I opened my eyes and smiled when I saw the golden-haired man snoring with his head lying on my lap. He had planted himself next to my bedside for the last three weeks.

He was starting to become just as bullheaded as I was. I guess if you spent enough time with someone, they started rubbing off on you—both the good and the bad traits.

I had written on the little board they gave me to communicate, telling him he should go home a thousand times. When Jenna slit my throat, she did some damage to my vocal cords. The doctor said they should get better over time, but any stress on them right now could harm them more until they were fully healed. I was told by the doctor I needed to keep my mouth shut for a few more days. If everyone in my family knew it would be this easy to shut me up, they might have tried removing my vocal cords a long time ago. Right now, my only forms of communication were my writing, sending annoyed looks, and the occasional middle finger.

Since I was an expert at the last one, it was the one I used the most.

I ran my fingers through Cam's hair gently, I didn't want to wake him up, but I needed to touch him to make sure this wasn't a dream. He stirred a bit, whispered my name, and fell back asleep. I smiled down at him. That silly boy was always calling my name in his sleep. I hoped this dream was at least a good one this time.

I didn't know how or why I survived what happened to me. The doctors had no explanation and looked at me like I had some sort of weird genetic mutation that gave me superpowers. They thought that maybe the large dose of morphine had something to do with it. It had slowed my heart rate and blood pressure down significantly. They weren't exactly sure if that was really it, but they had felt the need to find an answer and that was the most plausible one that existed.

All the movies I had seen were right about one thing. It was extremely hard to kill crazy. Luckily, I had always marched to my own beat or my marching days would be over right now.

"He's still here, isn't he?" My dad asked, rounding the corner to my room. My mom and Jax were strolling in right behind him.

My mom smiled down, watching Cam sleep peacefully next to me.

"You know he hasn't left." She said, smiling and answering for me. I tried to return the smile and winced when I felt the pull on my stitches. Smiling was one of those things I struggled to do still. I tried to laugh last week and popped some stitches, which to my horror, ended up adding another week to my five-star hospital room stay.

My mom was right about Cameron. He wasn't going to budge. After the incident, Cameron was placed on an administrative leave. It was standard protocol for when an officer discharges his or her weapon on duty. There wasn't much of an investigation into his role in Jenna's death. There were some questions brought up due to the nature of our relationship, but Ron went to bat for him stating he saw Jenna with the knife on my throat.

I found out from Ron that Cameron's commanding officer tried to pull him off the case when they found out I was missing too. Apparently he felt that Cameron was 'too close,' which could have clouded his judgment. According to Ron's version of the story, Cameron told his boss to "suck his dick" and punched him in the face. My baby went a little rogue in a very badass way. I would have loved to see him in action.

I still didn't even know how Cam found me in time and he wasn't talking about it much with me. I could see him struggling in the looks he gave me every second his eyes were open. That day had changed my Cameron too. There was a dark edge on his face that wasn't there before. It was like he had developed a room temperature standoffishness towards everyone, except me. If anything, he hovered over top of me anytime anyone came near like he was afraid someone would hurt me again.

"Stells sends her love. She said you need to get your voice back so you can join her on tour. She hates the band opening for her and has threatened to come nurse you back to health herself so she can get rid of them." My dad plopped down in the only other chair in the room when no one else moved to take it.

I rolled my eyes and fought back the laughter. The little Norwegian woman with the pixie cut was relentless in her pursuit of getting me on the road with her. She facetimed me earlier today and even offered to let me just come hang out until I got better. I had made my decision last week when Link stopped by for a visit to check in on me. I was going to take the record label up on the offer as soon as I could. I hadn't told anyone else that I still felt the pull to leave again. After everything that happened with Jenna, that desire to leave only increased tenfold.

There was something about almost dying at the hands of a madwoman that really puts life into perspective. It had changed my view of the world.

I was tired of being scared of my life. It may not be a perfect one, but it was the one I had and it was the one I needed to start really living.

I didn't even think I could have explained my reasoning to my family or Cam if I tried. The urge to leave had always been a part of who I was and would never change.

