Chapter 9 - "Surrendering To Your Happiness"

It had been quite a while since I had known that my feelings grew something more than just friendship towards Neil. Since they were not that strong, I had concvinced myself to be within my boundaries. Moreover, Neil wasn't my type. I knew we could never work out. I couldn't be affording a heartbreak in my very first love experience since I knew he wasn't a serious guy. He always took love as a joke, like breaking hearts for him was quite easy! I wondered how?

It was a week after his birthday when DD told me that another girl had proposed him and he had accepted. It wasn't a surprise for me at all. He must have broken up with the previous girlfriend and here's a new one. I wondered how even these girls would wait for their turns as if it was so efficient for them to afford heart breaks.

"Hey sweetheart!" He came cheering as he thumped beside me on the stairs of the college.

"You'll again break her heart." I whispered, audible to him.

"Huh? Whose?" He asked, putting off his bag.

"Another girl proposed you." He didn't understand whether I questioned or told, so he just hummed in response.

"Stop it Neil please." I wasn't shouting, but I wasn't quite either.

"Hearts are not for sale. You can't just buy one for a week and then rip it apart as if it was a piece of paper. Even when the paper is crumpled once, it never returns back to it's previous state." I softened a bit, my eyes moist.

"Avni" was all that escaped his mouth as he wiped my tears gently.

"I have told you before as well. I am not breaking hearts. I don't leave any girl just as I never claim that I love them. They love, they leave. That's it." He explained, gripping my hands.

"Really? Okay. Maan liya. But then, when you know that they have to leave, why do you accept their proposals?" I asked, pulling my hands back.

"Time pass. I am never serious about them."

And his sentence left me distressed. My brows furrowed and I bit my inner left cheek, gazing at him disappointedly. Was it that easy for him? Love isn't a joke, is it? For him, it was. I mentally thanked myself for not crossing my limits for his love because clearly, he would have never been serious about me.

"How could you do this?" I muttered under my breathe as I felt his hands on mine again.

"I won't ever do it with our friendship. I promise." I could see that truth and sincerity in his eyes, but who knows, how wrong I was back then.

"Thank you." I uttered as he pulled me to him. I rested my head on his well built chest, our hands entwined. Many people around us burned, but they didn't know the solace that I felt in his arms, my own little heaven. I had stopped loving him, surrendering, for his happiness,

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"Wake up girl! Come on." I heard Rhea screaming as I tried lifting my heavy lashes to open my eyes.

I had lied down to take a nap in the evening but unfortunately, I had overslept. And here was Rhea, irritating the hell out of me!

I slowly got up, clinging to my blanket. "Tu chhup nhi reh sakti?" I mumbled, rubbing my eyes.

"Kitna soyegi?" She sat beside me on the bed, locking her phone.

"Kese aana hua?" I asked, pretending to be formal.

"I am confused Avni!" She pressurized on her words, squeezing her eyes.

"What? Tell me." I asked, somewhat serious.

"Are you in love?" She asked out of blue making me gasp. I turned around to her completely as I shot a boring glare at her.

"Where did that come from? 'You' were confused, right?" I diverted the topic, sensing where this was leading.

"No. Yes, I am confused. But it is about you! I see. Avni, you are in love!" She spoke, making me furrow my brows. I again gazed deeply at her, rolling my eyes.

"Okay. With whom?" I asked, knowing that I would successfully drag her away from this topic.

"Neil." She sighed and I wasn't surprised since I knew she was talking about him only.

"Shut up." I shushed her getting up and running to the bathroom.

As I came out, she was still sitting there in the same position, staring at nothing in particular.

"Pagal hai tu." I shot a lazy smile as I started brushing my hair.

"He loves you too." I heard her say as my hands stopped working. My hold on the hairbrush loosened and my lashes didn't dare to let my blink. My breathe hitched and my heart sank. My eyes kept on widening, as I slowly dropped the hairbrush, causing it to fall on the dressing table. I tried to deny that but words failed to leave my mouth. I felt my lashes heavy, not being able to show the slightest of movement.

"I see it in the way he looks at you. I see it in his eyes, in his care. Some smiles and some gestures are just reserved for you Avni. He loves you and I am sure, cent percent sure." Rhea's words brought me back to the world, as I gasped softly, turning around quickly.

"Sh..Shut..up!" I could say it only.

"He doesn't." I could've said the whole complete sentence but my throat had dried and I was gulping the lump after every second.

"He does. You have to realize it. You know, I can bet. He will propose you, one day." She got up and stood in front of me.

"He won't." I had slowly started breathing again.

"Okay. Lagi shart?" She extended her hand and unknowingly, I shook hands with her, starting a new chapter of my book.

Who knew, it was the biggest mistake of my life!