BORN TO DIE ╱ DRACO MALFOY
꒷꒦ · ˚.‧ . written by ella . . . © -lostgardens
054 ━━━━━━━━━━━ ❛ t-r-u-c-e ❜

Walking into potions class, Olivia hugged her books boredly, not ready to meet Snape's monotone drawl or his dead eyes. Since she hadn't told him a single thing when they had their meeting, she knew the man was going to not let her forget it.

She made her way over to her seat, but before she could sit down, Snape's voice stopped her. "Do not take your seats yet. I have an assignment for you all today that will require a partnership." He paused, letting the muttered cheers sound all around. Olivia just remained quiet, standing up straight again. "Partnerships that will be selected by me."

Everyone around them groaned in annoyance, knowing that the professor despised them all and would choose the worst possible partners. Snape didn't seem to mind the annoyance; in fact, Olivia believed he reveled in it. It was his source of power, she supposed.

Walking away from her seat, she went to stand with her friends. She crossed her arms over her chest, holding onto her books, as she stopped next to Theodore. Students continued to pile into the classroom, muttering confusion when they noticed everyone still standing. Snape just remained quiet.

But finally, when the bell signaled the beginning of the lesson, the professor faced them, holding a roll of parchment in his hands. "Today you and a partner will brew the antidote to uncommon poisons." Snape took a step closer to them. "You should have gathered the ingredients as your homework assignment," the man reminded the students.

Some students muttered curses under their breaths, probably having forgotten the assignment that had been given; others just did not want to be there.

"Why must we work with a partner?" asked Olivia, sighing.

She would do much better on her own, as always.

Snape ignored the whispers of the students around him and focused on Olivia. "Because I've said so," he replied.

Olivia narrowed her eyes at his tone before rolling her eyes with a scoff. She didn't want to work with anyone, especially not a Gryffindor. Most—none of them liked her, and she was sure that she would end up doing all of the work anyway. And, while she appreciated her friends (excluding Malfoy for the moment), she didn't want to work with any of them either. Pansy hated potions, so she wouldn't do the work. Theodore simply joked around too much and never got his work done. Blaise would focus, so he wasn't the worst option. Crabbe and Goyle were Crabbe and Goyle. Daphne wasn't her friend, but they'd be able to get their work done if they were partnered together.

And Malfoy...

Snape began listing off partnerships, cutting into Olivia's thoughts. She didn't listen to the names being called, not caring if they weren't hers or her group's names. Shifting on her feet, she heard Snape say Pansy's name—she was paired with Theodore. Blaise was soon after—paired with Daphne. A few more pairs were announced, and then...

"Mallard..." Snape's eyes landed on the girl, and there was something in them that twisted Olivia's stomach. She shifted from one foot to the other as she scowled at the man. "And Malfoy." His eyes moved to the boy, to whom he referred.

"Why him?" Olivia inquired, annoyed.

Snape raised his brows, and everyone focused on the girl, their eyes dancing between her and the boy who stood near her with a smirk on his lips. "Is there a problem that I need to be aware of?" the man asked, acting clueless.

He knew good and well... Olivia glared at the professor for a second longer before she inhaled deeply, planting a fake smile and carefree look on her face. "No, sir. No problem at all."

"Very well," Snape drawled, then focused back on his scroll.

He continued to read off names as Olivia looked up at Malfoy. The boy was staring down at her with that proud smirk he always sported. She despised it and him. Huffing out a breath, she faced forward, ignoring his stupid grin.

Once the professor was done listing the partnerships, he told them to take their seats. And so they did. Students made their way to either their usual table or their partners. Olivia dragged Malfoy over to hers, where she usually sat with Pansy.

They gathered everything they would need to brew the potion, and luckily, both Olivia and Draco had done their homework assignment, which meant they had plenty of ingredients to remake the antidote if they messed up. She didn't think they would, however. She knew that she was fantastic at potions, and Malfoy wasn't low on the list either.

Flipping open her book, Olivia ignored the burning gaze on the side of her face as she found the page she was meant to be on. She took in a deep breath as she brought one hand up to fidget with her necklace. She didn't know why she was still wearing it. He had gotten it for her after all. But she felt as if taking it off just because they weren't speaking was a bit much.