My dad knew I had made my decision. He could see it in my eyes.

I looked back down when Cam wrapped his arm around my legs and repositioned. He had to be uncomfortable. He was going to get stuck in this position if he kept sleeping like this.

I sighed. I was going to have to tell him soon. He would never understand. He thought he lost me, saved me, only to be on the verge of losing me again. I was still going to try to convince him to go with me again; he could use a little time to get away from all of this too.

Unfortunately, I knew he would never give in. Cameron was a hometown boy. He would stay here and live his best life and never need anything more. It was simple and poetic, but it wasn't the same dream I had.

Cameron was never going to accept my decision. He would fight me until the end over it. This wasn't his choice to make. Choosing this path didn't mean that I didn't love him with every fiber of my being; we were just always two people walking down different roads while we held hands over the median. We were at the point where our roads were about to split and neither one of us could find a way to clear the barrier between us.

It would be a lot easier to talk to him about all of this if I could actually talk.

"Are you ready to come home tomorrow?" Jax asked, pulling his eyes from his phone for ten seconds to remind me he was still in the room.

I nodded at him and he looked back down to his phone. His girlfriend had been on a rampage since he had disappeared. There was trouble in paradise. He told me she was actually jealous that Jenna touched his special parts. I almost died again from the shock. It's not like he could have stopped it. Jenna was a lunatic.

I had the feeling they were about to break up. Jax was taking it hard. We Miller's had emotions that ran deep into our cores. Once we held on, we never let go.

It was in our DNA.

"Jess, we are going to head back out. We just wanted to stop by for a few seconds to check in after Jax's follow-up with his doctor. It looks like Cameron has decided to take the rotation again tonight. I guess we aren't needed." My mom said, yawning. My Dad patted the arms of the chair he was sitting on and stood up to wrap himself around her. He bent down and kissed her shoulder as he held his large hands over her tiny ones.

"Bye Sweet Pea. If you need anything call us. We will be back in the morning to pick you up. We love you." He called as he pushed my mom from the room so she wouldn't linger much longer. Jax walked out behind them with his face buried in the phone.

Yet again, no goodbye. The kid still needed to learn some manners.

I tapped Cam's shoulder, trying to wake him. I couldn't stand watching the angle his neck was at. It was all crookedy and crunched. He would wake up with a crick in his neck and would be complaining about it the rest of the night.

He looked up in surprise and wiped the tiny bit of drool from the corner of his mouth.

I pulled the hospital blanket back and patted the spot next to me, the bed was small, but we didn't need a lot of room. Cam would snuggle up close to me and I would welcome the feeling of him surrounding me in the tiny bed. Even though Jenna was gone, I was still scared of what could happen to me. It was irrational, but I think it was the most normal feeling I had ever had.

"Jess, you're still healing. I don't want to crowd you." He said while yawning and then started rubbing his stiff neck. I knew it would hurt him.

My poor baby.

I raised my eyebrow and patted the spot again. He would have to do it if he didn't want me to kick him out. I had a nurse's button and I wasn't afraid to use it.

"Fine, you win." He sighed, kicking off his shoes and crawling in behind me.

I wiggled my body into him and he stiffened against me. His body, not his penis.

We both weren't even close to the sexual point yet, even though I was already thinking about him naked at least twelve hours a day. I would need some time to heal before we tried getting intimate again. He might not let me seduce him once he found out I was going to leave town, but I was still going to try.

His body tensed up because I made an involuntary excited squeak when he brushed up against me and he thought I had hurt myself. He was getting a little overprotective of me since that night. He barely let my parents near me. If he had his way, I would be in a suit made of bubble wrap when I left the hospital.

I couldn't imagine how he would feel once I was thousands of miles away from him.

"Are you comfortable?" He asked, wrapping his arm tightly around my waist.

I nodded and squeezed his hand. He tangled his fingers in mine and held on like he would never let go. I closed my eyes falling asleep to his deep, slow breathing against my back.

I loved him more than he would ever know.