I think Thanksgiving was the worst day of my life.

I remember sitting on my couch at around midnight, elbows on my knees and head in my hands, staring blankly at the carpet. I remember the sound of crying from down the hall, the smell of smoke from the open balcony doors, the feel of my freshly done hair pulling under my palms. That night would be imprinted in my mind for the rest of my life.

But the strangest part retrospectively was that the day started off pleasantly busy: rolling out of bed to help my mom start putting the turkey in the oven, helping Lex with her English homework, getting in a quick workout and a hot shower. All of this on top of getting the house ready to greet not just Ian and Jen, but also my other siblings.

Leah and Kiera weren't often home, since they both lived down in Florida. Kiki was living in Orlando, working through her sophomore year of university, and Leah was living with her newest boyfriend and worked as a hairdresser in a Miami salon. During the holidays, they'd taken to driving up to Atlanta to spend some time at home, which always sent my mother's heart leaping into her throat.

"Luke, honey, do you mind watching the kitchen while I clean the bathroom?" she called, already halfway down the hall with toilet cleaner and a fresh bottle of hand soap. She rattled around in there before heading to the guest bedroom, freshening it up for Ian and Jen. And then it was the living room, fluffing the pillows and dusting the picture frames.

The apartment was pretty tight when the five of us were growing up, with Leah and Kiki sharing a room together and Adrian and I packed into the one I now occupied alone. Alex always had her own room, but until Kiera had moved out, it was essentially a shoebox. Now, that shoebox was a guest room that barely fit a double bed and a tiny dresser and Alex took over the now free girls' room. When the whole family was together, Leah would roll in an extra mattress, which was usually met with some complaining on Lex's end.

"Ugh," she groaned, dragging herself out of her room. Alex always dolled up a little for holidays, today wearing a new pair of flared jeans and a metallic-y purple sweater. Her hair beads clicked together as she pulled her braids up into a ponytail. "Luke, can you help me with the bed? I can't carry it."

"Yeah. Get Dad to help in the kitchen," I said over a pan of vegetables.

"He's not here," Lex replied, and I jerked to look at her. At my disbelief, she sighed. "He said he was picking up a pumpkin pie."

"Kiki always brings one, though," I muttered, but at that moment the doorbell rang. "That should be Ian and Jen."

Alex's eyes widened and a grimace ripped across her cheeks. "You open it. I'll watch the kitchen."

With a sigh, I agreed, passing her my spatula and making my way to the front door. I opened it to find Adrian snd Jen smiling wide on the other side and carrying a big dish of Jen's famous sweet potatoes. They came in and greeted the rest of the house (not without some strained but resigned hugs from Alex) and, with the extra hands, helped in the kitchen while I got Leah's mattress in order.

In the end, though, it would prove not to be hers.

The next time the doorbell rang, Mom left to go answer it with Lex, Ian, and I following at her heels, itching to see our sisters. But when we opened the door, we were greeted with not two, but three faces.

In front, Kiki stood with a pie in her hands, smiling. Her hair was straightened and long, almost down to her waist, and her eyes were lined with thick wings. She wore a pretty, copper-red dress under a thick winter jacket, already used to the weather down in Florida. Next to her, Leah was also grinning, though a little nervously, and her hands were folded into the pockets of her jacket. She'd always had the most complimented hair between my siblings: long and more loosely curled, well managed and shiny. Today, it was pulled into a braided style draped over her shoulder...

Also over that same shoulder was a man I'd never seen before.

"Ma! Luke, Ian, Lexi!" Kiki laughed, leaning to wrap my mom in a hug, dragging a gasping Ian into the middle of it. Alex and I stared blankly between Leah and the man, stomachs sinking in unison.

"Guys..!" Leah chuckled. "How are you?"

As I was wrapped into a brief hug, Alex asked: "is that your new boyfriend?"

My mother's head jerked up from her coddling. "You didn't tell me you were bringing home a boyfriend!"

