BORN TO DIE    ╱    DRACO MALFOY
꒷꒦ · ˚.‧ . written by ella . . . © -lostgardens
079 ━━━━ ❛ need to know everything ❜

Olivia had been losing her mind ever since the summer started a mere month and a half ago. She could sleep without being reminded of her recurring nightmare or the newly developed one—the one about Cedric and the graveyard. However, the latter had been the one haunting her more recently. She'd been trying to bury her guilt and tell herself that his death wasn't her fault, but the nightmare wasn't helping her believe herself. And that was exactly what it should've been doing, because, truth be told, it was her fault. Cedric was dead because of her. She'd moved out of the way and dodged the curse that was meant for her, and it hit him. He died because she was selfish and didn't want to feel the weakening effects of the curse again—the ones that she had been through before.

But that wasn't what happened for Cedric. He had died. She could've handled it; she survived once before, and she could've done it again. But him? He had died, and it was all her fault. She was selfish. She was just as everyone thought she was.

A murderer.

The Daily Prophet, Rita Skeeter in particular, the woman Olivia despised with everything in her, had been reporting on the talk of the town as of late and the words from their dear Minister Fudge. And that was the fact that most everyone believed Olivia had killed Cedric and that Harry and her were lying about it by saying that Voldemort was back, that they were sinister, and that they were the real villains of their world.

Everyone despised her yet again. Well, not everyone...

Perhaps part of that was true. Perhaps Olivia was a murderer. Though she didn't actually send the curse Cedric's way, that was all Peter Pettigrew's doing; she was the one that it had been meant for. She had moved out of the way, and he had died because of it. But Voldemort was back. They were not lying about that. And even if she had murdered Cedric with her own hands, Harry would not have gone along with it, as everyone was speculating. The boy had too much honor.

Another feat Olivia had been trying to face on top of everything was her mother and father being around more. They were everywhere. Every time she turned, one of them was where she looked. Most people would love having their parents around more often, having dinner with them every night, and actually somewhat getting along with them after not having a good relationship for most of their lives, but it was driving her mad. Her parents, mostly her mother, were breathing down her neck, watching her every move, and going with her anytime she left the manor to go to Hogsmeade or Diagon Alley. It was all so frustrating and irritating.

She just wanted to be left alone.

Thankfully, as she and Lucas sat in the sitting room next to the study, with her reading and him sketching, their parents were nowhere in sight. They knew exactly where they were, though. They were in the study, talking about their secretive things and work-related topics that they would never share with their children.

It was quiet in the manor, peaceful, and Olivia had almost forgotten that they were even there in the first place. Almost. It had felt like how it used to whenever they were gone all the time on business trips, but it wasn't. She knew that. Especially when the door of the study opened.

Olivia didn't look up from her book, not wanting to make eye contact with whichever parent was standing in the doorway, staring at her. Perhaps if she was still enough, they wouldn't see her. She was aware her thought was too good to be true, but one could still hope, could they not? She just focused harder on the words on the page, while Lucas did the same with his drawing, both of them having the same idea.

"Olivia," their mother's voice rang in their ears, but neither looked up. "Can you come in here for a moment?"

This caught both of them off guard. They were never called into the study. The only time Olivia could remember being summoned there was that one time right before her third year, when she and her mother were silently arguing and her parents warned her about Sirius Black having escaped Azkaban and that he might be after Harry. They all knew how that ended.

Olivia didn't look up, so her mother's voice turned just a tad sterner. "Olivia."

It took another moment of Olivia ignoring her before she finally looked up from her book, snapping it shut with a sigh. "Yes, mother?" she asked boredly, as if she had not heard the woman's request.

Clodagh's eyes slightly narrowed at the girl, showing that she didn't find amusement in her little act. "Could you join me and your father in here for a moment?" she asked again. "We need to discuss something important."

That was when Olivia knew that the "something important" was the events of her fourth year at Hogwarts. To her surprise, her parents, despite being around all the time, didn't take it out of their day to question her or make it seem as if they wanted to question her about everything. But she knew they would eventually. And that eventually was now.

