumagsak?"

I clenched my jaw in anger.

Unti-unti siyang naglakad palapit sa'kin. "Sabihin mo sa'kin, bakit? Para gamitin siya? Para kumapit sa kanya? So mas pinili mo siya kaysa sa'kin kasi sa tingin mo mas mabibigyan ka niya ng magandang future? Sikat na siya ngayon kaya sa kanya ka kumakapit para makaangat ka ulit dahil sa nasira mong career, hindi ba? Hirap na hirap ka na sa buhay kaya pineperahan mo lang siya. You're only taking advantage of him Tori."

My eyes widened when Ross stepped in and punched him in the face. Tumilapon si Jared sa sahig. Unti-unti siyang bumangon at pinunasan ang dugo sa labi. Ngumisi siya sa'ming dalawa. I looked at Ross who's eyes are bloodshot while looking at Jared. He was breathing heavily. His jaw clenched in anger. Gano'n din ang kamao niya.

"May anak na tayo Tori kaya tayo dapat ang para sa isa't isa, hindi siya. Why can't you understand that?" he begged. "Kahit na magsama pa kayo ay hindi rin kayo magiging masaya. I'm still the father of her child," he spat out some blood

Sumugod ulit ako sa kanya para sampalin siya pero hinawakan ako ni Ross sa magkabilang braso. My eyes remained on Jared. "Hayop ka! Hinding hindi mo makikita ang anak ko. Ilalayo ko siya sa'yo. Wala kang kwenta!"

He smirked and moved closer to my face. "I'll forever be the pest in your life Tori. Sa'kin ka pa rin babagsak. I'll make sure to make you mine in the end. Ayaw mo ba no'n? Makokompleto na tayong pamilya?" he tried to touch my face but I immediately moved away from him. He only laughed evily

I gritted my teeth in anger. "You're crazy! You're fucking crazy!" hingal kong sabi

"Enough Tori. Umalis na tayo," sabi ni Jared sa tainga ko. Hinawakan niya ang kamay ko at hinila palayo kay Jared ngunit hindi ko inalis ang paningin sa kanya. Nanatili siya sa sahig habang nakangisi sa'min.

"Don't listen to him," he added. Narinig kong bumukas ang pinto ng kotse. I was about to get inside but then we heard him spoke again. Napalingon ulit kami sa kanya

"H'wag kang masyadong kampante sa kanya tol! H'wag kang umasang mamahalin ka niya pabalik. Hinding hindi yun mangyayari. Ginagamit ka lang niyan! Diyan siya magaling e. Hihilahin ka lang niya pababa. Hindi mo siya kayang baguhin. You can never replace me! Hindi purket bumalik ka ay may pag-asa ka na! Tandaan mo. May anak na kami! H'wag mo ng pilitin ang sarili mo sa kanya dahil hindi ka niya mahal! Sinasayang mo lang ang oras mo. Kung ako sa'yo, mag-focus ka nalang sa career mo!"

I knew for a fact that he's pertaining to Ross. Masama akong tumingin kay Jared dahil sa sinabi niya. I raised my middle finger at him before I got inside the car. Nanatili si Ross ng ilang segundo sa labas bago pumasok na rin sa loob.

Habang nasa byahe ay tahimik lang kaming dalawa. I looked at him and his eyes are fixed on the road. He's holding the wheel using one hand while his elbow rest on the window. Napansin ko na malalim ang kanyang iniisip. Tumingin ako sa labas ng bintana at nakitang papalubong na ang araw.

"I fucking hate him. Sabi niya mag-uusap lang kami pero gumawa pa siya ng skandalo. I want to talk to him as civil as possible pero mabilis na nag-init ang ulo ko sa kanya. Looking at his face makes me sick. I badly want to throw up."

"Akala niya madadala niya ako sa pag-emote niya. Sadboy talaga puta. Mas lumala pa nga. Mas binigyan lang niya ako ng rason para hindi ko ipakilala ang anak ko sa kanya. I mean, I know he has the right. Aurora is longing for his father for so many years. I just don't understand why he has to throw tantrums. Ang bilis magbago ng mood niya. He has anger management issues. As a mother, I want to protect her from his own father. Isn't it ironic?" I ranted

"I'd protect my daughter too from that kind of man. If ever my daughter has a suitor like him, sisiguraduhin ko na hindi na niya makikita ang sikat ng araw."

I chuckled at his remark. "We weren't even in a relationship in the first place and he thinks I cheated on him, e siya nga yung cheater. He has done worse! That dickhead."

I looked at the window. "I know I've done something wrong too but that doesn't mean I'm a bad parent. Am I?"