Or maybe it wasn't. She didn't quite know.

She and Malfoy worked in silence for the first few minutes, both reading over how they were supposed to brew this antidote. The chatter around them was ignored as they tried not to remember the fact that they weren't speaking but were eventually going to have to if they wanted their potion to be successful.

And by "them," it was Olivia.

Olivia was the one ignoring the chatter; she was the one trying not to remember that she wasn't speaking with Malfoy and that she'd have to eventually talk to him if she wanted their potion to be successful. She wanted to curse Snape and his undoubtedly planned attempt at buggering her.

Once Olivia was done reading, she began organizing the ingredients as Malfoy watched her closely. She ignored the feeling his gaze sent through her body and began working. She placed the cauldron on the magically-controlled fire burner, letting the water come to a boil. Malfoy then ground the Graphorn Horn into a fine powder using the mortar and pestle. By the time he was done, after muttering curses under his breath as he struggled to grind it, the water was boiling. They placed the powder in the water. Then they had to wait ten minutes.

That ten minutes felt like the longest of Olivia's life, from ignoring Malfoy's gaze as she glanced around the classroom, seeing everyone waiting along with them, to glancing over to Snape, who sat at his desk in the front of the class. The man's eyes flickered up to meet her's, giving her a curious look, like he was trying to figure out what she was thinking.

She wasn't thinking anything besides the fact that she was bored and didn't want to be in the class, which said a lot because it was her favorite subject. She quickly looked away from the man, keeping the walls in her mind firmly in place. It wasn't like she thought he'd invade her privacy by entering her mind without permission, but the professor was a skilled Legilimens, so she wasn't going to risk it.

Taking in a deep breath, she looked around the room once more, her eyes finding her friends at each of the tables they sat at. Pansy was boredly checking her nails as Theodore looked over his book. Blaise and Daphne (the girl was not her friend, but she still focused on her) were concentrated on their work. Crabbe and Goyle looked as if they hadn't a clue as to what they were doing, but what warmed Olivia's cold heart a tiny bit was the fact that Goyle was doing the reading.

She contained the lift at the corner of her mouth as she inhaled and moved her focus to her book. To pass the rest of the time, she decided to start grinding the Billywig Stings and Chizpurfle Carapaces together, using her own mortar and pestle. Unlike the horn powder, this one wasn't supposed to be fine. So once the powder was coarse—still thick and not as broken down as the other—and the ten minutes were up, Olivia placed the powder mixture into the cauldron. And then she grabbed some fire seeds and put them in as well before removing the cauldron from the heat.

She placed the cauldron atop the tabletop, then slid it over to Malfoy. He gave her a shocked look, seeing as she touched the no doubt hot, freshly-off-the-heat cauldron with her bare hand and didn't even flinch. She ignored his look, dismissing the fire of the burner with a flick of her wand.

Her mouth opened and closed as she stared at him, her eyes darting between him and the cauldron. Then she huffed out a breath, narrowing her eyes slightly. He just smirked, knowing that she was about to speak to him after nearly a week.

"You can do the stirring," she told him. He went to retort, but she lifted a finger, quieting him before he could even say anything. "Remember to only do it periodically. I don't need you messing this up."

"Alright," he muttered. His eyes lingered on her for a long moment, and he practically had to rip them away from her, something still on his mind.

It was clear to her that it was not what he wanted to say, but she didn't care. She just pulled her book from her bag and began reading, waiting for the mixture to cool down. It had to get to—she double-checked her potions book to make sure she was thinking correctly—room temperature. With that on her mind, she began reading.

She looked up every time she saw Malfoy go for the spoon to stir the antidote, watching above her book and through her lashes as he lazily did his task. The first few times, she paid no mind to how bored he looked, his cheek resting on the palm of his hand as he used the other to barely hold the spoon and stir. It was fine. He was stirring it, and that was all that mattered. But she couldn't help that something deep in her stomach was churning, worried that he was going to ruin it.

She'd seen how bad a potion could go just by having the same class as Seamus Finnigan. The boy blew up anything and everything, even when he wasn't using magic. It was shocking to Olivia to see how careless he could be.

