Chapter 8: You're Sorry? Too Bad
I didn't skip school after my dramatic exit simply because I wasn't brave enough to do so, and I had a paper due for French: my final period that day.
So as soon as the final bell rang, I was the first person to flee the building, sprinting to the bike shed as fast as I could - which wasn't that fast considering the fact that I was always one of the last people picked for teams in gym class. Although, I do think Michelle has a hand in my lack of popularity in gym class.
My phone buzzed for the umpteenth time today, displaying yet another text from my friends. Blake had tried calling me all throughout French, pleading me to talk to him since I obviously wasn't okay. But I just rejected his calls, hoping he'd get the message that I need space to dwell in my frustration.
As I turned the corner, I came to an abrupt halt when I saw a familiar figure leaning against my bike, drumming their fingers on their toned thigh. Clad in stonewashed jeans, a snug grey sweatshirt and a burgundy beanie, I'd say this guy was asking me to sock his face by showing up next to my bicycle. How did he even know which one of the bikes were mine?
"What on earth are you doing here?" I barked, pushing my curls out of my face and stomping towards the bike shed.
My voice was shrill enough to cut through his headphones and catch his attention. I could have sworn that his cheeks held a tinge of pink, but when he looked up, all I could see was his usual stormy eyes, a mess of blond hair and a deep scowl.
For once, Tyler remained silent, as if he himself wasn't quite sure as to why he was here.
Taking a couple of steps forward, I crossed my arms over my chest and tried to calm the erratic beating in my chest. I wasn't so sure if it was because of my increasing anger or just the surprise of his presence. Either way, I was about to go on a rampage and whoop this guy's ass if he didn't remove himself any moment soon.
"So?" I prompted him, my voice coming out cold. "You've already robbed me of possible college place and now you want to waste my time? Get lost Tyler and do the world a favour by never getting found again."
"Now that's a slight exaggeration," He retorted, raising his eyebrows.
The amused glint in his eyes only made my anger swell up to the size of a balloon, inflating with each second that he held my gaze, daring me to look away. We stared at each other for a very long minute before I sighed heavily, realising that Tyler just wasn't worth my time.
"I really don't care," I retorted, "Just move out of my way."
I attempted to barge past him, but he didn't budge. He just remained put, staring up at me with a blank yet unnerving expression.
"Move!"
He shook his head slightly and opened his mouth to say something before closing it again. Taking off his beanie, Tyler held it limply in one hand whilst the other worked through his hair, feathering the straw strands until they stood tall and upright. As his mouth continued to work soundlessly, I huffed with frustration and grinded my teeth together. Why was he being difficult and what did he want from me?
Glaring at Tyler, I watched his eyes flicker all over the concrete ground, wandering aimlessly as he wrinkled his nose. I detected that personality trait of his, knowing all too well he was thinking deeply about what to say to me and that notion made me unclench my fists and exhale heavily. That was until I remembered that he was the reason Ms Smith was going to fail us and so I clenched fists again, this time digging my nails into my palms.
"Tyler James Miller, if you don't move out of my way right this minute, I will not be held responsible when I rip off your ballsack and stuff it up your ass. Do you hear me?"
Startled, he glanced up at me, astonished that I remembered his middle name when the only other people who knew were his dead sister, parents and Rosemary. Not even Blake received that privelege, although I could never figure out why he hated the name James so much. Sure, it was old fashioned, but it wasn't that bad.
Detaching myself from my digression, I met Tyler's wide eyes, watching the corners of his mouth twitch slightly before they settled back into their usual scowl. In the end, he heaved a deep breath and blew it out slowly before he finally stepped out of my way. I briefly glanced up at the cloudy sky to thank whoever was up there before unlocking and moving my bike to one side.
I could still feel his eyes on my back.
"Piss off Tyler."
Turning around, I glared at him before seating myself onto my bicycle and positioning my messenger bag so that I was comfortable.
"I don't know where to begin..." He trailed off and his nose scrunched up as if he was struggling to spit the words out.
Wrenching my helmet onto my head, I hastily fastened it before glaring at the guy in front me.
"Sorry would be a good start!" I snapped, finishing his sentence off for him.
"Yeah that," He mumbled quietly, slipping one hand into his pocket whilst he glared at the ground, dragging one foot across the gravel.
Surprised that Tyler agreed with me, my grip on the handlebars loosened.
Did I hear this guy correctly? Since when was he capable of an apology?
"What?" I breathed, feeling my jaw slacken and unhinge itself from my face.
"I said," Sighing heavily, Tyler glanced up and I froze. "I'm sorry."
I was looking at an entirely different person. The guy in front of me had a soft, apologetic grimace that was accompanied by an uncertain yet very intense gaze, leaving me completely lost for words. Dazed, I must have looked a sight, opening and closing my mouth like a goldfish before Tyler snapped me out of it.
"Ashley?"
I had to blink several times before I managed to summon the strength to break the reeling trance he had me under with his sincere eyes.
"Oh yes," I cleared my throat. "You said you were sorry, right?"
"Right," He nodded awkwardly, rocking back and forth on his heels and I could feel the thick, choking silence between us.
