❌Please oml this is for satire  and comedy  purposes, don't come for me❌ 

I don't think I need to explain this scenario, everyone has read it, like, a million times before.

Hanyu

) Passed away, gone, never to be seen again

) He was so utterly embarrassed and confused

) He also apologized to your Dad repeatedly

) In all honesty, he thought you said "Jia Daddy" since you'll call him that just to bother him

) Didn't know how to explain that to your parents so he just froze up and wouldn't stop apologizing

) "Mr. L/N, I'm so sorry I just- I'm so sorry."

) Anytime he comes over after that, your parents will tease him about it, since he quite clearly didn't mean any malice

Zihao

) Smooth-ish Mf™

) Made up some bullshit about it sounding like a term of endearment in Chinese

) *Sweats* 

) Your parents believed him so it was all good

) Still mentally slapped himself for being so dumb

Xinlong

) *Sigh*

) Bro the audacity and fucking confidence of this boy

) Just continued eating his food like nothing happened while your parents were giving him death glares

) "I believe they were talking to me young man."

) "No Sir, I'm fairly certain they were talking to me. You see, your daughter/son/child calls me Da-"

) *Slap*

) Naturally, he's no longer allowed over 👍

Zeyu

) He probably plays it off the best out of everyone

) Pretends to be really nice and sweet and just kinda-

) "Oh I'm sorry Sir, I just thought since I was closer..."

) "It's okay son."

) Looks over at you and smiles

) "You smooth motherfucker."

Mingrui

) Starts rambling

) And won't fucking s h u t. U p

) Making it worse and digging a bigger hole for himself

) "Oh, I'm sorry, I-It's just a nickname they call me, b-but not like that- I just umm-"

) "Mingrui, I love you, but please for the love of god stop talking."

) Your parents didn't really care, they found it funny

[I'm so sad.]

Shuyang

) Poor lil bby

) He got so embarrassed

) He didn't even know w h y he tried to grab the salt he just did it on instinct

) He didn't say anything and your parents just stared at him

) You had to help him out of it

) "Ooookay, everyone, I can take your dirty plates!"

) "But we're not-"

) "I said give me your plate."

Now for all you dirty minded fucks out there how are gonna say things like "yOu CaN't CaLl YoUr S/o DaDdY wItHoUt It BeInG sExUaL" istg, it is in fact a perfectly wholesome and acceptable term of endearment, it's only bad it you make it, so don't fucking make it. 👍

Have a great day/night!

- Author 姐姐, 妹妹/哥哥, 弟弟[?] [Author is dysphoric :''), bare with me for the time being.]