10: Failin' In My Sleep
AFTER A tour of the settlement, Maria took the girls back to a spare house, where they could shower, eat, and get cleaned up. Jane hadn't taken a hot shower since she was little, so she enjoyed the few minutes of the hot water trickling down her body. She stood in the silence of her ears, as she felt a strange sense of comfort. She trusted Ellie, who sat in the bedroom next door- Jane trusted someone.
Jane walked out of the shower with a white towel wrapped around her slim body, her wet curls dripping on her shoulders. Ellie stood in front of her, wearing a pink gown, grimacing at the clothes placed on the bed. Jane put in her hearing aid, tuning into Ellie's complaints.
"Look at this shit." Ellie exclaimed in disgust, as she held up a purple jacket placed on the bed.
Jane smiled, "I think it's nice."
Ellie scoffed, whilst Jane picked up her new clothes, which was an off-white long sleeved t-shirt and denim dungarees. Jane's eyes darted around the room, looking for her jacket which contained the drawing of her mom inside. She panicked, Ellie immediately noticing,
"You alright?"
Jane nodded quickly, before looking at Ellie, who was fiddling with a small cup in her hands. "What's that?" Jane questioned curiously.
Ellie read the instructions it came with, "A diva cup." She folded the cup in half, as Ellie chuckled at the popping sound it made when it unfolded.
Jane smirked, "Gross."
Ellie hesitated, as she picked up her clothes, "Can you, uh, turn around?"
"Oh, yeah, sorry." Jane replied quickly, as she turned around.
After they got changed, Jane and Ellie made their way to Maria's house, which was only opposite them. Ellie walked inside first, as they both looked around. Jane joined Ellie in the living room, as they both looked at the memorial frames containing the words 'Sarah' and 'Kevin'. The two candles in front of them had melted, leaving only a stump of wax left.
Suddenly, the door opened at Maria walked inside, "Oh, good. Just traded for this. Go ahead, try it on."
Maria passed Ellie a purple coat, as she scoffed, "It's, uh, super fucking purple."
Jane blurted out, "Where's my clothes?"
"The rag pile." Maria explained calmly, "Oh, Jane, I found this in your pocket." She handed the girl the folded up picture, "Did you draw it yourself? It's beautiful. Who is she?"
"My mom." Jane muttered, as she put it in her pocket.
Ellie frowned in confusion, "I thought-"
"It's what I think she would've looked like." Jane continued, as she looked to her feet uncomfortably.
"Well, I'm sure she'd love it." Maria clasped her hands, signifying the ending of that conversation. The women asked, "Who's been cutting your hair, Ellie?"
"Uh, world-class salons." The girl replied sarcastically, as Maria walked to the kitchen, "Wait, whoa, no-"
"A trim." Maria interrupted, "That's all. Just the ends. I promise."
Jane sat down at the kitchen table opposite Ellie, who was having her hair cut by Maria. Ellie questioned, "So, was this like your job back then?"
"No, I was an Assistant District Attorney out of Omaha Nebraska." Maria explained, though the two girls stared blankly. She corrected herself, "I put bad guys in jail."
Jane nodded, "Oh, cool."
"I've always liked doing hair, though. Maybe it's a mom thing." Maria continued, "You two were looking at the little memorial Tommy made?"
Ellie hesitated, "Yeah, uh, I'm sorry about your kids."
"It's okay." Maria nodded, "And kid. Just Kevin. Sarah was Joel's daughter."
Jane looked at the oak table, avoiding eye contact with the two people in front of her. She picked the skin of her fingers under the table, finally having the bravery to look back at Maria. Jane felt guilty, though she knew it wasn't her fault.
Maria realised, "Oh, maybe I shouldn't have said anything."
"No, it's okay." Ellie replied, "I guess that explains him a little."
Maria sighed, "Look, I'm not gonna ask what you're doing with him. But there are clearly things you don't know about Joel."
"Oh, like how he used to kill people?" Ellie questioned, "I know about that."
"So, you know why I'm concerned?" Maria shot back, "Has he stopped killing people?"
"Innocent ones." Ellie replied quickly.
"It's none of your business what Joel does, or did do." Jane blurted out, as she stood up quickly, "You know, my Uncle Tommy did the exact same thing? Are you worried about him? Didn't think so."
