Author: TrueSeddieShipper
Genre: Fanfiction

What I liked:

The blunt description of the razors really made me cringe, both when she uses them and when Freddie discovers them in the bathroom.

What I didn't like:

The chapters are extremely short, and everything in those chapters just seems really telly. I don't want to be told everything that's happening, I want to feel like I'm experiencing what's happening, or like I can relate to it or feel sympathy and I couldn't do any of that.

Also, the way you end speech really ruins the flow of your writing. Putting a, for example, 'he said gently', or 'I enquired' at the end of everything that's said just makes speech seem choppy. It's not always necessary to describe how things are said, a reader can sometimes work out how the tone would be depending on the situation, or even from how the other speaker responds.

I stopped reading at the chapter called "The Rape"- honestly, I don't read chapter names/numbers, so I missed that, and I'll take part of the blame for that. But I'm sure in the guidelines I said I won't read anything to do with mature context i.e. sex. Now either you didn't read the guidelines, you ignored and submitted this with no warning, or you forgot. Either way, that's where I stopped reading. You said in terms of abuse, not specifying anything sexual.

Overall:

From what I read, it just seemed like a typical story about a girl with abusive parents and suicidal tendencies. I didn't feel anything for Sam, and both characters seemed out of character for the whole thing.

I'll give it a 3/10