"I only take in my toxic memories
Growing more deeply embedded in my heart
They force me further, corner me
Even my habitual self-blame" – Trauma by EXO, 2018

Today, Jimin was finally getting dispatched from the hospital. His stitches had finally healed, and for the most part, Jimin's injuries he had sustained had healed as well. He had even gained a few pounds during his stay. He had to meet with a nutritionist and a couple counselors as well as it was mandatory for what had happened to him.

Jimin knew, even if he wanted to deny it a lot, Jimin knew that he needed help. It might take months, years, maybe even a lifetime for him to heal, but he was determined to help. He missed his work and he wanted to get back to it as soon as he could. And if he needed to see counselors and nutritionists to help him get back to some form of normalcy, he would.

His Mom had visited a few times after the massive blowup in his hospital bedroom. His Dad had caught the first train out of Seoul and hadn't even contacted her about it. Jimin was disappointed, but he couldn't say he wasn't surprised.

Bangtan too had visited him. Hoseok and Seokjin cooed over him, pinching at the color returning to his skin. Jimin would whine and tell them to stop, but he secretly enjoyed all the attention he was getting from his members. Yoongi brought him some rings to put on his fingers, but Jimin was disappointed to find most of his rings didn't fit him anymore. Taehyung, being his platonic soulmate, would compliment him every time he walked through the door. He would even leave for a couple minutes and come back just to make him smile. Namjoon would bring him some of his One Piece novels to read, remembering how much he used to like them. Jungkook was honestly just pampering him. He wanted to make up to Jimin and get his hyung to forgive him even though he already had. Jimin shook his head, watching their young maknae run around to retrieve a water bottle or go downstairs to get everyone a snack. He wished he could come to terms with forgiveness, but he assumed he had a lot of guilt that hadn't subsided yet.

Every time he did it, it would make his day until they had to leave for real.

Jimin would lay in his bed, staring up at the ceiling until he finally got exhausted enough to fall asleep. Jimin would try to sing songs to himself, but he didn't sing very many. He wanted to save his voice for the stage he was so sure he was going to return to.

One day he'd stand in front of a stage again, and when it came, he would never feel more alive.

|-|-|

Jimin slowly rose to his feet, one of the nurses helping him into the shower. Jimin had been taking 2 showers a day, sometimes even more if the thoughts got especially bad.

Jimin removed his hospital garments and the remaining bandages of his mostly healed wounds.

The water was scalding, just how he liked it. He stood, staring at the walls as he began to viciously clean himself. The nurse peeked behind the curtains every few seconds he was washing himself.

Jimin wasn't allowed to stand in the shower. Hospitals were very big on the safety of their patients. No matter what, if they wanted to go out, they had to be accompanied by a member of staff and they had to be helped into non-standing positions so they didn't hurt themselves.

Jimin knew the petite woman was just doing her job, but every time she peeked behind that curtain, he just wanted to swing it shut in her face. She was making him feel like he had done something wrong, like he had done something to deserve having to be supervised every five seconds of his life.

Jimin was a while before he was finally done scrubbing himself. His skin was red and hot to the touch. The nurse handed him a towel and Jimin stepped out, beginning to dry himself off.

The woman left, finally giving his ever so desired privacy. Jimin flinched at how rough and raw his skin felt under his fingers. He should be used to it by now, but the more he scrubbed, the more it seemed like there was something he missed while he was cleaning, like he had something itching under his skin that he had yet to get.

Jimin put his own garments on. They weren't the thin, white garments he had received when he had first arrived. Instead, they were clothes Seokjin had brought in a bag from the last time he visited.

"I thought you would feel more comfortable wearing something of your own."

Jimin did, and he appreciated Seokjin for thinking about him like that.

Seokjin had brought him a big purple sweater, a pair of comfy pajama pants, a pair of expensive looking underwear, simple socks, gym shoes, a beanie, a mask, and a pair of sunglasses. It felt right knowing he finally had something of his own, something he could claim.

These were his things... The things that he had worn once before most likely.

Jimin felt like he was getting a little bit of his life back.

Seokjin had texted him to let him know that he was there. He was in the underground parking facility just to be safe. He didn't want to pick Jimin up at the door because of the dangers of sasaengs (if there were any left), fans, and reporters lurking about to catch a glimpse of him leaving.

Jimin took one last look at his hospital room before he left, sighing as he hoped to never see it again.

Jimin rode the elevator downstairs to the underground parking lot. A few spots away, he saw Seokjin's head peaking out of a car, waving over to him.

Jimin waved back and started to walk towards him.

