It’s such a good thing that the incident with the paparazzi happened on Friday night because I don’t think I would be able to go out and work when my mind is so chaotic the next day if it had happened any other day. I can’t keep my thoughts straight and I’m still figuring out what to do. I don’t know if I should stay away or go to Simon and tell him I love Liam and I just can’t break up with him. Or maybe I should go to Liam, tell him that and then if he wants to, we could go together to Simon and tell him we want to be together. We would find a way to deal with the rest later, like his family and my father, and of course, the media. But I really can’t decide what to do. I just toss and turn in bed, too confused to think clearly and make a decision when I need it the most. I even think of calling Havi and Ariel to seek advice, but I’m sure they would just push me to Liam without considering what’s best for him.

On Saturday morning I’m still struggling and I’m sleep deprived, so I can’t trust my mind. Instead, I decide to rely on paper to make a list.

If I go to Liam I will affect his career and probably cause him to lose some fans. Now that Ariel is getting famous, the risk of them finding out about her secret relationship with Harry is becoming higher, which means that the media and fans could learn only Niall is single, but Ariel told me he met a girl the other day and it seems that things are going well between them. If the fans find out every single member of One Direction is taken, their fame will decrease. Fans would walk away, broken-hearted. It happens all the time; Havi showed me statistics a few weeks ago because I asked her to. I don’t want to jeopardise Liam’s career and I already walked away, I set him free. The others have relationships that are too stable to break for the sake of their career. Liam and I were the only logical sacrifice. Plus, if I go to him paparazzi will be all over him nonetheless, asking him what happened, how we got back together and whatnot. We would have to hide, which would make so little sense for his family because we didn’t hide before, we managed before.

If I don’t go to Liam, the heartbreak of walking away won’t be for nothing. His fans will be at ease because he’s ‘reachable’, even if it’s just an illusion and it’ll never happen, there’s still a small possibility I haven’t killed for them. But then, if he meets someone else and dates her, all the sacrifice will be meaningless and I would just lose him.

Why is it that not even putting it on paper helps? And why does it seem that going to Liam will bring more problems than staying away?

There’s a knock at my door and I frown, confused. Why is Dad so early? It’s not even noon. I walk to the door nonetheless, hoping nothing bad happened, although if it did he would call me. Unless it’s not Dad at the door and someone else delivering the bad news because he can’t even do that.

Panicking, I open the door just to feel how my whole body freezes when I see the cause of all my current predicaments standing in front of me, with a worried and frantic expression.

“Belle? Are you okay? I saw the gossip show and I came running here. Tell me you’re okay,” he begs, grabbing my shoulders as if he could make sure I’m in one piece. I can only blink, too shocked to see him at my door to reply.

“I-I’m okay,” I mumble, finally managing to utter the words he’s seeking.

He heaves a deep sigh, so relieved that even his shoulders relax and now I feel him leaning on me, resting his weight on me. “Thank goodness. I was so worried when I saw the paparazzi mobbing you,” he says and he sounds so exhausted that I kick the shock out and take his wrist to pull him inside the house. I guide him to the sofa so he can sit there.

“I’m all right. It wasn’t that bad, I was just surprised. I don’t care about what they said,” I promise him and his eyes watch me closely as his hands grab mine, desperately.

“They called you a cheating whore. Don’t tell me that didn’t hurt you, Belle,” he demands but I shake my head.

“They were just throwing accusations out of desperation, trying to make a boring date something bigger than it was,” I reassure him and he looks away.

“So you really were on a date,” he mumbles still avoiding my eyes and squeezing my hands tighter.

“Well… yeah, my colleagues set us up. He’s also a teacher,” I explain and Liam lets go of my hands, rubbing his face.

“Couldn’t you wait a bit before going on a date? It’s been barely a month!” he snaps, surprising me. “I haven’t seen anyone else but you were already on a date!”

“Hold your horses, Liam. What are you accusing me for now? It was just a normal date, it meant nothing. People have dates! That’s not a crime. We are not together anymore. I don’t owe you my chastity or whatever!” Now I’m the one snapping and he glares at me.

“It’s because you couldn’t wait a bit more that they thought you cheated on me!”

“They thought that because they are idiots desperate to sell drama because people love seeing how other successful people like you fail at normal things like a relationship just to feel better with themselves!” I rant, getting angrier by the second. “Why do you think people dig the drama and tragedy more than the good news? People don’t buy a magazine that says ‘Liam and Belle: doing great together!’ They’ll buy the one that says ‘Liam heartbroken after Belle caught cheating on him.’ That’s how sick this society is, it’s not my fault for having a stupid date after breaking up with you!”

He doesn’t say anything and I can’t stay seated so I stand up, pacing in front of him, ruffling my short hair, making my curls messier.

“I can’t believe I let you go just so you could date another guy so soon,” he mutters and I turn to glare at him.

“To date? It was just one! And you didn’t let me go, we broke up. We were forced to break up!” I snarl and he shakes his head.

“No, I let you go. I wanted to fight for you, to convince you to forget whatever you were thinking and just stay with me.”