After a fourth time or so looking up, Olivia could not take it anymore. She snapped her book closed, dropping it down to the table, not even caring if she lost the page she was on, and grabbed the spoon from Malfoy's hand. She sighed, giving him an annoyed glance. "You're stirring it wrong," she gritted in a quiet and sharp tone.

He held up his hands in defense. "Sorry, I didn't realize there was a right and wrong way to stir this," he retorted, narrowing his eyes back as he dropped his hands.

"Of course you didn't," she mumbled, setting the spoon down.

Then they went quiet for a moment, both huffing under their breaths. It was so frustrating for Olivia, and the feeling was mutual for him. They both got under each other's skin like no one else, and neither knew how to stop it. It was so bloody annoying.

"What!?" they snapped at the other in unison, swearing that the other had said something about them under their breath. Neither had, only mutters of annoyance.

The eyes of others in the class fell on them for a moment, including Snape's. The man squinted his eyes, studying them closely as students snickered at the outburst of the two. Let's just say that it hadn't gone unnoticed by their peers over the last week that Olivia and Draco were arguing—or, at least, something close to arguing. They weren't talking; that was all anyone knew about the situation, including their friends—excluding Lucas, who wouldn't tell a soul what he knew.

It didn't take about another minute or two for the antidote to be cooled to the right temperature, which meant they were done besides putting it into the phial. But she'd do that after Snape confirmed that they'd been successful. Olivia raised her hand, signaling for the professor to focus on her.

"Do you need something, Miss Mallard?" the man asked boredly.

Students glanced up at the sound of the professor's voice, looking at him and then at Olivia. She ignored their gazes and said, "Yes. We're done." The hope that everything turned out was running throughout her as she watched Snape stand up from his seat and slowly make his way over to them with calculated steps.

"You two are the first to be done," Snape said with no emotion in his tone as he stopped behind them. Olivia's eyes darted around the room, noting all of the students still working. The feeling of someone staring at her made her gaze focus on them. Granger. The girl had a sour look on her face, perhaps upset that two Slytherins—well, mainly Olivia—had finished before her. A smirk played on Olivia's lips as she taunted the girl with her eyes. "Let us hope that your quickness paid off well," the man added.

Taking a glance at Malfoy, Olivia kept the smirk on her face. "I'm certain it will."

Snape ignored her confidence, leaning over the cauldron. He studied their antidote for a moment, letting nothing on his face. Olivia watched him curiously. "The color is correct. Smell is correct," he noted, and then stepped back. Letting out a breath, he clasped his hands in front of him. "Congratulations," his usual monotone voice continued. "You seemed to have not completely failed at this task." He sounded almost as if he had expected them to fail. "Phial it, mark it with your names, and then place it on my desk." And with that, he began to walk away.

"Did you expect us to fail?" Olivia asked, raising her brows.

Stopping in his tracks, Snape slowly turned around to face them once more. He just stared down at the girl, keeping his face flat and emotionless, like always. He was quiet for a long moment, and Olivia didn't think he was going to answer her.

"No," he finally admitted, then went over to the next person with their hand raised.

Olivia picked up the cauldron and the phial and began making her way over to the sink at the back of the class. She didn't think she'd make a mess if she put it in the phial at their table, but it made no sense to risk it. Plus, it gave her an excuse to get away from Malfoy.

Well, it would've if he hadn't followed her.

Rolling her eyes at his steps behind her, she stopped at the sink. He stopped beside her, his eyes burning into the side of her face as she didn't even pay him mind. She set the cauldron and phial down on the counter and inhaled deeply. The smirk on his face made her realize something in that moment.

"You were stirring the antidote lazily on purpose, weren't you?" She already knew the answer, but she wanted him to confirm it. Her hands rested on the edge of the countertop, and her eyes focused on the sink, but out of the corner of her eye, she could see his smirk grow.

"It got you to talk to me, didn't it?" He sounded so smug with his response.

Olivia couldn't fight back the smile that made its way onto her face. It wasn't a smile of joy or annoyance; it was one that appreciated his efforts. She breathed out in amusement as she shook her head before finding his eyes. He looked at her with something in his gaze that she couldn't quite place. And she didn't want to.

