BORN TO DIE    ╱    DRACO MALFOY
꒷꒦ · ˚.‧ . written by ella . . . © -lostgardens
003 ━━━━━━━━━━━ ❛ first day ❜

The morning hour was early—hardly even considered morning—when Olivia woke. Four A.M. marked the clock on the wall, and she let out a sigh at the early hour. Her eyes glanced around her new and unfamiliar room. Pansy and Daphne were still sleeping. Must be nice.

The nightmare had haunted her mind again during the night, but this time it was different; it was more detailed. The man's face was still blank, but everything else seemed more defined; she could make out more things around the room, and the sadness and fear were stronger.

She sat on her bed, just thinking. Seeing how early it was, she didn't have to get ready for a while. Her mind raced despite her desperate attempts at slowing it. Hogwarts, her dream school, the place she had always wanted to go, her one escape from her parents—it all didn't seem worth it anymore. It wasn't the place she had hoped it to be, and she wished oh-so-hardly that once she got fully settled in, all would change.

Letting out another long breath, she got up from under the comforter that the school had provided for her, which she was definitely going to replace with a softer one. She set her stuffed bear, which she had snuck out of her trunk when she awoke, on her bed, then quietly grabbed her shower essentials from her trunk.

She creeped over to the bathroom, trying not to wake the other two girls, and closed the door behind her. Setting the bag on the counter, she took a deep breath, then walked over to the shower to turn on the water.

Her small hand ran under the water, feeling that it instantly heated to the perfect temperature (she gathered that was one of the perks of her attendance at a magical school). Then she took a step back.

Once she was out of her day-old uniform, she stepped into the shower. Her hair was washed with her rosemary-scented shampoo and conditioner, and her body with her ginger-scented body wash.

When she was out, she wrapped a towel around her small body and went back to her room to get dressed. Pansy and Daphne were still sleeping, and she was glad for it; she was not in the mood to fake a smile and make small talk.

She quickly dressed in a fresh uniform, this one paired with a Slytherin tie and a green-themed plaid skirt instead of the plain black she was previously wearing. Then she put on her shoes and her robe, which was embroidered with the Slytherin crest.

It felt real. It all felt real now that she was wearing her house's uniforms. She didn't know whether she liked that feeling or hated it. Or maybe it was somewhere in between? She didn't know.

Checking the time, she saw that only an hour had passed since she first woke. Taking a deep breath, she picked up her bag from the floor and walked over to her nightstand, where she grabbed her wand and the book that still had the piece of paper neatly tucked inside its pages.

She filled her enchanted bag with the things she would need for classes, set it on her bed, and tucked her wand into the small pocket hidden inside her robes.

She went back to the bathroom and brushed her teeth and hair, trying to make herself look a little more presentable so she could carry the reputation of the Mallard family name. Then she grabbed her bag and exited the room, ready to start her day and get it over with.

The common room is where she ended up. She was relieved that it was empty, given the bright hour. Making her way over to one of the couches, seeing as though she still had time to spare, she sat down, its black leather brushing against her legs, and she pulled her book from her bag.

And as she went to flip to the pages she put the paper between, someone's voice rang in her ears. "Why are you awake so early?" the person asked. It was Malfoy's voice that she recognized.

It was definitely Malfoy's voice—annoying, whiny, and infuriating. She quickly turned around, and when her gaze fell on him and his perfectly gelled-back hair, her suspicions were confirmed. She rolled her eyes and faced forward again, her gaze landing on the fireplace that was devoid of flames.

"Why are you awake so early?" she retorted, a mocking tone inhabiting her voice.

He didn't answer; he just sat next to her, looking at the absent flames as well.

They were silent; the common room was silent. It was kind of peaceful and nice. But she also didn't like it. Nothing involving Draco Malfoy should ever be peaceful and nice—not even a little bit. She didn't dare to look at him, but she could feel his eyes on her. And she fought the urge to turn to him and ask what he was looking at.

"Do you hate me?" Malfoy asked abruptly, breaking the silence.

She took a breath. "If you have to ask, then you should know the answer," she replied, her face blank of any emotion. He just had to ruin it, didn't he? She stood, grabbing her things, then left without another word. She didn't know where she was going, but she was going somewhere where he wasn't.

≀⋆⁺₊⋆ ꗃ 𖦹⨳✺

It was time for breakfast when Olivia entered the Great Hall. There were many students talking and laughing with their friends while they ate, and there were many that were doing the opposite. She didn't pay them any mind, and they did the same with her.

