Chapter 16 - "For A Thousand Years"

I did not know what mess was I in once I realized that I loved her. It had to be a good news and I had to be happy, but there was something that kept me away from still accepting it. May be I was not sure. But sure about what?

The whole night passed by. I kept on thinking of her and realizing every instant that I loved her. It did made me smile but then the thought crossed my mind, she must've been thinking that I did not love her back because I didn't tell her anything.

Stupid! How could I even expect her to not think this way? I myself showed her that through my reaction. Oh, how badly messed up it was.

I went to college the next morning. Nothing felt good. It was everytime that we both entered the college together. But today, she wasn't there with me, next to me and it felt so, so bad.

Well, I was walking through the corridor towards the class knowing that it was about to start when I saw her going the same way. I had DD with me, and so I pinched him hard.

"What?!" He shouted, immediately. I swear, he wasn't quick at times.

I signalled towards her with my neck and his frown turned into a smirk. I glared at him in return and next thing I knew was him shouting her name while I stood behind the pillar.

Before she could come, the bell rang and as if it was a chance for her to escape, she ran.

In the class, I sat behind her intentionally. I thought she'd look for me but she didn't. I kept staring at her all the while, how she dipped her head down to write and how her hair strands disturbed her. However, one thing that I failed to notice were her eyes.

I looked into them when she turned back to look at me, and I felt that I was caught. Well, I didn't mind that. I wanted to smile but I couldn't as I saw her eyes, red and swollen. Just because she had been crying!

My eyes turned glassy as I tried saying something when the professor kicked her out.

That third meet of ours came as a flashback when she was not allowed in the class because she was late and I had shamefully thrown a paper at the professor just to be kicked out along with her.

I didn't know about that, but this time, I had to be with her. So, I began disturbing Ali, who was busy in listening to the lecture. As the professor saw me, he simply pointed his finger out and as if my respect didn't matter, I ran out.

I neared her, my eyes still threatening to spill some tears while my lips so badly wanted to kiss her and ooze out her pain for which I was responsible.

Thinking to do a lot more, I lost myself the moment I locked my eyes with hers. All that I did was heaving a helpless sigh and wiping off her tears, slowly stroking her eyes.

I couldn't see her this way anymore and so I walked away.

###

Later at night, I decided to talk to her.
Walking across the buildings of our hostels, I thought to text her when I heard a tingling sound. Looking here and there, I walked over to the empty street.

I went over, following the way of the sound. The street lamp lightened the otherwise dim street. I stood near a tree, my eyes traveled to the footpath, where she sat with a guitar in her hand. I blinked fast, looking at her as she moved her fingers along with the strings of the guitar. The soft music echoed, as she started singing.

Heart beats fast
Colours and promises
How to be brave
How can I love when I'm afraid to fall
But watching you stand alone
All of my doubts suddenly goes away somehow

I felt my heart piercing, listening to how intently she sang. Her voice possessed deep pain that I wanted to rub off.

One step closer

She paused as the music of the guitar still continued to play owing to her hands. Before she could continue, I felt her gaze traveling to me. Her hands stopped working on the guitar as well as her lips. I wiped away a tear of mine and signalled her to continue. That was when she started singing again, her gaze fixed on me. Her eyes said a thousand feelings that her heart did not tell me yet.

I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don't be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more

And then, as if it was over, she got up and ran away, rubbing her tears off.

I inhaled sharply, not knowing what was happening.

###

The next morning, I was sitting in the garden, our usual meet up place when Ali came over.

"How are you?" He asked.

I simply nodded, not knowing what to say.

"What about Avni?"

My heart skipped a beat at her name while I shrugged, trying to act normal.

"Are you well prepared for the exams?" He asked, and I realized that we were having our exams soon. Oh! Exams.

"Exams! Oh no." I panicked.

"It is the last semester anyways. You shouldn't be failing." He tried to provoke me but well, I wasn't in a mood.

"As if I have failed ever before."

Silence followed. I couldn't be saying much. It was surprising for all of them. The only person with the most blabbering tongue in our group wasn't speaking. Well, the reason was obvious.

I couldn't talk to Avni last night, but I will. I was determined, I'll not let her live in dark now. I had to tell her that I loved her back equally. I had to.

The same night, I texted her when I stood outside the college.

Come down. I am waiting.

What?

Itni mushkil baat nhi ki hai mein ne. I am waiting for you outside the college. Come out.

I ain't coming anywhere.

Come or I'll come upstairs. Wese bhi, it's dark and no one is here.

Neil.

Avni. Come.

No.

Yes.

Fine.

Good girl.

It was not after minutes that I saw her coming out of the hostel. She walked over to me and stood, clueless.

I tried saying something but failed. Coming up with something different in my mind, I grabbed her hand and dragged her along with me.

###

Excited for the next? What do you think Neil will do? Do share your views.

Till then
Much Love