She countered his look with one of boredom, then offered him a tight smile. "I'm upset with you," she told him, then paused for a moment. Glancing back, she looked over at the phial and cauldron. "You can phial the antidote." She patted her hand on his chest before brushing past him. She didn't miss the amused scoff that he let out as she went back to the table.

Her eyes caught onto Pansy's as she sat back down on her stool. The girl was giving her a knowing look with a matching smirk. Olivia's focus then fell onto Theodore, who was looking at her with raised brows on his amused face, though there seemed to be something hiding behind his expression. Then she glanced at Blaise, who also smirked, his more subtle than Pansy's. And finally, Daphne only had a blank expression, not showing any of what she was feeling.

Olivia ignored all of their looks, picked up her book, and resumed her reading.

≀⋆⁺₊⋆ ꗃ 𖦹⨳✺

"All I am saying is that there was some flirty energy," Pansy said, defending herself after class, trying to keep her voice as quiet as she could. She and Olivia walked the length of the corridor, trailing in front of the rest of their group, which meant Draco was behind them as well. And since Pansy was talking about him and Olivia, she didn't want him to hear.

Olivia sighed, closing her book. "There was no 'flirty energy,' as you put it," she countered, glancing back at Malfoy, who was chatting with Blaise and Theodore. Crabbe and Goyle walked behind him like good little bodyguards, and Daphne was nowhere in sight. Olivia hadn't been listening that closely, but she believed the girl had said something about going to the library.

"There was!" Pansy retorted sharply, her voice a hushed whisper.

"What are we talking about?" Lucas asked as he came up beside his sister.

Olivia opened her mouth to answer, but Pansy beat her to the punch. "Olivia's flirty energy with Draco," she replied, thankfully still keeping her voice low.

Lucas furrowed his brows, glancing at his sister, who had an annoyed expression twisted on her features. "Oh, did you tell her about..."

Olivia's eyes snapped at him. "Lucas," she cut him off with a sharp tone.

"I guess not," the boy muttered as Pansy stopped in her tracks, furrowing her brows.

"Olivia Katherine Mallard." Every part of the girl's name was enunciated. Pansy's voice was no longer quiet, causing Olivia to wince. The way the girl spoke, her name sounded almost exactly like how her mother said it, which was never a good sign. Pansy came around to stand in front of her best friend; her eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Is there something that happened between you and Draco that you're not telling me?" she inquired, raising her brows as she placed her hands on her hips.

The boys were sure to have heard her then.

Olivia felt the approaching presence of them behind her; their conversation was no longer happening. She could feel him standing behind her as her eyes stayed trained on Pansy, who had looked up for a second, no doubt meeting Draco's eye, before focusing back on Olivia. She could tell the girl was waiting for an answer, but she didn't have one. Well, she did, but not one she wanted to say aloud.

"Yeah, Olivia. Is there?" Malfoy whispered into Olivia's ear, leaning down slightly so that his mouth was next to her head.

Olivia nearly flinched at his sudden closeness as her eyes shot to his. She glared at him and his stupid smirk for a split second before looking at Pansy again. "I don't have time for this," she muttered, side-stepping her best friend and continuing down the corridor.

"Is it really difficult for you to admit?" Malfoy called out after her. Olivia stopped her tracks and turned around to face him as she crossed her arms, watching as he made his way towards her. "You know, it's quite hurtful when you do things like that," he admitted, only loud enough for her to hear as everyone watched them. He looked her over once, his face twisted in annoyance but his eyes swimming with hurt, then walked past her, making sure to bump her shoulder.

She whipped around to watch him walk away, glaring a hole into the back of his white blonde hair. And then a sudden feeling washed over her. Letting out an annoyed breath, she faced her friends, who were staring at her curiously. Pansy had her arms crossed with the boys standing behind her.

"Fine," Olivia clipped, lifting her chin, causing Malfoy to stop in his tracks. The girl's gaze fell between him and the others as she threw her arms up. "I kissed Draco." She paused, taking in another breath as everyone except Lucas and Malfoy's jaws dropped. "The night we were in the Black Lake."

Pansy eyes were wide, and her mind was racing with thoughts of that night. Then she squeezed her eyes shut when she remembered, facing the ground. Then she looked back up, focusing on Olivia. "That's why you ran off," she said quietly.

