On Wednesday morning, I wake up feeling empty, much the same as I have for the past several days. I trudge to the kitchen to get some coffee, relieved to see that my mom has left the pot on for me. I sit down at the table and start to flip through my messages. There are too many from Ethan for me to count. I know he's worried about me. I know I will eventually have talk to him and make a clean break.

I force myself to get into the shower to clean up. As soon as I lie down in my bed, I realize that I won't be able to sleep any more. I've slept enough to last me for a month. I check my messages again, and a new one grabs my attention.

It's from Ethan, sent at 11:55 AM today: I'm coming to see you. Be there in an hour.

It's 12:40 PM now. It's too late to call him and make up an excuse. He's already on his way.

I rush to my bathroom to throw on some makeup and brush my teeth. Just as I'm emerging from my room, I hear a knock on the door.

How am I going to tell him? What am I going to tell him? My anxiety is making me feel completely ill again.

"Hey," I force a smile and try to sound casual. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to talk to you because you're avoiding me," he tells me plainly. "I can tell there's something wrong, Sarah. Will you please talk to me?"

"Yeah," I sigh and begin to turn away but he stops me before I can get too far and embraces me in a marvelous hug.

"I missed you so much," he murmurs a warm greeting against my neck.

I pull away painfully. "Can I get you some coffee?"

"Sure," he says, keeping a close eye on me. I can tell he's unsettled about my demeanor. I'm unsettled, too.

I bring two cups of steaming coffee to the table next to the sofa, and then I sit down across from Ethan.

"Come over here!" He playfully yells at me, beckoning me to join him on the sofa. I comply, so he pulls me close and I lean my head on his chest.

"So, now my sweet angel, what's really going on?"

I gather up my courage and ask him, "How do you know you really want me? How do I know you really want me? I mean, what if we get a few months or a few years down the road, and you realize that I'm just not the girl you thought I was?"

He's silent for several moments and then offers, "You are the one I want. I just know."

"How?" I ask, pulling away and looking him in the eye.

"I know because I can never stop thinking about you. I know because even though I met you under the worst possible circumstances, you still made me smile. I know because I couldn't wait for you to wake up at the hospital so I could see your beautiful eyes again. I know because I enjoyed every single moment of visiting you, playing cards with you, watching stupid videos with you and laughing til our sides hurt. I know because no one else in my whole life has ever made me feel the way you do."

My heart swells with his generous words. Even so, I can't shake the fear that he'll find me burdensome after a while, a fear that was fueled by his sister's words to me. "You've taken care of everyone in your family for so long. It seems kind of unfair that you have to take care of me now, too."

He looks at me curiously for a long time. As a look of understanding slowly crosses his face, he finally blurts, "Jessica said something to you."

I look down at my fingers and I bite my lip. I don't know whether or not I should tell him the truth. I feel like a snitch, but I finally nod ever so slightly. I look up at him expectantly.

His expression turns into one of fury. "What did she say?" But before I can respond, he tells me, "Don't answer that." He gets up, pulling his phone out of his pocket and punching the buttons. He walks out of the room, but I can hear him clearly when he shouts, "What did you say to Sarah?!" He pauses momentarily and then demands, "I want to know exactly what you said to her!" He's quiet for a few minutes, presumably listening to his sister. Finally, he tells her, "You had no right to say anything like that to her! None of that is true!" He listens a bit more and then finally says, "I love you, Jess, but this is none of your business! I'm in love with Sarah!"

A small, grateful smile crosses my face, and the weight of my out-of-control emotions finally lifts. He comes back to the living room and kneels down in front of me. "Sarah, have I ever lied to you?"

"Not that I know of," I reply, smiling sheepishly.

"Have I ever given you a reason not to trust me?"

"No," I tell him again.

"Then please believe me when I say that I am so completely in love with you that, if I could, I would ask you to marry me right now. See? I'm even kneeling down in front of you. But I know you're not ready for that, so I'll wait for the right time. You will never, ever be a burden to me. And I want to be with you." He drops his voice to a whisper. "Forever."

He kisses me, gently at first, until I pull him tight. He slowly gets up off the floor and joins me on the couch, never breaking the kiss. He deepens it, making me open my lips and I even let out a satisfied sigh.

"Are you sure you don't need to take care of yourself for a while?" I ask him, trying to quell the last lingering bit of fear.