Too much happiness made her sick, so ignoring it was the best option.

She walked over to the Slytherin table, pulling the strap of her bag more securely onto her shoulder. Pansy and Daphne smiled at her as she got closer to the table. She didn't return the gesture.

And when she stopped in front of them, she saw that they were sitting alongside Malfoy, Blaise, Theodore, Crabbe, and Goyle. The boys were all stuffing their faces with food like a swarm of ravished animals, causing her face to slightly twist in disgust.

She sat down next to Theodore, pushing her hair behind her shoulders and out of her face, then set her bag beside her on the bench. She muttered small greetings to everyone as she began to fill her plate.

They returned the greetings, and then Theodore and Blaise began talking about what seemed to be the same subject as the day before—nonsense.

Except for Theodore and Blaise's rambling, breakfast was quiet among the group. No one could say the same for the students chatting and catching up around them.

Olivia searched the Great Hall once she was done eating, and her eyes landed on Snape, who was standing at the end of the long table with a stack of paper. She supposed that he must be handing out the Slytherin timetables. Perfect.

She watched as the emotionless man handed out the schedules to each student, slowly but surely making his way over to the group.

"Hello, Severus," she said, looking up at the professor with a fake smile.

He stood in front of her on the opposite side of the table, his eyes slightly narrowing at her as everyone met her with wide eyes, confused as to why she was calling him by his first name. "You may address me as Professor Snape, Snape, or sir, Miss Mallard, not Severus," he explained as he handed her the timetable.

"Right," she replied, her brows furrowing in fake understanding as she nodded. "Sorry, Professor."

The silence returned as he handed the others' their timetables and then walked away with one last narrow-eyed glance at Olivia.

The group quickly faced the Mallard girl with shocked looks, but she ignored them. And after a second of them staring her down, they looked away, realizing she wasn't going to acknowledge them, and began studying their timetables.

All of them told each other the classes they had and when they had them, and as it turned out, they all had the same classes at the same times. How odd.

Transfiguration was their first stop. And that's where they were heading as their shoes carried them down the corridor, weaving their way through the students they passed by. Olivia was in front, while the others followed.

Once they reached the classroom, they walked in, seeing other first-year students in their seats. On the desk at the front of the class sat a silver-coated tabby cat. Olivia immediately knew that was McGonagall in her animagus form, seeing how alert the cat seemed to be, looking around the classroom at the students—and it helped that she loved to read up on the wizards of the wizarding world, so she knew the professor's animagus.

They took their seats. Olivia sat with Pansy, Theodore sat with Blaise, Malfoy sat with Daphne, and Crabbe and Goyle sat together.

Each student pulled out their books and what they would need after the bell rang, signaling classes were about to start. Suddenly, the door burst open, causing some students to look back at the commotion. In ran a panicked Ronald Weasley and Harry Potter.

Olivia's eyes caught the boys as they walked to the front, going to an empty set of seats. "Whew, we made it," Ron began, clutching his books in his arms as he looked at Harry. "Can you imagine the look on ole' McGonagall's face if we were late?"

Olivia rolled her eyes at his words as McGonagall, in her cat form, jumped off the desk, transformed back into her human self, and stepped in front of the boys with a distasteful look on her face.

The boys' eyes lit up at the sight.

"That was bloody brilliant," Ron beamed, his brows raised in surprise and a small smile fighting its way onto his face.

McGonagall's aged hands came together in front of her. "Thank you for that assessment, Mr. Weasley," she began, her slightly shaky voice lacing with disappointment. "Perhaps if I were to transfigure Mr. Potter and yourself into a pocket watch, that way one of you might be on time," she retorted.

"We got lost," Harry sheepishly responded.

"Then perhaps a map?" she questioned them. "I trust you don't need one to find your seats," she added, eyeing the empty seats in front of them through her oval-shaped glasses.

The two boys shook their heads as she walked away, leaving them to sit down. She went to the front of the classroom, and class began.

≀⋆⁺₊⋆ ꗃ 𖦹⨳✺

It was later, in Snape's class, and Olivia sat with Pansy again. The steaming cauldrons were all around them. Professor Snape was nowhere in sight. Many of the students were chatting, waiting for class to start, including Pansy and Olivia, which was rare for the Mallard girl.

As it turns out, Pansy wasn't as bad as Olivia thought she was going to be. The Parkinson girl had explained that she was glad for Olivia's acceptance of her friendship, seeing as though she had heard a lot about her and thought she was somewhat cool.

Of course, Olivia took this to heart; she always loved when people complimented her.

