"I can't believe you, Jessa. You are just going to leave again." Cameron barked at me.

After what happened between us and my shaky grasp on reality, I was not even close to being prepared to have another Cameron Nash encounter right now. He slept with me and then kicked me out of his house in the middle of the night. I didn't owe him any type of explanation on my comings and goings. We were well beyond the point where we could maintain civility with each other. My lady bits were extremely bruised even after a few days had passed if anyone needed the evidence of how broken we were.

So why was he even here right now? I didn't understand what was going on inside his head. He made it clear what happened meant nothing to him. He said it was just sex and he never wanted to see me again. Did he just come back to throw it in my face? Did he want one last little poke at me to make sure I would crack? Whatever he was doing this for, it fucking annoyed me and I was ready to make sure he knew it. The gloves were off and I wanted to punch him below the belt. My new meds hadn't fully kicked in yet and I was a powder keg of unstable emotions.

"Cameron, I don't have time for this." I spat at him harshly.

"You are going to make time." He argued back.

I turned to face him head-on as he walked into the room. He slammed the door shut behind him and locked it. Apparently, whatever his plan was didn't include the other members of the household interfering in our argument. I looked at the lock like it was a death sentence; I felt trapped.

"I have a show I have to get to. It is a last-minute thing. I don't have a choice. I have to go now or I'll be late." I didn't know why I felt the need to explain what I was doing to him. I didn't owe him anything.

"You have always had a choice Jess, and you always choose the wrong one." He yelled at me.

Was he really going to just belittle me?

"If you want to keep criticizing me, then you can just go home, Cameron. I don't need you to stand here and remind me how terrible of a person I am. You already did a remarkable job of it the other night. Thanks for that. By the way, you really know how to make a girl feel good about herself." I placed my hands on my hips.

"You really are the most selfish person I have ever known in my life. Do you know that? It always only ever been about you and what you want."

"I'm selfish? Listen to you, Cameron. You are screaming at me because of the career I chose. You knew how much my music has always meant to me and you decided to stay behind instead of supporting me. I asked you to go and wanted you with me out there. I could have taken care of you and we could have been happy together. It didn't have to be like this. It never had to." My hands were flailing around uncontrollably. I had the urge to hit something or someone. The anger was boiling over and I was about to lose control.

"I would have never been happy living that life, Jess. It's not who I am." Cameron said in a flat tone.

"And I would have never been happy if I stayed." I shrieked at him.

Cameron huffed and shook his head. The corner of his mouth pulled up slightly like he was amused with what I just told him.

What about this was funny to him?

"So, that means you would have never been happy with me. I have always known I was never enough for you, Jessa. From the first day I met you, I knew you could never love me as much as I loved you. Thanks for finally saying it. I've spent the last two years holding out hope that you would finally come to your senses, but you obviously never will." He stabbed me in the heart with his words and twisted them like a blade.

"Cameron, I didn't say that either." I sighed, letting out the steam that was building inside me.

"I know you, darling. You don't have to say anything. It's written all over your face." He closed his eyes and shook his head at me. His jaw was clenched like he was fighting to hold something back. There was something else he wanted to say to me. I could see it hiding in his body language.

My phone alarm went off, disrupting the silence between us.

"Errrghh!" I screamed and stomped over to it angrily.

Somedays, I wished I could just be a normal person and not have to interrupt my life for medication breaks.

Cameron stood and silently stared at me as I walked over, opened my pillbox, and dumped them out into my hands. I swallowed them without water and then went to grab the birth control compact out of my bag. I popped the pill out of the packaging and placed it on my tongue. I swallowed it down too and then hid the compact back in the side pocket of my bag.

Cameron studied every move I made wordlessly. His gray eyes flashed like someone had waved a flashlight in front of them. He tried to shake it away before I noticed. He looked like he was calculating his next vicious attack against me.

Puddles sat up in the suitcase and began growling at Cam. He bared his teeth like he was ready to pounce. At least one man in my life was willing to stand up for me. Too bad it was the little rodent nesting in my unmentionables.

Cameron looked down at Puddles in confusion. He was trying to figure out what the hell the little gremlin was. He blinked his eyes repeatedly like he wasn't sure what he was looking at, which only pissed me off that much more.

