(song: "Conscious" - Broods)

I felt his kiss against my lips.

    His touch still had the power to make my knees feel weak. I thought that it'd go away, or that I'd grow used to his touch like I had with Chuck, but it didn't.

    "Happy new year, Jenn," he whispered.

    "Happy new year, Patrick," I whispered back.

    The two of us sat on swings at the park. We were dressed up some of our best clothes, but after dinner was finished and the night drew in, we wanted a quiet view for the fireworks. Luckily there was a park nearby that allowed us to see the brightly colored lights flash in the distance.

    His fingers reached for mine and we swung in unison.

    "Last year around this time, I was with Valentina and we went to see the fireworks in front of the Bellagio. All the casinos set off the fireworks at the same time. She insisted on everything to be big and complicated. You requested seeing fireworks in a park. You are an easy girl to please, you know," he said thoughtfully.

    I smiled at him. I didn't need anything big as long as I had him. For a moment I forgot that I was pregnant with his child. I was the biggest complication of all. I wanted the moment to last forever. I wanted many more New Year fireworks and simplicity with him.

    "Patrick? Can I ask you something and you answer me honestly?" I asked.

    "Sure, lay it on me," he answered easily.

    I dragged my teeth across my lower lip and gazed at him. "If you hadn't met me, would you have tried to get into Stanford? Don't lie."

    I could tell he wanted to respond right away saying that he wouldn't have, but I had asked for honesty. He paused and considered carefully his answer before he spoke.

    "Well. . .honestly, I think I would have. I don't know, I guess it's always been a goal for me, sure. It's okay though, University of Nevada is good too."

    Valentina had left Patrick to ensure he'd follow his own desires and not follow her desires. I hadn't been so quick to realize what Patrick really needed. I knew he'd told me not to worry about his future, but with the possibility of a child, all I could even think about was the future.

    "You have changed my life for the better. You know that if I could do the same for you, I would right? I'd try and protect you in anyway that I could," I told him.

   He squeezed my fingers. "Where is all this coming from, Jenn?"

    I didn't answer that, I just continued with my train of thought. "Just know anything that happens from here on out, is me wanting the best for you. I'm going to make sure you have a wonderful life."

    "I want the best for you too. . ."

    We kissed as the fire lights exploded into colorful stars above us.

    I planned that to be my last good day with Patrick. The calm before the storm.

    I knew Patrick wouldn't just let me just break up with him without a reason, he was too smart for that. I had to think to myself about what he wouldn't—or couldn't—forgive.

   Only one answer came to mind.

"I really don't like the look you're giving me right now," Niko said with discomfort.

    Niko and I stood together in the employee room in front of their lockers. I had just finished getting dressed for work. I still was having problems with morning sickness from the pregnancy, and it was affecting my ability to work and be around food. The smell of hamburgers made me want to gag and every work day, that seemed to be all people wanted.

   "Niko, I need a favor," I began to say.

    "When a girl says she needs a favor, it's always something a guy should be afraid of," he said while he soundly closed his locker.

    "I'm going to end things with Patrick. He's going to want a reason for why I want to break up. I want to tell him that it's because I want to be with you. I just need you to back-up my story if he questions you." I watched my fingers while I spoke. I couldn't even look Niko in the eyes with what I was asking of him.

    He rubbed his hand over his face and groaned loudly. "Really, Jenn? Why would you want to break-up with Patrick? You love him and he is crazy about you. It doesn't even make sense."

    "Trust me when I say that I'm doing this for a good reason." I tried to assure myself of this more than him.

    "I really don't like this, Jenn. I make it a point in my life to avoid getting tied up in drama," He stated.

    "Please, Niko. I promise I'll never ask anything else of you again. Just please, help me this one time," I begged. I didn't even care how desperate I might have come across.

     I could tell he was going to give in. As tall and intimidating as he might have looked, he wasn't able to say no to a friend in need. Niko release a heavy exhale and nodded twice.

    "Fine. I'm only doing this because I really like you. I'll help, but this is the first and last time," he said grumpily.

     I reached out my arms to hug onto him as firmly as I could. I really owed him everything. He was helping me to save Patrick. I wish it hadn't taken getting pregnant for me to see everything so clearly. I couldn't save my brother from fulfilling his destiny to become a great success in college, but I could do that for Patrick. I could give him the life my brother never had the opportunity to enjoy.

     I waited until after work. I knew Patrick would come by the dinner after my shift ended. I'd avoided his calls and numerous texts over the past week and a half. During the times we were in school I told him that I was too busy or occupied to talk to him. I even deliberately tried to avoid the cafeteria. My strange behavior coupled with limited communication resulted in Patrick leaving a text saying he'd see me after work.

     When I finally went out to the parking-lot following my shift I could see Patrick standing beside my car. His expression was both confused and hurt. He lifted his head and tried to find answers in my gaze.

     "Jenn, what's going on? You've barely spoken to me since school started back," Patrick asked.

     I held my breath and willed the strength to commit to my plan.

     "Patrick, you know I care about you and I've loved our time together. You've been the best part of my life, but that part has to end," my voice trembled when I spoke.

     "What are you talking about?" Patrick quickly approached me and touched both my hands to hold onto them. "We were doing so great over New Years, why are you even saying this?"

    I opened my mouth, I wanted to lie and tell him something that would hurt him, but I couldn't. Tears just rolled down my cheeks in heated streams. "I can't do this anymore, Patrick."

    "Why not?" He asked and his voice was so pleading that it was heart-breaking.

    An arm wrapped against my shoulders and pulled me away from Patrick. It took a moment before I realized that it was Niko. He was fulfilling his promise. He was a much better actor than I could be. His face was as serious as a grave.

    "Because she wants to be with me. We went on a date before you two started dating and we see each other all the time at work. I guess something just grew between us and we want to explore it," Niko lied. His lie was told so convincingly that it sounded completely plausible.

    Patrick looked stunned at first and then hurt with anger.

    "Is this true, Jenn?" He asked.

    I still couldn't say anything. I couldn't lie or tell him the truth. I bit down on my lip hard and could taste my tears saturating them. All I could do was reach to squeeze Niko's hand and avoid looking at Patrick's face.

    So many things must have been running through Patrick's mind. He seemed too shocked to even form a proper response to everything. He lifted both his hands to his head and held it like he had a migraine. He turned on his heels and walked towards his car in a stupor. I almost wanted to tell him that he shouldn't drive in that kind of state, but I didn't.

    He unlocked his car door and sat in the driver's seat staring at his wheel for a few minutes.

    Finally, he turned on his car, and without even a glance into the rear-view mirror he drove off.

    When his car was gone and everything drowned in silence I broke down.

    It was over. Really and truly over.

    Niko tried his best to uncomfortably comfort me, but nothing could make it better. I just kept reminding myself that Patrick would be okay.

    Eventually, he would heal and go on to be happy.