Snape then barged into the room, causing everyone to face him. He walked without making eye contact with anyone as his long robe flowed behind him, leaving a trail of his steps. He carried himself to the front, just before he turned around to face the students as the door slammed shut.

Olivia fought the urge to roll her eyes at his dramatics and watched as he looked at each face staring at him with fear—well, besides her.

"There will be no foolish wand-waving or silly incantations in this class," he began, stopping at the front of the classroom. "As such, I don't expect many of you to appreciate the subtle silence and exact art that is potion making."

The silence in the room was so intense that you could hear a pin drop.

"However, for those select few..." his eyes shifted, looking behind Olivia, and her eyes followed him, and she saw Malfoy with a small smile on his face, "who possess the predisposition, I can teach you how to bewitch the mind and ensnare the senses."

Olivia's gaze made its way back to the professor in front of her, listening to his words. She knew he despised his position as the Potions Master. His passion has always been Defense Against the Dark Arts. But for someone who disliked their job, he sure did not do a good job of hiding it—or at least that's what she thought.

He continued, "I can tell you how to battle fame, brew glory, even put a stopper... in death." Snape's attention was clearly drawn to something. Olivia furrowed her brows, looking around the room, trying to find what he was staring at.

But, as it turned out, it was a who, not a what. There sat Harry Potter, writing down all of the information that was being given to him. But, in Snape's eyes, there sat Harry Potter, writing and not paying attention.

"Then again, maybe some of you have come to Hogwarts in possession of abilities so formidable that you feel confident enough to not... pay attention," he said, glaring holes into the top of Potter's head. When the boy finally looked at Snape, he saw him staring at him in boredom. "Mr. Potter, our... new celebrity." He paused. "Tell me, what would I get if I added the Root of Asphodel to an infusion of Wormwood?"

The Draught of Living Death, Olivia answered in her head.

Olivia watched as the girl she believed to be named Hermione Granger raised her hand, very anxious to answer the question, which was apparent with the way she was stretching her arm. The Mallard girl also knew the answer, but she knew what Snape was doing, and she was not going to dare mess with his plan.

Potter shrugged, looking at Snape through his round, thin-framed glasses.

"You don't know?" Snape asked. "Well, let's try again." He paused. "Where, Mr. Potter, would you look if I asked you to find me a Bezoar?"

The stomach of a goat

"I don't know, sir," Harry said.

"And what's the difference between Monkshood and Wolfsbane?"

There's no difference; they're the same plant, also called Aconite.

Olivia watched as Granger's hand stayed in the air, still very eager to answer the questions, as it waved around, trying to get the professor's attention. But still, Snape kept his focus on Harry as the boy repeated, "I don't know, sir."

"Pity... clearly, fame isn't everything," the man muttered, his voice monotone. "Is it, Mr. Potter?" He continued to stand at the front of the classroom for everyone to see him.

"Clearly, Hermione knows," Harry retorted, his voice dripping with annoyance as he glared at Snape. "Seems a pity not to ask her," he added.

A few students around them laughed quietly as Olivia raised her brows in surprise. A small smirk creeped its way onto her face, but she quickly wiped it away as she stared at the bushy-haired girl, who still had her hand raised high in the air.

"Silence!" Snape called out, turning to face Potter. Then he walked over to the boy's table, where he sat with Granger. "And put your hand down, you silly girl," he told the girl in his signature tone. She listened to him as he sat down in front of the glasses-wearing boy, leaning a bit closer to him.

"For your information, Potter—Asphodel and Wormwood make a sleeping potion so powerful, it is known as the Draught of Living Death," he began. "A Bezoar is a stone taken from the stomach of a goat, and it will save you from most poisons," he continued as everyone around the room looked at him with either fear or admiration, while Olivia rolled her eyes and Harry glared at him. "As for Monkshood and Wolfsbane, they are the same plant, which also goes by the name of Aconite."

Everything was silent. No one dared to make a peep. "Well?" Snape asked, looking at all of the students. "Why aren't you all copying this down?" Everyone around began to scurry, grabbing their parchment, quill, and ink and copying down the man's words.

Olivia didn't, though, seeing as there wasn't a point in her doing so. Snape got up from his seat in front of Potter and began walking back to his desk. He passed her in the process and studied her as she sat looking as bored as ever, no quill, ink, or parchment in sight. "Miss Mallard, why aren't you copying down the information?"