She sent a look to her brother as she stood up from the couch, to which he replied with furrowed brows. She set her book down in her spot and focused on her mother, only seeing the back of the woman's head as she reentered the study. Olivia crossed the room, pushing open the door further as she stepped inside. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a figure, and so she looked over quickly, finding her mother standing right next to the door with her hands clasped together and rested against her front. Olivia gave her a curious gaze, wondering why she was just standing there like she was trying to get the better of her, like she was going to attack from behind.

She honestly would not put it past her.

As soon as she was fully in the room and out of the way of the door, her mother shut it, keeping their conversation from Lucas's ears. Olivia didn't know why; Lucas already knew everything—him being the only one she could be open and honest about her feelings to in this house. Well, Bobbin and Trinky as well. However, if she told them about her guilt and nightmares, and then her mother questioned them about it, they would be forced to tell her. And she didn't want the woman to know anything she felt. It wasn't her business after all.

Olivia moved over to the chair that sat in front of the desk as her mother went to the one beside the desk and against the wall. It was just like when she'd been in there before. It was almost eerie. Her eyes found her father's, seeing him leaning his arms on his desk with his hands clasped on top of it. "Olivia, we've brought you in here because we would like to know everything that happened that night," he explained, not needing to tell her which night he was referring to.

The chills that crept down her spine at the reminder, though she'd already somewhat explained it all to Lucas, caused her to shiver. Then she let out a sigh, glancing between her parents, who were focused on her. She cleared her throat, sitting up straight, before she began explaining everything—from entering the maze to Krum being bewitched and the hallucinations she had (she left out seeing her mother). She could've sworn she saw surprise from her mother when she mentioned her boggart. Then she moved on to when she, Potter, and Cedric all made it to the cup and agreed to win together—after some convincing from the boys—and how the cup was a Portkey and how they ended up in the graveyard. She then explained what happened in the graveyard, from Pettigrew killing Cedric to her running and hiding (which she was shocked she didn't get scolded for) to Potter facing Voldemort and Peter finding her. Then she talked about how Voldemort and Potter battled, how the boy's wand connected with their enemy's, and how the spirits of Voldemort's most recent victims helped Harry fight against the dark wizard. Then Harry saved her, and they took Cedric's body back to Hogwarts.

Her parents sat and listened to the whole thing, not interrupting her once as she held back her emotions, like she was just an Auror reporting to their superior. Once she was done, her father said, "All right, thank you, Olivia. That's all; you can go now."

She didn't fight him on this and stood from her seat, turning to go to the door. But before she could get too far, her mother said her name, causing her to stop in her tracks and roll her eyes at the interruption of her escape. She turned around to face her after a moment, seeing the woman standing beside the desk now. Olivia raised her brows. "Yes, mother?"

Clodagh took another step closer, coming to the corner of the desk before she rested on it, half-leaning, half-sitting. Her hands were still holding each other and rested in her lap as she stared at her daughter curiously. "You've seemed to have grown rather close to the Malfoy boy, have you not?" she asked, raising her brows. It was a question, but she sounded as if she already knew the answer.

"I suppose," Olivia replied, crossing her arms over her chest and trying to act as carelessly as she could. She tried not to think about the secret letters that they'd been sending back and forth since coming home from Hogwarts.

"This friendship," Clodagh continued, "will my disapproval do anything to get you to stay away from him? Or what you've learned about his father, perhaps?"

"No, it won't, Mother, because I don't care about your disapproval," she countered with a smirk on her face. Then her face fell more flat as she took a step forward, narrowing her eyes. "And as I've said many times, Draco is not his father, as I am not you."

"Does he feel this way too about his parents' disapproval of you?" Her mother continued as if her daughter's harsh words did not mean a thing to her.

Olivia straightened her spine. She wasn't completely sure. She knew Draco felt something for her, but she wasn't entirely sure those feelings were enough to make him go against his parents' wishes. She hoped they were. "He's getting there," she assured, lifting her chin just the slightest.

"Well." Clodagh looked down at the ground, placing her hands on either side of her and atop the woodtop of the desk, and she pushed herself up from where she was sitting. She caught Olivia's gaze as she moved about a foot closer to her. "When he breaks your heart, don't come crying to me about it," she told her daughter with coldness in her tone.

