Reading this book made me want to fucking die. It's definitely one of, if not the, worst.

It's not that Cathy is a terrible writer, because she really does have potential, if she tries. It's the sheer sickening sweetness of everything, the self pitying Mary Sue main character, the stupid love interest, and most of all THOSE FUCKING TANBERRYS, that really pissed me off.

CHERRY

So our main character, thirteen year old Cherry, lives with her dad in Glasgow before moving with him to live with his girlfriend Charlotte and Charlotte's four daughters. The Scottish sections are full of stereotypes, and Cherry is so self pitying that it does my head in. She constantly moans about how she's on the edge of everything, a loner who has no friends, how nobody likes her. In the first chapter she tips a plate of macaroni and chips on top of the school bully's head, and everyone in the cafeteria cheers like this is the coolest thing they've ever seen.

Cherry is half Japanese through her mum, who's dead, and we get a lot of Japanese sterotypes, plus Cherry describing her own hair as "blue black" and her eyes "almond shaped."

Cherry makes up a lot of stories and lies to sound more interesting, which should make her more relatable but somehow makes her more annoying. Her new stepsister Honey hates her, and hates her even more when Cherry "steals" her boyfriend, Shay.

At the end they end up together, which is so sickening, it honestly would have been so much better if Cherry had made some good friends instead.

SHAY

Shay Fletcher is the love interest, this stupid fucking idiot who constantly wears a black beanie because he's oh so cool and unique, EVEN IN THE HOTTEST WEATHER, and brings his guitar everywhere with him, like this kid legit never is without his guitar. Sometimes he randomly starts playing it in the middle of conversations but nobody minds because he's oh so talented and amazing. He always smells all nice like "darkness" or like "the ocean." So I can get what the ocean smells like, but what tf does darkness smell like? Also does this kid never sweat or wear too much aftershave, like a real teenage boy?

He's supposed to be Honey's boyfriend but flirts with Cherry anyway, what a great boyfriend. Plus Honey is portrayed as like totally unreasonable, as if she has no right to be angry that her boyfriend is flirting with her thirteen year old stepsister and subsequently dumps her for her.

THE TANBERRY SISTERS

I hate them so much. They're all so sugary sweet and over the top and disgusting. As a child I hated Honey, but she's probably the most relatable character now because I too would be an angry 24/7 if I had to live with these gobshites and my boyfriend chose my younger stepsister over me, even though he's only known her about two weeks.

They all have one specific over hyped trait that is their entire personality - Honey is good at art, Skye likes history and vintage clothes, Summer loves ballet, Coco loves animals and Cherry is half Japanese. They never fight or have any real problems and are not at all relatable. None of them really seem affected by their dad leaving home other than Honey, who is the only one who shows an emotion that's not excitement. The other girls are so excitable and over the top and it gets old extremely quickly. They use stupid slang, proclaim everything as cool, and seem to constantly talk in exclamation marks.

THE PARENTS

Charlotte, the Tanberry matriarch and Cherry's stepmother, is bland and boring, a perfect motherly figure. Paddy, Cherry's dad and the Tanberrys' stepdad, is constantly jolly and irritating.

Meanwhile Shay's dad is the literal antichrist, it's hilarious when he shows up at one point and calls the Tanberry's weirdos and insults them all, what a man, I think I've found my new favourite character.

This book was probably the worst Chocolate Box girl so far. I still have to read Summer's Dream, but until then Cherry Crush is rated the worst, at something like -50000000000000/5.