soakingsneaker

First Impression: you don't have a cover... do you need one?

This story has a cool plot. However, the start is really confusing, and I find myself questioning what is happening throughout the chapter. Everything switches so fast, and there's no background information, so I'm confused and lost. There seems to be a lot of rambling in each of the chapters, which isn't good, because then your chapters are too lengthy. I would suggest cutting down the rambling and also splitting one chapter into two, so everything isn't so crammed. 

Remember that these suggestions are just my opinion, and this is your story, so make sure to write it the way you want it to be! If you don't agree with any of my suggestions, then ignore them :)

If you are feeling nice, I would greatly appreciate it if you give one of my stories a read, follow me, or give me a shoutout! 

- bluecrayonlady