"I would never let him or anyone else break my heart," Olivia retorted, almost sneering at the thought. "And even if he did, trust me when I say that I would never come to you about it, Mother," she added, looking the woman up and down with disgust. Then she whipped around, pulling open the door, and exited the room, closing the door behind her a little harder than necessary.

Lucas looked up from his sketchbook, focusing on Olivia and seeing her anger. "What happened?" he asked curiously, dropping his book down and on his lap as his sister found his gaze.

Their mother had some nerves about her; that's what happened.

≀⋆⁺₊⋆ ꗃ 𖦹⨳✺

Later that evening, Olivia, Lucas, and their parents sat at the dining table, eating dinner. Olivia picked at her food, pushing it around with her fork. The table was silently awkward, since she and her mother were having a little silent spat again, and Lucas and Andrew just sat there, enduring it and not wanting to get in the middle.

"There's going to be a ball soon, next Saturday evening," Clodagh announced plainly, looking around the table. "We're all expected to attend." Her eyes focused on Olivia, letting the words sink into her daughter's mind.

Olivia looked up from her plate just as she stabbed a potato with her fork. "Do you think that's wise? Me going when everyone thinks I'm some sort of murderer?" She raised her brows, staring at her mother through her lashes.

"Since when have you paid mind to anything anyone says?" Clodagh asked. "Besides, you're not a murderer... that we know of," she whispered the last part under breath before raising her voice back to its original volume, "so it should not matter what they say. It's all lies; nothing we and you haven't faced before."

"What if I said that I didn't want to go?" Olivia countered, lifting her brows.

"And what if I said that your little friends would be there?" Her mother retorted, raising her own brows. She knew that would get the girl's attention, and it did, but Olivia didn't say anything. "We'll go shopping for your dress tomorrow. I expect you to be awake early," she told her.

Olivia rolled her eyes, focusing on her plate again. "Whatever."

Dress shopping was exactly what they did the next morning. Olivia woke up early anyway due to her nightmare. And then she and her mother left the manor for Diagon Alley before they even ate breakfast, much to Olivia's demise. Her stomach was growling from hunger, but she was also good enough to sacrifice her breakfast to get this over with. Because the sooner this was done, the sooner she could get away from her mother's presence.

They made their way through the streets of the familiar place, going straight to the boutique that they'd gotten all of Olivia's dresses for balls from, and Olivia was sure her mother got her Yule Ball dress from there as well. The bell rang as they entered through the door. They walked right up to the counter, coming face-to-face with the witch who owned the shop.

"Hi, we would like to see all of the pink ball gowns you have," Clodagh requested, causing Olivia's head to snap towards her as soon as she heard the word "pink."

"All right," the woman replied.

Olivia took a step forward, putting a smile on her face. "Actually," she caught the witch's attention, "we would like to see the black ball gowns you have. Thank you."

The witch glanced over the girl's head and at the woman standing behind her, then met Olivia's gaze again, nodding with a smile. Then she walked away, presumably to gather the dresses they asked for.

Olivia's smile instantly fell, and she glanced over her shoulder, shaking her head at her mother's nerves. "Pink," she muttered under breath with a roll of her eyes, not believing her mother, being who she was, would even think to suggest that, unless she was doing it to get on her nerves. It must've been that because Clodagh wouldn't be caught dead in pink just as much as Olivia wouldn't. Neither hated the color; it was quite beautiful; it just wasn't something they'd wear.

After that, the lady brought out the dresses for Olivia to try on, which she did. One by one, she put on a dress, showed her mother per her request, and got her unwanted opinion on each and every one of them. But finally, she settled on a dress. Her mother paid for it, and then they turned to the door, with her mother having the dress in a garment bag draped over her arm, preparing to leave.

"My friend Pansy really adored the dress you chose for the Yule Ball," Olivia admitted as they walked towards the entrance. She didn't know why she said it, but she did. It was better than the awkward and tense silence between them. If her mother was going to be around, she might as well try to be as civil as possible. At least while she was still home for the summer.

Clodagh stopped as they came to the door and looked over at her with a little hint of surprise in her eyes upon hearing this. "You actually wore it?"

