SkarlitDawn

First Impression: Love the eerie aura of the cover!

Since there is only one chapter posted, there's not much I can say about things to work on, because I only have read one chapter of your work. I can't really come to any conclusions about how your writing will progress. So let's focus on what you did really well! I like the addition of the pictures, because it helps us imagine the scene in our head. Also, you have really great descriptions, and I don't even need the pictures to help me imagine everything in my head. The chapter was very action filled and I was on the edge of my seat the whole time. It leaves a lot of cliffhangers and unanswered questions, which really makes me want to read more. You are great at characterization, and I really get to know the main character, as if she were a real life person. Overall, this chapter was very well written, and I truly enjoyed it! Great work!

Remember that these suggestions are just my opinion, and this is your story, so make sure to write it the way you want it to be! If you don't agree with any of my suggestions, then ignore them :)

If you are feeling nice, I would greatly appreciate it if you give one of my stories a read, follow me, or give me a shoutout! If you enjoy art, I would love for you to make something for one of my stories, and I will post it! 

- bluecrayonlady