"Is there something else you want to say to me? If not, you can go ahead and leave now." I grabbed my bag and slammed it down on the dresser when his stance began to change from irritation to arrogance. I had to do something since the violent rage was simmering under my skin. I took my frustrations out on the bag so I didn't hit him instead.

"Nope, enjoy your life, Jessa Miller, because I am about to go live mine for the first time and it feels fantastic knowing I don't have to put up with your crazy shit anymore." He huffed as he aimed lower and lower to knock me out.

Puddles began yapping loudly at him. His hackles were raised as he hunkered down, ready to pounce.

"My crazy? Do I need to remind you about what I saw at the bar? You look like you have been doing just fine without me. Why don't you go give that girl a call and go bother her instead?" The anger flared up in me again. I was shrieking over Puddles incessant barking to make sure I was heard loud and clear.

It wasn't like Cam wasn't out doing things. In fact, even if it was only one time, it was still more than I had. He may have been able to move on, but I never could. Not one person in the world could ever hold a candle to him. I would rather spend the rest of my life feeling empty and lost without him than to try to pretend with someone else.

"You know what, Jess? You are right, like always. I've never been happier in my life." Cameron's phone went off in his pocket and he pulled it out to see who it was. He smiled and shoved it back in with a look of superiority plastered on his face. He was so fucking haughty; it was sickening.

"What was that?" I asked, watching his face come alive.

"Oh, it's nothing." He cheesed again.

Puddles was going crazy. He was digging in the suitcase like he was preparing to bury Cam's body in there.

"It looks like something to me. Come on, go ahead. Don't hold back. I want to know since you are being so honest with me for the first time ever in our relationship. Why don't you tell me what has you so fucking giddy right now? Who is she? Is she better in bed than I am? Do you come inside her like you do when you fuck me?" I stood up in his face to challenge him.

"You really want to know?" He cockily smirked down at me.

"It's not like you can hurt me anymore than you already have." I raised my eyebrow, waiting for him to speak.

"It's Kelly. I left her over an hour ago, naked in my bed. I told her to keep touching herself for me, but she wasn't allowed to come until I got back to stick my dick inside her. She's begging for me to come back and fill her. She behaves so well for me, unlike you." One corner of his mouth pulled up wickedly.

The life and fight I had in me drained at that moment. Cameron won.

"Get the fuck out." My lip was quivering as the fight in me died. I shivered and held my arms around myself as I shrunk back down. I couldn't look up at him anymore. He was disgusting.

He hesitated and stepped towards me.

"Darling, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean any of that. Please don't make me leave. I'm just really upset and being stupid, and..." He said softly and attempted to pull me into him. I shoved him away from me and he fell back into the wall.

"Do not touch me, call me, think about me, or come near me ever again." My voice started elevating. My chest was constricting as the heat spread over my skin. I was powerless over my body and mind. I picked up anything I could grab and started throwing it at him. He dodged both of my shoes and they hit the wall behind him with a thud.

There was an authoritative knock on my door, which snapped me back to my senses. I was in the process of picking up my suitcase, with Puddle's still in it, to hurl it at his face. Puddles was growling at Cameron and snapping his teeth as he prepared to ride the suitcase like a flying saucer. I was ready to watch him latch onto his jugular with his teeth like a bad movie about piranhas.

Cameron and I both stood there frozen in place, staring each other down.

"One of you is going to open this door right now or else I will break it down." My dad's voice boomed from the other side. Cameron huffed and walked over to unlock it.

He swung the door open and motioned for my dad to step in. Dad was on his guard as he glanced around the room to check out the damage. A frown was set deep on his face as he surveyed the scene in front of him.

"Is everything ok in here?" Dad asked, even though he was well aware that it wasn't. He may be thick some of the time, but he wasn't a fool. He knew what was going on between Cam and me.

"Make him leave," I begged. My dad's light blue eyes were taking inventory of my appearance and assessing my mental state. He nodded at me when he had come to a decision in his head. Dad walked over to where Cameron was standing and patted his back.

"Come on, Cameron. I'll walk you back to your truck." Dad guided Cameron out of the room and shut the door behind them.

I fell to my knees on the floor and sobbed. Why did Cameron keep doing this to me?