"I am taking care of myself, Sarah, because you are what I need. And you're taking care of me, too. I still can't believe you love me, and it means so much to me that you're a part of my life. I don't see any of this as one-sided. We both give and take, and you've already given me so much."

He hugs me again and when we finally part, I tell him, "I'm sorry I doubted you. Please forgive me."

"Forgiven. But I want you to keep this in your brain: You will never be a burden to me. And do you know what?" I shake my head. "There will probably be times that we both find it hard to love one another." My eyebrows crumple in confusion. "Because we're human, and feelings are just feelings. But love is much more than just a feeling. I'm sure you've seen that with your parents. I know I saw it with mine. They got irritated with each other, they argued, they had seasons where they functioned more like a corporation than a couple, but the one thing they consistently did each day was to choose to love one another. And I promise the same to you, Sarah. I love you now and I know I always will, but I also promise to choose each day to continue to do the things that show you that I love you. I promise to love you in practical ways, and yes, that might mean taking care of you sometimes. And who knows? Some day down the line, I may be a burden to you when you have to change my diapers."

I cringe and burst out laughing at the same time. "I hope not."

He laughs with me, kissing me again. "My point is that love isn't just a fleeting feeling and I know you know that. You just got spooked by my sister because she spoke to your fears. So this is me, telling you that when it comes to my love for you, you have nothing to fear."

When I pull back, I lean my head against the back of the couch. I reach my hand up to caress his face, running my thumb over the edge of his goatee. "I love you," I whisper.

"I love you, too." And then he leans over and kisses me, a kiss full of passion and fire. He leans over far enough that his chest is pressing against mine and it feels like he's going to push the air out of my lungs, but in a good way. Before I know it, we are all hands and lips and heavy breathing, and I don't think I've ever been so excited in my life.

Suddenly, Ethan moves away from me and looks at me with his eyes wide. He starts stumbling over his words and I find it amusing. "Wow, I...I'm sorry."

I start to giggle a little at his adorable bumbling. "There's nothing to be sorry about."

He starts to recover but the redness in his cheeks is priceless. "I don't...I mean, we shouldn't...well, it's like...."

I hold my gut and laugh deeply. "Are you trying to tell me something?"

He nods, taking a deep breath. "I just want you to know something about me, and I'm not sure you'll like it."

"What? Another prosthetic leg?" I ask, trying not to giggle anymore.

"No, I just think...well, you know I...I mean...."

"Ethan," I say in a matter-of-fact tone. "Are you trying to tell me that we shouldn't go any further because you're planning to wait until marriage?"

He nods again and looks at me with embarrassment, and maybe a little bit of remorse.

"I know that," I say, shrugging my shoulders. "I think that's just the kind of guy you are. And you are a Christian, after all."

"Well, not all Christians do the right thing," he says, laughing a little.

"I know," I assure him. "But I know you will."

"That doesn't bother you?" He asks.

"No, why should it? It means you have a conviction and enough character and integrity to carry it out. And it also means you that respect me. How can that bother me?"

"But how do you feel about it?" He presses.

"Maybe I've never quite had the conviction you do, but I never thought it appropriate to just give sex to any guy I happened to be attracted to. And I've never loved anyone enough to give myself away. So...." I shrug. His face flushes deeply as he looks down, seeming relieved but still somewhat embarrassed.

I lean down so I can look up into his face. "Until now," I whisper. "But I'm willing to wait for you."

He grins so widely that it lights up his entire face and I can't help but be drawn into his happiness. He kisses me again, several more times, actually. But this time, we keep our hands in respectable places. He finally leans his forehead back into mine. "I knew there was a reason I loved you so much."

After a bit more time just holding each other, having missed each other's arms for almost a week, Ethan gets ready to leave.

I walk him to the door and he tells me, "You have to know a little about Jessica to understand her. She's kind of a free spirit. She escaped a lot after my mom died, either holing up in her room or going out with friends. I escaped, too, but in a different way. That was her way of coping, I guess, so she wasn't around much. That means she didn't help out much either. I think she feels guilty for letting my dad and me bear the burden of keeping the family together. And I think that maybe she still hasn't fully grieved over Mom's death."

"That makes sense," I tell him.

"Yeah, but it doesn't excuse what she did. She owes you an apology."

"So, are you still taking me to Patrick's wedding?" I ask shyly.

He grabs me and hugs me playfully. "Of course. If I had my way, I wouldn't go anywhere without you ever again."

* * * * *

Yay! They worked it all out. Now, hmm, what else is in store?