Oh, Negan was angry.
No, Negan was fucking terrifying.

He flailed his precious bat back and forth over the crowd, seething this nuclear energy that made my bladder quiver.

I lay there paralysed, tiny as possible while I held my breath.

Black. Red. Bearded. Eyes alight with fury. Baseball sauntered over to dumb and dumber.
They looked about ready to piss their panties.

Lucile hovered a fraction from their noses, and he looked at them like two insignificant centipedes. "What have I told you two sorry chucklefucks before? And before that? And before that again?"
They winced as his bitches barbs clawed their faces.

"Are you fucking stupid or just WILLINGLY fuckin' ignorant?!" Boss-man gripped his belt-buckle, giving twit and twat the 'what the fuck' shrug. "You break it you buy it! So DON'T-."
Holy shit, his timber was a practical chainsaw as his orbs turned thinner than wire, "break my fucking merchandise, now help the lady up!"

I moaned in pain as calloused hands raised me to my feet. And for some reason, I couldn't look at him.

"You want to tell me what all that was a-fuckin bout'? Hmm? Richard? Morton?"
All three of us slunk away from his paws that crashed through the sky.

He suddenly made me feel like I was four and had robbed the class Lego.

But he didn't stop.
Negan grew.
His shape stretched three foot as he growled a earth shattering roar, "you dicks want to tell me why you thought it was okay to throw my shit around,"

I gave him a glare. He ignored me.

"And rip into the corpse bride here like Tiny Tim on a christmas fuckin' Turkey?"
Baseball quirked a brow as the bat ghosted my bloody nose.

We stood there gobsmacked.

"Do you need me to fuckin' sign it? Speak up, you galactic chumps!" Fuck, he ate us alive.

The two men gave each other terrified glances as they sweat like lawyers in hell. "Negan, sir, she-she—" I heard their little quivers.

The way they bowed their heads, the way they looked up at Big Boss who licked his curled lips, made me think they'd be on the naughty step.

"Spit. It. The. Fuck. Out" Negan barked. His tone dripped with dangerous octaves, head cocked to the side while his peepers lit in expectancy.

"She dissed us...She was acting like a crazy bitch, she tried t-t-to—." The man stuttered, taking a step back from Negan who took another towards him. "She had a grenade!"

"She-she-she." Baseball mocked, for a split second he gave me the most subtle smile in history. "Fucking talk like you haven't got a mouthful of Tammys pussy, Richard!"

Oh this was getting good. I watched it like a telenovela. My head dashed to each man as I stood ignored in the middle of the man-huddle.

Negan was a scary bastard. He was big. In control. Oozing with this threat like I didn't know if he was gonna pop a cranium. "Did you check her ass for a bazooka too?"

Morton nervously gagged, "she attacked us, disrespected the memory of our men. This bitch must have been part of it Negan, sir."

I giggled at his pathetic big boy voice as he blinked at Negan with begging eyes, and his cigarette stained finger pointed to me like the grass in third grade.

But Baseball was animated with these spectacular pantomime hands that threw up in the air as he leaned back and groaned.

I just had to open my big mouth.
I just had to make myself glow like a target.
But I couldn't help it.

"Christ, Morty. You've slept with so many men you're actually startin' to punch like one." I barked and promptly wiped my nose on Richards arm.

Here we go.

A deep laugh sounded from the boss's chest. A laugh.
He turned to face me. Hand on his cocked hip. Lucille vertical in his palm.

And he dipped down his head like I was some ant as his leather stretched. "You say somethin', little orphan Annie? What the fucks crawled up your ass and croaked?"

What the hell? Did he think I was funny? Was this his fetish, pissin' me off?

I jabbed my finger in this chumps gut. A warm, solid gut that pushed my finger back. "Yeah, I fuckin' did say something! You greasy, grinning, over grown man-child, the fuck you laughin' at?"

I couldn't read him. Ice, he was ice. Blank as snow as he gave me this half amused death glare.