Olivia nodded before fully turning to Malfoy, who tried to hide the surprise at the fact that she actually admitted it to their friends with a narrow-eyed, annoyed expression. She walked up to him, sneering like he usually does as she met his gray eyes.

"There, Malfoy," she gritted through her teeth. "Are you happy now?"

And without waiting for an answer, she walked away.

≀⋆⁺₊⋆ ꗃ 𖦹⨳✺

It was nearing the end of the week, and Olivia and Draco were still no longer speaking since the incident in the corridor. It was fine with the girl (she was lying to herself.) Now that what happened between them was out in the open with their friends, Olivia found it useless to not be on speaking terms with him. But she wasn't going to be the first to apologize, and if he thought otherwise, then he was greatly mistaken. She'd already admitted to kissing him; what more could he want?

That weekend, the third-year students and older would be going to Hogsmeade again. Olivia needed to get Lucas's list of gifts from him so that she could search for them when they went to the village. And she needed to create her own list—she loved having friends, but she hated getting gifts. At least she had one less to get that year.

That was what was on her mind as she sat in McGonagall's class, listening to the woman drone on and on. But her thoughts were quickly dismissed when a paper bird landed on her books in front of her. It didn't take a genius to realize who it was from. He wasn't creative enough to come up with a new way to send a note during class, apparently. But she didn't mind.

Her eyes lingered on McGonagall for a moment, feeling the burning gaze on the back of her head, before she looked down at the paper bird and began unfolding it. She hoped it was an apology note so they could go back to normal. Whatever normal was for them.

Draco's neat and pretty handwriting made her envy her own. Her's wasn't messy by any means, but she still disliked it. She believed everyone despised their handwriting at least at some point during their lifetime—her time was the present. Her eyes studied the words he had written. Meet me in the Astronomy Tower at sunset.

She hoped that he wanted to meet to make amends. The tension in their group was getting to be too much to handle. And frankly, she was tired of the pointless fight, which surprised even her when she first realized it. Perhaps that was wishful thinking, or perhaps not. All she knew was that she wasn't going to say anything close to "sorry" until he did. Was that childish and immature? Yes, and she was fully aware of that.

The hatred of being glad that he was breaking it—glad that it wasn't her—lingered about in her mind as she folded the parchment, different from how he did, now into a square instead of a bird, and placed it into her book for safekeeping, not that it was a necessary thing to do. And then she placed her elbow on the table and rested her chin in her hand.

His eyes still lingered on her, and she felt a smile creep on her face.

Yes, she was glad the end of the fight was nearing.

≀⋆⁺₊⋆ ꗃ 𖦹⨳✺

As she sat in the library, Olivia felt as if time couldn't go by any slower. She was next to Goyle as he read from a book she had assigned him. The only thing she had left to do before she could meet Draco was finish this "lesson" with Goyle, and then she wouldn't have anything else to do the rest of week besides classes the next day and then go to Hogsmeade that weekend.

Glancing up at the clock on the wall once more, she realized that she needed to go. She focused on Goyle, letting him finish his sentence before she spoke. "That was very good." She sent him a small smile as he met her gaze. "But I have to cut our lesson short today. I have to go make a T-R-U-C-E," she explained, standing up from her seat and keeping a smile on her face as she began to gather things. Spelling out the last word was her way of telling Goyle that she wanted him to figure out what it was and meant.

"Truce," he replied, thinking about the word for a moment. "An agreement between enemies or opposing forces to stop fighting or their conflict." He watched Olivia closely as she closed her bag and gave him a proud look.

"Correct. Very good," she told him, receiving a smile in return. She reopened her bag and dug around, then pulled out a chocolate frog and handed it to him. As he took it, she leaned down and placed a short kiss on his cheek.

And with that, she left the library, going down the corridors all the way to the Astronomy Tower, where she was meant to meet Draco. As she climbed the staircase, she could smell the fresh air, and she relaxed a bit. Stepping on the top step, her eyes come into contact with the back of the boy's head, his blonde hair shining bright. The sunset was in front of him as he stared out at it, completely oblivious to the girl moving to stand next to him.

When she stopped at the railing, setting her bag down on the floor and placing her hands on the metal rail as she looked out at the swirled colors in the sky, he turned to look at her. "You came," he said, sounding almost surprised. She couldn't blame him for that.

