-
Jungkook woke up a little earlier than usual, despite only getting a few hours of sleep. The party had dragged a little longer than intended.

Jungkook doesn't know when Jin hyung and the others went home. He remembers excusing himself to go sleep as he had to wake up early.

He quickly showered, made a little extra effort to look atleast remotely alive as he covered his dark circles with a little concealer, adding a little blush to get a little colour on his otherwise pale face.

He had to travel to Busan today, having a book reading and signing session there. He didn't like travelling very much, but for instances like this, he couldn't exactly refuse as his publishing agency had organized it.

Jungkook didn't want to travel in the company car. He was infact looking forward to travelling in the bus, just wanting to experience a little normalcy from his past life.

He looked at the clock, 5:00am, and he hurriedly grabbed his things, slipping into his chunky books as he made his way out of his room.

The bus he was hoping to catch took the longer route, going through remote villages and he was excited for the ride.

His thought vanished as he took in the sight in front of him.

The excitement seemed to disappear as his eyes found the two bodies tangled together on the couch.

Guess Jimin didn't go home last night.

Jungkook should have probably been used to this by now. These kind of sights were not uncommon.  Infact, Jungkook had found the pair cuddling like this almost always, and yet, his heart cracked a little every time he saw it.

Jimin was lying on Taehyung's chest, their legs tangled together as Taehyung held him in his arms.

They looked so perfect together. Like they belonged in each other's arms.

Funny, how despite not being soulmates, Taehyung and Jimin fitted together like two perfectly fitted gloves.

Jungkook hesitated, his eyes looking at the watch on his hand as he sighed softly.

There was still nearly 2 hours left before Taehyung and Jimin would wake up, and they both were sleeping there without any blanket on.

The heater was turned off as well, making Jungkook frown as he noticed Jimin shivering a little.

Jungkook went into the guest room and bought a blanket, drapping it carefully onto the pair, making sure to tuck it on the edges so that both of them were covered.

His eyes lingered on his mate's face, taking in those features which looked so relaxed right now, so innocent, a huge contrast to when the elder was awake.

He smiled. Even though his omega was hurting, watching his mate in someone else's arms like that, Jungkook still smiled.

He was atleast happy to know that Taehyung was relaxed, that atleast Taehyung was a little happy.

He turned the heater on, before taking a last lingering look at the sleeping pair and walking out of the house.

His mood had considerably dampened and now, he wasn't really looking forward to riding the bus.

Deciding he would just take a cab, he called for an Uber, getting in and sighing softly.

So much for the excitement.

-

Jungkook reached the venue much earlier than expected. So he decided he would just work a little on his book.

The words he just wrote stared back at him, taunting him, for those words were the things he could never voice out.

(Excepts from Jungkook's book are in italics)
_

"Loving you feels like a punishment, and yet I cannot stop. I love you like breathing, so much so that I will die if I try to stop and yet, I'm dying anyway, the pain is killing me anyway", Aera whispered, her eyes on the figures dancing in the moonlight.

She smiled at the pair, eyes looking up to the sky.

"To whichever God is up there, if you are listening, please, please give him all my share of happiness, even if I wither away as he strives, if he's happy, if he's content then I shall be fine"

_

Jungkook worried his lips, a frustrated sigh escaping  as he closed his eyes, trying to stop his emotions from overclouding his writing.

Lately, his emotions have been transcribed into words on the pages of his book, and Jungkook didn't know if he wanted this book to be published.

It felt too raw, too intimate, too real.

Maybe because it was. His character, Aera, was an extention of Jungkook's real life.

He saw Aera as himself, tangled in a web of unrequited love, knowing the man she loves will never be hers.

Perhaps, this soulmate bond and cursed love of his will finally take away the last thing Jungkook cherishes the most, his damn ability to write stories.

Because lately, all Jungkook has been writing are confessions. Confessions of his true feelings.

His mind wandered off to last night, when Taehyung had dragged him to his room.
-

Flashback starts*

Jungkook doesn't know what he did wrong, the pheromones that Taehyung was releasing seemed angry, making his omega distressed as well.

"What the fuck did you say to Jin hyung?", Taehyung bellowed, eyes flashing with anger.

"I-I didn't say anything to him. Just thanked him for the party. Did something happen?", Jungkook was worried now.

Did Jin hyung say something to Taehyung?

Taehyung let out a bitter laugh.

"Ofcourse. Ofcourse you didn't say anything. All you need to do is show that damn puppy eyes of yours and make yourself seem pitiful. Did you enjoy making my brother angry at me? Huh? Did you enjoy ruining this relationship of mine as well?"

Jungkook couldn't understand what was happening. He knows for sure that he didn't talk to Jin hyung about anything that could rise any suspicion.

"I-I really didn't say anything Taehyung. I swear", Jungkook tried to explain, his words frantic as his mind whirled in panic.

"As if I'll believe someone like you. Stay away from my brother. Do you understand? Better yet, stay the hell away from my family. You don't have to pretend to like them, so just stay away from them. You are like vermin, corrupting everyone around you. I can't even stand the sight of you right now"

Taehyung had left, while Jungkook stood there frozen. He had finally felt a little happy, with Jin hyung and the others. Finally felt a little joy.

He should have known it wasn't going to last.

He can never be happy. Even for a few fucking minutes.

He is so stupid to even hope. So fucking stupid.

Flashback ends*
_

" You sure are fast man, how long have you been here for?", Yugyeom broke Jungkook's thought process as he joined Jungkook on the bench.

"Not too long. When is the session going to start?", Jungkook asked, closing his laptop, blinking back the tears that had brimmed up.

Truth be told, he had been sitting there for 3 hours, but ofcourse, he wouldn't tell Yugyeom that.

"In about 30 mins. The venue is already set up, just waiting for the reporters and  audience. You were working on that new book of yours?"

Jungkook nodded, a little hesitant. Was this book really his new one, or perhaps just something Jungkook was writing as a means to un-burden himself of his feelings.

"That's awesome man, great to see you already started. You haven't told me yet what it's about. Give me a little brief or something"

Jungkook frowned. Was he ready to share that story? He wasn't even sure if he wanted to publish this book.

"Just a typical love story. Still working on the depth of it all so I'll give you a brief when I'm a hundred percent sure of the direction I want to go in"

Yugyeom nodded excitedly.

The reading session started, with Jungkook reading every word, every sentence with as much emotion as he can muster.

Listening to Jungkook read his book, Yugyeom couldn't help but feel awed.

This was Jungkook's element, his safe zone. The young writer looked like so relaxed.

Yugyeom knew about Jungkook's family not being accepting of Jungkook's career choice, he couldn't help but wonder how the young writer's family would feel if they ever see and hear him read like that.

The younger was gifted, no doubt, with both an ability to write emotions so vividly, and an ability to capture anyone's attention with his melodious voice and amazing storytelling.

Jungkook was made to write. There was no doubt about that.

-
So, thoughts?

Also, I messaged my husband, who is in Fiji right now about this book, sending him the quotes I used in the beginning. 

This man legit sent a quote back, telling me I should use this one as well.

The said quote in question:

Why is this man giving me ideas about how to deal with his ass if he ever hurts me in the future?

You wanna know what I think? I think my husband is suicidal 🙂