Maria sighed, "That's because Tommy was following Joel. The way you two are now."
"Fuck you." Jane blurted out frustratedly, "Don't act like you're concerned, if you're getting married to one."
"I'm just saying, be careful who you out your faith in." Maria explained calmly, "The only people who can betray us... are the ones we trust." The women paused, "Grab your coats, we're going to the movies."
Jane and Ellie sat in amongst the crowd of children, whilst a movie got projected onto a screen in front of them. Jane picked at the skin on her fingers, unable to shake away the things that Maria had said.
Ellie leaned towards her, before whispering, "Are you okay?"
Jane nodded, "Yeah, why?"
"You just seem pissed off about the whole Maria thing." Ellie explained quietly, looking behind them to see Maria talking to an adult at the back of the room. Ellie suggested, "Come on, let's leave."
Jane questioned, as she followed Ellie outside, "What about the movie?"
"Don't act like you were watching it." Ellie smirked, as she held Jane's hand and guided her through the crowd of children. Jane smiled to herself, flustered by her friend.
The two girls made their way back to their spare house, taking the long route to enjoy the snow. Ellie stopped telling puns, turning to look at a sound that Jane didn't hear.
Jane chuckled, "What?"
"You didn't hear that?" Ellie questioned, as she looked around.
Jane closed her eyes, as she heard a quiet muffle of voices coming from inside of a building. The voices sounded familiar to both Ellie and Jane, as they quietly ran towards the open windows. They hid behind a wall, whilst trying to listen to the two voices. Jane frowned at Ellie, when they realised it was the voices of Joel and Tommy.
Joel cried, "I'm failin' in my sleep. That's all I've ever done. Is fail her. Again and again."
"You want me to take her?" Tommy assumed hesitantly.
"I'm just gonna get her killed. I know it." Joel replied shakily, "I have enough to deal with with Jane. I mean, you know how worked up she gets. But I can't keep both of them alive by myself. I have to leave her."
Tommy sighed, "Joel."
"You can't tell anyone." Joel insisted, "Not even Maria. Tommy, you're the only one I trust. If anyone sees those bite marks on her, what's under her skin, they'll shoot her."
There was a silence for a moment, as Jane wiped the tears from her cheeks. She looked at Ellie, who was already storming back to the house. Unexpectedly, the door opened quickly, as Jane hid around the corner. She watched as Joel and Tommy walked outside, as she pressed her back up into the bricks, hoping she wouldn't be seen.
Jane made it back to the house, hoping she had arrived before Joel had, though she could hear the distant arguing from upstairs. She breathed, before quietly walking up the stairs.
Jane heard Joel's voice, "I made this decision for your own good. You'll be way better off with Tommy. He knows the way better than I do-"
"Do you give a shit about me, or not!" Ellie shouted.
"Of course I do."
"Then what are you so afraid of?" Ellie questioned, "I'm not her, you know? I'm not Jane. And Maria told me about Sarah and-"
"Don't." Joel interrupted sternly, "Don't say another word."
Ellie paused, "I'm sorry about your daughter, Joel. But I have lost people too."
Joel shot back, "You have no idea what loss is."
"Everybody I have cared for, has either died or left me." Ellie raised her voice, "Everybody, fucking except for you! So, don't tell me I will be safer with someone else because, the truth is, I'll just be more scared!"
Jane paused, tears swelling in her eyes in confusion. Did she mean nothing to Ellie?
"You're right. You're not my daughter, and I sure as hell ain't your dad." Joel instructed, "Now, come dawn, we're going our separate ways."
Joel opened the bedroom door so quickly that Jane didn't have time to hide. She stood in the doorway, tears running down her cheeks as she stared at them both.
Joel sighed, though didn't say anything, before walking passed Jane. She followed him downstairs, "Joel, stop. Please! Why are we leaving?"
Joel replied sternly, "It's for the best, J. Now, leave it."
"But what about Ellie?" Jane cried, "We can't just leave her with Uncle Tommy."
Joel turned around to face her quickly, holding her shoulders in reassurance, "I can't look after you both, alright? Now, go to bed, we're leaving early in the morning."
Jane cried, "No-"
"Jane." Joel interrupted sternly, "Enough."
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