Kiki, pulling away: "you didn't tell Ma you had a boyfriend?!"

Ian's voice from the kitchen echoed "Leah has another boyfriend?"

Leah's smile wobbled. "Surprise?"

This wasn't the first time a boyfriend had come unannounced, but judging from the look on her face, my mom was absolutely not happy that Leah had decided to do this on Thanksgiving. My head was already trying to sort sleeping arrangements amidst the surprise.

Her latest boy toy was finally revealed when Leah stepped aside, beckoning him forward. His hair was cropped short and neat, his face was wide, and his skin was rich and dark. He was dressed nicely in a pair of slacks and a button down, both of which bulged and bunched with thick muscle every time he moved. Awkwardly, he stepped forward, holding out one beefy hand to my mom while the other held a foil-wrapped dish. "It's a pleasure, Mrs. Donovan. You've raised a wonderful daughter. I'm Trevor."

My mother eyed him warily, taking his hand. "The pleasure is mine, Trevor. Why don't you come on in, make yourself at home?"

A bit stuffily, the rest of us introduced ourselves to Trevor, asking him about his job and his life down in Miami. Knowing Leah, they wouldn't last a month, but we humored her batting her eyelashes and jabbering on and on about how Trevor was a physical therapist, how he played football on the side, how he had this fat cat named Mittens back home. Dinner was quickly finished and ready to be served, but we were still missing one more person. So, I sat down on the floor in front of the couch and let Leah's thin hands work away at my disheveled hair as she perched behind me.

"Where's Dad?" Leah asked, hands twisting and pulling at my twists.

I shrugged at the question, wincing at a tighter tug. "I'm not sure. Said he was picking something up."

Alex, who was in the next room setting the table, frowned but said nothing, finishing her portion of the help and leaving for her room.

Finally, just as the table had been placed, my dad walked through the front door. "I'm home!" he'd called, sending Leah and Kiki swarming him with attention and hugs and greetings that he returned with a gentle smile and a few laughs. My mother beckoned him to the table, where he set down a store-bought pumpkin pie that Kiki eyed warily but otherwise didn't comment on.

We all gathered around the table, shuffling into our seats. Well, all of us save for Alex, who'd promised to come in a minute or two and told us not to wait up. My mother cleared her throat.

"Let's go around the table and say what we're thankful for," she said. "I'll start. I'm very grateful for our wonderful family, for being together and happy."

The girls awwed, then Leah continued from Mom's right. "I'm grateful for a good life doing something I love, for you all of course, and for having met Trevor."

Trevor smiled at that. "I'm grateful to be here tonight with you all... thank you for letting me into your home tonight. And I'm grateful for Leah."

My mother seemed to relax a little at that. Everyone looked next at Kiki, who pursed her lips. "I'm grateful for being here with all of you, for my friends back in Florida, and for the opportunity to study something I love. And also for the campus dog, he's real cute."

Laughs around the table, and then it was my turn. Just as I opened my mouth to deliver some basic response, a door slammed open down the hall and heavy footsteps shook the apartment like thunder.

"How could you?" Alex's voice cried, broken like I've never heard from her. She rounded the corner and her eyes burned with hatred, throwing fire right at the head of the table. "How!"

Despite becoming the focus of her anger, my father remained calm, sipping his glass of wine.

"What's going on?" Leah demanded, calling Lex's attention. But it was only for a moment before those angry eyes just snapped right back to Dad.

"You fucking piece of shit," she said, her voice hoarse and emotional, her eyes glazing.

"Alex!" my Mom

"No. What happened?" I asked, looking between them. At my father's void expression, something in me shifted uncomfortably. "What did you do?"

"He cheated," Alex hissed.

The table fell deathly silent.

For a moment, nobody moved, nobody spoke. The hold the news had on me was suffocating, fatally so. I couldn't fathom it. I didn't believe it.

"Don't be ridiculous, Alexandra," my dad finally said, shaking his head. "I never—"

"Shut up, shut up!" my sister cried. "How could you!"