"I am not property. I am not merchandise. I don't belong to you...not like these little bitches here. Heh-Negan and his bitch brigade," I chuckled, "where ya keep the your spare diapers?! Oh..."

I turned to the crowd that watched in silent horror, but as I turned to face big boss again, he had crept closer. Ope.

I reminded myself of a little spider reared up as I faced him head on, "thats what your buddies said, ain't that ironic?"

I gulped but sallied forth, remembering to stand my ground. "Bring it on then, cunt ball, we shit out the guvner, you ain't a slippery turd."

That was it.
I'd said everything I needed.
Now I was exhausted, a sweaty, panting mess with hands on my hips. "Rick will come for me, and he'll kill you."

Now I'd said everything.

I could have swore I heard the two stooges gasp.

Their heads snapped towards the slit-eyed, pale pile of venom that thrust her finger at big bad.

Negan slowly upturned his head.

Watched me from the bridge of his nose.

And a slow, vengeful grin curled at the corner of his lips as his white teeth shined in the roar of dawn.

One of his brows piqued, forehead furrowed, as if curious...or amused, or ready to rip out my heart. Probably all three.

Secretly I tensed, waiting for a back hand or punch in the gut.
But I waited for a blow that never came.

Instead he...ugh what the fuck.

After taking a few dramatised steps back and putting his large hands up in mock surrender, Negan and his barbed wire bitch laughed.

Jovially.

With his broad shoulders vibrating, head slung back, his hearty chorus reverberated through the crowd.

Of course, this caused the rest of the fifty or so flying monkeys to chuckle nervously at first, then laugh along freely like I was a mime on a Parisian boulevard.

I paled and twitched, his face contorted into sheer delight and fat tears bulged in his squidged eyes. "Damn, tiddler! You really fuckin' surprise me...you just took one hell of a whack to that fucked up little face, and your still comin back for more...hot damn..."

You bastard.

Negan catered to his audience, bowing and adjusting his balls as he stroked Lucille's polished skin.

He calmed for a single second, puffing out great snorts of air.

Then chewed on me again.

"I gotta say...you tryin' to look so scary right now...you look like a pumped up chicken with stuffin' up it's ass. It's god damn adorable! Its the kind of thing that just-..."

His face stuffed up with the oncoming laugh, beet-hued face crumpled with ecstasy as his hand waved like he couldn't believe me. "It-just-tickles ppdftt-ha! My balls!"

Oh god, the laughter. The tirade of un-stoppable laughter. Even the walkers were howling along.

There I stood, vulnerable, grieving, battered and bruised and this lunatic was laughing like some twisted jester.

Negan wiped at his leaky orbs. And he was watching me. Dark. Cruel. Tearing me to pieces with this white-hot glare.

I saw him, hiding behind his smile, the real him, the same face when he pounded Abe's brain, a snarling, obnoxious demon.

With a single flash of his hand, the monkeys silenced.
They were almost anxious.
The air was so congealed I could barely breath.

What I said next spewed out like vomit, unrepentant vomit, I pounced on him, his leather lapels warm in my fists as we stood boot to boot. "What on Gods green fuckin' Earth do you find so funny!? You smug, puffed up, greasy lunatic wanker! Did you just catch a look at your prick in the mirror but ain't realised its yours yet?"

I heard his growl, a saliva slick rumble as I got on my tippie-toes to reach his dimpled chin. "You're as funny as herpes you braying jack ass fucker! Seriously..." I sniffed at him, three deep snorts of air, "shit-breath...you was the sperm that won?! Shove that bat up your ass and fuck yourself."

If the crowd had cells they'd be recording.

I eyed the knife strapped to his thigh, "wow, that's huge!...I bet that's the first time you've heard a woman say that isnt it?" I laughed loudly at my own joke. "Negans little pecker."

For one brief moment I felt brilliant.

But, ought-oh...he turned it.

He gripped me, hard. And pulled me against him.