She sighed, looking at him with her light—and tired—eyes. "Because I know all of this information," she answered, a sigh falling from her lips. "Honestly, it's bloody stupid that I'm taking this class in the first place; I already know everything we'll learn this year," she added. "Actually, I probably know everything we'll learn up until my third year," she lightly laughed.

He blinked at her, not finding what she was trying to make a joke about funny. "Well, that's a wonderful thought, Miss Mallard, but you still need to copy down the information—actually make an effort, or I will have to inform your parents," he deadpanned, then walked away.

She huffed, her smile immediately gone from her face as she pulled out her things.

Snape sat down at his desk, picking up his own quill and dipping it in ink. "And Gryffindors, note that five points will be taken from your house for your classmate's cheek." He began writing as Olivia glared at him through her thick eyelashes.

Olivia felt Pansy nudging her, causing her to face the girl, watching as she gestured to the paper. "Keep writing; I don't want to lose house points too," Pansy whispered, then turned back to her own paper.

≀⋆⁺₊⋆ ꗃ 𖦹⨳✺

It was lunchtime, and Olivia was sitting in the Great Hall with the group of Slytherins. She was eating her food as everyone around her talked. She felt Malfoy's eyes continuously on her, but she ignored him and paid attention to Pansy and Daphne, who were discussing boys they thought were cute.

And when they turned to Olivia, she looked at them with curiosity as they did the same to her. "So, Olivia, is there anyone you think is cute?" Pansy asked with a very unsettling smirk on her face, wiggling her brows. The boys immediately stopped their conversation when they heard this question and looked at the girl.

Olivia furrowed her brows as she thought, glancing at the boys. "Um, actually," she began. But before she could finish, a swarm of owls flew into the Great Hall, interrupting her. She looked up, watching the birds fly around. "The mail is here," she said, pointing to the owls.

Her gaze caught on her family's owl. It seemed to be carrying two letters: one was presumably from Lucas, which meant the other was either from her father or her mother, and she was betting on the latter.

The letters dropped in front of her, and she stared down at them. Her family's owl, Dusk, a black screech owl with white spots, flew down to the table, causing a few students to scoot away. Olivia picked up a piece of roasted chicken and fed it to her, then she flew away, leaving the Great Hall.

Olivia looked between the two sealed and folded pieces of parchment. Though both had her family crest stamped into the wax seal, she could tell which one was from Lucas. He signed the letter with a small circle in the corner.

She picked it up from the table as she felt eyes on her. She was the only one of the group to receive mail, so they must've been curious to know what she got. Ignoring their creeping nosiness, she peeled open the first letter, seeing Lucas's neat handwriting.

Dear Livvy,

          How is it? How's Hogwarts? Is it as amazing as we dreamed? Or wait, is it even better?

          I miss you dearly, even though it's only been one night and half a day.

          Mother and father are being cruel as usual, but I can handle it; no need to worry. But I do deeply miss our late-night conversations and how we would watch the stars, with you telling me every single one you recognized.

          I hope you are having fun and making friends. I can't wait to come to Hogwarts next year and be in Slytherin with you. And I want to meet them too—your friends, that is.

          The house feels empty without you. I love you, and I miss you. And I can't wait for you to come home during the winter break.

          I hope to hear from you soon.

Love, your brother, Lucas

Olivia's heart ached at his words. She hated to admit it, but she had been so caught up with the wonders of Hogwarts during the one night and half a day that she hadn't even had the time to think about him and how he was doing without her by his side.

She felt tears prickling in her eyes, thinking about how her parents were treating him, but she swallowed, determined not to cry in front of everyone. Don't be weak.

She folded her brother's letter back up and then picked up the other, putting Lucas' in its place on the table. She peeled it open, just as she did the first, and then began reading, her mother's perfect handwriting consuming her sight.

Dear daughter,

          I've gotten word on how you acted during the proceedings of your sorting ceremony. I would congratulate you on getting Slytherin, but I'm too highly disappointed in your behavior to do so.

          Your father and I have spoken to Severus, and he has agreed to keep an eye on you, so you better listen to what he tells you. If not, then there will be consequences. He is the one who told us about your little stunt, how you made a fool of yourself, and how your magic was out of control.

          Don't let it happen again. Remember, don't be weak, and don't show fear.

          That's all for now.

Sincerely, your mother

Olivia grew angry as she read the words. The threatening tears from before are gone as fast as they came. Her eyes carried over to Snape, who sat at the professors' table, eating his food.

She stood up from the table, clutching the letter in her hand. She grabbed Lucas' from the table, shoving it in her bag as she began walking from the table without another word. Her eyes were dead set on Snape and all of his long, black hair.