Jimin climbed into the passenger seat, messing with his oversized rings, sliding them up and down on his fingers.

"Welcome back, Jiminie."

Jimin looked back at him, a grin spreading across his face, "It feels... strange to be back. But I'm glad I am..."

Seokjin took his beanie off, ruffling Jimin's hair, which Jimin greatly protested to, and his smile became wider.

They drove off, the hospital finally a distant memory as Jimin leaned back to watch the buildings pass by.

|-|-|

Jimin didn't remember falling asleep, but he was woken up by Seokjin's soft, soothing voice and his hand shaking his shoulder.

"Minnie~ Minnie wake up~"

Jimin rubbed his eyes. It was considerably darker than it had been when Seokjin picked him up, but he didn't mind at all.

"Everyone's waiting for you..."

Jimin sat up, stretching and slowly getting out the car. He followed Seokjin to the familiar, yet distant dorms he too used to inhabit.

"I left Hoseok and Yoongi in charge of the feast. We wanted to welcome you back properly."

Jimin rubbed his eyes, yawning as they rode the elevator up to their apartments.

He was so close... So close to going back to who he was before... So many struggles were laid out before him, he knew it, but for now, for now, he wanted to enjoy this moment.

Seokjin slid his keycard into the door reader and Seokjin stepped in, "That reminds me, we have to get you a new keycard. Your old one probably doesn't work anymore."

"Hyung!"

Jungkook was the first to the door, hugging Jimin and almost toppling him over. After many days of subtle and comfortable skinship, he had grown used to all the different touches of the members. They were familiar, safe, and nothing short of comforting.

"It smells good..."

"Seokjin wanted to throw a small party for you to celebrate your return. He left to pick you up and left us in charge of the dinner! And your Mom popped by with some homecooked goods for you and us!"

Jimin's gaze softened, his Mom cared so much that she did things that she didn't even need to do for him. Like bring him homecooked food and some for his members too.

Jimin smelled foods he could barely remember the names of. He knew there was kimchi and some type of beef in there too...

"It smells good!" Namjoon said, walking into the hallway with a dimpled smile and dramatically rubbing his stomach, "I'm starving. Seokjin-hyung wouldn't let us eat lunch and we ate breakfast very early..."

"Stop complaining! You'll get to eat if Yoongi and Hoseok didn't burn the dinner."

Jimin removed his gym shoes and started making his way to his room. Hoseok looked up from his laptop with a gasp.

"Jiminie you're home!" Hoseok yelled, bounding up from bed with a smile.

Jimin placed his things on the bedside table, "Yeah..."

Hoseok came over to him, ruffling his hair with a wide smile, "I'm so happy... The sunshine line has finally been reunited!"

Jimin rolled his eyes, "It won't be a reunion until we can get Taehyung to share rooms with us again. And considering Jungkook probably has his own room still-."

"Actually, quite contrary. Taehyung and Jungkook kind of moved in while you were gone, and they had even taken to cuddling in the same bed because they missed you so much. It was... A hard sight to look at."

Jimin looked away with a guilty expression. His bed was so neat and the surrounding area looked identical. He didn't know his absence had really caused so much pain, but else should he expect?

"Jiminieee get in something comfortable and come down to eat! The food's almost ready!"

"Ok, hyung!"

Jimin looked through his drawer for a pair of pajamas. He slowly turned to Hoseok, "Umm... Hoseok? Can you leave for a little bit?" he held the clothing close to his chest, staring down at the ground.

"Oh! Of course, Jimin!" Hoseok quickly put his things away and exited the room, closing the door behind him.

Jimin was alone, he had privacy, just what he needed.

Jimin undressed himself from the clothes Seokjin had brought him and changed into a big, comfortable pajama set one of the members (probably Yoongi or Namjoon) got him for Christmas one year. He believed he had seen some new things in his drawers that he didn't remember being there before, but could he really rely on his memories?

Jimin stepped out, walking down the stairs and turning the corner to see almost everyone at the table. Hoseok was lugging a chair from the other room into the sitting room.

"It got a little uncomfortable sitting at a table for 7 with only 6... But now you're that you're here..." Namjoon said rubbing the back of his neck in a slightly sheepish manner.

When Jimin took his place at the table and smiled at them with that smile he always smiled, it felt like they had finally found the seventh piece to their puzzle.

Jimin was home, Jimin was safe, and he was with them...

Jimin was finally home.

"The nightmares that endlessly woke me from my sleep
Disappear as I count to three
I let my heated insides burn
Making my day feel much lighter" – Trauma by EXO, 2018