Our chests touched, his un-gloved hand snaked to grasp the back of my hair, and he used it to tilt my face to meet his gaping maw.

His hand was huge. Rough. Inescapable. Our brown eyes fixed together.

And the cool breath from his nose fanned my face as he eviscerated me with his tongue. "Say something smart. ONE. MORE. TIME...I fuckin' dare you." Negan's timbre was a 12. Gage blast as his nose touched mine. "I double dog dare you."

I hated myself for feeling a slow trickle of fear, but I didn't avert my eyes, my arms stiff as steel and nails digging into my sweaty palms.

All eyes on us...the saviours looked excited.

Yet, in place of a bludgeoning his thumb gently began to trace a soft path from my jaw to brow in light, tickling sweeps.

And he removed it only to smooth my blowing hair behind my ear, a strangely delicate motion that sent a shiver of unwanted electricity up my spine.

His eyes trailed down to my terrified mouth as his rough thumb-pad gently pressed my Cupid's bow, and he spoke so quietly only I could hear. "Shh, kid. Think before you speak. I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to kill you..."

"In fact..." I could have could have swore I saw his head tilt ever so slightly towards my mouth before he caught himself and locked eyes again. "There's a lot of things I'd like to do to you..."

I didn't dare look away, I couldn't afford to show weakness. "So many fuckin' filthy things, killin' you's at the bottom..."

"Still on it though..." I didn't realise how my deep breath pushed my boobs up against him, but Negan noticed.

"I fuckin' knew I should have brought the Blazing Hot Widow instead of you, Sniper Bitch." Baseball was on me. Over me. All around me. I was dizzy. I needed out. He was too close as the scent of bourbon and cigars and...women's perfume punched against my brain.

"I can tell your gonna be a handful and I ain't just talkin about your tits." Don't look at those shit head.
I shielded them from his view. But he didn't let me go. My sweater clutched in his palm as my nipples did the icicle dance.

"Pluussss..." he lazily slurred with a Virginian roll, tongue washing over his lips, "the thing about widows is... when they lose a husband they're so empty inside...but usually not for looonnnggg". Negan sing songed.

Giggles erupted around me from the men witnessing this shit show, and they 'yeah'd and whistled in agreement.

I struggled. He still clinged. And the tall man with the fat tash had sauntered to his side looking mightily glum about his situation.

Ah! Bastards!
I clawed at his hand! "You sick fucks." I bellowed. "Her name is MAGGIE! MAGGIE! How DARE you! You just killed the father of her unborn child. My FRIEND! Her HUSBAND! You sick freaks!"

I had those tears in my eyes. The dimpled chin. I was slapping at his wrists but he wasn't letting me go. "I SWEAR TO GOD, Negan...After what you did to us today...we're gonna kill you all."

No sooner than my mouth closed Lucille slammed into my stomach.

I doubled over. Coughing and spluttering. The blow almost eliminating my life force.

Negan's hands grasped my collar, our feet dancing for dominance as he slung me vertical.

I did the only thing I could do in the moment, I spat on him. This gloopy glob of bloody spew.

Mustachio man covered his eyes.
The saviours growled like I'd kicked their grandmother.

And as they rushed forward their leader stopped them with a sharp thrust of his palm.

I was afraid.
I was quiet.
I probably looked like one of Daryl's freshly killed possums.

Releasing one hand from my collar, Negan grabbed the free end of his scarf and wiped my spew from his face.

God, it happened so fast.

He dangled me.
Baseball picked me up by my waist and dangled me midair. "You FUCKIN' stupid little girl! Who the HELL do you think you are! You're a fuckin' ANIMAL. You think you wont be PUNISHED for this? You think you can just spit at me like a fuckin' crazed llama and get away with it?..."

I simply shrugged in my suspended state.

My toes touched earth. My brain imploded. And sunshine flipped nuclear. "Ohh, you're gonna find out how not cool that shit is, sweetheart".

I was sure I was.