Up the steps she went. Her shoes carried her over to him at the end of the table. She didn't care about the looks she was receiving from the professors, including Dumbledore. She walked over to Snape, slamming the piece of parchment on the table in front of him.

He looked at the paper that her small hand pressed down into the wood, then his eyes slowly went to her angry face. He looked at her as if her presence were the most boring thing in the universe, like it didn't matter to him at all. "Can I help you, Miss Mallard?" he asked, his tone flat.

"Yes, you can, Professor," she spat, catching the attention of most everyone in the Great Hall. "I would like to know the meaning of you telling my business to my parents," she continued, fuming with anger.

"Miss Mallard, we can talk about this another time," he said in a low tone.

"No, we can talk about it now," she demanded.

"Young lady, that is no way to speak to a professor," McGonagall said, coming up behind Snape.

Olivia glared at her with a look that could kill as Dumbledore joined the old woman. "Is there a problem here, Severus?" Dumbledore asked.

"No, sir," Snape replied, not glancing at the man. "I can handle this myself," he added, standing from his seat. He grabbed Olivia's arm and began dragging her away from the table.

"What are you doing?" she asked, struggling to get out of his grip with the letter clutched in her hand. "Let go of me," she muttered, continuing to struggle. But he didn't budge.

And when she grabbed his arm with her free hand, her skin felt as if it was burning. She winced and quickly pulled her hand away as he came to a stop, glaring down at her.

They stood in the middle of the hall. Olivia looked at Snape with confusion and anger, and he met her stare with annoyance. Everyone's gaze was drawn to them. The confusion of the interaction filled their expressions.

After a moment of glaring at the professor, she looked at her hand, examining it to make sure it wasn't hurt. She gasped. Her veins were black. But she blinked, and the sight was gone. Her eyes must have been playing tricks on her. But she could've sworn.

She looked up at Snape, who was staring at her hand with utter confusion, and then his eyes made their way to hers. Then she watched as he looked up, focusing on someone behind her.

It was silent in the Great Hall as she followed his line of sight, her eyes landing on Dumbledore, who still stood at the professors' table. He looked as if he were speaking to Snape through his eyes. Then, suddenly, Olivia felt Snape pulling her towards the Great Hall doors once more. This time, she wasn't fighting him.

Once they were out and far enough away from the crowded hall, Snape let go of her arm and faced her. There was fury in her eyes as she looked at him. Olivia took the crumbled letter that was in her hand and shoved it in her bag, alongside the other.

"What do you think you are doing by confronting me like that?" he asked, a bit frustrated. If anything, Olivia might've guessed that he was angry, and for good reason, though she would never admit that.

"What do you think you are doing by telling my business when it is not your place to do so?" she retorted, crossing her arms in front of her.

"Your parents wanted me to look out for you, and the way you were acting was going to get you in trouble," he said. "Your magic is out of control, Olivia," he continued. "Get it in check, and I'll back off," he added, his bored demeanor back in place.

Olivia hated to admit it, but he was right—but, of course, she wasn't going to say that. "My parents don't want you 'looking out for me', they want you to control me and my actions." Her eyes narrowed at him, and her arms were still crossed over her chest. "And my magic is perfectly under control—I just got a little angry with the sorting hat's words, that's all." She wasn't glaring at him or yelling at him anymore, but she was still angry.

"You can't listen to anything that old thing says; it's made to get into your head—it's going to say things you don't like, but it's nothing you haven't thought of yourself," he told her.

"It's still bloody annoying." She stomped her foot. "It called me a monster," she informed him, missing his flinching at the words. "It said I was like my mother," she added, adding those words with even more disgust than her previous ones.

"Stop it; you're acting like a child."

"I am a child," she muttered, stomping her foot once again.

That was when the bell rang, causing them to look around the corridor as if someone was going to pop out of the shadows and send the killing curse their way. "Get to class," the professor instructed. "And no more acting out, Olivia—I mean it."

"Whatever." She rolled her eyes, walking away from the man.

≀⋆⁺₊⋆ ꗃ 𖦹⨳✺

━━━━ ella's speaking !
so i rewrote this so long ago, but i didn't edit it until today 😭

this is really bad and a lot shorter than i wanted it to be, but it's the best i could do rn

i hope you enjoyed !!

kisses.

━━━━━━━━━━ born to die,
© -LOSTGARDENS,      august 2023

word count: 4776. written: 6.30.23. published: 8.21.23.