The simmering anger I had carried around all day for Tyler was slowly pushed back by the strange feeling I felt when he apologised; but it was nowhere near strong enough to quench the intensity of my fury.
I was still mad at him. Really mad.
Somehow, I managed to pick my jaw off the ground and composed myself, replying with a nonchalantly.
"Don't you think it's a bit too late? It doesn't change anything because frankly you're still a douchebag and I don't really care if you're sorry."
The instant my words left my heavy tongue, Tyler's face fell and I wondered for a split second if my anger was really justified. Then I realised, of course I had a right to be angry! He was the reason I was getting an F grade in Home Economics. I was going to be a laughing stock for failing the easiest elective at Riverdale High!
"What?" Tyler spluttered, taking a step backwards as if my reply had forced him to reel back.
"I don't care that you're sorry," I repeated, shrugging my shoulders but feeling unnerved that Tyler was stomping over to me, closing the metre long distance between us. "Are you deaf or just mentally deficient?"
"Why?" Hurt laced his voice, making it sound small but when his eyes flashed thunderously, I felt my insides tighten with frustration.
Didn't he get it? Ms Smith was going to fail us. She was going to stamp a blood-red F on my repord card to make sure every college I applied to knew that I had failed Home Ec.
I mean, who fails an elective that easy?
Furious, I jumped off my bike, letting it clatter to the ground and stormed over to where Tyler was standing, not caring that there was about a five inch distance between us. Remembering what he had said to me last week, I tossed his words back at him.
"Because: "Everybody said 'sorry' when Taylor died. Did that bring her back? So let's just say that your apology is worthless in the 'grand scheme of life'."
I should have felt smug about it but instead I was left feeling horrible. Here he was, making to effort to apologise and I was tossing his apology to the kerb like it was a piece of trash. I expected Tyler to spit in my face, shove me to the ground or whatever it was that he did to make the underclassmen fear him so much but instead he just closed the space between us and stooped down so that he was looking directly into my eyes.
I wasn't sure if I could hold his gaze but I managed to, wondering what smartass retort he was going to throw my way.
"Is that so? What about the part when you said "I wasn't thinking of anybody but myself... Please, you don't have to forgive me, but at least consider it. We can start over again...Please?""
My cheeks immediately flooded with embarrassment as I looked at the ground, wishing that it would swallow me alive. How on earth was this guy better than me at playing my own guilt-tripping game?
Noticing my hesitation to reply, Tyler clamped both his hands on my shoulders and stared at me.
"See? If I'm capable of forgiving you, then you should too," He whispered.
Showered in his warm, minty breath and the comforting aroma of his soapy-lemon aftershave, I looked up and opened my mouth before closing it again.
Tyler hadn't been this close to me since freshmen year.
My brain was too scrambled to come up with a good enough retort, simply because I lost train of all my thoughts. Taking a shallow breath, I was lost in a tide of blue and green that rippled back and forth. His pupils were dilated, a stark black - but the iris of his eyes made me splutter and cough with amazement and embarrassment.
How was it humanely possible for his eyes to be puddles of the Mediterranean ocean - a landscape of blue waves with a gradient of aqua that was tangled with pale, green seaweed. It was as if all the colours of the ocean were condensed into two pinpoints: his eyes.
He cleared his throat and raised his eyebrows high enough for them to disappear behind his long hair, jerking me out of my daze.
"H-Huh?" I stuttered, dumbstruck and unfortunately starstruck by just how handsome he was.
The corner of his mouth twitched in amusement making my cheeks burn.
Did he say something? Like a question that needed a reply? I couldn't remember.
All I knew was that I didn't feel angry any more. My insides weren't knotting up in anger, instead they were fighting old feelings that I had spent years repressing. He was making me agitated, uncomfortable and giddy.
I did not like this at all.
"I'll forgive you," I cleared my throat when it came out raspy, "On one condition."
Slowly, Tyler nodded, not once tearing eyes from mine. They flickered between mine, searching them earnestly and I felt my breath catch.
"Tomorrow we'll start from scratch. We'll experiment with different recipes and then eventually we'll try and personalise them with different ingredients. The only problem is that we're far behind everybody else so we'll have to spend time outside class to catch up. Are you ready for that?"
With my eyebrows arched and my lips drawn into a thin line, Tyler leaned back and nodded; standing up to his full height so that I had to crane my neck slightly to meet his eyes.
"Good," I sighed with relief as I lifted up my discarded bike and mounted it.
And without uttering another word, I took a deep breath and brushed my hair away from my face. Pushing off the ground, I worked my thighs and maneouvred around the clusters of freshmens who were still too young to drive. A small smile settle onto my lips when I glanced over my shoulders, surprised to find Tyler still rooted to the same spot and an oddly light-headed feeling followed me the entire journey home.
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[A/N: So this is one of the shortest chapters in my story but I didn't really want to merge it with the next because it ended quite nicely there so here you are.
Next chapter is called "Starting Over" and it's pretty self explanatory...Or so you think? ;)
Vote, comment and fan. (Pleaaasssssseeeeee, it takes H O U R S to write these chapters).
Peace and cheers and all good things,
- Kaddy]
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