She simply nodded. She didn't know what to say, and she was sure he didn't either. In theory, it should've been an easy conversation to have. One of them apologizes first, then the other follows; they talk their issues out, and everything is fine and dandy again. But when it came to them two, they were always told emotions were a weakness—to never let another know what they were feeling, to never be the first to apologize. Neither knew how to start.

It was brave of her to assume that was the reason he called her up there. She hoped it was.

"Why did you ask me up here?" she asked, staring out at the sky.

He studied her for a long moment, and for the entirety of it, she didn't meet his gaze. Then he let out a breath, focusing on the sunset in front of them. "I wanted to..." He paused, trying to find the right words. "I wanted to apologize for not... uhm, for not understanding how you were feeling after... uh, what happened."

His struggle to get the words out would usually be amusing to Olivia, but, in that moment, his apologizing didn't feel right. She was the one who ran away after what happened. She was the one who said that nothing happened and that it meant nothing. She knew how he felt about her—or at least, assumed—and yet she still did something that would get his hopes up when she knew she wasn't sure.

She had been hoping he'd break first, but then, standing next to him in the Astronomy Tower, she realized that it should've been her.

"I should be apologizing," she said, meeting his gaze. She bit the inside of her cheek as she thought about her next words. "I shouldn't have... What happened in the lake shouldn't have happened because I wasn't sure I wanted it to happen. I shouldn't have played with your feelings like that." She genuinely felt guilty. She had wanted to kiss him, but she wasn't sure if she should've done it.

"I'm sorry, Draco."

He inhaled deeply, thinking about her words for a long moment. It would be a lie straight through his teeth if he said he wasn't glad to hear her apology. Though he still felt a sense of guilt in his own mind, he knew that she would probably regret what happened while it was happening, yet he hadn't stopped it. He let his own yearning cloud his better judgment.

"I'm sorry, too, Olivia."

She offered him a small smile, and then her eyes found the sky that was going from a warm orangeness to a deeper pink and purpleness as it made its way to the midnight blue that haunted them every night. The awkward tension between them was slowly calming itself now that the apologies, no matter how vague and surface-level, swirled around in the chilly air.

"Yeah." Draco nodded as he prepared his words. "I think it's best if we remain just friends, anyway." Olivia's eyes darted to him. "Things would mostly get too messy if anything went further. And I am not saying that it would, just, you know." He faced her for a split, barely noticeable second before looking away.

"Right," she replied with a curt nod as she focused back on the sight in front of her. Her stomach suddenly ached. She agreed with his words completely, but she felt off about them at the same time. What was it about what he said that made her unsure?

Draco negeren en niet onder ogen zien wat er is gebeurd of wat je voelt, is niet hoe je dit moet aanpakken. Lucas's nagging words echoed in her skull, and she wanted to forget them completely. She was no longer ignoring Draco, but her feelings... No, she wasn't ignoring any feelings either. There were no feelings.

Lucas was wrong.

Draco let out another deep breath. "Well, I've got to go. Theodore and Blaise are wanting to do something. To be honest, I'm not really sure what they are planning." He let out a small laugh, sending her a knowing look.

She returned the smile and turned as she watched him walk towards the stairs. "Don't get into trouble," she told him, leaning her back against the railing.

He gave her one last look with a smirk before he turned and left.

That nagging pit in Olivia's stomach remained as she watched the blonde of his hair disappear. Lucas's voice still sounded in the back of her mind, and she wanted it to stop.

There were no feelings. They were just friends.

≀⋆⁺₊⋆ ꗃ 𖦹⨳✺

━━━━ ella's speaking !
this chapter was kinda of rush-write in some places bc i was struggling with it and putting down any words i could to get act three done... and what i mean by "struggling"  is that it literally took me from the 14th to the 31st of january to finish 😭 but it's finally here!

act three is practically done, just a few more chapters to finish, and then onto act four we go!! i'm so excited to write the next act bc i have a lot planned and this book starts to get really interesting 🤭

make sure to comment & vote !!

kisses.

━━━━━━━━━━ born to die,
© -LOSTGARDENS,          feb 2024

word count: 5278.   written: 1.31.24.   published: 2.1.24.