"Alex, don't be rash," Kiki tried, starting to stand. "You don't know that—"

"I found the lady's social media," Alex continued, pulling up her phone with shaking hands. "She posted pictures because I don't think she knows he's fucking married."

On the screen was a collection of photos of my dad and an unfamiliar woman at beaches, on dates, holding up a glittering promise ring. He was smiling so widely here, having so much fun. And then there was a picture of them kissing, smack on the lips under a glittering sunset, so happily and beautifully, and that's when it really began.

I felt like I was on fire.

A rage like I had never felt consumed me, inside and out. The pent-up emotions that had already been brewing in my compounded, multiplied tenfold. Suddenly, I could barely see through the red, barely hear through the ringing in my ears.

"You did what?" I snapped, banging my hands on the table in front of him. My dad jumped, finally showed something other than impassivity. Tears sprung to my eyes, but I blinked them away.

I felt Kiki try and touch my shoulder. "Luke—"

I yanked myself away. "Is this what you've been doing on your damned business trips? Leaving us behind to go fuck other women?"

My dad's face hardened. "That's no way to talk to your father."

"You are not my father," I hissed. "You don't know the first thing about me. You don't love or respect me, and you certainly don't love and respect this family."

He stood up, slammed his fist on the table. "You ungrateful—!"

My nails dug into my palms. "You're calling me ungrateful? You're calling me ungrateful when you're such a disgusting, unsatisfied pig that you've just been lying and leaving us behind to fuck around?"

My dad looked like he wanted to strangle me. He really did, with the way the veins bulged grossly in his neck and his fists curled in and out, in and out, in a rhythm like a beating heart. But he knew I was bigger than him, stronger than him with all those hours in the gym, on the ice. So instead of reaching for my throat, he threw his glass of wine against the floor, shattering it in a hurricane of glass. He stormed through the kitchen, grabbing his keys and opening the front door.

"You people wouldn't understand, but know that what you're saying is ignorant and wrong," he spat. "I'll be back for my things."

The door slammed behind him.

I was so angry. It was becoming a familiar feeling, the pressure between my lungs, the red-hot flames eating at my mind. I wanted to chase him and yell at him more. I wanted to scream and punch and I didn't know if I would have if I hadn't heard my mother sob to my right.

"Mama," I gasped, watching Kiki and Ian run to her side. It was like all the tension drained from me as all of my attention zeroed into my crying mother. My legs carried me to her and my arms went around her middle as I turned her to face me. She was a mess, so completely destroyed that I wasn't exactly sure what to do. I had never seen her like this before, and the thought occurred to me that maybe I shouldn't have been shouting and fighting with the man who just ripped open her heart.

"Luke—" she started to say, but I shook my head.

"Mama, it's okay," Kiki said, her own voice wobbly. "Let's breathe, okay? Can someone get her a glass of water?"

Dinner was long forgotten after this. Someone got a glass of water, someone helped me move Ma to her bed, someone helped her call a friend. Everyone was crying, wiping away fat tears on shirt sleeves, staining them with makeup. I couldn't sleep where I was supposed to, on the couch. Neither could anyone else, really. Trevor and Leah ended up crawling out of my bedroom, where they had been sleeping, and going home halfway through the night, preferring the long drive back down to Miami over the unimaginable tension in the house. Jen was in my mother's room with her, holding her while she cried. Kiki pulled out a box of cigarettes—a new habit I hadn't seen—and stepped onto the balcony to smoke. Ian followed and asked quietly for one, something he hadn't done in almost a year to my knowledge. Lex was somewhere. Probably her room. I should check on her, I thought. I never did. I couldn't get myself off the couch. My body ached, my head throbbed.

That night was the night my life felt over. Or like I'd live the rest of it in a bad dream.

[a/n] wham. bam. wdyt.

what a fast update!!! this is new for me haha. hope y'all enjoyed it! i'm curious: is anyone surprised luke's dad is a piece of shit?

love you guys! xx