"You're not a bad mother Tori. You're the best mother for Aurora. Don't let him tell you otherwise. He's just guilty because he left you and your child. Hindi siya tunay na lalaki."

"I'm trying to get better everyday yet he still have the audacity to bring up my past and ruin me again. Ginagamit niya pa talaga si Aurora para magkabalikan kami. Para siyang sinasapian. He needs Jesus," I sighed. "I've learned my lesson. Hinding hindi na ako magpapaapekto sa sinasabi niya."

Tipid lang na ngumiti si Ross bago naging seryoso ulit ang mukha. The ambiance became awkward so I tried to change the mood.

"By the way, I just want to ask kung sino yung bata na hinatid mo sa school noong nagkita tayo?" I asked, trying to divert the topic.

"Anak yun ni Ate."

My lips parted. Umiwas ako ng tingin at yumuko. "Oh...okay."

"Why?" I saw a ghost of smile on his lips

"Nothing. I was just shocked."

"Akala mo anak ko 'no?"

Napatingin ako sa kanya. He glanced at me before he looked at the road again. "Wala nga akong girlfriend, anak pa kaya?" he smiled a bit

"Malay ko ba."

"I want to focus on my career first. I still have goals in life that I want to accomplish."

I smiled weakly. "I'm sure you'll be successful someday. You'll be a great actor."

"Sana nga," he bit his lips playfully

Tumikhim ako. "Kaya ba iba treatment nila sa'yo kasi...dahil dun sa past mo?"

Hindi siya umimik.

"I mean, I noticed when you had a photoshoot for your movie promotion. You were treated unfairly just because you're still new at dahil nga din doon sa past records mo. Hindi dapat gano'n e. I don't know, maybe that's just what the industry is. It's cruel and unfair for some people."

"Gano'n talaga kapag nagsisimula palang. Hindi naman lahat pinapalad e. I'll just work harder then and prove to them that I also deserve to be in the industry. I don't want luck. It's hard but I prefer to experience and go through that hardships rather than getting everything so easily. I don't want to depend on my father too. Yes I am privileged but I don't get any special treatment and that's fine with me. I don't want it anyway. I'd rather start from the bottom and work my way up. I know I can learn a lot along the way. I just have to trust the process."

I can't help but to smile with his wise words. "Wow Ross. Look at you now. You've grown and gained confidence over the years. I'm proud of you," I complimented and pinched his cheeks

"Why do you always do that? I don't even have baby fat in my face. Do you see how sharp my jawline is?"

I laughed. "Ilang bubble gum ang kinain mo para maachieve 'yan?"

He scoffed. "I lost some weight Tori. That's why."

"I noticed that too. Hindi ka naman mataba noon ah. May abs ka na kaya noon pa. I guess now you consist of 90% muscles and 10% fat."

"You estimated that so quickly huh?" he chuckled

I pinched his cheeks again. Napailing nalang siya.

"Stop."

"Naiinis ka na?"

"No."

I smiled. "You're so cute. I don't understand why you look like a bad boy but your personality is the total opposite."

"Where did you get that from?"

"It's just my observation," I smirked

Naging tahimik na ulit ang byahe. The mood changed too. I looked at Ross and he's thinking deeply again.

"Hey. What's wrong? Are you okay?" I asked

Hindi siya nagsalita.

"Ross."

"It's nothing."

I sighed. "I know there's something on your mind. Tell me, what's bothering you? Is it because of what Jared told you earlier?"

Ayoko na niyang isipin pa ang nangyari kanina pero mukhang naapektuhan pa rin siya no'n.

He licked his bottom lip. "No.."

"Don't listen to him Ross. Don't let him affect you, affect us anymore, like what he did years ago. Hindi niya alam ang mga sinasabi niya."

"I'm not using you Ross. Kung iyon ang iniisip mo-"

He shook his head. "No. That's not it." His lips formed in a grim line

He suddenly stopped the car on the side of the road. I looked at him, worried.

"You just don't deserve to be in this kind of situation with him. Why can't he just-" he paused, mumbling some words. "Fuck."

I held his arm and caressed it. "Hey, it's okay."

"He wants to ruin your life again Tori, including your daughter," he faltered

I smiled weakly. "We'll get through this. Don't worry. Don't think about it too much. Alam kong marami ka ring inaasikaso. H'wag mo na akong problemahin."

He moved closer to me. He held my face and kissed my forehead. "I love you."

Hindi agad ako nakasagot sa sinabi niya. Umayos na ako ng upo at tumingin sa harap.

"Let's go home."