“Then why didn’t you do it?” I ask, feeling hurt for some stupid reason.

“Because that was the best for you! You walked away so easily and I thought you wanted the calm and quiet of your old life. I thought I was helping you instead of keeping you in this sick world I’m part of!”

I laugh like a lunatic, like I’ve lost all the screws in my head and I know it’s not even funny. “Don’t you see? Even if I’m not with you I’m already in this world but now I don’t have you to have a reason to be in it. I tried going on a date and it didn’t work out. How do you even have a casual date? What do you talk about?” I rant, letting all the truth come out. “It was so boring, Liam. We barely talked and I couldn’t stop comparing him to you. And then when I thought the torture was over, all the paparazzi were there, waiting! I wasn’t even with you and it was worse, so much worse. I just wanted you to be there to guide me. They already know me, for fuck’s sake! And they think I cheated on you. Ha! With Steven? I was bored to death with him and I barely answered his questions. I’m sure even he agrees it was the most boring date in history!”

Liam laughs as if I just told him a joke.

“Don’t laugh, you jerk! It’s not funny!” I snap at him, wanting to throw a cushion at his stupid face. Argh, I’m so angry right now.

He stands up and goes to me, his eyes fierce and intense before he grabs my face.

“Silly Belle,” he says, still laughing and I push away, turning around because I don’t even want to see his face. I think I’ll punch him. But then he traps me in a back hug and I can’t escape, no matter how much I struggle.

“I know Simon asked you to break up because I need to be single, Belle,” he says and I stop struggling. “Now let me ask you, if he hadn’t asked you that; if he had let you do whatever you want, would you have stayed with me?”

“Ugh, why are you so dense!” I snap, breaking the embrace. “Of course I would’ve, you idiot! What? Do you really think I’m that good of an actress? I if were I would be working for the BBC not as a primary teacher!”

He laughs out loud and I just glare at him. Damn Liam and his split personality. Wasn’t he angry five minutes ago? Why is he laughing now?

“Silly Belle,” he says again and I’m starting to see red.

“Stop patronising me, Liam Payne or I swear to God I—”

He doesn’t let me finish because he just grabs me in his arms, giving me the tightest hug I’ve ever experienced. I freeze in his arms and stay there, just blinking.

“You’re silly because you’re getting angry when you’re confessing that you also love me.”

“I never said that,” I protest and he laughs again, pulling back to grab my face in his hands now.

“It’s implied. Now, are you telling me you didn’t pick up on the fact I told you I love you?”

“You didn’t say that,” I continue, stubbornly although all the rage is gone and now my insides are melting, the hole in my chest suddenly filled with butterflies.

He laughs again, that adorable and boyish laughter. “Okay, let me put it straight, then. Isabelle Reed, I love you. You are bossy, strict, oh so difficult to handle, stubborn, and dense and I love you like that. There, is it clear now?” He smiles at me so sweetly and I really think I’m melting and I’ll be left in a puddle on my floor. What’s my father going to think when he finds me like that on his floor?

I bite my lower lip and nod.

“And what are you gonna say to that, Belle?” he defies me, getting closer, brushing our noses together.

“You have more flaws than I,” I say and he burst out laughing, he even has to pull away and I can’t help the smile on my lips. “I mean, you’re selfish, arrogant, you lose control when you drink, you’re also stubborn and you are even denser than I am, and we all know you’re a piece of work, but I love you like that, too.”

He stops laughing and looks at me in the sweetest way, cupping my cheeks again and pressing his forehead against mine.

“Would you say that again?” he requests and I smirk.

“What? That you’re arrogant?” I question and he chuckles and shakes his head. “Oh you mean that part about me loving you? Okay, fine. I love you, Liam. I don’t know how that happened, but it did.”

“And now you can’t escape, okay? We’ll manage. Together this time. Don’t make decisions on my behalf without asking me first,” he says, his nose brushing mine.

“What about your fans? What if they leave because all of you are dating someone?” I question, really worried about this.

“Not all the fans will go, the ones that don’t care about our love lives and are fans because of the music we make will stay, and I think those are the best kind of fans so I’m okay with just them,” he smiles at me and I sigh as if the weight of the world was lifted off my shoulders. “Now, will you stop asking questions so I can kiss you?”

“But what if—”

He doesn’t let me finish, he just kisses me quickly, his lips warm and familiar and I can’t believe how much I’ve missed them. He hugs me and I hold on to him, deepening the kiss that makes my world spin around, so I hold on to him even tighter. His hands go to my hips and then down my thighs until he grabs them and lifts me until I wrap them around his hips and like that he takes me to the sofa, where he sits and I’m left on his lap. We don’t break the kiss in any moment.

As I ruffle his hair and kiss him like a starved kid allowed inside at dinner, I realise I was given a second chance to fight for that slippery happy ending and I better give it my all this time. 

-:-:-

I dunno you, but I love that the fight even in the last chapter hehe.

Well, there you have your happy ending. Be thankful to Mila cos she threatened me when I told her I wanted something different. The epilogue will be up tomorrow or maybe later today? Who knows ;)

Bel, xx