Olivia nodded, not meeting her gaze. "Yes." A second of silence passed, and then she met her mother's stare and added, "But don't think it's because you chose it." Her tone was to assure her. She faced forward again, lifting her chin, as her mother pulled open the door. "I simply had nothing else to wear."

Though Olivia didn't see it and it wasn't on the woman's face long, a slight smile of pride turned at the corners of Clodagh's mouth for a second before she wiped it away, making her expression emotionless and cold, and they walked outside. And just as she and Olivia turned and began walking down the street, they came face-to-face with the last two people they were expecting to see that day. And based on the look on their faces, they hadn't expected to see them either.

Narcissa and Draco stood in front of them with surprise apparent in their expressions. The woman was opposite Clodagh, and Draco was opposite Olivia. Olivia's eyes looked over the boy she'd been sending letters back and forth to since the summer started, seeing that he was wearing that black suit and shiny oxfords. It put a small smirk on her face.

"Hello, Draco," Olivia said, looking up at the boy as her smirk deepened. He seemed to have gotten taller since the last time she'd seen him, but so had she—by only an inch, but still.

"Olivia." He tipped his head, smirking.

The two of them stood there for a moment, just staring at each other, not even realizing that next to them their mothers were doing the same thing—just two completely different types of expressions. Then Clodagh lightly cleared her throat, snapping her attention from the Malfoy woman, and turned to her daughter. Her hand found Olivia's arm, causing the girl to look at the contact in confusion before she looked up at her mother with the same gaze.

"Come find me when you're done," she told Olivia.

Her words made Olivia's confusion triple as the hand was dropped from her arm and her mother moved forward. What was this? Was her mother actually allowing her to speak with Draco?

Draco and Narcissa both stepped aside, allowing her room to go between them, and Clodagh did somewhat awkwardly. She gave Draco an analyzing look, up and down, before she turned to the side and brushed in between him and his mother. And then she walked away as Olivia and Narcissa watched her, both for very different reasons.

After a moment, Olivia refocused on the boy in front of her, taking him in once more. She took a step forward, with the smirk now returning to her face. She grabbed the lapels of his suit, pulling them slightly forward before she ran her hands over them to smooth them out. Draco watched her do this before looking up and focusing on her gaze through his lashes. "You're wearing the suit."

Draco leaned closer just slightly and teasingly said, "Just for you."

Olivia shook her head in amusement, playfully rolling her eyes.

Beside them, Narcissa's face twisted in discomfort, and then she softly said, "Draco." The boy looked over at her as Olivia did the same. Her eyes danced between them before finally landing on her son. "I'll be over there when you're finished," she informed him, nodding to the end of the street, perhaps to the shop that they'd been heading to when they ran into Olivia and Clodagh. And then she walked away without saying another word.

Olivia and Draco's eyes found each other again, both of them with small smiles on their faces. Olivia didn't know why he made her feel so giddy, like a little child getting a pet or candy from their favorite candy shop—so how she was when she got Tommy and Theodore any time they went into Honeydukes. It was all so confusing, but it also felt right.

He felt right.

"I should probably be going," she told him, her voice a little quieter. She didn't want to go, but she needed to. Her mother would only give her so much time before she went on a rampage and turned the world upside down because her daughter was talking to a Malfoy. "See you at the ball, Draco." She then stood on her tip-toes, placing a kiss on his cheek. Then she brushed past him, starting to walk away, but a thought crossed her mind before she could get too far. Turning around, she said, "Draco?" And he looked at her. "Wear the suit to the ball for me, will you?" She smirked, then faced forward again and walked away, feeling so much better than she had for the past month and a half.

What was he doing to her?

≀⋆⁺₊⋆ ꗃ 𖦹⨳✺

━━━━ ella's speaking !
narcissa and clodagh in the last scene: 🧍🏻‍♀️🧍🏻‍♀️

i don't have much to say besides the fact that the next chapter is the last of act four and i've already written the first chapter of act five!! and i really hope you enjoyed this chapter!

make sure to comment and vote 🫶🏻

kisses.

━━━━━━━━━━ born to die,
© -LOSTGARDENS,        may 2024

word count: 3557. written: 5.3-4.24. published: 5.28.34.